Konoha Drunkard

Snake shook his head regretfully. In his eyes, Itachi Uchiha's illness was like a curse. When he used Itachi's genes for research, he found that Itachi's genes were normal and did not seem to be sick at all. But Itachi was sick and was about to die. What is this if not a curse? In this situation, even changing bodies would not help. God made you die. This is unreasonable.

Disappointed, Shanks left Orochimaru's super research institute and wandered aimlessly through the streets of Konoha. It seemed that Itachi was beyond saving. If it were the Reincarnation Factor, it would be fine, but now Kishimoto was determined to give the second male lead a power-up. If Itachi didn't die, how could the second male lead awaken his Sharingan and transplant Itachi's eyes?

But......

That's not right!

He knew the pattern of awakening the Mangekyou Sharingan. It wasn't necessarily about killing one's family; it was just about experiencing extreme mental trauma. When Itachi awakened his Mangekyou Sharingan, his parents were still alive. He only awakened it because he thought Shisui was dead. The second male lead could use the same method without any problem. And even if he didn't awaken it now, given Kishimoto's usual style, he would still awaken it later when the Six Paths Elder appeared and gave him a power-up. Since the Six Paths Elder was already giving it to him, why would Kishimoto have his younger son die? He didn't seem this heartbroken over his older son... Could it be that this was also setting the stage for the second male lead's future plot?

Shanks got a headache from thinking about it more and more. He couldn't remember anything about what the future plot would be like. He was lucky if he could remember some of the key points.

.........

Kisame returned to the Akatsuki and immediately reported Itachi's situation to Nagato. After learning that Itachi was an undercover agent, Nagato and Nagato were both shocked. They didn't care whether Itachi was an undercover agent or not. After all, the only tailed beasts missing now were the Eight-Tails and the Nine-Tails. The Eight-Tails had disappeared, and they didn't know who the Nine-Tails was. Moreover, he planned to personally take down the last two tailed beasts. Although his subordinates were very powerful, it was said that they probably couldn't protect the last two tailed beasts with so many tails.

They were surprised; Konoha really went all out. To allow Itachi Uchiha to infiltrate, they'd arranged everything so meticulously—they were truly willing to invest heavily!

The two, who hadn't read much, suddenly realized they should spend more time reading.

767. Little Scorpion: I have money too!

"Nagato, only the Eight-Tails, Nine-Tails, and that new tailed beast from Kawagakure remain. Which one should we attack first?"

The wealthy Nan asked his friend, "If it were before, this wouldn't be a problem at all. Back then, our Akatsuki team was strong and well-equipped, with more than ten members of the Double Flower Red Sticks. Konoha was quite difficult to deal with, and we could send two more teams without any problem. But now it's different. Sasori of the Red Sand has disappeared. According to his analysis, he should have been held back and is now dead."

Deidara fared even worse; he was already covered in a shower of flowers, and there wasn't even a chance to collect his body.

Although Itachi Uchiha wasn't one of their own, he had still contributed to their organization. However, he was suffering from a terminal illness and was probably nearing his end lying in a Konoha hospital.

Now, the Akatsuki group only has two teams left: Kakuzu and Hidan, and Kisame and the masked man. It seems their peak has passed...

"...Let Kisame and the others go to Kawanin Village. I will personally go to Konoha later."

Nagato thought about it and decided it was better to deal with the uncertain tailed beasts from Kawagakure first. The Eight-Tails and Nine-Tails were already troublesome enough, and if Konoha's Shanks reacted later, Kawagakure would only cause more trouble. It was better to deal with them first.

If Shanks knew what Nagato was thinking, he'd definitely beg him to masturbate. He'd also like to see whether they wanted to stuff that artificial tailed beast-like mouth or its anus—it's a profound question...

.........

The Senju clan within Konoha.

"Damn it, I want a research institute like Orochimaru's too!"

This was the first time Little Scorpion had come to Shanks' house. Although they were neighbors, Little Scorpion had been staying at home playing with his toys ever since he came to Konoha. Since he was already a wooden figure, he didn't need to eat, so no one needed to bring him food. If it weren't for the knocking sounds coming from his house every day, the Uzumaki clan would have thought that no one was inside.

