Konoha Drunkard

"Haha! Jiraiya could never have a son like this. We're leaving now!" Shanks laughed loudly.

"..." Kakashi looked up at the sky. What kind of look is that? How dare you say I'm Jiraiya's son? Aren't you afraid of getting beaten up by my old man?

When the two arrived at Konoha Park, a group of kids were running around. What caught Shanks' attention was that one of the kids was wearing an Uchiha clan uniform with goggles on his forehead.

Isn't this the Obito brothers who will grow up to be? It seems that the only one in Konoha who can play with the village children is Obito Uchiha, who is not valued among the Uchiha clan. In fact, Shanks has never seen an Uchiha child who can get along with the villagers of Konoha in all these years.

"Kakashi! Do you see that? Those kids are still like you, innocent, lively, and energetic." Shanks and Kakashi sat on a park bench.

“...So boring!” Kadian said, looking at the group of little kids in front of him.

"That's not called being bored, that's called being innocent and cute, you know? You should go too, how can someone your age not have any friends?" Shanks ruffled his white fur.

"...Do you really want to do this?" Karl looked at Shanks with a very resistant expression.

"Of course! Otherwise, why would I bring you here? To play house?" Shanks patted his head.

"Hey? Look! That looks like Lord Shanks!" Someone in the group of kids spotted them.

"It really is Lord Shanks! Is that brat next to Lord Shanks his son?" a little kid exclaimed.

"Idiot! That's Kakashi Hatake! My old man said that Lord Sakumo was too busy and was worried that he wouldn't have anything to eat at home, so he asked Lord Shanks to take care of him." A kid with a stick in his mouth, looking like a hooligan, said.

"Hey! Asuma, didn't you go train with your older brother today?" Shanks heard their conversation and looked over, immediately spotting Hiruzen Sarutobi's youngest son, a born scoundrel.

"Well! My older brother is busy, so I came out to play by myself!" Asuma said with his hands in his pockets, looking smug.

"Lord Shanks, did you bring Kakashi here to play?" A girl asked Shanks, but her eyes never left Kakashi.

This is the benefit of showing off at a young age. Look at Kakashi, who always stands out from the crowd of children by covering his face. No wonder he can attract all those little girls.

"Yes! Kakashi was too lonely growing up all by himself! So Uncle brought him here to play with you guys!" Shanks said pitifully.

"..." Kadian looked up at the sky, thinking, "God, loneliness and solitude, it's all your fault, okay?"

"Really? That's great! Kakashi is so cool!"

"Yes! Yes!"

As soon as Shanks finished speaking, a group of girls started chattering excitedly in the chat.

"I didn't expect you to be so popular! Your little wife is really lucky." Shanks laughed as he watched a group of little boys glaring resentfully at Kakashi.

"..." Kadian looked up at the sky.

186. After all these years, they're still spamming "subscribe" messages in the Iron rank.

"Damn it! Kakashi, I challenge you to a duel!" Just as a group of girls were chattering away in their chat, a brat fighting for love shouted at Kakashi.

"..." Kakashi looked at the kid in the Uchiha uniform with a blank expression.

"Haha! Young man, I admire this courage to fight for love! Go, young man! As long as you are brave in your heart, you are the strongest warrior!" Shanks was always eager to see more excitement.

"..." Kadian glanced at the frivolous middle-aged man with dead fish eyes.

"Come on, Kakashi! Fight like a man!" The little brat Obito was inspired by Shanks' words and shouted at Kakashi with soaring fighting spirit.

“...Alright.” Kakashi rolled his dead fish eyes at the little brat Obito and said indifferently.

"You bastard! How dare you look down on me!" Seeing Kakashi's gaze and hearing his tone, the little brat Obito became even angrier and charged straight at Kakashi.

As we all know, what was Kakashi's strength at three years old, and what was Obito's strength at three years old? There was no back-and-forth exchange as legend has it. Kakashi took down Obito with a single basic attack as he charged at him, followed by a massive Q!

"They're not even in the same league," Asuma remarked as Obito was taken down by a basic attack.

"Wow! Kakashi is amazing!" A group of girls added insult to injury to Obito's already wounded heart.

"Obito! Are you alright?" Fortunately, a kind girl ran over to check on Obito.

"Haha! How could anything happen to me! I was just letting him have his way." In front of his dream girl, he'd rather lose his head than lose face.

