Love Apartment: Yifei is my junior aunt

Chapter 190 Ziqiao's Teaching Plan

The next morning, Zeng Xiaoxian arrived at 3602 feeling weak and listless.

Ziqiao looked at Zeng Xiaoxian, who was trembling all over and groaning with every step he took, and immediately began to gloat.

"Teacher Zeng, have you been... bombarded by anti-aircraft artillery?"

Meijia clicked her tongue in amazement: "I really didn't expect that anti-aircraft guns could even bounce back these days."

"Hahahaha..." Everyone burst into laughter.

Even if no one except Nanfeng and Yumo knows what happened last night, everyone can tell with their own eyes whose handiwork Zeng Xiaoxian is in now.

"Serves you right!"

Yifei and Nanfeng spat at the same time.

I gave you a chance, but you didn't do it.

Zeng Xiaoxian sat down at the dining table with a forced smile: "I don't want to recall what happened last night."

He doesn't feel much pain now, but his whole body feels sore and numb, like it's falling apart.

"Teacher Zeng, just from your appearance, I can already deduce 99100."

"Guan Gu-kun, it's about 70-80% there."

Guan Gu Shenqi and Curry Sauce, who hadn't appeared in public for a long time, sang in unison.

"I know." Guan Gu adjusted his glasses. "It's just that using 9910 can prove that my reasoning is even better than 7788."

"Mr. Detective Guan Gu, would you like to explain your reasoning in detail?" Yi Fei asked with a smile, though the ladle in her hand had been broken in two.

Guan Gu pretended nothing had happened and quickly lowered his head to eat his breakfast.

Meijia expertly handed Zeng Xiaoxian a bowl and chopsticks, then looked up and asked in confusion, "Aren't Zhanbo and Wanyu coming for breakfast?"

Yifei shook her head: "They didn't get back until after six this morning, and they're sleeping together now."

"Sleep together?!" Everyone exclaimed in surprise.

Ziqiao murmured in disbelief, "I never expected Zhanbo to be so good at hiding his true abilities. He pretended to be stupid for so long and finally seized the opportunity to win over Wanyu in just one night."

Curry Sauce muttered to herself, "I hope you mean 'got it done' literally."

"What are you all thinking?" Yifei explained helplessly, "They sleep together in terms of time, but they sleep separately in terms of space."

Zhanbo and Wanyu sleeping together—it's amazing that these people could come up with such a thing.

Even she, as the older sister, couldn't have come up with such a wonderful idea.

"Tch~" Everyone's excitement was in vain.

I thought I could enjoy watching the drama unfold again.

"By the way, Yu Mo, why are you so happy today?"

Yifei, who knows Yumo best, looked at Yumo in confusion: "You haven't stopped laughing since you came in."

"Really?" Yu Mo touched the corners of her mouth, which were turned up in a smile. "Maybe it's because the weather is particularly nice today."

I know, I know why!

Zhang Wei, who was silently eating breakfast, suddenly looked up and met Nan Feng's ambiguous smile.

He immediately stopped uttering a single word.

Zeng Xiaoxian picked up the chopsticks with trembling hands, but before he could even hold them for three seconds, the chopsticks had already fallen onto the table.

As Yifei said, Flash is her defense mechanism, and it's not something you can control at will.

Zeng Xiaoxian really got a hard hit this time.

However, on the other hand, if Zeng Xiaoxian hadn't even dared to rush up and hug Yifei last night, and had let her walk into the bedroom, then he would have been completely ruined.

"Is Teacher Zeng really alright?" Yu Mo asked Yi Fei hesitantly.

Yifei glanced at Zeng Xiaoxian and reached out to touch him.

After confirming that Zeng Xiaoxian was perfectly fine, Yifei casually said, "It's nothing, that bastard is thick-skinned, he'll probably be fine after he wakes up tomorrow."

"Hehehe..." Zeng Xiaoxian forced a stiff smile.

Normally, he would have already argued with Yifei, but since he had received a watch from her last night, he was too embarrassed to argue with her now.

The group chatted and ate breakfast together, creating a warm and lively scene.

After finishing breakfast, Zeng Xiaoxian looked at Ziqiao expectantly: "How should we train them on conversation skills for the future?"

That's right, the person in charge of the "Chatting Skills" section is still our playboy and sales con artist—Lu Ziqiao.

Ziqiao slowly swallowed the porridge in his mouth and said, "Teacher Zeng, you should really be grateful to have a brother like me."

"For you, I specially compiled the section on conversation techniques from the 'Lüshi Chunqiu' last night."

"If you can figure out the secrets, not only will you be able to deal with sponsors, you might even rise to the top and become your station director's... lackey!"

"Oh?"

Seeing how confidently Ziqiao spoke, Zeng Xiaoxian didn't care about his last words, "lackey."

