American comics: The off-the-charts random transformation

We have to use our brains, we have to think! Right, Cyborg said the source of this world's apocalypse is a clone of Superman, so let's summon a character who can deal with the clone Superman.

Tian Xiaoban said, "Yes, yes, yes! I need to summon some help right now! Give me someone who can deal with Superman! Someone who can definitely make Superman obey!"

A string of characters flashed through his mind: Trigon, Brainiac, Darkseid, Louise Lane...

……

A flash of white light, and Lois from a parallel universe appeared here, looking completely bewildered. She stared at the mountain of food in front of her, and then immediately saw Superman Clark in the middle of it, looking just as bewildered.

She avoided the food and approached Superman with a panicked expression: "Superman? You... how... where is this? Why am I here?"

When Superman saw the person brought by the light, he was completely stunned. He stammered out the person's name:

"Lulu...Louise?"

In this world, Lois Lane died two years ago, killed by a group of cloned Superman. Back then, Lois, camera in hand, went to interview them, and these clones, caught in a revenge program, unhesitatingly blasted her with a heat ray. Tragically, Superman couldn't kill them; he could only harbor his hatred silently.

Louise called out again, "Superman!"

Superman snapped out of his daze and replied with tears in his eyes, "Louise! It really is you! I'm not dreaming!"

Just as the two were about to kiss each other, Tian Xiaoban snapped his fingers and teleported Louise away again.

Superman's search was in vain; his beloved suddenly disappeared again, causing his romantic mind, which had just been awakened by memories, to almost shut down.

Tian Xiaoban muttered to herself from the side:

"Damn it, I didn't ask her to come and perform a long-distance relationship for us audience members. This is the kind of long-distance relationship where people are separated by an entire world!"

I want a character who can deal with the clone Superman, the really strong Lois! Not this ordinary Lois who turns Superman into a love-struck fool!

"Hey, you better be reliable, you 'Tucao Energy' guy!"

[Complaint Energy +2500]

"No way, only this much!"

The energy wasn't enough to summon anything more.

"Then completely renovate this space!"

This time, the energy seemed to have an outlet, rapidly filling the space of the dam and constantly expanding it, widening the space by two thousand meters in the blink of an eye!

This is a distortion of space; it does not change the external dam.

The place suddenly felt empty, making those who had just crawled out of the pile of food feel like they were dreaming. Yes, a beautiful dream.

Once all the吐槽 (tu cao, meaning to complain or criticize) energy was used up, Tian Xiaoban didn't hesitate to stuff the吐槽 energy microphone into her four-dimensional pocket.

"This thing is indeed dangerous. Just like the trolls said, it requires training to master it perfectly."

Randomly criticizing others can easily get out of control!

……

This familiar yet unfamiliar place changed several times in just a few minutes, and Superman's eyes were fixed on Tian Xiaoban.

For ordinary people who believe in science, what just happened seemed a bit too surreal. When they tried to explain it using scientific methods, no one could help but twitch their lips in disbelief.

"Why are you all looking at me like that?" Tian Xiaoban asked innocently, pointing at the food. "Eat up, this is all for you. If you're hungry, eat up. I'm not going to feed you."

Superman's eyes were bloodshot. Don't get me wrong, he wasn't trying to use the heat ray. He had just seen Lois Lane and was a little teary-eyed. The redness in his eyes was due to bloodshot eyes.

"How did you do that? Louise, and all of this?"

"Use the wishing machine? As long as there's enough energy, any wish can come true." Tian Xiaoban thought to herself: If I just tell them to use吐槽 (tu cao, a Chinese internet slang term for complaining/criticizing) energy, wouldn't that seem a bit low-class?

"Wishing Machine!!!" ×N

This word seemed to have flipped a chain reaction, and everyone rushed over and surrounded Tian Xiaoban.

"Can you really make a wish?"

"Can I take it out and have a look? I was quite far away just now and didn't see the wishing machine."

"..."

These are people tormented by the apocalypse, harboring countless wishes they long to fulfill. With the opportunity right before them, how could they not be tempted?

But they remembered one thing wrong.

Tian Xiaoban doesn't have a superhuman temper like Superman, and she struggles with this group of complete strangers who are excessively enthusiastic.

"Don't get too close to me, it's dangerous!"

But they won't give up the chance to get a wishing machine so easily.

"Sigh, I shouldn't have tried to reason with people who are caught up in desires. You don't deserve to listen."

"Group Imprisonment!" (Group Imprisonment)

Tian Xiaoban used the irony magic that she hadn't used in a long time. In the next instant, everyone present was frozen in place by an invisible force.

This also included Superman, who found himself as if he were being approached by Kryptonite, his entire body feeling as if it were being crushed by a mountain, unable to move.

With just a few words and a wave of the hand, such incredible effects were achieved. Superman said uncertainly, "This is... magic?"

Although her body couldn't move, her mind and mouth weren't frozen in place. Everyone stared at Tian Xiaoban in shock—a magician! There really was magic!

"Could it be that Louise just now was created by magic? Was she real or an imposter?"

Tian Xiaoban rolled her eyes: "Wake up, this isn't the time for love-struck people! That Louise is real, but she's Louise from a parallel universe. She likes the Superman from her universe, not you."

