Konoha Drunkard

321. Perfect grand-disciple's brush is beautiful.

The Yellow Flash of Konoha ended the war with the Raikage in a one-on-one duel. In the end, the Yellow Flash of Konoha narrowly defeated the Fourth Raikage with a ninjutsu with a ridiculously long name. The Fourth Raikage then announced peace talks with Konoha on behalf of Kumogakure.

When the Raikage announced the peace talks, the news spread throughout the ninja world. The ninja world's journalists were quite competent; unless it was a top-secret matter, they would receive the news the next day. It's hard to imagine how many spies these journalists had planted in the various villages; sometimes they received the news even faster than the ninja villages themselves.

The battle in the Land of Lightning has ended, and the happiest person is Hiruzen Sarutobi. Konoha has once again successfully defeated its opponents by taking on several opponents under his leadership. On that day, he suddenly passed away, and now he can hold his head high and boast to the two leaders of Konoha in the underworld. In my decades-long career as Hokage, I led Konoha to victory against four opponents twice, and I discovered all kinds of outstanding talents for Konoha.

Jiraiya, the best mentor in the ninja world; Orochimaru, the great scientist and biologist; Minato Namikaze, the flamboyant yellow flash; he discovered them all, and even two of their grandsons' four divine weapons were given to them by him.

Every time he thought about these things, Hiruzen Sarutobi would let out lewd laughs. The few ANBU members hiding in the shadows would tense up every time they heard his laughter. Danzo was still in bed; what if the Hokage summoned them? Should they refuse...?

"Let's get back to the point. I plan to make Minato the Fourth Hokage. You guys should have no objections now, right?" Hiruzen Sarutobi looked at his two companions smugly. "Look at my perfect grand-disciple. He's really boosted my reputation. He even won a battle against the Fourth Raikage."

"The water gate was well done this time, I have no objection. Young people should definitely be given a chance."

Koharu Utatane didn't have any objections. To her, the Hokage wasn't as important as her godson, the super genius Shisui! What made her a little unhappy was that after the events in the Land of Water were over, her godson would be going to receive instruction from Fugaku Uchiha, which would mean that the two of them would have much less time together.

"I have no objection either."

Although Minato Homura, the soy sauce guest, was a bit rigid, he did a really good job this time, ending the war in the Land of Lightning with zero casualties. He couldn't find a reason to refuse his friend's suggestion again.

"Then after the war ends, we'll propose it to the Daimyo. Shanks has also sent word that the Water Country is starting to retreat. Only the Wind Country battlefield remains. Minato, continue leading men to the Wind Country battlefield to assist Orochimaru in ending the war there. The ninja world should be able to return to peace." Hiruzen Sarutobi said excitedly. He had originally planned to have his perfect grand-disciple go to the Water Country to boost his reputation, but Shanks, that bastard, had led him astray. The two leaders of the Mist Ninja were his acquaintances, and as the saying goes, "Don't kill strangers, but don't kill acquaintances," so he felt embarrassed to let them boost his perfect grand-disciple's reputation. Fortunately, there was still the Wind Country to boost his reputation, and with his propaganda efforts in the village, it wouldn't be a problem to raise his name a bit.

Hiruzen Sarutobi was just a little sorry for his perfect disciple Orochimaru. His original plan was for Orochimaru to serve as Hokage for ten years before stepping down to Minato, thus avoiding the problem of Minato being young and inexperienced. But his perfect disciple was doing something all day long. Not only did he not want to be Hokage, but he was also becoming more and more gloomy.

........

"boom!"

On the battlefield of the Land of Wind, Tsunade was once again giving Nawaki her usual beatings. After hearing the news that Minato had single-handedly defeated the new Raikage, Tsunade became increasingly unhappy looking at Nawaki, especially since he was still practicing the basic Three-Sword Style techniques her great-grandfather had taught her. Tsunade really wanted to beat him to death. Both had blond hair, were about the same age, yet one had mastered her great-grandfather's Flying Thunder God Technique with dazzling flair, while the other was still practicing the basics of the Three-Sword Style. Who was the true descendant of the Senju clan?! The other guy was almost Hokage, while this guy was still dreaming of becoming Hokage...

