I turned reality into a romantic comedy.

"But people live in this world based on identity, and bloodline is just the simplest way. Isn't she the same? In this respect, she is just like her childhood sweetheart. Because a certain identity from the past is deeply rooted, she misses the key period of cognition and emotional transformation, and in the end, she becomes the loser in the relationship."

"However, let's not talk about this kind of thing right now. How about I get a pair of pants first?"

"If you agree, I can take off my swimsuit and give it to you."

"Then it will become Wen Yun who has no clothes and is trapped here, right? There's no point in repeating this role-reversal cycle a third time, hey?"

"So this is the third time? Then I believe it was indeed an accident. After all, Junqian shouldn't be so perverted as to plan for Xiaoxi's swimsuit to be washed away. But her figure is surprisingly good."

"I feel that the person who should least compliment someone's figure is Wen Yun."

Should I apply sunscreen?

"...Is this some kind of new way of referring to someone? I feel like it would be terrible if someone saw it."

"Actually, it's already bad enough that the two of us sitting here are seen by someone, especially since someone's in a completely naked state right now, so people will definitely misunderstand..."

Before Zhu Wenyun could finish speaking, Chen Junqian had already reached out and covered her mouth, displaying a look of 'Sister, please stop talking,' which was somewhat like he was dying and had no will to live. But it seemed he was a step too late, because less than a minute after she finished speaking, a series of light and unguarded footsteps suddenly came from the outer edge of the reef.

"Qianqian, Xiaoxi? Are you over here?"

A sweet, clear voice, tinged with a hint of doubt, drifted in through the narrow passage on the sea breeze; it was Lin Mu's voice.

When Chen Junqian first found the lower half of someone's external armor, he made up an excuse to send Mu Mu away, saying that it must have been washed over from somewhere else. Lin Mu would never have thought that someone on her side had their clothes washed away, so she was easily fooled and went to collect seashells with Gu Lingguo. Right now, she was holding a small handful of pretty seashells that she and Gu Lingguo had just picked up on the beach. Since she hadn't seen the brother and sister for a while, she volunteered to follow the footprints to find them.

Of course, she also wanted to show Chen Junqian a super pretty big seashell she had picked up.

...I knew it would turn out like this.

Actually, after Chen Xi left, if Chen Junqian had to choose the female lead he least wanted to see in this state, it would definitely be Lin Mu. After all, Xu Youwei and Shen Nianqiu are essentially the same as Zhu Wenyun, who is sitting next to him now, who has never eaten pork but has seen pigs run. Gu Linguo, on the other hand, is a seasoned romantic comedy expert and can understand what happened with a little explanation.

But it just so happened that Lin Mu was the one who came.

He instinctively wanted to stand up and run away, but reason held him down. After all, his childhood sweetheart, in terms of romantic experience, was essentially a primary school student pretending to be a high school student. This was completely different from his younger sister, who, although a year younger, had already read a lot about R18 and even R18G in history books and was essentially an experienced adult.

If I were seen here, my life would probably be over.

In that instant, Chen Junqian suddenly understood the feelings of many veteran romantic comedians, except that they were in a women's bathhouse, while he was at sea.

"Should we keep quiet?"

Although she had maintained a calm and composed demeanor in front of Chen Junqian, Zhu Wenyun couldn't help but feel nervous at the thought of being seen in such a confined space by the person she had been most worried about.

After all, her strategy has always been that if there has to be a girl to provoke Lin Mu, then she must not be herself. After all, if such a person encounters the strongest childhood sweetheart in reality, the outcome is almost a foregone conclusion; she can be used as a stepping stone.

Is it possible that you've already spoken those words aloud?

Chen Junqian conveyed this signal with his eyes, speechless.

Outside, Lin Mu, who had heard the rustling noises, walked closer and closer. The girl's footsteps had already bypassed the screen rock at the entrance, and she might peek in at any moment to check the situation.

Is there anywhere to hide?

As Chen Junqian was pondering, he suddenly saw Zhu Wenyun nod thoughtfully, as if she had thought of something. In that instant, her expression reminded him of Gu Linguo, and he even imagined her intelligent voice echoing in his mind:

"This story is also depicted in romantic comedies!"

The next second, he was submerged in the water.

A romantic comedy my foot!

It would be more accurate to say that this event is also recorded in Edogawa Ranpo's "The Human Chair".

However, Chen Junqian was no longer able to complain, because at the same time, Lin Mu had also poked his head in and saw Zhu Wenyun sitting in the middle of the puddle in an extremely strange posture, with her legs stretched straight out as if she was pressing down on something, while her upper body was exaggeratedly leaning back, showing off her already exaggerated figure to the fullest extent.

