You don't even want to call me godfather

A man's body was hanging on the street lamp, covered in blood.

The street lamp was surrounded by a crowd of people, who were talking about the government uniform the man was wearing.

The blood dripping from the corpse dyed the snow on the road red. Koshe stood by the roadside, looking at the crowd silently. Mrs. Helen covered her face and cried behind him. Her husband Loft held her in his arms silently. Mikhail grabbed the corner of Loft's clothes stupidly. He looked at his parents at a loss.

This way, it can be considered as an explanation to Mrs. Helen, Koshe thought.

It was not until several government lawmakers who heard the news drove over and dispersed the crowd that Koshei threw away the cigarette butt and stomped it out.

"What about Leah? I'm sorry I didn't save her."

Koshe apologized to Mrs. Helen, saying that he understood how it felt to lose a loved one, which was not easy, especially when the murderer was a political enemy.

But this was all Koshei could do. He couldn't think of any better way to comfort Mrs. Helen.

"No...it's not your fault, kid..."

Mrs. Helen wiped away her tears with her sleeve and tried to comfort Kocher with a forced smile, which made him feel even more guilty.

Looking at the young Mikhail, Koshei walked forward and squatted in front of him.

"Brother Koshe..."

The child seemed very overwhelmed. He didn't know the concept of death yet. For him, he only knew that he would never see his sister again.

His expression reminded Koshei of himself when he lost Destiny, so he reached out and ruffled Mikhail's hair.

"Everything will be fine, Mikhail, don't worry."

Koshe was a little overwhelmed and said things that even he didn't believe.

Will this all be okay?

He didn't know that from the day he declared war on the government, everything was going downhill, and the people around him would have to suffer pain that they shouldn't have because of his recklessness at the time.

Koshe stood up, exhaled a puff of mist, and looked at his feet in confusion.

"You don't need to blame yourself for this, Godfather."

At this moment, Loft suddenly stood in front of him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Loft?"

Koshe looked at Loft in confusion. He didn't have much friendship with Loft. Even as a neighbor, he seldom saw Loft. He only knew this name as one of the most trusted cadres around his father.

"I should have expected that those bastards would attack the relatives of the Cascade family's followers first," Loft gritted his teeth and said, "Whether as a follower or a father, this matter should be considered my responsibility. If I had moved my family to a safe place in time like Jose did, this would not have happened."

Koshe was silent. He didn't understand why neither Mrs. Helen nor Loft was willing to blame him.

It was obvious that their daughter was retaliated by the government because he shot William. If he had suppressed his emotions at the time, perhaps the tragedy would not have happened.

He felt confused. Was it possible that everything he had been insisting on was just in vain in the end?

The power of the government was not eradicated, the Cascade family did not become the head of Syracuse, but the people around him continued to pay for his actions and suffer.

He even gradually began to understand Lappland's approach. Now, he no longer cared whether the people in the government were divided into good and evil. Instead of spending time and energy to distinguish between good and bad people, he now wanted to catch all the bad people mixed in the crowd.

It is better to kill a thousand people by mistake than to let one go.

Koshe gently broke free from Loft's hand, turned silently and walked towards the street.

"Where are you going, Godfather?"

Loft was worried about Koshei now. He had followed Ulysses for so many years. As the closest cadre to Ulysses, he had witnessed such things happen before.

Ulysses at that time, like Koshei now, fell into self-doubt and self-blame.

But at that time Ulysses had Christina by his side. She was the medicine that comforted him and the only one who could make him sober and cheer up again.

But looking at Koshei now, he has nothing, but has to bear the pressure alone that is not suitable for a man of his age.

Indeed, the Cascade family needs him now.

But he hasn't really grown up yet.

He is not strong enough.

He was just... imitating Ulysses, trying to be a good godfather.

"Don't worry, I'll go see Jose," Koshe waved his hand and said, "Protect your family, Loft, I don't want to see anyone die because of me again."