Xiao Xian raised an eyebrow and reached out to Zi Qiao: "Stop bragging, let's see what you've got."

"The thing is right here."

Ziqiao pulled out a thick A4 paper document, about twenty pages thick, from somewhere. The cover had four large characters written in black and white: "Lüshi Chunqiu".

"Is this the legendary ultimate guide to picking up girls?" Yifei commented with a disdainful look. "It looks pretty ordinary."

"This is a super, super, super, super simplified and stripped-down version."

Ziqiao calmly said, "The so-called chat techniques are just routine tricks to fool people."

"When have you ever seen someone pick up girls just by talking?"

Everyone nodded in unison: "Haven't you always just relied on your smooth talk to pick up girls? After all, you're a poor wretch with nothing to your name."

"You're all amateurs, truly amateurs."

Ziqiao sighed, "You only see me using my words to coax girls into submission, you have no idea how much preparation I did for it."

"Do you even know what it means to have one minute on stage requires ten years of practice off stage?"

Meijia said sarcastically, "And now you're lecturing us?"

"To be honest, I don't need all that fancy stuff to pick up girls," Yifei said confidently. "All it takes is a romantic candlelight dinner between a man and a woman..."

"No candlelight dinner!" the crowd shouted.

Yifei pouted, looking unwilling.

There's nothing wrong with candlelight dinners; there's nothing unromantic about them.

Yifei probably still hasn't figured out a fact: it's not that candlelight dinners are bad, but that the candlelight dinners she prepared were bad.

"Teacher Zeng, in principle, I would not pass on Lüshi Chunqiu to outsiders."

"But given our relationship, I will make an exception and pass on the Lüshi Chunqiu to you today. You must not disappoint me."

Ziqiao said earnestly.

Zeng Xiaoxian accepted the Lüshi Chunqiu with both hands and solemnly said, "I will definitely work hard!"

As he spoke, Xiaoxian trembled as he opened the Lu Family Annals. In a daze, everyone seemed to see a golden light shining on Zeng Xiaoxian's face.

"Wow..." Zeng Xiaoxian exclaimed.

"Wow... the Golden Legend!"

Nanfeng teased, mimicking the voice of a bearded dwarf.

"Wow...why are they all tables of contents?"

Zeng Xiaoxian's excitement lasted for less than a few seconds. As he flipped through the twenty-odd pages of the table of contents, his small eyes were filled with great doubt.

"I already said it was put together last night on short notice. There wasn't enough time, so I could only put together a table of contents," Ziqiao said matter-of-factly.

Zeng Xiaoxian slammed his hand on the table with the table of contents: "Where's the main text?"

Ziqiao blinked: "Of course the main text is in my head."

Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned by Ziqiao's words. He scratched his head in near collapse and shouted, "Then why did you give me a catalog?"

"Doesn't this seem very ceremonial?"

"Go to hell."

Zeng Xiaoxian angrily threw the useless catalog into Ziqiao's arms.

"Teacher Zeng, calm down."

Nanfeng laughed and said, "Look at the twenty-odd pages of table of contents that Ziqiao prepared. Does this look like something you can learn in a morning?"

"Lu Ziqiao, hurry up and bring up your real stuff, or I'll replace you."

Ziqiao looked around, then said with a smug grin, "Is there anyone in the entire apartment more suitable than me?"

"Naive, don't limit your choices to people just living in the apartment."

Nanfeng threatened, "If you, this little prince of love, don't intend to teach him real skills... I'll gather all your ex-girlfriends together to form a victims' alliance."

"I believe they must still have vivid memories of being scammed. With so many ex-girlfriends of yours, even if you piece them together, it will be enough for Teacher Zeng to learn from."

Yu Mo laughed and said, "Good idea. As for whether anyone will become a sacrifice for the Victims Alliance at that time... it doesn't matter."

"Do you two really have to be so dramatic?" Ziqiao said, pursing his lips. "I was just joking with Teacher Zeng, Nanfeng, you don't have to be so ruthless."

"You can joke around anytime, but we need to get down to business now."

Nanfeng smiled brightly: "Or are you just that confident that I definitely won't be able to get your ex-girlfriends' contact information?"

Ziqiao was quite flustered by Nanfeng's words. He looked around and said, "It's not that I don't want to teach Teacher Zeng, but this isn't my teaching place."

Zeng Xiaoxian asked in confusion, "Then where is your teaching venue?"

"Of course...it's here!"

Ziqiao snapped his fingers, and everything around him instantly began to blur.

The scene shifts, and everyone except Curry Sauce, who continues to lock herself in her room to prepare for the exam, has arrived at the Sunny Day Bar.

After finishing breakfast, the group looked at the bar, which appeared to be the same as usual, and were immediately puzzled.

