I will never give in to Miss Death

【…】

"..."

……

No. 146 Let’s build the building blocks of our childhood together

Li Denghua's situation was pretty much what I had guessed.

There is actually nothing wrong with her learning ability, in fact, it is very good.

The reason why she failed in Chinese and English was most likely not because she "couldn't learn" but because she "didn't want to learn", or she "deliberately" acted like she was bad at Chinese and English in order to gain some attention.

Based on the small "essay" notebook in Li Denghua's schoolbag, I can roughly guess what this child's status was like in school before.

She is closer to her father at home and was even raised by him since she was a child. The father and daughter have a very deep relationship. There may be some conflicts with her mother, but because her father is busy with work and seldom comes home, she has to live with her mother. In order to see her father more often, she deliberately makes her Chinese and English grades very bad so as to "trick" her father into paying more attention to her.

Normally, sixth grade students have learned most of the characters, so writing diaries and essays normally is certainly not a problem for them. However, Li Denghua used a lot of Chinese characters replaced by pinyin in this "essay". I guess there are two possibilities. One is to prove that her Chinese grades are really bad, and the other is that she is lazy and doesn't even bother to look up the characters she can't remember and just writes them down - after all, it's like her mood diary, so she will just do whatever is convenient.

This feeling is just like writing mathematical calculations in a draft book. Some people like to write their drafts neatly and properly, while others just write whatever they feel comfortable with.

Li Denghua must have thought about who she might give this notebook to in the future, so when she was writing, she was mentally prepared that "someone would read what's here", or she simply intended to use this notebook to tell others what she was thinking.

Don't ask me how I know this, because I did something similar when I was a kid.

When I was in elementary school, our head teacher and Chinese teacher also asked everyone to write a diary. After each diary was written, the head teacher would collect everyone's diaries and correct and comment on them. At that time, if I had anything to say but didn't dare to say it out loud, I would write it in my diary and then prepare to "make the contents of the diary public."

For example, the food in the canteen of the welfare home was not delicious at that time, so I would express my dissatisfaction in my diary, write down various suggestions, and then record several of my favorite foods, fantasizing that after I handed in the diary tomorrow, the head teacher would see it and tell our canteen chef to cook my favorite dishes.

Children's thoughts are sometimes so pure and innocent.

Based on the same empathy, it is not difficult for me to imagine that when Li Denghua wrote these sentences, she had actually anticipated the situation where she would show the notebook to others in the future, and hoped that the person who saw these sentences in the notebook could solve her troubles.

Otherwise, there would be no need for her to put such a private notebook in her schoolbag and ask me to bring it over today.

Then, based on the words in the notebook, I feel that Li Denghua doesn’t seem to be very popular in school.

Combined with the lonely look on her face when I asked her "Don't you have any other friends at school?" in the coffee shop, my intuition told me that this little girl was probably the type who was ostracized by her classmates at school.

I know the feeling.

Because when I was living in a small apartment, I was a similar type of person.

At that time, I lived in a small apartment. The neighbors upstairs and downstairs all liked to drink, go out and dance, or discuss where to pick up girls. My interests and hobbies were almost all on the Internet. Every day when I got home from work, I played games or watched anime. The neighbors asked me if I wanted to go out for a drink, but I said no. The housing manager offered me a cigarette, but I said I didn't smoke. Over time, I was excluded from the "circle of friends" in the small apartment and was regarded as a freak among men.

But after all, it is an adult world. Although the neighbors upstairs and downstairs in the cramped apartment think I am "unmanly", they will not come over to cause trouble directly, nor will they gossip in the group. On the surface, everyone is still polite. If I have any problems, I will go to the housing management, and the housing management will help solve them, but they are not as enthusiastic as others.

But children are different. If they like something, they like it. If they don’t like something, they will show it. They are not as smooth and understanding as adults.

Li Denghua often won awards in liberal arts competitions such as mathematics, physics and chemistry. She was called a "genius" by her teachers and was often compared with her own children by parents. She was regarded as "other people's children". When their own children did poorly on exams, these parents would say, "Look at Li Denghua, she has always got full marks, what about you?" When the children were naughty and loved to play, or did not pay attention to time and did not do their homework, the parents would say, "You only know how to play all day long. Li Denghua is so well-behaved. She takes the initiative to do her homework at home after school, and you still need me to urge you", etc.

Over time, Li Denghua easily lost her popularity.