Looking at Koshe's departing back, Loft wanted to say something, but he couldn't say it for a moment.

In the end, he could only shut up, continue to hug his wife and children, and comfort them silently.

……

Koshe came to the jazz club. He had just talked to Jose on the phone and learned that the other party was there and was looking after the place.

"godfather."

The gang members standing guard at the club door greeted him, and he just raised his hand in response.

The gang members opened the door for him and he walked in.

The club was still filled with a unique and elegant atmosphere as always. A small orchestra was playing soft music on the stage, and people like aristocrats were sitting in the audience, chatting about something and occasionally laughing.

Koshe looked around the club and quickly found Jose. This guy was so tall that he stood out from the crowd, even when he was sitting.

He walked towards it, slowly avoiding other people on the way, and soon arrived at the table where Jose was.

"Hmm? Godfather, you're here, what's the matter——"

Jose noticed Koshe's arrival. He turned around and was about to say something when Koshe suddenly pulled out his gun.

He saw an unexpected guy, Koshei, who rushed forward, grabbed the collar of the man sitting across from Jose's table, and put the gun to his chin.

"Providence..."

Koshe's expression was a little distorted, but it was obvious that he was very angry.

"Hey! Hey! Koshei, calm down! Let's sit down and talk it over!"

José hurriedly stood up and tried to dissuade the extremely impulsive Koshei. In a panic, he even called out Koshei's name.

"Tell me, Providence, are you aware of what your friends in the government are doing?"

But now Koshe obviously didn't want to listen to Jose's words. The muzzle of the gun in his hand was deeply embedded in the flesh of Providence's chin, and his finger was on the trigger.

Providence raised his hands to the sides of his head. He did not resist nor seemed panicked, as if he had anticipated Koshe's reaction when he saw him.

"I know you are angry now, Godfather, but I hope we can talk about this peacefully," Providence said calmly even with the gun pressed against his chin, "This scares me."

Although he said that, there was not even a hint of fear on his face.

But looking at the guests around who had begun to notice the unusual situation, and Jose who was worried that he would act impulsively, Koshe forced himself to calm down.

He released Providence, put away his gun, and sat down at the table.

The guests around also wisely looked away and stopped paying attention to this farce.

Only then did Koshei reveal the purpose of his visit.

"Well, I need to talk to you about your friends in the government, Providence."

Looking at Providence, Koshe said somewhat unkindly.

Chapter 58: Depressed

"Your wine, Godfather."

The waiter brought three glasses of wine to the table. He bowed slightly to Koshei and left with the tray.

Koshe held one of the glasses of wine close to his lips, and the wine flowed down the rim of the glass into his mouth.

His eyes were never taken away from Providence.

"It seems that you don't trust me very much, Godfather."

Providence felt the gaze from Koshei, he looked at the wine glass on the table helplessly and said.

"Why do you think you can still gain my trust now?"

Koshei slammed the glass on the table with a loud sound, just like his anger.

"If you are angry and hateful, you are really pitiful," Providence said with a wry smile, not sure whether it was sarcasm or emotion. "But in fact, if you are kind, loving, and peaceful, you may appear more noble, and I will sincerely respect you."

"What do you want?" Koshei couldn't listen to Providence's words at all. He shook his head, pursed his lips, and asked, "Forgiveness? Now? After your damn government friends did this?"

"No, that's not what I meant—"

"Do you know how that girl's family feels? Hmm? Have you seen their expressions?" Koshe interrupted Providence's explanation forcefully. He said excitedly, "The girl's brother is only six or seven years old and doesn't understand the world, but he has to face such a reality. His expression is the same as mine when I lost my loved ones."

"Godfather, calm down..."

"You can't possibly understand because you haven't experienced that. You don't know what it feels like, but you still want me to let go of my hatred, huh?" Koshe stood up. He ignored the gazes of the people around him and looked straight at Providence. "I thought you would be different from those beasts, but I was wrong. In the final analysis, you are just a running dog of the government."

