Reincarnated as the Death Spider Queen, sacrificing Bibi Dong at the start

Just as he was unable to continue using those ruthless and underhanded tactics against Poseidon in the temple of Poseidon, he was now completely incapable of committing evil deeds in the face of the defenseless, weeping Hulena.

The reason he disguised himself as a ruthless madman was because, deep down, he despised dark schemes, betrayals, and deceptions more than anyone else. This aversion was so profound that he utterly loathed himself for being tainted by these things.

It was because he had spent so much time in the gutter that he was so afraid of clean things.

When Poseidon set aside her status as a divine representative and chose to place her trust in him; when Huliena rushed forward without hesitation, trying to shield him from the blinding light with her tender shoulders, all his pride in his cunning and his vicious schemes became utterly rendered useless.

He could go to any lengths against the Spirit Hall's self-proclaimed holy and angelic family, even more cruelly than a demon. Because the Qian family's hypocritical and nauseating light disgusted him, he could retaliate against such hypocrisy with violence without any psychological burden, becoming even more wicked than evil itself.

However, faced with Poseidon's stubborn purity and Huliena's spotless, innocent heart, he couldn't bring himself to do it.

He could use the most ruthless means to tear apart the mask of hypocrisy, but he didn't have the courage to personally destroy a true sense of purity and light.

Nan Feng slowly lowered his hand from his eyes and gently embraced Hu Liena, who was crying in his arms.

"Nana".

"teacher……"

"Don't cry, it looks bad."

"Um……"

Chapter 205 From Inequality

……

Nan Feng carried Hu Liena and flew all the way back to the Papal Palace, landing directly in the quiet courtyard of the Papal Palace.

In the courtyard, the enormous purple cocoon filled with the evil orca king still lay forlornly on the stone slab, ignored by everyone.

Clearly, Bibi Dong's anger hadn't subsided at all, and she didn't even care about the 100,000-year soul ring she had been dreaming of.

Nan Feng stood in the courtyard for a moment, then picked up Hu Liena and pushed open the palace gate.

As you enter the depths of the palace, in the dim light, Bibi Dong is lying on her side on a large, soft couch with her back to the outside.

The air pressure in the room was frighteningly low, exuding a chilling aura that kept strangers at bay.

Nan Feng stopped and gently placed Hu Liena on the ground, rubbed her head, and said softly, "Nana, go out and play by yourself for a while."

Hu Liena glanced at the Pope's teacher, who had his back to her, then at Nan Feng, nodded obediently, and jogged out of the palace with small, quick steps, closing the door behind her.

As the palace doors closed, a deathly silence fell over the bedchamber.

Nan Feng walked to the bedside and sat down. Looking at Bibi Dong's stiff back, he remained silent for a moment before breaking the silence:

"I was a little emotional just now, I'm sorry."

Bibi Dong remained lying on her side, not moving a single hair, completely ignoring him.

Nan Feng sighed, his gaze falling on the luxurious cashmere carpet on the floor. He explained calmly, "I'm not in a good mood. It's not because I've been flirting with other women, nor because I've done anything to Poseidon. It's just... I suddenly had a pang of conscience that I sometimes have."

"Ah……"

A mocking laugh escaped from Bibi Dong, whose back was turned to him. She finally reacted, her voice dripping with icy sarcasm: "Conscience? You have such a thing?"

“I think I used to have it.” Nan Feng didn’t get angry; instead, he nodded in agreement. “Later, in order to survive, I dug it out myself. But even after it was dug out, if I occasionally encounter clean people or things that trigger it, I still experience a kind of phantom limb pain-like illusion.”

Bibi Dong snorted coldly, her tone becoming increasingly sharp and sarcastic: "Did that old woman Poseidon trigger your conscience? Or did she make your heart, which has been dead for ten thousand years... stir again?"

Nan Feng turned his head and looked at Bibi Dong's back, a complex emotion flashing in his eyes.

“If you’re asking this because you’re jealous…” Nan Feng didn’t choose to hide it, but said frankly, “Then I have to admit that I do have some feelings for Poseidon.”