Shanks looked at Obito lying on the ground beside him and the girl next to him. No wonder Obito later became a dark schemer and destroyer for her sake. Just this wave of comforting someone who is injured—what man could resist that, especially in a world like Naruto where people's brains are most prone to getting carried away?

"Let's go..." Kakashi said to Shanks.

"What's the rush? It's rare that you've just met them. Relax for a day, and I'll teach you some training tomorrow," Shanks said, patting his head.

after that

"..." Kakashi resigned himself to his fate as a girl led him to the middle of the park to play house with a group of little kids, pretending to be ninjas and such. Shanks sat on the side watching, half asleep. No wonder Kakashi didn't want to play with these little brats. They were so childish! Shanks finally understood why geniuses don't usually stick together!

Look at the geniuses of Konoha. Tsunade started frequenting all sorts of casinos in Konoha when she was three years old. What's with playing house? I've never even heard of it.

Jiraiya knew the principle that men are born with a purpose when he was three years old, and by the age of five, he had visited all kinds of bathhouses in Konoha.

Orochimaru also quietly grew up to be a handsome young man from the age of three, and began to ponder the meaning of life at the age of five.

From the age of three, Hatake Sakumo was instilled by his father with the importance of diligent training to revitalize the Hatake clan and protect Konoha.

The second male lead's older brother started thinking about the meaning of war at the age of three and began learning ninjutsu from his father.

Even Minato Namikaze aspired to become Hokage at the age of three and began to train hard for his dream. And look at his friends, they weren't so childish.

Kakashi was rather unlucky! His generation of friends were all childish, even Hiruzen Sarutobi's youngest son, Asuma, was playing house.

After dinner, the kids all went home to their own mothers, except for Kakashi and Obito, who kept nagging in Kakashi's ear.

Kakashi ignored Obito's harsh words, his deadpan gaze fixed on the frivolous middle-aged man. Today's park experience was a nightmare for him. He was about to go crazy playing ninja games with a bunch of childish kids all afternoon, and to make matters worse, some random passerby whose name he couldn't remember kept nagging incessantly in his ear.

"Haha! How was it? Did you have fun with your friends?" Shanks raised an eyebrow at Kakashi, looking at Obito who had been talking non-stop.

"...I'm hungry, I'm not hungry." Kadian said very perfunctorily, now he just wanted to leave this place as soon as possible.

"Okay, let's go get some barbecue. How about the Uchiha kid? Want to come along?" Shanks said to Obito.

"Ah? No need, my grandma is waiting for me to come home for dinner. I'm leaving now, bye-bye Shanks-sama, bye-bye bastard Kakashi!" Obito had to give Kakashi one last piece of his mind before he was willing to go back.

"Haha! What an interesting brat! The Uchiha clan is full of talented people!" Shanks laughed as he watched Obito's retreating figure.

"...Is this interesting?" Kasper rolled his dead fish eyes and said.

"You wouldn't understand even if I explained it to you, don't forget you're still a kid! Let's go! Your old man will probably be home after we finish the barbecue." Shanks ruffled his white fur, trying to pet him into the second generation of Konoha Vulture.

When Shanks took Kakashi home, a white-haired boy and a light-yellow-haired boy were eating ramen at Konoha's famous hand-pulled ramen shop. The white-haired boy was asking the light-yellow-haired boy for advice while eating.

"Nawaki, how did you manage to win over Shizuka back then? Why did you manage to win her over so easily when we have the same personality? I've been trying to win over your older sister for over ten years."

As Jiraiya spoke, the white hair on his head began to droop down.

"Brother Jiraiya, well... actually, I don't know either. I just followed the method my uncle taught me, and I finished it in a few days. But Shizuka's task was much easier than my older sister's." Nawaki looked at Jiraiya helplessly.

Everyone in Konoha knows that Jiraiya has been flirting with Tsunade for over a decade, enduring her iron fists for just as long, but without any progress. His good friend Nawaki is also anxious for him.

You'd think that even someone at the Iron rank could reach the Grandmaster rank in the last ten years or so, but in Nawaki's eyes, Jiraiya has been grinding Iron rank for so many years without making any progress. Even he himself believes that he has at least reached the Diamond rank!

"Isn't there any way? You're her brother, you should know her weaknesses." Jiraiya looked at Nawaki.

“You’ve known her for over ten years longer than me, so you should know her better than I do. My uncle is right, the person who can conquer my older sister probably hasn’t been born yet. Brother Jiraiya, why don’t you find a different opponent? This one is too difficult,” Nawaki advised.

