His hand moved slightly, moving to the back of Hasumi Ryoya's waist, gently stroking her straight spine.
“Leah will not beg for mercy from me,” he said.
Really, really, really can't do it?
When Hasumi Ryoya heard this, she wanted to ask herself a question.
Large, moving hands, warm hands, gentle movements.
Really not?
It might have been possible, but the moment those words were spoken...
Ryota Hasumi knew that she absolutely could not beg for mercy.
"Ah, um, I won't." She lowered her head somewhat vaguely, then looked up again with a confused expression: "Then how can I make Hoshino like me?"
"What I know can only be used on stage..."
"How about I dance for Hoshino? Or perhaps perform a one-woman show? Or maybe—"
The hand that was touching her was withdrawn, and in the next moment after feeling a sense of emptiness, Hoshino Utsunomiya turned around and hugged Ryota Hasumi.
“Tell me about Leia’s past.” He whispered in Leia’s ear, “There’s no need to rush, no need to overdo it. I’ve been watching Leia’s efforts all along.”
This isn't exactly a comforting remark.
Hoshino Utsunomiya was indeed watching all along.
It all started when Hasumi Ryoga, with a hint of self-abandonment, admitted that she just wanted to attract attention, and when she mustered the courage to stand up and seek recognition.
He's been watching all along.
Although Baosheng Mag was quite clingy at first, because Mag really needed love, the feeling of being inseparable only lasted for the first few days. Later, he was gradually given more free time.
Before he fell in love with An An, he had been paying attention to Leia and Nanoha Kaori.
Even though they would consciously avoid her, Rhea would act as if she dared not approach.
But he will approach her.
That's why he's always been aware of Ryota Hasumi's positive side, her hard work, and her smiling face.
It's inevitable that they'll develop feelings for each other.
But it was still a little short.
Observing from afar is not enough; close-up understanding is necessary, as is understanding what is previously unknown so that Hasumi Ryoua can gain a clearer understanding of it.
The girl's past.
The so-called family of origin and past trauma.
Will it happen?
Reasons for having claustrophobia.
"...She's good at comforting people." Hasumi Ryoya muttered softly, but made no move to push Utsunomiya Hoshino away.
The feeling of being embraced...
By the way, on the day he died in the warehouse, he was actually hugging himself.
Although it's a little different from how we hug now.
The shadows that come to mind seem to have faded, yet they also seem less so now.
Yes, is it because time has diluted it?
Or is it that your sense of guilt isn't as strong as you thought?
Or perhaps...
Maybe, perhaps, probably.
The real reason is that the person in front of you really acted as if they didn't care or mind at all, and that they had truly forgiven you.
If you are redeemed, you are pulled out of the state of being burdened by guilt.
All that's left in my heart is liking, right?
"However, my past...?" Hasumi Ryoya asked, somewhat dazed.
There's not much to say about her past.
Compared to others, it is certainly a very insignificant thing.
But since Hoshino wants to know, she'll just try to recall it a little.
"They're probably just an ordinary family."
It seemed that the magic of the gaze was canceled when she was embraced.
Rather than forcing him to look directly at her, Ryota Hasumi instinctively chose to hug him the moment she sensed he was about to embrace her.
She held him close, her heads turned away, and rested her head on his shoulder. In Utsunomiya Hoshino's ear, Hasumi Ryoa poured out her past.
"Father, mother, and an older brother."
"Mainly the mother."
The other people are actually irrelevant.
"My mother became seriously ill when I was young."
A pure white hospital bed, a ward filled with the strong smell of disinfectant, nurses walking around, and IV drips hanging high in the air.
As a child, Ryota Hasumi probably didn't know how serious her illness was.
Just to say...
“From that time on, my mother stopped talking to people.”
To be taciturn, or to remain silent?
It's like they've closed themselves off emotionally.
"He doesn't talk to anyone, nor does he look directly at anyone. His gaze just wanders, as if he's always looking into the distance. It's a very... ethereal feeling."
It seems that all we can say is nothingness, nothingness, indifference, and a lack of focus.
Ryota Hasumi relaxed a little and began to cling to Hoshino Utsunomiya.
It's not really hanging, after all, she's quite tall.
To be precise, it's based on.
Leaning against each other, nestled together, whispering softly.
“At that age, I cared about and needed maternal love the most.” Ryota Hasumi couldn’t help but smile.
She lowered her head again and sighed: "But a mother like that obviously won't give me any love, or even look at me properly."
The child who needs maternal love the most is not receiving it.
"I tried my best."
Mustering up the courage, wanting to act like a little adult, I approached the bedside and confidently said that I would go and tell them.
“‘Leah will protect Mom,’ ‘I will definitely cure Mom’s illness,’ ‘Leave it to me,’”
Looking back now, it's only funny to think that such a small person could say something like that.
Of course, the laughter wasn't necessarily malicious; it just meant that her words at the time lacked any persuasiveness and couldn't truly give her mother any strength.
This is something she can understand now.
It's no wonder the mother didn't respond.
Hasumi Ryoya never blamed her mother.
She only hated her own powerlessness.
“My mother still hasn’t seen me.” Biting her lower lip slightly, Ryota Hasumi took a deep breath: “But, but there will be one day, just one day.”
"Perhaps it's a coincidence, or perhaps it's just a misunderstanding on my part, but at least in my memory..."
"That day, my mother looked at the television."
Was there any sparkle in my mother's eyes? Was she focused, or was her gaze simply, just casually, fixed on the television?
Ryota Hasumi was unaware of this.
but.
"The images on the television were reflected in my mother's eyes, as if she were watching them."
It will become a lifeline, it will become hope.
This is the scene.
"After all, I've run out of options." With a slightly relieved smile, Hasumi Ryoya hugged Utsunomiya Hoshino tighter.
"If I hadn't believed that my mother would watch TV and watch the stage play that was being broadcast on TV at the time."
"I have to accept the reality that no matter what I do, my mother won't care about me."
It was simply because it was a stage play that was being broadcast at the time.
If it were an animated film, she might become a voice actress or an illustrator; if it were an idol drama, she might become an actress or an idol; if it were a news program, she might become a reporter.
But what was being broadcast at the time was a stage play.
"So I joined the theater troupe with the goal of becoming a stage actor."
Hasumi Ryoya breathed a sigh of relief.
Having said that, things became much clearer. As she reflected on it, she felt much more at ease.
But it's still something that should be said.
"I must attract more attention, I must stand in the center of the stage, I must be the protagonist of the stage."
"It seems that only in this way can my mother see me at first glance when watching a stage play, and keep looking at me."
An extremely clumsy idea, a stubborn obsession.
“But that idea was wrong after all.” Hasumi Ryoya sighed softly, “No matter what I do, no matter how hard I try.”
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