Superman heard him clearly this time and thought rationally: "Parallel universes?...Okay, I understand."

Tian Xiaoban read aloud: "Release." [Release]

They regained their mobility, and this time the more than 2000 people behaved themselves. They didn't want to go against a magician, especially one who could freeze even Superman.

Seeing the awkward silence, Tian Xiaoban said to Superman:

"You guys eat your food."

Superman, let's go find the cloning machine and try to get a cloned Lex Luthor to come up with a solution.

If clones don't have the brains, then use a cloned Lex Luthor as a target for Superman clones.

This logic is also reasonable. If the cloned Lex Luthor does not have the same scientific intelligence as Lex Luthor, it means that the clone is not perfect. Therefore, it should be possible to successfully fool the cloned Superman with a clone of Lex Luthor.

Superman glanced at the others and nodded. It was safe enough here, and there was so much food that he could move about with peace of mind.

Cyborg, Shazam, and The Flash, who were just watching the show, each had their own roles to play.

Cyborg stayed behind to continue deciphering the data within LexCorp, Shazam wanted to go with Tian Xiaoban and Superman to help, and the Flash split into two groups, with half staying behind and the other half going with Tian Xiaoban.

That's the decision. Both sides are now safe, and the operation will begin immediately!

....................................

On the time-travel train, Tian Xiaoban had Crimson Knightmon activate satellite tracking to locate the superhuman clones. She also opened an online map to provide a live feed of them.

Superman was once again shocked by this technological means. He had no idea that technology could be used like this. Thinking about how he used his super hearing and super vision to avoid those clones, he felt the difference in skill.

I instantly recalled what I'd said a few minutes earlier: "So... your super brain is just for show?"

"Am I really that bad? If I had thought of this technology sooner, I could have saved so many more lives over the years!"

Tian Xiaoban comforted her, "Don't think like that. If you've become stupid, it's definitely not your fault. It's all the Flash's fault!"

The Flash in the car: ... Damn it, why are you pinning all the blame on me!

"Becoming stupid is also a form of suicide. If the world wants to continue, then even if you want to become stupid, you can't become stupid."

The super brain repeatedly tried to understand this sentence, and the implicit meaning behind it was that the world was about to be destroyed?

Superman turned his gaze to the Flash and his companions. They didn't seem like the kind of people who could destroy the world at all!

Tian Xiaoban changed the subject: "Speaking of which, what strategies do you have for dealing with those clones of you? What should we do if we encounter them head-on?"

Superman pondered for a moment: "Just be faster than them. Although they, like me, can become stronger by basking in the sun, they were born twenty years later than me. They can't catch up to my speed."

Also, they seem to have something inside them that blocks kryptonite; I can't kill them even with kryptonite bullets.

Tian Xiaoban became interested. He thought it would be a one-to-one replica of Superman, but Lex Luthor had given them an upgrade.

"Is that so? It seems Lex Luthor's creation is quite powerful; it's a decent kind of grunt."

Superman's lips twitched. "What do you mean? Are you saying I'm not even as good as a grunt?"

Shazam asked curiously, "Have you ever tried magic? I remember Superman getting knocked out by magical lightning."

This time it was Superman's turn to roll his eyes: "If I had magic, I wouldn't be struggling to survive with 2,324 people!"

The sheer power of Tian Xiaoban's magic was already impressive to Superman. If he possessed magic that could conjure food at will and expand space at will, he wouldn't have only saved so few people.

"Oh, okay." Shazam realized his question was too abstract and scratched his head awkwardly.

……

The train bypassed the area where Superman clones were distributed and found the cemetery at the approximate location given by Superman.

Superman buried Lex Luthor here; he dug the grave himself.

With his X-ray vision activated, Superman easily located Lex Luthor's remains, walked over to them, reached into the ground, and pulled the coffin out.

"I never thought we'd meet again."

Superman, with a complicated expression, was just about to move the coffin onto the train.

Tian Xiaoban took out the Digimon device he was using as storage space, put the coffin into the space, and then threw the Digimon device to Superman.

"This is space technology; the coffin has already entered this thing's space. I don't want to put a coffin in the train; that's very unlucky. You can have that thing; it will also make it easier for you to transport supplies in the future."

Superman thanked him earnestly: "Thank you."

"Get in the car, we're going to find the cloning machine now. Oh, by the way, you still haven't told me where it is."

Superman pointed to a location on the virtual map, not far from here, but there were ten Superman clones wandering around nearby.

"It's in Lex Luthor's corporate laboratory, a place that was converted from a Kryptonian warship's nursery. This entire complex of buildings is the Kryptonian warship."

Tian Xiaoban immediately thought about how difficult it would be to get this thing.

"Damn... does that mean we can't move it?"

“That’s right. The warship’s nursery cannot be cut apart, and its energy and various adaptation technologies are all bound to the Kryptonian warship’s energy system. It cannot be operated using Earth’s existing technology.”

Looking at the map, Tian Xiaoban instructed, "Flash, you guys go and distract those people! Superman and I will go clone Lex Luthor, and Shazam will stay on the train, ready to provide support at any time."