Although he also hoped that Jiraiya could win over his older sister, it seemed unlikely that he would succeed. If things continued like this, Jiraiya would only remain a single old dog.

"How could that be? Staying true to my principles has always been my ninja way! I will not change!" Jiraiya shook his head and said firmly.

"Hey! My older sister is so domineering, you can't control her. It's getting late, I have to go back, otherwise if my sister finds out I ran away, I'll definitely get another beating." Nawaki said to Jiraiya as he looked at the darkening sky.

"What? You're married now, why is Tsunade even stricter with you than before?" Jiraiya asked, puzzled.

Rope Tree looked up at the sky, trying hard not to let her tears fall. "Sigh! It's all tears if I keep talking about it!"

187. The deviation might be due to too much pressure. (Please subscribe)

"What happened?" Jiraiya asked when he saw Nawaki's eyes widen instantly. In his mind, getting married should be a happy thing, at least he wouldn't have to secretly study human body art like he did.

"My older sister has been blocking my door all day since last night. If it weren't for her gambling addiction, I'd probably still be stuck inside. She's treating me like a stud," Rope Tree said miserably.

Ever since the wedding ended yesterday, his older sister has been standing guard at the door of her house like a gatekeeper, making him and Shizuka lose all interest in clapping their hands, afraid that she would rush in halfway through.

When he got up early in the morning, his older sister was still waiting at the door, constantly ordering him to work harder so he could have more kids next year... Her behavior completely ruined his enthusiasm; having more kids... what a load of rubbish! He couldn't even leave the house; she practically treated him like a stud pig!

"Take care of yourself." Jiraiya patted him on the shoulder. Now he found some comfort in Nawaki. At least he could go out and have some fun.

......

"Tsunade, where are you rushing off to?"

When Shanks got back to his front door, he saw Tsunade rushing out of Nawaki's house.

"Nabatsuki ran away! I was only out for a little while and he disappeared. I have to go find him. If he doesn't give me a few kids tonight, I'll beat him to death!" Tsunade said angrily.

"...You're not really going to be guarding his door the whole time, are you?" Shanks looked at Tsunade as if she were a monster.

“Yes, I’m afraid he won’t work hard enough, so of course I have to keep an eye on him,” Tsunade said.

"...This lady. Having a child isn't about how hard he tries. Your dad was locked up by your grandma for years before he was born, and...you've been standing guard at the door like a gatekeeper, so even if he wanted to have a child, there was nothing you could do." Shanks covered his face, speechless. What kind of supervision was this?

"Is that so?" Tsunade asked, stroking her chin.

"You need to give him more time, and don't put too much pressure on him. I guess your grandma put too much pressure on your dad back then, which is why he was born out of his mind. Look at his talent points, they're all in studying human body art. You don't want his child to be like him, do you?" Shanks forcefully persuaded him, and then he realized that was true.

Back then, he was pressured by Mito for several years before giving birth to Big Mom, one of the Four Emperors. As a result, Big Mom, who should have been able to defeat Jonin at the age of five and establish a pirate crew to dominate a region of the sea at the age of sixteen, went astray and became a complete housewife.

Looking back at Tsunade, neither Hashirama Senju nor Mito Senju urged Koma Senju to act. They let things take their course. As a result, although Tsunade loved to gamble, her talent and personality were not a problem. She was a genius in medical ninjutsu, with an overbearing personality and an even more powerful aura than Shanks.

“What you said seems to make sense. Let’s give him a few months and let him give it a try,” Tsunade said after thinking for a moment.

"You should go back and rest too. Your dark circles are even worse than the Hokage's." Shanks waved to him and went home.

.......

The next day, Sakumo Hatake brought Card over to Haruko-sama on time and then went to the Anbu.

"Yo, Kakashi's here!"

Shanks didn't get up very early today, and as soon as he stepped out of his room, he saw Kakashi having breakfast.

"Good morning, Uncle!" Still those dead fish eyes, still that indifferent tone.

"Eat quickly. I'm taking you somewhere today. You might even meet your lifelong rival." Shanks thought to himself, "Isn't Might Guy already three years old? Haruko-sama was the one who delivered him back then."

"What do you mean, a lifelong rival?" Kadian pouted slightly upon hearing this.

"Haha, you'll see when the time comes, he's also a very awesome genius!" Shanks laughed loudly, imagining how Kasper would be pestered by the green-skinned Guy in the future.

"...What other geniuses in Konoha don't I know about?" Kakashi's words revealed strong confidence.