mygo, but Cthulhu

Hailing fell silent and revealed a complex and tired smile. At the same time, Miao Meng also frowned slightly, trying to ease the atmosphere.

"Boss, although Haizi did make mistakes, you don't have to say that. It's really a bit..."

"Shut up, Amoris!"

Xiangzi interrupted her harshly, and the pressure and pain that had been accumulating for a long time turned into anger and poured out.

"Your attitude has never been up to par! Since you've joined avemujica, you should have put aside all the Yutenji Wakami stuff, understand?! You've always been obsessed with traffic and fans, which is really not decent at all!"

"...throw them all away?"

The smile on Ruomai's face disappeared, and his brows furrowed.

"Hey, Xiangzi, are you still going to insist on saying this? Ultimately, this band is just a money-making tool. Our real identities are definitely more important than these code names. How can we really do what you say?"

"I don't care what you are at other times, but in the practice room and on stage, you must and can only be Amoris."

"Are you serious? Then in your eyes I'm just filling in for Amoris, right?"

Ruomai was a little annoyed, and Chuhua saw that the situation was not good and hurriedly tried to persuade Xiangzi.

"Well, Xiaoxiang, there's no need to be so strict, right? Haven't we been performing very well all along? There's no need to..."

“We did play well, but only well.”

Toyokawa Shoko suddenly interrupted her.

"avemujica should have been able to do more, we should have been able to perform better, and there is still a long way to go. In addition, with the added distractions of reality, we certainly can't waste our energy on insignificant things."

"You must understand this, doloris, or you risk becoming a factor in our failure."

"..."

Sanjiao Chuhua was stunned for a moment. After realizing what Xiangzi said, she nodded tremblingly, and the room fell into silence again.

"Okay, we've wasted enough time. Now let's start rehearsing. Everyone must perform at their best."

Seeing that no one spoke anymore, Shoko Toyokawa slowly exhaled. She walked to her seat and prepared to start, but the next moment she saw Wakaba Mutsu stand up and put the guitar aside, then looked up at her calmly.

"What do you want to do, mortis? Rehearsals have already begun!"

"Xiang, I am Mu,"

"..."

Wakaba Mu responded softly, and Toyokawa Shoko suddenly opened her eyes wide.

"Xiang, you are too scared, too tired, and in pain, but it is wrong to vent your pain wantonly.

"Xiang, you're treating us like puppets just to escape reality. You're trying to escape under the guise of avemujica, but escaping won't change anything."

"enough!!!"

Xiangzi roared out suddenly, making Ruoye Mu stunned for a moment.

"Xiang..."

"Mu, you've always been so high and mighty. I've been running around everywhere for that good-for-nothing father, but you're still the eldest daughter of the Ruoye family. You certainly don't need to consider how hard I've worked to survive!"

"The Toyokawa family is such a behemoth that even your parents have been trying to please them. How can you, a puppet controlled by someone else, judge me like that?!"

"..."

Ruoye Mu stared at her blankly and didn't say anything for a long time. When Xiangzi saw her expression, he couldn't help but grit his teeth because of guilt. She closed her eyes and tried hard to suppress the pain in her heart, and forced herself to steady her body.

"...Anyway, let's start rehearsing now."

Naturally, the practice under such circumstances could not be very good. The notes were lifeless like corpses, and were forced to sound gradually under the coercion of the instruments. The completely mismatched melody tortured everyone's ears.

Xiangzi finally couldn't bear it anymore, and her fingertips pressed roughly on the keys to end the performance. Her golden pupils filled with anger suddenly raised and glanced at everyone, but the puppets around her were obviously not interested in the instruments.

Timoris looked down at Beth indifferently, Amoris looked at her expressionlessly, Doloris looked at her worriedly, and Mortis had dull eyes, like a real puppet.

...How ridiculous!

Oblivionis seemed to hear Toyokawa Shoko mocking her wantonly, laughing at the mess she had made.