Today, Scorpion arrived filled with rage. The reason was simple: pure jealousy. Yes, even though he's practically a wooden puppet, the idea of ​​being emotionless is utter nonsense. Anyone with thoughts has feelings, and Scorpion never hides his emotions. This time was no exception. Orochimaru had visited him this morning; as former colleagues, a visit was normal. Having spent some time in Konoha, Scorpion had come to terms with things. For his beloved grandmother and the legacy Shanks had swindled from him, he was willing to die beside that bastard, making him mourn...

So it was no big deal for Orochimaru to come visit him. Moreover, as former colleagues, one pursued immortality and the other pursued eternity, so there was really no difference between them. At first, the two even had a very interesting conversation about a common topic. When Orochimaru invited him to his laboratory, he agreed.

But upon arriving at Orochimaru's laboratory, wow! An aura of extravagance washed over him. When Sasori stepped inside, he exclaimed, "Wow, this is exactly the same as that super-luxurious research institute in the Land of Rain!" The only difference was that the entrance was more understated, not as ostentatious as the one in the Land of Rain. But the facilities inside were identical. Sasori even praised Orochimaru's methods, managing to set up such a luxurious laboratory even after leaving the Land of Rain.

Orochimaru humbly said that he didn't do it; Shanks did it for him.

Who knew that after Orochimaru said those words, trouble would ensue. Sasori exploded with rage on the spot, returning to the Senju clan at a speed barely visible to the naked eye, and smashed open the gates of Shanks' house. He was furious! Back in the Land of Rain, it was one thing for Kakuzu to treat Orochimaru that way, since he was indeed short of money. Later, when Kakuzu collaborated with Orochimaru on drug development, Orochimaru's treatment improved significantly, and he could tolerate that, since it was what Orochimaru deserved.

But now Shanks, that bastard, has ripped off his family a lot, and apart from sending him small parts every day, he's completely expressionless. Meanwhile, after Orochimaru came back, Shanks built a research institute for Orochimaru that looks exactly like the one in the Land of Rain.

On what grounds?

I, Sasori of the Red Sand, am rich too!

Although he wasn't quite clear on the equivalent exchange value of money, he had a general idea of ​​how rich his family was. Ebizo had sent people to deliver money to this bastard more than once, and it had been going on for a long time. It wasn't too much for Ebizo to send so much money to build a huge Orochimaru-like research institute, was it?

“Yes, Grand Uncle! How can you be so biased? Brother Scorpion’s family gave so much money! Grand Aunt, look how stingy Grand Uncle is.”

Karin added insult to injury, saying that women really do forget their families once they have a man, and that's absolutely true. Damn, their relationship is complicated. From "Uncle Sasori" at the beginning to "Brother Sasori," will he become "Baby Sasori" in a few years...?

"Karin, aren't you afraid your aunt will beat you to a pulp? Stop being so obsessed, you won't find happiness..."

Shanks was exasperated by Karin's infatuated expression. If Karin weren't so dense, he'd absolutely love for her to flirt with him, even if it meant tying her up and taking her to her room...

The little scorpion is so beautiful, and Karin is quite good-looking too. Add to that the Senju Uzumaki bloodline and the other a super genius, and their offspring won't be inferior to Garp. If they continue this lineage for decades to come, my god! The Senju clan is on the verge of prosperity! They might even create a new race...

But now the situation is different. The little scorpion is like a wooden doll, not eating or sleeping. Although it has human emotions, its physical needs...

Garp's responsibilities have become even heavier; I wonder if it will break him...

"What are you saying, you old rascal? Scorpion is asking you a question."

Haruko-sama slapped him on the head, but in her heart, she didn't approve of Karin and Sasori having any connection. Being friends was fine, but anything more was out of the question. The Senju clan was already short of people, and her second uncle had specifically asked her to take good care of these children before he left...

“Hey! It’s not that I don’t want to build it for you, the key is that Konoha is different from other villages. In Konoha, the per capita housing shortage is extremely tight, and the population is increasing rapidly every year. It’s not easy to find an empty plot of land to build a research institute. Orochimaru bought that plot of land decades ago because of his significant contributions to Konoha and his sharp vision. Although he has been away from the village for more than ten years, he is still the owner of that land. Let alone building a research institute, if he had money, he could build a swimming pool and no one would care. I don’t have such a large plot of land to build a research institute for you.”