The moment those words were spoken, the temperature in the entire palace seemed to plummet to freezing point.

"Shh!"

Bibi Dong's expression changed drastically, and she abruptly rolled out of bed. She grabbed Nan Feng by the collar, and with tremendous force, yanked him hard, slamming him onto the soft bed with a loud bang!

Her purplish-red eyes seemed to burn with a raging fire. Bibi Dong glared at the man she had pinned down, her voice trembling slightly with extreme anger:

"You actually dare to admit it?!"

Nan Feng was pinned to the bed, looking at Bibi Dong, who was standing close to him, breathing slightly with anger. He sighed helplessly, "I've always been someone who dares to admit what I've done. When have I ever been afraid to admit something? It's just that most of the time when I tell the truth, you don't believe me."

Bibi Dong stared intently at him, her chest heaving violently, wishing she could bite this bastard who openly admitted to having feelings for other women to his face.

Seeing her completely enraged expression, Nan Feng suppressed the helplessness in his eyes, and his gaze gradually became deep and sharp.

“Although what I’m about to say might make you angry again, or even make you lose control completely,” Nan Feng looked directly into Bibi Dong’s eyes, his voice becoming more serious than ever before, “I think we still have to talk about it. Keeping running away like this isn’t a solution.”

“Bibi Dong, if you get angry or jealous because I'm with other women or have feelings for other women…”

Nan Feng asked, enunciating each word clearly, "Have you ever thought that I might also feel angry because you have another man in your heart?"

"Or... do you think I'm not even worthy of being angry?"

Bibi Dong's expression suddenly changed, and the fingers pressing on Nan Feng's chest trembled slightly: "What do you mean?"

"Literal meaning."

Nan Feng looked at her calmly. "I've never really liked talking about heavy topics. Even when I have to, I always use a joking tone, or even a serious, threatening one. That way, I can mask a lot of my true emotions."

"But this might lead you to a deep misunderstanding of me. You think I don't care about anything."

Nan Feng's eyes became extremely aggressive: "But in reality, I am very jealous, and even more so, I am vengeful."

“Since I’ve been clinging to you, we’ve been through so much over the years. From scheming against each other to sharing hardships and wealth, to arguing fiercely in the ocean of our minds and even threatening to die together, we’ve weathered every storm.”

“But,” Nanfeng paused, “it seems we’ve never had a direct and honest conversation about matters of the heart.”

Nan Feng looked at Bibi Dong's slightly dazed eyes.

“It’s not because I don’t care. On the contrary, it’s precisely because I care that I always deliberately avoid this minefield.”

“I don’t think it’s necessary to bring up such heavy topics. The way we are now, bickering and scheming with each other every day, is actually quite interesting. There’s no need to reopen those wounds that would really pierce people’s hearts. I try my best to take care of your feelings, thinking about how you have been deeply hurt in the past, and I don’t want to upset you or hurt you.”

"But in your eyes? I always seem to be that cold-blooded, 100,000-year-old spider who only knows how to weigh the pros and cons."

Nan Feng looked at Bibi Dong and posed the most pressing, fatal question that had been weighing on his heart:

"What am I to you?"

"Is it a potential enemy that could turn on you at any moment? Or are you two grasshoppers tied together on a rope to survive? Or perhaps..."

"Am I just a substitute for Yu Xiaogang, someone you use in the dead of night to comfort yourself about that tragic past?!"

Bibi Dong's pupils suddenly contracted, and her lips turned slightly pale.

"I always force myself not to think about this problem. I feel that it is pointless to delve into it and will only cause more trouble."

Nan Feng took a deep breath. "But now it seems... that in your eyes, this matter is not important at all."

Bibi Dong opened her mouth, and a rare look of confusion and panic flashed in her purplish-red eyes, which had been burning with anger. She looked at Nan Feng, seemingly wanting to refute, but not knowing where to begin.

"Don't you think it's ridiculous that I'm saying all this nonsense today?"