"Hey, Wenjun? Why are you soaking in the water all by yourself?"

Lin Mu blinked her innocent big eyes and took two steps inside with a puzzled look on her face.

"Is this puddle comfortable?"

"...Well, it's quieter here, Mu Mu, please don't come in. There are a lot of pebbles and seashell fragments on the ground, which could hurt your feet."

Upon seeing Lin Mu, Zhu Wenyun leaned back even further, as if she were doing the starting position for a sit-up. The gap in her swimsuit was stretched wider, revealing a stretch of fair and smooth skin.

"Oh, by the way, has Wenyun seen Qianqian and Xiaoxi? It's almost dark, it feels like we can gather them and head back."

"Xiao Xi, I saw her walk towards the hotel. She must have gone to get something. I didn't see Jun Qian. Wasn't he with you riding motorcycles?"

"That happened more than ten minutes ago. Hmm, I'll go look for it again."

As he spoke, Lin Mu generously handed over another seashell from his hand:

"Oh right, give Wenjun one of these. I just picked them up on the beach with Lin Guo."

"Thank you, Mu Mu."

Watching Zhu Wenyun maintain this posture, somewhat laboriously reaching out to take the seashell, Lin Mu blinked in confusion. She seemed to have seen another inexplicable outline behind Zhu Wenyun the moment she stood up, but ultimately shook her head.

"I'll go first then. If Wenjun sees Qianqian, tell him we're all waiting for him under the parasol."

"Well, I see."

After Lin Mu left, Zhu Wenyun finally reached out and gently pushed away the thing that had been pressing against her inner thigh for several minutes. She turned around and stood up to wake up the male protagonist, who was in the form of an underwater chair, to announce that the crisis was over, when she saw his tightly closed eyes again.

Is this... fainting?

P.S.: Thank you for reading and subscribing.

Chapter 120: Please Let Me Perform CPR! (4k5)

Generally speaking, for various reasons that we all understand, most love stories end with a kiss that's almost like a contract, and then they go straight to the "and they lived happily ever after" stage. So in various literary works, there are often those naive and clueless characters who mistakenly believe that having a child is the next step after the kiss.

Conversely, it is precisely because the step of 'kissing' is often the formal confirmation or even the end of a relationship that many artists throughout history have chosen to make a big deal out of it in various ways, artificially creating certain situations and inventing certain props, so that the male and female protagonists can achieve this result and then choose to end the relationship, or use it as the beginning of another story.

However, if we focus on romantic comedies, then artificial respiration is definitely the most common scene.

Please let me perform CPR!

First of all, please remember not to discuss whether the CPR technique is correct or effective in romantic comedies. After all, whether it's drowning, heatstroke, or other emergencies, in our worldview, they are just stage props to advance the romance between the male and female protagonists. So, whether it's the male or female protagonist, if you encounter a similar situation, please just kiss her openly and honestly!

Just like in countless fairy tales, in a world of idealism, the belief itself is the most miraculous magic. If you simply hold onto this belief and bend down, the other person will surely open their eyes as you wish.

[Condition for achievement: Perform CPR on any female protagonist in a romantic comedy, or be the one to perform CPR on you]

As it turns out, just as Chen Junqian had envisioned, in this world that is increasingly resembling a romantic comedy, as long as he, the male protagonist, and the female protagonists are placed in a possible scenario, and someone in that scenario holds a strong desire, then the program called romantic comedy will be activated, automatically starting to prepare everything for the stage.

For example, even though he was fully conscious, he couldn't open his eyes or move his limbs. He could only watch as Zhu Wenyun carried him ashore, gently patting his face and calling his name while covering his lower body.

However, Chen Xi, whom he had sent out earlier, returned successfully from the hotel and also got the bath towel that Chen Junqian wanted. When she saw him lying there on the board, she ran over in a few steps, clearly startled.

What happened to my brother?

"We don't know yet, it looks like she's fainted."

As she answered, Zhu Wenyun took the bath towel from Chen Xi's hand, wrapped it around Chen Junqian's waist, and tied it securely around his groin. She then pondered for a moment before pulling Chen Xi aside and whispering:

"His breathing was steady, and there were no signs of drowning around his mouth and nose, so it seemed more like he was pretending to be asleep."

"Pretending to be asleep?"

Upon hearing Zhu Wenyun mention those two words, Chen Xi subconsciously nodded in agreement:

“My brother is really good at pretending to be asleep. In fact, I suspect that most of the time when I go to his room to wake him up in the morning, he's pretending to be asleep. But he was fine just now, so why is he suddenly pretending to be asleep now? Also, when did Sister Wen come over and see my brother?”