Shanks clapped his hands, turning his back to Scorpion and venting his frustrations. He'd have to be crazy to build another research institute for Scorpion; Orochimaru's institute had still wounded his heart, it was just too damn expensive! The cost of one research institute was enough to build another Senju clan... And what do you mean "your money"? That's Ebizo's salary for taking care of you! Isn't being a babysitter tiring...?

768. Familiar routine

It's a trick!

It's that familiar routine again!

Shanks had just finished confiding in Scorpion when Haruko caught a whiff of his familiar routine, but since there were juniors and outsiders present, she didn't expose him.

"Then go buy it now. Didn't Ebizo give you the money?"

Even though the little scorpion already knows that you have to pay for things, it's still so naive.

"Hey! Buying land isn't so easy these days. Do you think it's still like decades ago? Land in Konoha is more expensive than gold now. And that's not all. You have to pay taxes to buy land and build houses. There's land tax, building tax, occupancy tax, and so on. It adds up to more money than building an amusement park. It's not worth it. Just forget about it. Contentment is happiness. Don't be too competitive."

Shanks counted to the little scorpion as if coaxing a child, leaving the three people around him stunned, especially Karin, who was biased towards outsiders.

"Is it really that complicated? I didn't know that. Just yesterday, the Third Hokage had Yamato Jonin build a house."

"...Karin, shouldn't you be at work? You're so old and still a genin, don't you feel ashamed? Go to work. The Third Hokage couldn't distinguish between public and private matters and abused his power. How can I be like him? We are all good citizens."

Shanks was furious with her. She wasn't even married yet and she was already thinking about men. She was just like Big Mom in the past.

It's definitely better to have a son...

"My stomach hurts today, so I'm taking the day off."

Karin said nonchalantly.

"........."

Shanks was speechless. She was the princess of the Senju clan, a top-tier half-blood of the Senju and Uzumaki clans, and a little girl at that. She was the little princess of the sealing class. Who could refuse her leave if she wanted to? She could easily get away with it by acting cute and charming with the Uzumaki elders. Besides, she was more disciplined than her older brother, not arrogant, and even knew how to ask for leave... She was practically the good girl of the sealing class.

Garp has never known what taking leave is. In his words, if he weren't arrogant, who would know what he was worth...

That makes a lot of sense!

"Are you going to buy it or not? Give me an answer."

Seeing him dawdling, Little Scorpion's temper flared up again. He couldn't even do the smallest thing right, and he was supposed to be Konoha Red-Haired.

“It’s not a question of whether to buy or not, but a question of insufficient funds. Every now and then, Ebizo sends money and it’s all used to buy you toys. I have a family to support, where am I going to get that much money? Why don’t you write a letter to Ebizo and ask him to give me a raise?”

Shanks rubbed his hands together, revealing a sly grin. Although Grandma Chiyo had agreed to transfer her family business to Shanks so he could take good care of her grandson, Shanks later realized that Grandma Chiyo's entire fortune was in Sunagakure, while he was in Konoha. Aside from the gold dust, he couldn't take anything else. He was really at a huge loss. Luckily, Ebizo was kind enough to pay him a monthly salary, otherwise he would have truly lost out. He wanted to take advantage of the situation while he could, because who knew how many more years Ebizo would stay... When Ebizo kicked the bucket, all the benefits would go to those idiots in Sunagakure, and he would get nothing...

"Brother Scorpion, don't believe him, he's got money to burn!"

Just as Scorpion was about to make a move, Karin stabbed Shanks in the back again, and Scorpion immediately realized that he had almost been tricked again.

"...Garp!!! Take your sister away!"

Shanks covered his face and yelled at Garp's house, "Isn't he making money so that you traitors can live a better life... Now you've grown up and are trying to sabotage me."

"...Alright, enough already, how old are you to still be making such a fuss?"

Karin always cleverly tries to latch onto Haruko's coattails, and this time was no exception. Seeing Shanks' furious expression, she immediately gave Haruko a pitiful look, and Haruko, damn it, fell for it...