"...Actually, you are wrong about one thing, Godfather." Providence was silent for a moment, and then he said, "You said I was a running dog, but in fact I am not a dog at all. I... am just a livestock."

"What do you mean?"

"Once upon a time, when I first came to Syracuse, I was lost in dreams, my heart was high and I felt that life was full of hope," Providence's mouth slightly raised, his eyes a little blurry, "A friend of mine works in the government, and he used his connections to bring me, a Liberia native, into the team, and I slowly climbed to the position of a senator with my knowledge."

"……continue."

Koshei's mood gradually calmed down. He lit a cigarette and listened quietly to Providence's narration.

"Yes, I was once like you, intolerant of evil and wanted to eradicate it from this country, but I failed," Providence's tone became depressed, "because I found that the real evil is actually ourselves. I can't stop my colleagues, and the so-called justice is just my own talk. The life I once dreamed of is completely different from this hell on earth."

"Those who walk the path of justice will endure hardships and finally receive their reward, but if they fall, they will fall into hell like Lucifer. I remember seeing this sentence in a book before... It's a bit like you."

Koshe exhaled smoke, frowned, and said.

"In fact, these days, I don't understand one thing, Godfather," Providence waved his hand to disperse the smoke that filled his face and said, "The people of Syracuse respect you and love you, but why do you accept this respect and love with such a gloomy and solemn attitude?"

"...You know, there's a saying that the sewer is the conscience of a city," Koshe thought for a moment and replied, "But now I see clearly that the city is another kind of sewer, and what flows in the sewer is blood. This city is like a slaughterhouse full of screams, full of adultery and sin at night. When this sewer is finally destroyed, all the bad guys will drown. The accumulated crimes of their sex and murder will drown them."

"With all due respect, Godfather, I think you may be taking all this too darkly."

After hearing what Koshe said, Providence said with some objection.

"Of course I know, but I'm not talking about the citizens of Syracuse," Koshei put out his cigarette butt in the ashtray and continued, "I'm referring to the beasts in your government. I have to say that in today's society, your existence is simply a chronic corrosive agent that corrodes this country."

"It seems... the differences between us are not ordinary," Providence stroked his forehead helplessly and said, "Although I can understand you, Godfather."

Providence also stood up. He and Koshe looked at each other straight in the eyes. There was no tension between them, but it wasn't much better either.

"Sometimes, we should learn to be a little dumber. Those fabricated lies are still very meaningful to us. At least I think so..." Providence nodded and extended his hand to Koshe. "I am very happy to meet you formally today, Godfather."

Koshe looked at his outstretched hand and hesitated for a moment.

Of course he knew that Providence was different from those beasts, but it was still a bit reluctant for him to accept so quickly that someone from the government camp was on the same side as him.

But after a moment, he still shook Providence's hand.

A brief conversation and a handshake also mean the mutual understanding between the two people.

"Also, from a friend's perspective, I suggest you have a good talk with that girl," Providence said to Koshe suddenly when they let go and were about to leave. "You need her, and she deserves it."

Having said this, he quickly slipped out of the club.

Looking at Providence's departing figure through the glass, Koshei opened his lips slightly, as if he was about to say something.

Finally, he couldn't help laughing.

"This guy... is unexpectedly interesting."

"Yeah, yeah, I knew you and Puro would get along well."

Joser, who had not spoken a word the entire time, now shamelessly interjected.

"It seems that you have a good relationship with him, Jose." Koshe stopped laughing and stared at Jose with some ill intentions. "Why don't you tell me what you were thinking about bringing a government official to the club? Are you afraid that the government won't find out?"

Although Koshe said this, Jose was not worried about being blamed.

Because Koshei now seemed to be in a good mood. He hadn't laughed for a long time since the death of Godfather Ulysses.

Koshe sat down again, picked up the wine glass, and drank the wine with a slight smile.