"Sis, can you tell me what happened this time?" Rope Tree said despairingly, rubbing the large bump on her head.

"Nothing, I'm just in a bad mood today and want to find someone to beat up." Tsunade looked at him with an air of domineering confidence.

Nawaki immediately wilted under Tsunade's gaze. He'd been getting beaten up for no reason for so many years, and he was used to it. He could only lament his painful life when no one was around.

"Minato defeated the Fourth Raikage in a one-on-one duel in the Land of Lightning, and the Raikage, in accordance with the bet, announced a peace agreement. The old man is planning to send him here to boost his reputation. Don't you have any thoughts on this? Minato is a year or two younger than you." Tsunade said, looking at her idiot brother.

"What are you thinking? Minato's so fierce, it's good that he came here to help sooner rather than later. I've killed too many people these past two years, I'm getting a bit tired of it." Nawaki said, rubbing his large bag. Before he'd been on the battlefield, he'd longed to fight and protect the village, but after two years of fighting, the sight of red liquid now made him nauseous and want to end this damned war as soon as possible. As for Tsunade's worries about feeling wronged, envious, or jealous, Nawaki didn't have any of that. In his mind, everyone should have a dream, whether they can achieve it is up to fate, and his lack of talent was nobody's fault but his own. Whoever is capable should step up.

Tsunade breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that Nawaki's nonchalant attitude was genuine. She was worried that her younger brother might do something rash when he saw that Minato, who was the same age as him, was already preparing to become Hokage.

Nawaki had a carefree childhood, protected by Shanks and Tsunade, two powerful figures in the Hokage hierarchy. Having spent so much time with Hiruzen Sarutobi, he knew the hardships of being Hokage, so deep down he resisted the position. After all, being Hokage was just a title; there was no need to take it seriously...

"I heard that Uncle was drinking with the Minazuki clan chief and the Hozuki clan chief in the Land of Water?" Nawaki looked at his older sister. He had been studying the Three-Sword Style recently, but the fact that Shanks had led the battlefield of the Land of Water astray had already spread throughout the ninja world the day after they started drinking and joking. The second largest village after Kumogakure had also been led astray by Konoha's Shanks, and turning the battlefield into a drinking ground had become Shanks's glorious achievement.

When Madara heard this news, he laughed maniacally, tears streaming down his face. Even the most brilliant plan would be ruined by an opponent like this who could smuggle everything in. Give this guy a few more years, and will the ninja world become a den of iniquity...?

"He's already driven the Mist Ninja in the Land of Water back. Once this is over, the war should end too." Tsunade was speechless. During World War II, they fought tooth and nail in the Land of Rain, while he was enjoying himself in the Land of Lightning. Now he's moved on to the Land of Water... Anyway, everyone in the ninja world knows that no one in his family is normal: two gamblers, one womanizer, and one alcoholic. The most normal one is Rin Uzumaki, who clearly has the talent of a double-crown stuntman but insists on being a housewife...

322. Are you my grandfather who has been missing for many years?

"Hey kid, you're awake?" In an underground entertainment center somewhere in the ninja world, Obito groggily opened his eyes and heard a boastful voice.

"Am I dead? Is this the underworld?" Obito looked around in confusion. Apart from a white, naked freak, there were stones everywhere.

"Kid, this isn't the underworld. Your body was crushed by a boulder, and it was Lord Madara who rescued you," the white object said.

"Does that mean I'm not dead yet? But what's wrong with my body?" Who wants to die if they can survive? His world, Rin, is still waiting for him. Obito was so excited that he tried to stand up, but his body felt like it had no bones and he couldn't muster any strength at all.

"This is my clone's body. Your body is rotten. If we don't give you a new body, you're really going to die," the white object said.

"What? My body's been changed?...Phew! At least I can still feel it." Obito felt a chill run down his spine when he realized he was in someone else's body. He touched the area between his legs with his left hand, and breathed a sigh of relief upon feeling the familiar sensation. It was much smaller than before, but as long as it felt right, that was enough. If he couldn't feel anything after changing bodies, he'd rather be dead. Was he really going to have to communicate with Rin from his world forever...?

"What are you doing? What still feels?" the white object asked, looking blankly at Obito.

