Why are you always thinking about dating me?

“I thought… you still wouldn’t have the courage to ask me for help, but I had no choice. If you don’t even want others to lend a helping hand, then I can’t help you either. So I’m glad you still called me.”

"Were you just on a date with Luo Shuishui...? Was I...?"

"That doesn't matter, does it? No matter what I'm doing, I'll always be here at this time." As Lin An said this, he gently held her hand; some appropriate physical contact can give the other person strength.

"Did you often feel frustrated and lost before, so you wanted to do something to fill the void?" Lin An looked into her eyes and spoke gently.

Su Yuejin nodded gently.

"But there's something that can be changed, isn't there? Are you feeling better now?"

“Okay…much better.” Su Yuejin answered slowly, and Lin An gently kneaded her palm. “Then smile for me first.”

Su Yuejin tried hard to force a smile, and although it was somewhat forced, it was still a smile.

Her emotions came quickly, but they also faded just as fast, as if what she had just experienced was just a dream. In the dream, she felt inexplicably empty, lonely, restless, and uneasy. Nothing could cool her emotions down until he appeared in front of her.

"What do you want now?" Lin An asked her.

“I want… Lin An.”

"Then wait for me to go downstairs and buy something first."

“I don’t need…that kind of thing.” She said this, but Lin An looked helplessly into her eyes, remained silent for a while, and then smiled helplessly.

"This will not be repeated."

....................................

He helped Su Yuejin put on her clothes. Su Yuejin sat on the edge of the bed, swinging her slender legs. Lin An gently held her hand. Su Yuejin's cheeks were still a little flushed, but she seemed a little confused and empty.

"I think I understand why you're upset, Su Yuejin."

Lin An turned his head, looked into Su Yuejin's eyes, and then gently hugged her.

Su Yuejin nestled obediently in his arms.

"Actually, you don't need to think too much. Modern people, under pressure, all have some distorted symptoms, but they will gradually heal themselves. This is just what you are experiencing at this stage. You don't need to suffer because of it. You will get better slowly."

"You didn't do anything wrong, but being happy is the most important thing. Everything is slowly getting better. See, it's getting better very quickly, isn't it?"

"Because...you came, Lin An."

“I am not an all-knowing and all-powerful monster. I dare not say that I can take over your life, but I will be with you now. You don’t need to worry about being alone. Just think of it that way.”

"If you want to drink, let's do it next time. I'll go with you next time... If you're going to drink outside, you'd better invite me along, otherwise I'll get angry."

Lin An sighed softly and turned her head. "You really are a wonderful girl, Su Yuejin."

"Why... did you suddenly praise me?"

"Because you are pretty and obedient, because your childishness is also cute, and you are very useful."

The last sentence might not seem like a compliment, but for Su Yuejin, it was.

"Then, will you... be unable to live without me?"

“I don’t know… but I still want to help you. Your anxiety comes and goes quickly, but you need to stay clear-headed and not let your emotions control you. If you can’t do it yourself, just call me… I don’t think it will be that frequent, right?”

“Occasionally, once or twice a month,” she said.

"That's just a small matter. I also have to withdraw into myself for a day or two every month. Everyone is the same. It's just that you're not allowed to play with knives or anything like that anymore. If you do, I'd rather give you a good spanking."

Hearing him say that, Su Yuejin's body trembled slightly, and her legs trembled uncomfortably.

“Next time, if you want, I can play some games with you that you’d like to try, but I don’t want you to become a masochist, Su Yuejin.”

"Although everyone has some sadistic or masochistic tendencies to some extent, if left unchecked, they can become distorted to the point of pathological depravity. So, Su Yuejin, you have to take good care of yourself."

Su Yuejin listened obediently, feeling his gentle voice pour into her ears, making her world seem to become clear all at once.

Even though it was pouring rain outside the window.

“I am still… Lin An.”

"Whatever you want."

"Wait for me... I need to get dressed! Humph!"

She seemed to have regained her energy, especially when doing this kind of thing. Lin An looked at her back and a slight sense of melancholy appeared on his face.

He didn't say anything like, "I'll leave you once you're better." If he really said that, Su Yuejin wouldn't be able to get better, because it would become a form of psychological suggestion.

Under the pressure of a distorted society, everyone has some psychological problems to some extent. No one can save anyone else; people can only save themselves. Since she has chosen to step into this vortex, Lin An hopes to guide Su Yuejin to control her emotions and slowly extricate herself.

Before that... let's just consider him a pushover. Anyway, Su Yuejin's reciprocation of love will make him feel warm.

Su Yuejin changed into a pair of black stockings and came back with her hands behind her back. Her cheeks were flushed, but her eyes were clear, not like they were flickering with the flames of desire. This was good. It was better than the long-term emptiness and loneliness that did not change with time or environment, and the emptiness that filled her heart. This extreme emptiness and loneliness turned into physical excitement and was eroded by desire.

Her voice was soft, and her cheeks were slightly shy, as if this was her true self, rather than the kitten who was occasionally fierce but mostly clingy.

....................................

In the middle of the night, the torrential rain outside the window pounded against the glass. Su Yuejin huddled in Lin An's arms, where he held her tightly.

Su Yuejin didn't take the initiative to tell Lin An the reason for her emotions, because Lin An must have guessed it all... It was like a dream, that someone could subtly perceive your loneliness and loss from just a few words.

He understands your fickleness, he understands your sudden confusion and emptiness, and he gives you love, even if it is false.

“Lin An…”

"Ok?"