Nan Feng looked into her eyes, his voice gradually lowering, "Bibi Dong, it seems that you can sense my emotions unilaterally through the soul blood pact between us, sense the struggles, helplessness, and even... my vulnerability in my heart."

"To be honest, if you didn't have this ability to perceive things in one direction, if you had no idea what I was thinking, I probably would have given up long ago."

A deep self-mockery flickered in Nan Feng's eyes. "I won't fantasize that you actually understand me, I won't get angry or sulk because of your every move, and I certainly won't feel wronged like this... like a pathetic loser."

"But what about me?"

"I can't sense anything from you! I have no idea what you're thinking or what you mean to me! I'm always afraid of you!"

"Because from the day we were tied together, our relationship has never been equal!"

Chapter 206 Neither Up Nor Down

……

"The further you go, the stronger you become, and the more control you gain. And me? I will become increasingly powerless in your presence. Even... when you truly reach the level of the Rakshasa God, what am I before your absolute divine power?"

Nan Feng closed his eyes and gave a bitter laugh. "Although our souls are intertwined, and although we appear to be one on the surface, we both know in our hearts that you are ultimately the main body of the Rakshasa God Test! And I am nothing more than a pendant residing in your martial soul, a parasite!"

"In the future, the one who truly holds the power of life and death, and wields absolute power, will be you, not me!"

Nan Feng reopened his eyes and stared intently at Bibi Dong. "But even in this extremely unequal relationship, where you could turn against me at any moment... I've always been trying my best to help you!"

"Whether it was scheming against Qian Xunji back then to help you complete that bloody revenge; or later helping you clear obstacles, seize power in the Spirit Hall, and even implementing those reforms that offended all the elders..."

"I've risked my life, I've done everything I can to help you! Bibi Dong, what do you think I've been doing all this for? Just for fun?!"

"I'm trying to please you!"

"In this unequal relationship where I could lose my life at any moment, I've been acting like a clown for the past few years, humbly and cautiously trying to please you!"

"But what do you think of me?"

Faced with Nan Feng's almost collapsing question, Bibi Dong loosened her grip on his collar slightly, her lips trembling, yet she still couldn't utter a sound.

"I don't know what you're really thinking. But at least, judging from your usual attitude..."

Nan Feng couldn't help but laugh. "You've always just treated me like a parasite you can just get rid of. Or to put it more precisely, to put it more bluntly... you've just treated me like your dog!"

"When you need my advice or to do the dirty work for you, you let me step up. When you don't need me or find me in your way, you tell me to get lost."

"They come when summoned, and leave when dismissed!"

"And what's most ridiculous is that you actually have a strange and extremely strong possessiveness towards this dog!" Nan Feng looked at her mockingly, "A possessiveness that comes and goes."

“When things are fine, you can ignore me and neglect me without a care in the world. But once I'm afraid that you'll abandon me at any moment, and in order to find a way to survive, I choose to ‘wag my tail’ to Poseidon or other women... your damn possessiveness suddenly kicks in!”

“You rush over and yell at me, thinking I betrayed you. But as soon as I obediently run back and offer up my prey, you turn around and become cold and indifferent again, ignoring me completely.”

Nan Feng abruptly pushed away Bibi Dong's hand that was pressing on his chest, sat up, and looked directly into her eyes.

“Bibi Dong, so many years have passed, and you’ve still been the same.”

"But I'm not always full of energy."

"I can't always shamelessly run back to you and wag my tail. I'm not a real dog; my mind isn't as simple as a dog's!"

"My mind is complex, and I'm very sensitive. Any slightest perfunctory response or any cold detail from you will trigger countless thoughts and suspicions in me!"

"I admit I'm selfish. So there's absolutely no way I'd be a dog who can't live without you, Bibi Dong!"

Nan Feng took a deep breath, suppressing the surging emotions in his heart, and his tone returned to its icy tone.

"I believe I've always tried my best to respect you over the years. But what about you? Have you ever respected me? To be honest, I've never felt even a shred of it!"