"...This is a way for men to vent their emotions, didn't you know that?" Brother Obito said in confusion. This guy is really naive, he doesn't even understand this.

"Relieving? Why do I need to vent? Is this all?" The white object rubbed itself back and forth, mimicking Obito's movements, seemingly finding it quite comfortable...

"Uh...you're still young, you'll understand when you grow up. Where is this?" Obito didn't know how to explain either, as he was also self-taught back then.

"This is Lord Madara's hiding place... no, his residence. Now that you're awake, come with me to see Lord Madara. He's been waiting for you for a long time!" the white object said while rubbing.

"Ah. I should thank him too! But could you please stop? You can usually do this by yourself." Obito said, looking at the still-rubbing white object. He had to admit, despite its small size, its stamina was quite good.

"But it's quite comfortable, why can't we do it?" The white object rolled its eyes at him.

"..." Obito looked up at the sky. Should he call this guy stupid or naive? The problem is, which hand did you use to help me up?!

The two entered a dark room, where Obito saw an old man sitting in the middle who looked like he was about to die, with black tubes inserted into his body and connected to a huge object behind him.

"Grandpa, are you Lord Madara? Thank you for saving me." Even though he was being supported by the white object, Obito, one of Konoha's four model youths, still bowed politely to Lord Madara at a ninety-degree angle.

"Hehe, what a polite child. What are you doing, White Zetsu?" Madara looked at Obito, who was being supported by White Zetsu, and became more and more excited. The person he had been waiting for for decades had finally arrived. Regardless of the confusion he felt when he saw White Zetsu supporting Obito with one hand and rubbing his lower body with the other, the upright Madara had no idea what White Zetsu was doing.

"Oh! Lord Madara, Obito said this is a way for men to release their emotions, and it's actually quite comfortable. Oh! Lord Madara, you should try it." White Zetsu's hands just wouldn't stop, and he would occasionally let out a comfortable groan.

"..." Black Zetsu looked at White Zetsu's expression with a puzzled expression, and imitated White Zetsu by rubbing his lower body with one hand. If he wanted to vent his emotions, he had lived for so many years and it was time to vent them.

"..." Obito was horrified to see a black freak next to Madara mimicking the white object's movements. Who were these people? Even the old man in front didn't know this posture, and this old man didn't need to vent his anger... What if he died while venting his anger?

"Hmph! Don't do such useless things!" Although Grandpa Ban didn't know what the point of doing this was, his way of venting his anger was always to abuse others or be abused.

"Grandpa, have you always lived here? Where are your children?" Brother Obito forcefully changed the subject, as continuing to discuss that kind of topic was indecent.

"Haha, kid, if I said you were my child, would you believe me?" Old Man Madara looked at Obito and liked him more and more.

"Grandpa, don't joke around. My father died before I was even born, but my grandmother is about the same age as you. Could it be... that you are my grandfather who has been missing for many years?" Brother Daitu looked at this legendary grandfather in surprise.

As soon as Obito finished speaking, the white and black objects stopped what they were doing, staring in shock at Obito before looking at Madara. And you know what, the two really did look somewhat alike...

"......That's not what I meant. What I meant was...cough cough." Madara, suppressing his anger, couldn't even speak. If I had a grandson like you, I would have shot your father against the wall back then!

"Look me in the eyes." After forcing himself to calm down, Madara activated his Sharingan and looked at Obito.

"Sharingan! So you really are my grandfather!" Obito was completely convinced after seeing the Sharingan.

"You brat! I'm not your grandpa. My name is Uchiha Madara, haven't you heard of me? My name should still be in your textbooks!" Madara said arrogantly.

"...Sigh, so Grandpa, your name is Uchiha Madara! That's a nice name." Obito slammed his fist against his palm.

"...You don't know who I am?" This time it was Madara's turn to be confused. Could it be that he had really been away from the ninja world for so long that his legend had been eliminated by the times?

"Didn't you just say you were taking it? You're Uchiha Madara. Have you forgotten?" Obito looked at Madara nervously. Was Grandpa getting too old and forgetful? Maybe that's why he couldn't remember the way home.

"Didn't you ever attend classes at school? How can you not know who I am!" Madara felt Obito's gaze and could no longer control his anger. This guy, a member of the Uchiha clan, didn't even know his name, Madara!