Since Haruko-sama had spoken, what could Shanks say? He could only grit his teeth and go to the construction company owner, Yamato, to build an amusement park near the Senju clan. Because Konoha was constantly expanding, the Senju clan, which was originally on the edge of the village, had become the center of the village, and the surrounding area was full of villagers. So, if they wanted to build an amusement park nearby, they would have to relocate the villagers to another place. This was a huge project. Fortunately, Shanks had a lot of influence. When the villagers heard that it was Shanks' request, and that he had even prepared houses for them and given each family ten kilograms of pork, and that the distance wasn't far, they agreed to move because of those ten kilograms of pork. The cost alone made Shanks bleed a lot.

The thought of Karin as a tiny scorpion sent chills down Shanks' spine. What a tragic fate! What would Hashirama Senju think if he knew his great-granddaughter had fallen for a wooden doll...?

Those who play with wood will ultimately be played by wood...

.........

Sunagakure Village.

"A letter from Konoha, the advisor of the Sea Pavilion."

A Sand Village ninja arrived at Ebizo's rather "low-key" home with a letter.

Ebizo opened the envelope and read through its contents quite carefully. A letter from Konoha must be from Shanks, after all, Sasori was there, and he was their only descendant, so they had to take it seriously.

Dear Uncle Haizang:

"Your eldest son is living the high life in Konoha! He's been demanding a huge amusement park built in this place where land is more expensive than gold. He threatened to commit suicide by swallowing feces if I didn't let him. For the sake of my friendship with Aunt Chiyo and for your sake, I disregarded my family's miserable existence and, with tears in my eyes, gritted my teeth and built the amusement park for him. Now my family is living on tree bark. You'd better watch out!"

"...Send someone to deliver the money to Konoha Red tomorrow, and this time give ten times more."

After reading the letter, Uncle Haizang magnanimously told his underling that although he didn't believe a single punctuation mark in Shanks' letter, he knew Shanks too well after knowing him for decades; this guy was definitely trying to swindle money again.

However, since they were the ones asking for a favor, and he was their only son, they had to accept it even if they knew they were being taken advantage of.

Since he's shed so much blood, Shanks has to earn that money back somehow. What does face matter when it comes to making a living?

So the day after the amusement park was built, I immediately wrote a long post of over a thousand words to Uncle Kaizo in Sunagakure. The gist of it was just two words: I want money!

However, Shanks hadn't really decided how much he wanted, so he vaguely added "you decide" at the end, thinking that Uncle Kaizo was so rich that he couldn't possibly spend it all, so he probably wouldn't be stingy.

769. The second male lead has finally seen the light.

Itachi still left.

The medical technology in the Naruto world is so distorted that there is no way to treat terminal illnesses. Itachi, who had been lying in bed for two months, eventually succumbed to his disease.

Unlike the original story, Itachi passed away peacefully this time, leaving behind nothing but a suicide note.

Shanks, holding the suicide note, gazed silently at Itachi's closed eyes. His thoughts drifted back to the first time he saw him; he was immediately drawn to the boy's gaze. The scene then shifted to Shanks teaching Itachi, a talented and hardworking boy who, even while working as a spy, never forgot to buy him alcohol...

"Find Sasuke and bring him back for a visit. This is what Itachi left for him."

Shanks handed a bottle containing an eye and a suicide note to Shisui, who was shedding tears. He quietly looked at Itachi, who seemed to be asleep. It wasn't that he was emotionless, but after so many years, he had experienced all kinds of life and death, and crying and wailing would just be nonsense.

This young man's life was truly tragic. At a young age, he strived for the rise of his family, and later, to prove his worth, he slaughtered his own clan. He had hoped that after the finale, he could return to his village and live a peaceful life, but before the finale even aired, he met his demise...

Shanks originally didn't want to take out Itachi's eyes, since they were the only thing his beloved disciple had left behind. However, considering that this was Itachi's last wish, he felt it wouldn't be right to disrespect him, so he reluctantly handed them over to Shisui to give to the second male lead.

The second male lead, Kuku, hasn't appeared since that day. He didn't even come to see his older brother. He left the village for so long without any reason. If it were just because Naruto was making a scene in the Hokage's office every day and disregarding Itachi's reputation, Minato would have judged him a rogue ninja long ago, according to the rules.