"Is this your teaching space? You're planning to teach Teacher Zeng in a bar?" Zhang Wei asked.

"That's right." Ziqiao raised his head proudly.

"As I just said, so-called chat techniques are nothing but formulaic deception."

"But we were short on time and had a heavy workload. One morning was not enough for me to teach Teacher Zeng all the routines I had summarized."

"And even if I could teach him, given the efficiency of the CPU around Teacher Zeng's neck, it's another matter whether he could use it flexibly."

"Hey, is my CPU that bad?" Zeng Xiaoxian protested defiantly.

Everyone nodded in unison: "Very bad."

Zeng Xiaoxian: ...

[Waaaaah...]

Ziqiao paused for a moment and continued, "So instead of spending a whole morning teaching Teacher Zeng, it would be better to teach him the core points of conversation skills and then let him practice them directly."

"As long as you can convince others to buy your stuff, you can convince sponsors to vote for you."

Believe me, real-world experience is always the fastest way to level up!

Zeng Xiaoxian understood: "You mean you want me to do sales?!"

Ziqiao nodded matter-of-factly: "When you go to solicit sponsorships, aren't you just promoting your show and yourself? What else can you do if you don't learn to promote yourself?"

"That does make some sense, but what do you want me to sell?"

"Of course, I'll sell your autographed photos."

Although Ziqiao's teaching was a bit absurd, he had already planned it out in his mind: "Teacher Zeng, think about it carefully, isn't promoting your autographed photos the same as promoting yourself?"

"Your experience in persuading customers throughout the entire sales process can be almost directly applied to persuading sponsors. This is no longer teaching; it's practically a real-world exercise."

"As long as you can sell your autographed photo at the price I set, I guarantee your conversation skills will be absolutely perfect."

Ziqiao suddenly thought of something, and he patted Zeng Xiaoxian's head encouragingly, "Last night I infiltrated your pickled vegetable fan club and lied to them that there was an event at the Sunny Day Bar today, with free drinks and free cakes."

"Although we don't know exactly how many people will fall for the scam, there's a good chance that some of these customers are your fans."

"Just like Lisa chooses the most suitable sponsors for you, the probability of selling autographed photos to fans will also be higher."

Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned: "You want me to sell autographed photos for my fans?!"

"Otherwise what? These days, celebrities make their money from their fans, don't they?" Ziqiao replied nonchalantly.

Zeng Xiaoxian flatly refused: "No way, that would be too damaging to my public image."

"Are you stupid? Put on sunglasses and a mask, and borrow Nanfeng's 'Heavenly Voice' bow tie to change your voice. Who would know you're Zeng Xiaoxian then?"

Ziqiao tempted, "And don't you want to test just how much your fans like you? Even if you don't take the opportunity to sell your products at a high price, it would be good to hear their opinions of you."

Zeng Xiaoxian was stunned for a moment, then swallowed hard, looking eager.

He admitted that he had been persuaded by Ziqiao.

Seeing that Zeng Xiaoxian had silently given in, Ziqiao took out a WeChat payment QR code that he had prepared in advance and handed it to him.

"A set of autographed photos is suggested at 99.8 yuan. The price can only go up, not down. I will send you the key points of the sales pitch to your phone later."

"Remember, you must use this WeChat payment QR code to receive money."

Zeng Xiaoxian stared at the WeChat payment QR code in his hand, utterly bewildered: "What's so special about this WeChat payment QR code?"

"Nothing special, this is my QR code for receiving payments," Zi Qiao chuckled. "I'm a bit broke lately, so consider this money as my tuition fee."

"This works?!?!"

Zeng Xiaoxian was struck dumb.

So after all that, your tutorial just got me to sell my autographed photos so you could make money!

Zeng Xiaoxian looked at the others with a wronged expression: "Aren't you all going to do anything about Ziqiao doing this?"

"What do you care?" Even Meijia, who always goes against Ziqiao, seemed to have no objection to Ziqiao's behavior.

Looking at Zeng Xiaoxian's indignant expression, she suddenly understood something. Meijia asked timidly, "Teacher Zeng, you don't really think your autographed photos can sell for a lot of money, do you?"

Zeng Xiaoxian was deeply hurt by Meijia's words, and he clutched his chest and backed away repeatedly.

No wonder you all ignored it; it turns out you all secretly believed my autographed photos wouldn't sell!

Yifei patted Zeng Xiaoxian on the shoulder sympathetically, but did not object to Ziqiao's behavior.

"It's rare for Ziqiao to come up with such a reliable teaching plan. Considering how busy he's been these past two days, let him earn some hard-earned money."

"He earns his living through hard work?" Zeng Xiaoxian pointed to himself with a blank expression.

"He earns his money through hard work, why should I be the one who has to work hard!"

I'm coming

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(End of this chapter)