"I'm a super genius from Konoha. I graduated when I was just over five years old. I've never read those useless books." Obito said proudly. Let alone reading books, Kame Saburo's world is nowhere near as interesting as his Rin's.

"..." Madara looked at Obito like he was seeing his beloved Hashirama Senju as a child—both were incredibly dense. And Obito, not only dense, seemed to have a small brain as well. Madara had talked to Obito for so long, but Obito still hadn't asked him the crucial question: why was he here...? Obito hadn't even given an opening, how was he supposed to start his story...?

323. Confident Obito

Looking at the shameless Obito, Madara couldn't understand where this brat got the confidence to call himself a super genius of Konoha. "If you hadn't met me," he thought, "you'd be meeting your long-lost grandfather by now. A super genius, my foot!"

"Grandpa, I have to rush back to the village. Everyone in the village thinks I'm dead. I have to go back right away." Brother Obito finally remembered his business. He hadn't seen his world for a long time, and he didn't know how heartbroken his world must be to think he was dead.

"Kid, I'll say it again, I'm not your grandfather. I call you a child because I'm considered a senior to your Uchiha clan, understand? Besides, you can't come back to Konoha yet. Don't you feel that your body hasn't adapted yet? Because of your newly transplanted body, you need to wait for a while to adapt. Otherwise, if your body causes any conflict with you, you'll still die." Madara felt it was better to be direct. This guy's brain capacity was too small to understand anything too profound.

"What can we do! The village is still at war! Teacher Minato and the others don't know I'm still alive, they must be heartbroken." Obito was anxious, tears welling up in his eyes.

"You've been unconscious for months. The Iwa ninja and Raikage have already declared a ceasefire, and the Kirigakure ninja have begun their retreat. Konoha's situation is much better than yours, and your teacher, Minato, is very likely to become the next Hokage soon. Now you should just focus on recovering, or you'll die on the road before you even see your girlfriend," Madara said calmly. His plan to weaken Konoha hadn't achieved the results he'd envisioned, but acquiring Obito Uchiha was still a pleasant surprise. He couldn't afford to let his future representative get into trouble. He'd been waiting for this for decades, and he didn't have another few decades to wait.

"But at least let me write them a letter, so they know I'm not dead," Obito said.

"Wouldn't it be better to give them a surprise after you've recovered from your injuries? Take Bai Zetsu back to heal, and once he's healed, you can take him back to Konoha." Madara gave Bai Zetsu a meaningful look.

"Oh, I'm so sorry to trouble you. I'm much better now and can go back by myself." Since this person wasn't his grandfather who had been missing for many years, and he had never heard of such a person in his clan, those people were definitely not good people. They were either traitors or cowards who faked their deaths on the battlefield and hid. How could he, a super genius of Konoha, possibly stay with such people? Wouldn't that leave a stain on his life?! Just like when Shanks forcibly took his picture back then, it was simply a disgrace.

Madara has seen more bridges than Obito has walked roads, and Obito's acting skills are really lacking, with distrust written all over his face. Madara, of course, understands his thoughts perfectly well, and throws him a genjutsu to quiet Obito down for a while.

"Lord Madara, this brat doesn't seem so easy to fool!" White Zetsu said, holding the sleeping Obito.

"I never intended to fool him. When he loses all hope in this world, he will come back to me. How is that little girl in Konoha?" Madara asked White Zetsu, looking at the sleeping Obito.

"That little girl is still in Konoha and shows no signs of leaving the village. Kakashi, on the other hand, does have some talent. He's already familiar with the Sharingan, although his chakra is draining very badly. Should we help Obito retrieve that eye?" White Zetsu said. Now that Shanks isn't in Konoha, his clones can come and go freely in the village, unlike before when Shanks was in Konoha, when no matter how many clones he sent, they would inexplicably faint.

"Hmph! No need. Someone without Uchiha blood is useless even if you give him the Mangekyou Sharingan. This is a critical time, there's no need to cause trouble. The Hatake clan has only had one son per generation for several generations. If something happens to him, Konoha will be on alert." Madara clearly disdained Kakashi's reputation as a genius of Konoha. The only person in Konoha who truly caught his eye was his die-hard fan, Shanks. The one who claimed to be the strongest Hokage in history was just a slogan.

