Mud beads

The doctor did not answer Echizen Toru immediately.

The flashlight was brought close to Yu Zhu's eyes again, the white light shifting from left to right. She could feel the heat on her eyelids, but nothing changed in her vision.

It's still black.

It was so black that it had no distance, no shape, and no color.

She blinked rapidly twice, her heart suddenly pounding. With each rise and fall of her chest, a sharp pain shot deep within her ribs.

Can you hear me?

The doctor's voice came from above.

She opened her mouth, and it felt like something had been inserted into her throat; her trachea ached from the friction as it opened and closed.

In the void, the winter morning slowly rewinds.

She and Liang Dong stood side by side on the roadside waiting for a car. A north wind blew in through the gaps between the apartment buildings. He glanced down at her and reached out to pull up the collar of her down jacket. The zipper head touched her chin, feeling a sudden coolness, but his fingers were warm.

They parked the car on the side of the road and got in.

As the driver spoke of his wife, a familiar smile appeared on his lips in the rearview mirror. Their hands touched through the brown paper bag, palms turned over, and fingers slowly intertwined.

Yu Zhu subconsciously clenched her fingers, her hand taut, as if being pulled by tape.

Suddenly, the blue-gray front of the car filled the field of vision with the snow-white light of the sky.

Yu Zhu's lips trembled slightly.

"Liang..."

The sound had barely escaped when she bit it.

The train platform from my dream appeared in my mind without warning.

An autumn sky. A green train. Shrinking and receding in the clear sunlight—

Echigo stared at Yu Zhu's face.

Large tears welled up from those unfocused eyes.

She suddenly began to tremble. At first, only her fingers, which were touching the syringe, trembled slightly, then her jaw started chattering. Her whole body gradually began to rise and fall uncontrollably on the hospital bed, causing the bed rails to rattle softly.

Koshima Toru suddenly looked up and saw that the numbers on the monitor were rising rapidly.

"Ma'am, please relax and don't be nervous." The doctor immediately leaned down and gently held her shoulders. "Just because you can't see now doesn't mean you won't be able to see in the future. Your eyes weren't directly hit, so we currently suspect a head injury affecting the optic nerve. Further examination is needed—"

Yu Zhu was still trembling.

Her trembling turned into spasms, her shoulder blades pounding against the mattress erratically. The numbers on the monitor quickly turned red, and a piercing alarm blared. The doctors and nurses exchanged a glance, surrounded the bed, and pressed down on her twitching shoulders and arms.

Eshima Toru took a step back.

Through the gaps between the medical staff, he looked at Yu Zhu again.

Half of her hair was gone; the other half had been shaved off by doctors when she arrived at the hospital and was now covered with thick bandages. Without any hair to hide it, the torrent of tears flowed down her shaved, bluish sideburns and into her ears.

The monitor alarm was still ringing, and the doctor's attempts to comfort her continued. But suddenly, Toru Koji felt the room was eerily quiet.

He seemed to hear an echo from the deepest part of fate.

Heaven finally punished him.

Is this retribution?

His lips twitched slightly: "Liang Dong is fine."

On the hospital bed, Yu Zhu turned her head towards him.

Echizen swallowed hard, then slowly said, "He's receiving treatment on the other side, and his condition is better than yours."

This is a lie so clumsy that it cannot withstand any scrutiny.

But Yu Zhu quieted down.

She kept her unfocused eyes open, gazing in his direction, her body gradually ceasing its trembling.

Moth

Yu Zhu was placed in the intensive care unit.

Visitors are not allowed in the ICU, so for most of the day, she was only surrounded by medical staff in protective suits. Footsteps came and went, the machines beeped repeatedly, and the IV pump beeped every now and then. Someone would draw blood, turn her over, and change her dressings. Before their hand touched her, they would occasionally say something, but more often than not, she wouldn't know someone was near until the action was already on her.

In her world, there is no longer the cycle of day and night.

Most of the time, she lay in nothingness and deathly silence.

Only Toru Echizama is allowed to enter occasionally.

Every time he came, he would stand by her bedside and talk to her for a while.

He said the car accident caused traumatic brain injury and affected her optic nerve. However, her eyeball was not directly damaged, and with timely treatment, the chances of recovery are high. Further examinations are needed, and she will be jointly evaluated by ophthalmologists and neurosurgeons once her condition stabilizes.