Zhu Wenyun wasn't so bold as to recount all her experiences, giving a vague and perfunctory answer before finally offering her own:

"I just got here too. I saw him lying there. As for why he was pretending to be asleep, it's easy to understand. Even if it's not anime, there are always scenes like this in romance dramas."

"Artificial respiration?"

After being given this hint by Zhu Wenyun, Chen Xi immediately realized what was going on.

"Yes, artificial respiration."

Chen Junqian was speechless at the two girls who had been whispering to each other in the distance for a while before returning. Compared to artificial respiration, he felt that his situation was more like that of a heroine who needed a contractual kiss to break a curse. However, unlike in fairy tales, he had a lot more 'princes' to choose from.

To be honest, Chen Xi, who already knew that her older brother had at least had romantic or quasi-romantic relationships with two girls, Xu Youwei and Shen Nianqiu, didn't have any childish thoughts like "My brother probably still has his first kiss, right?" or "Don't make your brother Qian laugh."

From this perspective, it seems like we could just call these two over and wake them up.

But on the other hand, since these two people have a high probability of having had this kind of experience, Chen Junqian didn't need to pretend to be drowning and needing artificial respiration. He could have just kissed her directly. So the other party's target was actually himself, who was sent away to get a towel from the beginning. After all, if Zhu Wenyun hadn't accidentally discovered his brother's hiding place, he should have seen this scene when he came back with the towel.

Seriously... do you really want to kiss yourself that badly?

Thinking of this, even though Chen Xi was usually aloof, she couldn't help but feel shy like a girl. And when she thought of the romantic scene between the two of them a dozen minutes ago, she felt her steps become heavier and her gaze began to wander.

After noticing Chen Xi's behavior, Zhu Wenyun, who had walked back with her, began to imagine the possible thought process behind Chen Xi's actions. Her thoughts were similar; after all, she and Chen Junqian had long since gone beyond kissing in their intimate relationship. So, Chen Junqian's performance of lying there so professionally with "I need CPR" written all over his face was obviously for his sister's benefit.

However, I feel like I'll still have to struggle with this for a while... But thinking about it, it makes sense. After all, it's my most important first kiss. Any girl would probably hesitate for a while, and this difference in action does determine the progress of our relationship.

After thinking about the three girls besides herself, Shen Nianqiu, and Xu Youwei, Zhu Wenyun felt that if they were all in the same situation, the first one to kiss would definitely be the girl who shouted, "Isn't this a classic romantic comedy plot?"

Therefore, the anime/manga genre, or rather, romantic comedy, is indeed a very effective tool. It's no wonder that even though the other party arrived last, they were still able to quickly find their unique niche and advantages.

But once you know it, it's no longer unique. That's what "borrowing" means. It's like when you're applying sunscreen in the afternoon, the person who most wants that experience and treatment doesn't get it.

As Zhu Wenyun was pondering this, she heard footsteps approaching from afar.

"Xiao Xi? Wen Jun? Ah—why is Qian Qian lying here?"

It was Lin Mu. It seemed he had just left this place, searched around, and then returned the way he came. He happened to see the two of them here, one lying flat on the ground. Startled, he dropped the handful of seashells he was holding onto the beach. He immediately squatted down next to Chen Junqian and reached out to touch his forehead.

"Qianqian? Qianqian? What's wrong?"

"Ahem, Mu Mu, don't worry too much, Jun Qian is fine."

As Chen Junqian's staunch ally, Zhu Wenyun was unlikely to directly reveal that he was faking sleep. So, after offering a word of comfort, she quickly pulled Mu Mu aside and gave a brief explanation.

"Eh? So, if that's the case, why didn't Wen Yun... give CPR?"

Because he had no idea about the true relationship between Chen Xi and Chen Junqian, after hearing Zhu Wenyun's explanation, Lin Mu thought that the latter's pretense of ignorance and sleep was for Zhu Wenyun's sake, so he subconsciously asked this question.

This left Zhu Wenyun in an awkward position.

It's fair to say that some people only need to lie there and be done with it, while a wingman like her has to consider much more.

As the saying goes, one lie leads to a thousand more. Since Chen Xi herself hadn't said anything, Zhu Wenyun naturally couldn't reveal their sibling relationship beforehand. So, she could only bite the bullet and answer with nine truths and one lie:

"Well, because this was a plan we made together, so we gathered material, yes, gathered material, since romance novels often have plots like this, like CPR or something."

"But Wenyun always did the research herself before, right? She would always say that and then call Qianqian to her house or go out to do all sorts of things together."

"Because this time, what's needed is a description from an observer's perspective."

Seemingly feeling that this reason was indeed insufficient, Zhu Wenyun added another sentence:

"Besides, Junqian and I have already tried it before."