Spring Breeze Twenty Years

Chapter 1222 Friendships Also Need to Be Cultivated

Xiao Wei said, "I'm not staying cooped up every day, why do I have to go out and have fun? I feel great, doing things, taking walks, chatting, what's wrong with that?"

Xia Maosheng said, "I don't feel there's anything wrong with it. Isn't that how people live? Going to get off work, coming home, eating, sleeping, spending time with your wife and taking care of your son, what's wrong with that?"

Uncle Wang said, "It's not that you're wrong, there's no right or wrong. It's just that you guys don't live like young people. Do you interact with your colleagues at work? Have you really had any contact or made any friends? Have you ever gone out together? Singing, eating, shopping, doing activities, or even fighting? Have you ever done that?"

Xia Maosheng scratched his head: "It seems not. There really isn't. Everyone's busy. Everyone has their own things to do at work, a bunch of documents and tasks, or they're out and about. Who has time to chat idly?"

After get off work, everyone's rushing home for dinner. Those with wives go grocery shopping, those with partners go on dates, and those without wives or partners—who knows what they do after get off work? They just disappear as soon as work is over.

Xiaowei said, "I used to be at the company every day, running around to see documents. This year, I've been in Kyoto, attending classes every day for the first month and a half, doing market research. These past two days, I've had some things to do at home, setting up a swimming pool, and going with Xiaohui to check on accommodation for out-of-towners. We're about to open a new company in Hainan."

I feel like I'm living a pretty good life. I have plenty of things to do, and I don't like places like karaoke bars, nightclubs, or bars. I don't drink, so what's the point of going there? When I'm free, I just want to invite a few people over to sit and chat over some tea.

Uncle Wang said, "You guys don't understand what your aunt means. There's no such thing as a good or bad life, as long as you're comfortable. But you're already living a life similar to ours at your age. What will you do when you reach our age?"

Youth is a process of making friends, learning knowledge, and understanding the world. Take me for example, I don't go out much, I just go to get off work, come home, have a wife, kids, and grandchildren, right? But I have friends, people I made when I was young, and I have an understanding of the world that I learned when I was young.

Now, no matter when or what happens, I can make a few phone calls and get a dozen or twenty people to keep me company. We don't need to hang out together every day because we have a foundation; we all care about each other.

What about you? Let's not talk about the world or society. Your businesses are so big, you're probably better than me in that regard. Let's just talk about emotions. Family is an emotion, and so is friendship. You can't lack any kind of emotion. If you lack any, you'll have problems living your life.

The three of you, Xiaohui's situation is determined by his family, so he doesn't have many friends. Xia, you're an outsider, from a different social class, so you don't have any friends here either. As for Xiaowei, well, let's not even talk about him, right? In the future, let's say ten years from now.

Ten years from now, Xia, you'll be the most comfortable of the three of you. You'll still have classmates, and at least three or five friends back home. The other two, on the other hand, will only have each other; besides their families, they'll have nothing. Xiao Wei, think about it and see if what I'm saying is right.

Xiao Wei said, "That doesn't make sense either. Aren't Changhai Siwei and his group my buddies?"

Uncle Wang said, "That's why your aunt told you to go out and live the life of a young person. Even though you two grew up together, your relationship still needs to be nurtured and maintained. You two are already quite different now, and you brought them over here."

Although they didn't say anything explicitly, they all feel inferior in your presence. They used to come to our house all the time, but now? How many times a year? Is that how it is? Was it the same before they came and now? Think about it carefully.

If you don't maintain or cultivate the relationship, and you feel that nothing has changed and you're still the same as before, that's because you're the one in control, understand? You're the dominant party, but can they feel the same way you do?

At first, they felt you were a good friend, but then they realized there was a big gap between you. Once that gap widens, it grows bigger and bigger, and the feelings are gone. They might still be grateful to you for a while, but then they'll distance themselves from you. Ten years later, they might avoid you and tell others they don't know you.

In life, the most important thing is relationships, and the most unpredictable thing is also relationships. The ancients said that a small favor is appreciated, but a large favor is resented. What does that mean? It means that if you owe someone too much, the pressure is too great, and that favor becomes a burden, a nail, which you have to remove to feel comfortable.

This is the mentality of repaying a debt of gratitude, but the gap between them is widening. Will they ever surpass you in their lifetime? Let's not even talk about surpassing them, is it even possible for them to be about the same level as you? How can they repay you? They can't, and they can't kill you, so they can only pretend they don't know you and stay away from you.

Xiao Wei said, "Uncle, you're now at the department level. Don't your old friends and comrades feel a big gap between you now? Don't you feel any burden?"

Uncle Wang said, "I'm different from you. We went through thick and thin together when we were young. How old am I when I came to Fengtian? How many years have we been friends? And most importantly, I have no connection with them in terms of daily life, understand?"

We all have our own families and our own independent lives. When we hear that someone in the group has succeeded, we're all happy for them and thinking about how we can take advantage of them. We'll tell them, "You'd better do my job or I'll yell at you." Easy peasy.

Is that how you see it? You spend money and effort to get them out of their homes to earn money; everything they have is directly related to you. The power dynamic has shifted.

Xiao Wei's mother came out of the kitchen and said, "Yes, yes, that's it. I tell you all about it every year, urging you to visit each other more and play together, so you won't forget your roots. I just can't express it as well as your uncle, I can't explain it clearly."

Xiao Hong said, "I feel that what Lao Wang said makes sense. I didn't expect that now that Lao Wang has become a high-ranking official, his theories have also been elevated."

Uncle Wang said, "If you are the stronger party, you have to humble yourself, make more outreach, and look for opportunities to get closer to them, understand? Even if they want to associate with you, they will inevitably have to think more and consider your feelings, which is only human nature."

Many things become unmanageable because of overthinking; simple things become increasingly complicated. But those in their positions can't help but think about it. Right now, it doesn't matter between the three of you because you're a unit. Are others the same?

In the future, Xia's former classmates and friends will still be classmates and friends. At most, he might pat Xia on the shoulder and say, "Xia, you're awesome!" because he has no real connection with them in his life, understand? As long as Xia still considers them classmates and friends, they always will be.

As for you and Xiaohui, it's hard to say. Maosheng, you also need to pay attention to this. You should try to get closer to your colleagues at work and make some friends. At least when you get promoted, you'll have someone to take over your position, so you won't be abandoned wherever you go, understand?

Xiao Hui's dad's gone, and Lao Cheng's taking over. In the Northeast, look who's in charge—it's still Lao Chen. Even Xiao Hui's mom, she'll be just as effective here for the next ten or eight years. It's not just about rank; you also need connections.

Xia Maosheng said, "Okay, I'll pay attention to that in the future and interact with them more. I feel that it's not easy to make real friends, but it's not a problem to get closer to them. I don't need to ask anyone for anything."

Uncle Wang nodded and said, "Just look at their character. In officialdom, it's all about mutual exploitation. If their character is up to standard, there shouldn't be any major problems."

(End of this chapter)