He spoke more slowly and clearly than the doctor.

He occasionally mentioned the time. What time is it now? What's the date today? Is it raining outside? The wind was very strong yesterday, and tomorrow is Lunar New Year's Eve.

Yu Zhu never responded to him.

She seemed not to be blind, but rather mute.

She lets others manipulate her, and only when the movement suddenly touches her body will her shoulders instinctively tighten.

She learned to control her emotions.

As soon as the dream drew near, she began to count her breaths. She counted from one to one hundred, then started counting again.

Liang Dong received treatment on the other side.

Eshima Toru said this.

Moth

Five days later, Yu Zhu was transferred to a regular ward.

This is a private hospital room. There's no cacophony of equipment from the intensive care unit, only the steady, soft beeping of the cardiac monitor. The window is probably cracked open, letting in occasional gusts of cold air from areas not covered by the heating, carrying the smells of holly and damp earth from downstairs in the hospital.

Yu Zhu didn't know how big the room was.

All she knew was that there was a bedside table to the left of her hospital bed and an IV stand to the right. The bathroom was not far from the bed, the door was always open, and the exhaust fan inside made a low hum. She hardly got out of bed; when she needed to use the restroom, she would press the bell by the bed, and a caregiver would come in.

This was also taught to her by Echizen Toru.

He's there almost every day.

In the morning, there was a light knock on the door twice, and Echizen Toru's voice came from outside.

"it's me."

He waited outside the door for a moment as usual before pushing it open and coming in.

Yu Zhu first heard the door hinges turn, followed by the sound of shoes hitting the ground. He wasn't walking fast; each step was heavy, as if deliberately letting her know where he was.

The faint scent of wood gradually masked the smell of disinfectant in the room.

Echigo walked to the foot of the bed and stopped.

The gauze on her forehead had been changed to a smaller size, and the scabs on her facial abrasions were beginning to fall off. Having not eaten properly for several days, her once full cheeks had become gaunt, and her chin was sunken into the loose collar of her hospital gown. Her eyes were still dark and beautiful, but they were wide open, their gaze unfocused.

"I'll raise the bed for you," he said, pressing the button at the foot of the bed.

The motor emitted a deep hum, and the bed vibrated.

Yu Zhu's shoulders jerked, her fingers gripping the sheets tightly as she instinctively backed away.

Koshima Toru immediately released the button.

The bed only rose a little, stopping halfway.

"It's the bed that's moving," he repeated. "Raise the bed and have breakfast."

Echigo waited a while longer, until Yu Zhu's heaving chest gradually calmed down, before pressing the button again. This time, the head of the bed slowly rose, and she went from lying flat to sitting up. Her hospital gown slipped down a little as she moved, revealing the bruises near her collarbone that had not yet faded.

After the bed came to a stop, he walked back to her side.

Echizen propped up a movable table in front of the hospital bed. When the table approached her abdomen, he used his hand to block it in advance, preventing the edge from touching her.

The lunchboxes were opened one by one.

The lid clicked open with a crisp sound as it was pried open under pressure, and steam, along with the aroma of food, quickly escaped.

Echigo pulled out a chair and sat down on the edge of the bed: "You don't have much to eat right now, so just make do with what you have."

As he spoke, the metal spoon touched the edge of the lunchbox with a soft sound.

He scooped up some porridge and held it in mid-air to cool it. Yu Zhu heard his breathing approach and felt a warm current in front of her.

Open your mouth.

She didn't move.

Echizen Toru waited with a spoon in his hand.

For four days, she didn't say a word to him. When he was admitted to the ICU, she was awake but also seemed asleep. He talked about treatment, examinations, and that his vision would recover, but she remained quietly lying there, rarely even turning her face towards him.

Now, her lips suddenly moved.

"Where is Liang Xia?"

Her voice was so dry it was almost unlike her own.

Echizen's hand froze in mid-air.

Yu Zhu stared at him quietly with her unfocused eyes. She couldn't see his face suddenly freeze, nor could she see his fingers tightening around the spoon.

Echizen lowered his head and scraped the side of the bowl with his spoon.

Yu Zhu spoke again.

Why doesn't Liang Xia come to see me?