"Lord Madara, the plans in the Land of Water are already in place. I'm worried that if that red-haired brat returns to Konoha, it will hinder our plans. Should we have White Zetsu forcibly bring her out?" Black Zetsu said with a gloomy expression. He felt a deep fear of Shanks, who was even more wicked than the reincarnation of Ashura, Hashirama Senju. In his thousands of years in the ninja world, he had never seen such a person. Not to mention his bizarre and powerful strength, his ability to lead the entire situation astray made him very uneasy.

"...Don't worry about that red-haired brat. Even if it doesn't work this time, I have ways to make Obito experience despair. However, the second method is a bit risky, so the best way is to let him see that little girl being killed with his own eyes." Every time Madara thought of that die-hard fan's smug face, the veins on his forehead would bulge.

.....

"Ah!"

Shanks, who was seeing off Minazuki Seiko and Hozuki's leader on the battlefield of the Land of Water, suddenly sneezed, spraying Jiraiya's face with the sneezes.

"Captain...it's only September, sneezing in this heat, could it be that you're getting old and your body can't handle it?" Jiraiya muttered, wiping the drool from his face.

"Pshaw! How could that be? Your captain can still fight for decades to come! Someone was definitely thinking about me just now, I just don't know who it was," Shanks said.

"Who else in the ninja world, besides your mother-in-law, would miss you?" said the small-sized Sky Cannon.

"boom!"

"Son-in-law, have you gotten too cocky just because you became the Grand Strategist? Remember, your grandpa is still your grandpa." Shanks gave the little rocket launcher a loving punch.

"...Captain, the Mist Ninja are gone too, shouldn't we go back as well?" Jiraiya said with a sympathetic look at the small rocket launcher lying on the ground.

"Of course I'm going back. Your old man gave you orders to stay here and guard until the war is truly over. After all, the Land of Water hasn't said they'd stop the war. Who can guarantee that the Mizukage won't send someone to ambush us?" Shanks said. Just from that violent sneeze, Shanks could guess who was thinking of him even with his eyes closed—of course, it was his idol, Madara!

"Alright! I'll go relax after the war is over, and not go back to Konoha yet," Jiraiya said.

"What? Minato is about to become Hokage, aren't you, as his teacher, going to give him a warm hug?" Shanks raised an eyebrow.

"Haha! I'll find him to celebrate when I get back. I've been a bit tired of staying in the village all these years. I'm going out to relax and maybe find some inspiration. I am the great writer, Jiraiya-sama!" Jiraiya, who was originally about to lament his life, became smug again after hearing Shanks's overpowered abilities. Just based on the fact that his disciple became Hokage, his talent for teaching disciples will always surpass Orochimaru's.

324. Even the water gate couldn't overshadow his brilliance.

On the battlefield of the Land of Wind, ever since Minato arrived, the Kazekage Rasa has been frowning every day. He already had a hard time dealing with Orochimaru alone, and now there's an even more shameless Minato Namikaze. How is he, the great mage, supposed to survive?

"Lord Kaizo, the other villages have all made peace, and Hiruzen Sarutobi has sent Minato Namikaze over here. They're going to have a final battle with us," Rasa said to Uncle Kaizo, who had aged considerably in the past two years.

"...If I'm not mistaken, the next Hokage should be Minato Namikaze. Hiruzen Sarutobi made him fight in three battlefields in order to secure his position. If things don't end in the Land of Water so quickly, I think he'll go there again." Uncle Kaizo was increasingly impressed by Hiruzen Sarutobi's shamelessness, having gone to such lengths to make his successor fight in three different maps in order to secure his position.

After hearing Uncle Kaizo's words, Rasa felt a pang of envy. Look how well Konoha was implementing this mentorship system! If his teacher were still alive, he wouldn't have ended up like Hiruzen Sarutobi, with no future prospects. However... if his teacher hadn't died, it seemed the position of Kazekage would have been completely out of his reach.

"Now that Minato Namikaze has arrived here, we have no chance of winning." Rasa sighed. They were both trying to farm reputation, but he saw that Minato Namikaze had filled the entire map, while his map was about to be cleared by someone else.