"I'd do anything for you."

These were seemingly random words that suddenly came out of her mouth. Her eyes sparkled with an impulsive, adventurous light, but Lin An simply reached out and ruffled her hair.

"Just spend time with me, just be well, I don't need you to do anything for me."

She stuck out her tongue and gently licked his chest, as if she were really a cat or a puppy.

Lin An didn't speak. After a short while, he brushed Su Yuejin's hair aside, lowered his head, and gently kissed her forehead. Su Yuejin looked up, her voice gentle yet timid, "Am I sick, Lin An?"

"No." Lin An shook his head.

"Thank you for saving me... Lin An."

Lin An simply pinched her cheek, but Su Yuejin reached out and gently stroked his cheek, saying, "I want to play some more."

"..."

........................

Lin An forgot what time he fell asleep, only remembering that it was probably when Su Yuejin was tired? So tired and heavy, she leaned against him and told him stories about her past. They were all very simple: she had very few friends, pitifully few; a long and long period of loneliness; her parents' indifference; their arguments; the solitude of living alone; how she comforted herself when she was sad; when she learned to smoke; when she started drinking…

Lin Andu listened quietly until Su Yuejin fell asleep while talking. He vaguely remembered that when she talked about meeting Lin Andu, the corners of the girl's lips curled up, her voice grew softer and softer, and she slowly drifted off to sleep.

----------

P.S.: Just enjoy the above and don't take it too seriously.

Chapter Seventy-Five: Confession Leads to Leniency

Lin An had vaguely sensed that Su Yuejin's personality was somewhat on the verge of being crazy and chaotic, and now it seemed that this was indeed the case.

He had a premonition that Su Yuejin's love might last longer than Lin An had imagined. In a way, this was not a good thing. As he predicted, Su Yuejin's mental state would occasionally become so depressed that she could not control herself and could only relieve it by self-harm.

Actually, this kind of illness is not that serious. Although it has become part of her personality and cannot be cured, it can at least make her gradually calm down. He did not want to get into this vortex at first.

Because at this moment, he could easily detach himself. If he hadn't come tonight, Su Yuejin might not have come to see him again tomorrow. It really was that real, a strange emotion... She was an adventurer, but she couldn't handle interpersonal relationships. She was crazy and sincere, absolutely devoted yet chaotic and uncontrollable.

But when she experiences loneliness again and discovers that nothing has changed, her love will fade.

But most of the time, when she was gentle, she was still bright and lovely, making people want to love her. Lin An looked at her sleeping profile, the moonlight falling from the window. Xu Qinghuan didn't send him a message to ask, which meant she acquiesced, acquiescing no matter what happened.

Lin An was also a little tired. He could hear all the things Su Yuejin had been rambling on about earlier, and he remembered them all very clearly. So he just sighed softly, closed his eyes, and prepared to go to sleep.

Silent all night.

..............................

The next morning, when Lin An woke up, Su Yuejin was probably already awake, but she was snuggling in his arms, unwilling to break free. She seemed to be counting his eyelashes, and he didn't know how many she had counted.

"You're awake." The girl's voice was sweet.

"Yes... I'm a little tired." Lin An let go of her arm, looked at her gentle and beautiful face, and said it as if helplessly. Su Yuejin laughed happily, like a little fox.

"Alright, it's time to get up."

"No." Su Yuejin wasn't so obedient; she rolled over and pinned him down. "I want it in the morning too."

"I do not want it."

"I won't listen to you." She said this, humming twice, but seeing Lin An's serious gaze, she felt a little wronged and obediently rolled off him. "Okay, okay... then, then next time!"

Lin An got out of bed. He didn't mention Su Yuejin's condition last night because there was no need. She was at least fine and normal now, unlike last night. So mentioning it would only make her sad.

Lin An glanced under the bed at the torn black stockings, the strange bunny girl outfit she was wearing, and some scattered crumpled pieces of paper. Lin An sighed and rubbed his forehead, while Su Yuejin seemed quite satisfied.

Although she is currently completely naked.

"What did you and Luo Shuishui do last night?" she asked.

"I went to accompany her to singing practice. I have a bad feeling. I owe her a favor, and I might be used as a tool from now on." Lin An muttered to himself, then got dressed, stood up, and opened Su Yuejin's wardrobe. "So, Miss Su Yuejin, what do you want to wear today?"

"Please let me put it on, I have no strength left."

"I didn't see any signs of you being weak last night." Lin An opened the wardrobe, randomly picked out a pink JK uniform and tossed it to her, along with underwear. Su Yuejin said she was going to take a shower first and ran into the bathroom.

Feeling slightly uncomfortable, Lin An looked on helplessly. Since the curtains in her room were all drawn, he boiled a kettle of water, went downstairs, and went to the pharmacy not far away to get emergency contraceptive pills. When he came back, Su Yuejin was calling his name.

Lin An opened the bathroom door, poured a glass of warm water, and walked to her side.

“I thought you had left.” Su Yuejin looked into his eyes.

"It's not that bad. Go take a shower first, I'll wait for you."

He went out again, and Su Yuejin quickly ran out again, this time dressed and wearing pink slippers. Lin An handed her a water glass and a small pill.

"Will it be bitter?" she asked.

"...How would I know if I haven't taken it?" Lin An's lips twitched slightly. Su Yuejin looked at the small pill, then into Lin An's eyes. "Can I not take it?"

"You can get pregnant if you don't take the medicine."

"If I had a baby, would you love me?"

"...What the hell are you?"