Some children who don’t like Li Denghua may even call on their peers “not to play with her”. In addition, Li Denghua herself seems to be an introverted person. She doesn’t like to talk, can’t explain, and is busy reading and studying every day, so she is easily isolated in class.

[I have done my best]

【Why】

[Hate, hate]

【Fort Da! Fort Da! Fort Da! 】

【Los! Los! Los! 】

After spending some time looking through the slightly messy "essay" written by Li Denghua, I felt my head swelling.

This family of theirs... has a lot of problems.

Not to mention Li Denghua herself, her mom and dad...it seems that there are some issues with the way they educate their children.

At least until now, I have never met Li Denghua's father. I just know that he works in the Shenbin Artisan District and studies the high-end field of physics.

"Forget it, these are other people's family affairs, I just need to do my job well."

Thinking of this, I rubbed my eyes a little, did some eye exercises for myself, and glanced at the clock on top of the podium in front of me.

It’s 7:50 and there are still ten minutes until the get out of class ends.

Hmm... I miss it so much. It has been a long time since I returned to campus and sat in a classroom to "listen to class" like this.

When I was an elementary school student, I felt that I was too young and was bullied everywhere. I was eager to go to junior high school and become a "senior". After entering junior high school, I felt that only high school could be considered a real "adult". After entering high school, all kinds of study pressure suddenly came down on me. I felt that the right thing to do was to graduate from high school and go to college. I could have fun in college. After becoming a college student, I felt that the counselor was nagging and the student union was powerful, and my life was restricted everywhere. It would be better to enter society early and achieve financial freedom and be free.

Finally, when I became a corporate slave, I understood that…a person’s student days are the most relaxing and memorable.

But we can't go back.

When we were students, we had no pressure to find a job, and we didn’t need to consider the various social etiquette of adults. We didn’t have to worry about problems like unemployment and not having enough food to eat. We could make friends with all kinds of people every day at school, and there were people to supervise our daily routine, and our physical condition was the best.

"..."

After putting Li Denghua's "Essays" back into the schoolbag, I rechecked the schoolbag which even I felt was a bit heavy when carrying it, and took out several books from it.

"Primary School Physics", "Primary School Chemistry", "Primary School Biology", "History Appreciation"...

These books should be about minor subjects. They feel quite thin and are only half the level of Chinese textbooks.

In addition, this schoolbag also contains textbooks such as "Physical Education and Art", "Information Technology", "Social Practice", "Computer Use", etc.

Are today's primary schools a bit too progressive?

If I remember correctly, adding subjects such as physics, chemistry and biology to the fifth grade of elementary school seemed to be a "policy" announced by Kamihama City a few years ago. At that time, the whole country was calling for "reducing the burden", but Kamihama City publicly stated that it would add new courses to the fifth grade of elementary school. This was "going against the current" and was criticized by people from all walks of life. At that time, there was wave after wave of condemnation against Kamihama City on the Internet, so I remember it clearly.

When I was in elementary school, there were not many subjects. There were only three subjects below the third grade: Chinese, mathematics, and physical education.

There are three classes in the morning and two classes in the afternoon. The rest of the time is free activities, or the teacher will send us to the library and gym to develop personal interests. In the morning, we have Chinese, math and physical education, and in the afternoon, we have Chinese and math. The order is slightly changed every day, and then we do a general cleaning after school.

In the third grade of primary school, our curriculum added two new subjects, "Art" and "Computer". "Primary School English" was added in the fifth grade of primary school. We started to memorize ABCD, and then in the sixth grade of primary school, we started to learn basic English sentences such as How are you.

In contrast, today’s primary school students have physics and chemistry interest classes in the fifth grade. In the sixth grade, they have even learned basic English conversations and have started to write short essays. This makes me sigh - the pace of society is getting faster and faster every year.

"Hello then."

Just as I was checking Li Denghua's textbooks and homework books one by one and memorizing all the little girl's problems in detail, Zhou Xiaofei, an elementary school girl sitting next to me, came over and whispered, "Are you good at math?"

"Eh?"

I came back to my senses from the mess of my elementary school textbooks: "Probably... I guess so."

Is this a question for me?

Although I have been away from school for a long time, I should have no problem with elementary school questions - but it is harder to say about junior high school questions.

The junior high school questions from our generation might have been classified as elementary school questions now. I can't review trigonometric functions and quadratic equations again.

"I don't understand a question very well."

Sure enough, under my gaze, the girl timidly handed me her homework book and math textbook: "Can you help me take a look? Why is there a greater than sign in this question?"