Chapter 44 Xiangzi Refuses Mercy

After the chaotic practice ended, Toyokawa Shoko walked out alone in a daze. Chuhua worriedly chased after her, while Hailing and Ruomai started packing their things on their own.

At the same time, Hailing glanced at Ruoye Mu who was sitting quietly beside her, and after thinking for a while, she spoke softly.

"Aren't you going after Fengchuan?"

"...Chuhua is enough. Xiang doesn't want to see me now."

Ruoye Mu was silent and shook his head, while Hailing also sighed softly. She turned her head to look at Ruomai who was still frowning, and asked softly,

"Meow Mengzi, are you interested in staying for a while?"

"I'm Miao Mengqin... That's fine. Haizi, what do you want to talk to me about?"

Miao Meng replied subconsciously, and then nodded slightly with some curiosity, while Hailing raised her hand to gesture to Ruoye Mu.

"Just now Fengchuan talked about her situation, and I realized that she only told us about what happened today and didn't mention anything about herself."

"We haven't really understood her all this time. I think it's because we don't know her situation... Ruoye, are you willing to tell us about her experience?"

"...Xiang doesn't want you to know,"

After hesitating for a while, Ruo Yemu shook her head, and Hailing leaned over and stared at her.

"Given her personality, she definitely doesn't want us to know. But you should also know that the pressure she's under right now is too great. Anyone can see that she's about to collapse."

"If you don't tell us, it will be difficult for us to help her. When she really breaks down, she will hurt herself... Is this what you want to see?"

"No,"

Ruo Yemu shook her head subconsciously. She pursed her lips in the struggle in her heart, and finally slowly raised her head to look at Hailing, her eyes full of fear and hesitation.

"I told you... Can Xiang change for the better? Should I speak up this time? Or would it be better if I just remained silent?"

"You need to make your own judgment, Ruoye,"

Hailing looked at her seriously.

"Do you think Fengchuan needs our help now? Do you think it's better for you to be honest or continue to hide it?"

"It's okay for you to be upset by her reaction just now, but I think you're right. Fengchuan needs someone to point out her pain. Even if she gets angry, you can't back down."

"..."

There was a long silence. When Hai Ling almost thought that her persuasion had failed, Ruo Yemu lowered his eyes and nodded slightly.

"I understand, I tell you."

She slowly narrated what happened to Xiangzi, telling them her struggle and unwillingness, and Ruomai nodded suddenly.

"I see. While this doesn't change her outrageous words today, I can understand her a little better now... Speaking of which, Hailing, as a hunter under the orders of the Toyokawa family, you should have known about this a long time ago, right? Do you still need to ask Mutsuko?"

"I do know, but I got that information as a hunter, so I don't want to say it directly if possible."

Hailing shook her head and glanced at Ruoye Mu.

"Also, I think it's better to let Ruoye make her own decision. She's obviously hesitant because of Fengchuan's reaction. I want her to understand that she can make her own decision."

"Thanks,"

Ruoye Mu nodded seriously, and Miao Meng also spoke thoughtfully,

"Haizi, what should we do next?"

"Let's wait for Sanjiao to come back. It's unlikely that she can restore Fengchuan, but when she comes back we'll know Fengchuan's specific reaction and use it to judge how bad her mental state is."

Hailing shook her head slightly.

"If it gets bad enough, we'll have to keep a close eye on her to prevent her from doing anything stupid... but I don't think it will be that bad."

Before this, Chu Hua also hurriedly caught up with Xiangzi. Her calls received no response, so she had no choice but to hold Xiangzi's hand to force her to stop, and tried to comfort her worriedly.

"Xiaoxiang, are you okay? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be against you before, I was just very worried about you..."

"Let go, Chuhua,"

Xiangzi lowered his head, refusing to meet her gaze, and spoke in a tired whisper, which made Chuhua hold her hand even tighter.

"Xiao Xiang...you can rely on me. I can sense that you have been shouldering a lot. I can help you."

"Chuhua, you have helped me a lot. You don't need to do anything else for me."

