Laughing American comics, I am becoming more and more like a clown

"Do you know why?" the clown asked.

So Lucian thought... from the beginning to now... or when was the first step he took to get here.

...after I came out of Ms. Taylor's psychological clinic.

Chapter 117 How miserable

At Ms. Taylor's place, Lucien felt truly irritated for the first time in nearly a month, as far as he could remember.

It was his first step towards the Joker.

The clown looked at him at this moment with the pity and tenderness he would have towards a kitten and a bird: "My dear, that was your first breath in this world - it was anger."

Although his daily life with Jenny was as dreamy as bubbles, Lucien occasionally felt a sense of comfort from the bottom of his heart... He really wanted to make these things real and then live like this.

So the clown now sighs: "That is your cradle, the milk that nourishes your growth - that is happiness."

Later, when Jenny died, Lucien knew what happened, but he could not avoid the strange distress... He really regarded Jenny as his wife and the two embryos as his own children.

"That's your false perception of the world - it's pain." The clown said compassionately.

And soon after, he saw Batman's miserable condition through the sniper scope, and was shocked at that moment.

"It's fear—your visceral, cowardly escape."

Finally, there's Harley and the Joker... and the light in the single green eye.

"And this is what touched me the most." The clown's expression was particularly strange, like mockery, but also like recognition:

"You actually woke up because of me... That's envy, a jealousy strong enough to break through the barriers."

……

Is Lucien jealous of the Joker?

Maybe the word should be separated, he envies the clown and he hates the clown.

……

"What these emotions have in common is that they are real... They are what you feel from the heart."

The clown took off his hat, and his seaweed-like curls fluttered in the gentle breeze. Without the brim to block the view, the sunset light reflected on half of his face:

"Or rather, the closer you are to nothingness, the closer you are to death."

Looking sideways at Lucian, both the bright and dark parts were filled with the same sorrow:

"And the closer you get to the truth, the closer you get to me."

……

I can't help but return to that question again - what is a clown?

He is the criminal emperor of Gotham, a madman who controls people's hearts, a synonym for madness, a reckless terrorist, Batman's nemesis, the hatred in people's hearts, a collection of festering places, and revenge on the world... These are all correct, but they are too superficial.

So some people say: The Joker is the embodiment of rules, an outlet for emotions, the bringer of disaster, the human body of the devil... This is also correct, but it seems to push him to the altar. Over-deep interpretation completely loses the charm of this character itself.

……

So Lucien heard his gentle, affectionate, loving, and in some ways pleading words.

The clown said:

"Don't treat me as an enemy... We should be each other's bone, flesh, and flesh. We should be closer than lovers and last longer than a married couple..."

Lucien looked at him, but it was as if he was looking at himself in a mirror.

But that self was stronger, smarter, more deceptive... and had evil intentions towards him that were wrapped in honey.

Lucien's existence is always wrapped by the Joker, who protects his fragile existence and pale image... but he is also constantly devouring everything that "Lucien" has.

Their relationship is more like the story of Pi and the Bengal tiger drifting on the sea - wary of each other, dependent on each other, and tamed by each other.

They invade each other, yet reveal a strange harmony.

……

Lucian turned his gaze away from the clown and cast his eyes towards the meaningless sea in the distance:

"I'm like fish at the market, all the moisture has evaporated...When I feel like I can't hold on any longer, you always sprinkle me with some water at the right time and yet be stingy."

"Then I'll take a few more leaps and bounds, and act like I'm full of life."

"And you... you sit on your high pedestal, watching me go through the pain of an uncertain future over and over again."

"Clown, you don't want me to die, but you also won't raise me gently."

……

He always encouraged Lucien when he gave up, and obstructed him when he wanted to do something.

The clown listened to Lucian's complaints, but he just put the hat with peacock feathers on Lucian's head, hooked his chin, looked at him for a moment, and said:

"you're so beautiful."

"Poor creature..."

----

Lucien fell silent... but he wasn't speechless.

But it's this women's wide-brimmed hat with blue peacock feathers.

You exchanged hallucinations, immortality, and memories for the identity of an ordinary person.

Now that the so-called ordinary life has ended, the price of nature must be paid... From the moment the clown put this hat that holds the power of hallucinations, memories and immortality on his head...

"Poor creature" Lucien kept thinking about these three words.

He really should be called a poor guy... -22, -32, and now to this unknown universe.

He lamented, "If this were a novel, if I were the protagonist... then I'd really feel sorry for the readers - to see a completely unoriginal, unremarkable person trying to mediate between Batman and the Joker, only to be treated like a fool by both."

"He wants to replace the Joker and become an independent figure, but he can be fooled by any character."

"I shouldn't say Batman is so miserable..." His voice became smaller and smaller, with a hint of pity: "I am also very miserable..."

……

Lucien Emerson Turner

"Lu" "E" "Te" = "l" "au" "t"

Laughter, laughter.

……

Then the laughter really came out from the laughing mouth: "Hahahahahahaha——"

So Lucien looked at the Joker.

"boom--"

The fist hit the clown's face without warning, causing the corner of his lip to crack.

……

Lucian pressed down on the clown, punching him continuously until he couldn't get up... He didn't even have time to speak.

The clown endured it, but not just endured it - after a brief moment of surprise, he began to fight back.

Thus, there occurred the most primitive and direct violence between people.

Flesh collided with flesh, blood stars began to pop out, bruises appeared on the body, and they rolled shapelessly on the beach, with golden sand flying and flowing - no one held back.

"Hmph, kid, why are you hitting me?" The clown flipped Lucian to the ground and punched him in the nose: "Aren't we just having a nice chat?"

Nosebleeding, Lucian kicked him in the groin with his legs, forcing the clown to hold him down... and then bit his face with his teeth...

He was like a wild beast, facing the clown, like facing prey, and like struggling from the hunter's hands.

He didn't speak, and probably didn't hear what the clown said. He didn't even use any fighting skills, but just vented in a vulgar and brutal way.

Chapter 118 Love you

So the clown said, "So you know I love you?"

Another punch hit his mouth... but his arm blocked it. He looked into the rare, slightly changed, identical eyes and laughed out loud, "You know I love you."

The clown laughed happily. After turning over and pressing Lucien under him, he said expectantly: "So, tell me quickly, tell me you love me."

"If you just say it, I'll fight you... Honey, you know you can't beat me."

Lucian raised his head to bite his neck, but was stopped. The clown buried his head in his neck, blocking the direction of his head turning.

...This is really ambiguous.

In particular, the Joker's fiery breath was in his chest, and his laughter seemed to resonate in his chest:

"You don't understand, baby, you don't understand this...how happy I was when I realized this...when I realized I could love myself."

……

The Joker also has feelings for Lucien, not for Batman or Harley Quinn... That's why he treats Lucien so gently and playfully.

Because he knew clearly that Lucian was his past...his past self.

Lucien is looking for an anchor point to "become a clown", and the clown is also looking for an anchor point to "become himself".

……

They let go of each other and sat back in their chairs, both looking disheveled, like war criminals and prisoners.

"Do you want to hear my story?" the clown asked in a distant voice.

"No," Lucien said.

The clown glanced at him and said, "So, to put it another way, do you want to hear your story?"

"I don't want to either." Lucian still refused.

The clown didn't have to say anything, so he remained silent.

There was nothing good about the scene before me. It seemed amazing at first glance, but soon I felt bored when I realized its eternity.