"Wait a minute, let me take a look."

I took Zhou Xiaofei's math textbook and asked, "Question 3?"

"Ah."

"Fill in the greater than or equal to sign in the brackets...15/16 divided by 5/8..."

I read the question softly and frowned slightly.

Wow, I knew that the elementary school questions of this era have already included some of the junior high school questions of my era.

"Because here five-eighths is less than one."

Seeing the question, I patiently explained to Zhou Xiaofei next to me: "When you divide this number by a number less than one, it is greater than itself."

"why?"

"because……"

I glanced at the teacher at the podium and tried my best to explain it using sentences that a child could understand, and also gave a few examples from life.

"Understand?"

"Oh……"

Zhou Xiaofei thought for a moment, "I understand."

"I have a question for you, too."

Seeing the clock on the podium approaching eight o'clock, I stared into the eyes of the girl next to me and asked, "Do you know 'butterfly'?"

"Butterfly?"

"It's related to the previous sixth grade class three."

I explained, "A year ago, the sixth grade class three all graduated. It seems that the teacher at the school said that they had something to give to Li Deng... ahem, for me. It should be called 'Butterfly'. Do you know what it is?"

"Oh, I've heard of this butterfly...it's the name of a doll."

"doll?"

"Yes, they are sold in the stationery store next to our school. They are different from ordinary dolls. They are dolls that you can write messages on, similar to the yearbook."

Zhou Xiaofei explained hurriedly: "There are many small pieces of cloth on the doll's skirt, and you can write on them. It's like asking good friends to write a sentence or two of blessing for graduation. Toys like this... I don't know what to say."

Speaking of this, the girl in front of me seemed to have a limited ability to express herself: "Go to that stationery store after school and you'll know. I'm a dorm student and can't go out."

There is also this saying...

It turns out that the so-called "butterfly" is just a toy?

Did Li Denghua see this toy being sold in a stationery store before, and bought it to write messages on the skirts of her classmates?

She knew that she would have to take a leave of absence from school to be hospitalized and would not be able to attend the graduation ceremony, so she bought such a toy and placed it on her seat, asking everyone in the class not to forget her after graduation and to write a message?

If that's the case, I seem to understand why she doesn't dare to take this "butterfly".

Li Denghua was not popular in her class, and she probably thought that when she took the doll, there might be all kinds of graffiti and insulting sentences written on it.

This is really a bit of a headache.

"Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-"

Just at this moment, the clock on the wall pointed to eight o'clock and the get out of class was over.

"Thank you."

Feeling that I had gathered enough information, I quickly put the books on the table into my schoolbag, zipped it up, and said to Zhou Xiaofei beside me, "Please take a look. I'm going to talk to the teacher about something."

Zhou Xiaofei nodded sensibly: "Okay."

"teacher."

I quickly walked up to the podium and spent a few minutes briefly explaining the situation to the female teacher who was correcting homework.

"That's probably what happened. Li Denghua doesn't dare to come over and take the butterfly doll. I want to ask..."

After explaining the whole story, I tried to speak in a calm tone, as the teacher looked at me like an alien, "Is the doll that Li Denghua put in her place still there?"

"Are you sure you're not kidding?"

It took the teacher a while to recover. She looked at me for a long time and said, "You...are really an adult?"

"real."

I pulled my wallet out of my pocket and found my ID card: "Here."

"Yin Nuoer...born in 03...right?"

The teacher was surprised: "You look no different from the other kids in the class..."

"Well... that's not important."

In order to prevent the teacher from asking more weird questions, I quickly continued the topic: "So, teacher, do you know where the doll is?"

"Of course I know about Li Denghua from Class 63. I'm their class teacher."

Standing up from the chair, the female teacher returned my ID card to me and walked out of the classroom: "Follow me."

I quickly followed.

"Li Denghua had almost no friends in class at that time. She was not good at talking, the girls didn't like her, and the boys also liked to tease her."

Walking in the bright corridor of the teaching building, the female teacher sighed: "These small toys were very popular in the class at that time, and there were also yearbooks. I don't know where these kids learned it from, but they like to buy similar small props for commemoration, yearbooks, paper crane boxes, etc. Li Denghua did buy a small doll for me, and said that if she had not recovered and was discharged from the hospital by the time of the graduation ceremony, she wanted me to give the doll to the classmates and ask them to write some blessings on the slips under their skirts."