Love Untangled

Jasmine

After washing my hair he took some soap and started to soap my arm. His touch was gentle. "C-can I wash you?" I said flushed. He looked at me with a hint of a smile. "I want you to." He said. "But I think it is best if you do not." Benjamin cupped my face with one hand.

"Tell me what you feel." He asked holding my gaze with his hazel eyes. I fumbled with my hand on the skin of his chest. I looked up at him and then averted my eyes again. "Tell me." He said. "I don't know, it's stupid." I flushed.  How could I tell him something I did not know how to describe myself.

"Mhh…" He pressed me to continue. "I want to be near you and touch you, even though we are this close. I want to come closer." My breathing stocked as I said this, but it was the whole truth. "I feel that too." He said tracing my lips with his finger. My lips parted a little. I looked at him and bit him softly. His eyes seemed to roll to the back of his head.

"Habib." He breathed. "Yes." I said. "We need to take this slow and we already skipped a step." He said waving his hand through his hair. "What step?" I asked.

He still held my head in his hand and he towed me backwards. He pressed me up against the wall. His nose lingered near mine. He kissed the corner of my mouth. "May I?" He breathed against my lips. I nodded 'yes' and he leaned in. I closed my eyes as his lips feverishly smashed into mine.

He guided me step by step and inserted his tongue into my mouth. He playfully touched my tongue with his. It felt like I went under water. As I drowned in everything I felt. He groaned a little and stopped kissing me. He placed his forehead against mine and it took a while before his breath retuned to even.

"How was that?" His hot breath touched my skin. "Did that hurt?" He asked me. Before I could answer him, he kissed me again, this time a little more gently.

"I think it would be a good idea if I finish this shower alone." He said. "I don't mind to wait." I told him. "I know beautiful, but I need to be alone for just a few minutes." He pleaded. "It won't take long." He urged.

"Okay." I said unwillingly and got out of the shower. There were maids outside. "Let's get you dressed into something else." One of them said. "I can manage." I told her. I had seen them once, at the maids breakfast table.

"How was it?" One of the maids boldly asked. They gave me a red satin dress. It was the shortest dress I had ever worn. It was best to nothing. Benjamin walked into the room appraising my dress.

"I think I need a cold shower again." He said laughing loudly. I did not understand his joke. "What do you want to do?" He asked. I thought about it and then my stomach grumbled. He walked to a little bar in his room and poured himself a drink. "Are you thirsty?" He asked.

"No, but I am a little hungry." I admitted. There was so much food present today, but in all honestly I had been too nervous to eat.

Benjamin called Rabia to prepare some food for us. He took me to the area in his chambers where the big couches were. Before we sat down, there was a knock on the door. A few servants brought us platters of fruit and bread.

He smiled at me. "So now we can finally begin our first night together." He smiled sheepishly. "What do you want to do?" I asked him.

"Let's watch a movie together." He said as he took me onto his lap.

"Are you okay?" He asked tilting my chin up, so he could look into my eyes. "Yes." I said. Benjamin pouted his lips slightly. "I've told you, you're not a very good liar." Ben said.

"It's just… I have always been told that it would hurt and that woman didn't enjoy spending time like that." I didn't look at him.

"Well… did you know that virginity is not a medical term?" He asked with a serious expression. I frowned. No, I did not know that. "A first time can hurt for many reasons." He continued." Some people believe that tearing the hymen, explains the pain that some woman experience when they first have sex. However, not everyone has a hymen, and even when they do, it doesn't always tear." Benjamin stroke through my hair.

He took a grape and fed it to me. As I chewed I just listened to him. He fed me one more and then he continued talking, while twisting one of my curls around his finger. "In fact, the pain may instead come from inadequate lubrication, or anxiety that causes muscle spasms, or a partner who rushes or is too forceful." I flinched by the idea of the latter.

"I can imagine that." I said thinking of how this night would of ended if I was to be married to Saeed. I felt guilty towards my elder sister. I could not imagen how her life would be like. Would Daniel be good to Naïma as well? I was wondering about her experience.

"Did I hurt you just now?" Benjamin asked playfully. "No." I breathed. He cocked his head to the side and stroke his nose along my jawline.

What was it that he did to me?! I had never in my life felt this way before. It was like a hunger in me had been awakened. "Do you enjoy me?" Ben breathed against my lips. "Yes." I said breathless. Ben kissed me and I felt as if I went under water again. Yes, yes I enjoyed everything about him.. The way I felt was overwhelming.