Xiangzi sighed, and Chuhua hurriedly tried to assure him,

"It's okay, I can always..."

"If you continue to help me... I won't be able to repay you."

Xiangzi interrupted her softly, and suddenly looked up at her. His familiar eyes were full of panic, which made Chuhua stunned.

"Xiao Xiang..."

"You're a very popular idol. You didn't have to join my band, but you did it without hesitation. You've been very tired for avemujica, but I pretended not to notice anything for the sake of the band..."

Xiangzi looked at her and laughed weakly.

"I owe you a lot, Chuhua. This is the limit of what a friend can owe you. I can't owe you more because I don't have the ability to repay you. Even if you don't care about this, I can't do it."

"I'm sorry, Chuhua... I'm such a hateful person who would hurt others for the sake of dignity. I can't accept it.

I was so overwhelmed with pity that I could not sleep or eat."

"I'm sorry, Chuhua, this is all I can say. I... don't want to admit defeat even now."

"Xiao Xiang..."

Chu Hua felt her mind was a little dazed. She opened her mouth to say something, but could only whisper her best friend's name.

You said you didn't want to owe me anything anymore...but, am I not worthy of you doing this?

She silently watched Xiangzi pull his hand away, stumble and turn away. She wanted to chase him, but even if she did, she would probably still be rejected.

Chu Hua returned to the practice room tiredly, and Hai Ling also asked softly,

"She refused the help, didn't she?"

"Xiaoxiang feels that she shouldn't owe me anymore,"

Chu Hua smiled bitterly.

"Did I do something wrong? Why does she keep rejecting me..."

"You did nothing wrong. Although Fengchuan is stubborn, it's hard to say she was wrong."

Hailing shook her head slightly.

"She's always insisted on taking it all on herself, but that wears her out. She insists we're all the same because she doesn't want to be vulnerable."

"She has reached a dead end, and we can't give up on her, otherwise she will never be able to get out of it until she can no longer hold on and collapses completely."

Chapter 45 Mei Zhulan's Doubts

To be honest, when Aine touched a gun for the first time, she was actually quite excited. After all, this weapon, which she had never touched before, looked very cool. When she raised the gun and aimed, she felt even more heroic.

But after she really started practicing, she soon stopped thinking so. The close-range gunshots were harsher than she had heard before, and the recoil was beyond her imagination. She watched the actors on TV shooting with one hand easily and comfortably, but when she tried it, she felt like her wrist was almost broken.

After firing dozens of rounds, it was pure torture for Aine. She felt a buzzing in her ears and her wrist was in unbearable pain.

However, even if she subconsciously wanted to give up, she could no longer think so after seeing Deng's extremely serious look. Even though Deng also felt uncomfortable, she kept trying her best to persevere. She refused to take a break even when Li Xi advised her to, and just held the gun and shot seriously.

Unfortunately, except for Lenai, none of them could shoot accurately. They thought they had aimed well, but the bullets missed the target after they fired. After shooting for a long time, they only made a few more bullet holes on the target.

Even if she asked Rakuna for advice, she would just say to go with her gut feeling… Aine felt that this was not a normal answer at all.

After returning home, Aine's wrists hurt so much that she could barely hold chopsticks. She finally managed to get her worried parents to stop asking her questions. Even if she wanted to practice guitar, it was impossible.

Walking on the way to school with Deng, Aine recalled what happened yesterday and couldn't help but sigh deeply.

"Xiao Ai...what's wrong?"

Deng noticed her expression and asked softly, and Aine smiled helplessly.

"I'm having a headache because of yesterday's shooting practice. We each fired over a hundred rounds yesterday, but only hit the target two or three times... It seems that except for Lenai-chan, none of us are geniuses in this area."

"Rinrinko-senpai said that Lenai-chan was able to hit so accurately because she had been practicing all the time."

The lamp responded seriously,

"This is our first time, so it's normal to be inaccurate. I think guns are just like musical instruments. As long as we practice more, we will definitely be able to make progress."