You don't even want to call me godfather

"laugh--"

As soon as Lisa said this, Iris couldn't help laughing first. She covered her mouth, trying her best to suppress her laughter, and her shoulders shook uncontrollably.

"Well... it's just a gift from a friend. Don't worry about it." Koshe was a little embarrassed. But looking at Lisa who asked a strange question but looked unexpectedly cute, he took two steps forward and half-knelt in front of her. "I heard from Iris that you are my cousin, Lisa?"

"Well... Sister Iris told Lisa before that Lisa's mother is Aunt Christina's sister, so..." Lisa lowered her head shyly, looking up at Koshe's face for a long time before she stammered, "Brother...Brother?"

For a moment, the room fell silent.

There was no sound, it was so quiet that it was a little scary. Even Lisa began to wonder if she had said something wrong.

“Um…” Koshei lowered his head, his eyes covered by his drooping hair. He covered his face with his hands and sniffed, “Sorry, I’m a little…”

At this moment, Koshe felt a hand touching his hair. He raised his head and looked at Lisa in disbelief as she stretched out a hand and gently placed it on his head.

"Ah! Sorry!" Seeing Koshe's complicated expression, Lisa suddenly withdrew her hand and said a little aggrievedly, "Well... I saw that my brother seemed very sad, so..."

"No, it's okay." Koshe shook his head and smiled bitterly. He seemed to suddenly think of something, and reached into his pocket to fumble around, and finally took out something. "By the way, when I came here just now, I wanted to bring a gift for Lisa, but it seems... this is all I have left. I hope Lisa doesn't mind."

It was a rose-bronze pocket watch hung on a thin gold chain.

"Li...Lisa won't mind it! Since it's a gift from my brother..."

Lisa was talking when she suddenly paused. She raised her head and looked at Iris beside her, as if asking for consent.

And Iris smiled and nodded.

Lisa took the pocket watch carefully. She looked at Koshei from time to time, as if she was worried that one of her actions would make him unhappy.

But just when Lisa's little hand touched Koshe's hand, Koshe's expression suddenly froze.

In his eyes, Lisa at this moment was exactly the same as when he first met Destiny as a child.

The big hand touched the small hand, and the past events with Destiny kept flashing before his eyes.

"!"

Koshei suddenly stood up and took two steps back uncontrollably.

There was fear in his eyes as he looked at Lisa, who was confused, and breathed rapidly.

"Koshei? What's wrong with you?"

Iris saw that something was wrong with Koshei, so she stepped forward, put her arm around his shoulder, and asked with concern.

"No, I..." Koshe panted. He didn't know why Lisa reminded him of Destiny. But seeing Lisa holding the pocket watch with some fear, he kept shaking his head, "Sorry... I have something else to do, so I'll leave first..."

After saying that, he broke free from Iris's hands and walked outside without looking back.

Iris looked at Lisa with an apologetic look, and then she immediately followed him out.

"Koshei! What's wrong with you?" She quickly caught up with Koshei at the stairs, looked at the beads of cold sweat oozing from his forehead, and asked in confusion, "It's just a meeting with Lisa, why are you so nervous?"

"No, sorry, Iris..." Koshe stroked the handrail of the stairs, swallowed, and bit his lip. "I'm still not ready. Next time... I'll come to see Lisa when I'm more stable."

After saying that, Koshei rushed straight out of the welfare home regardless of Iris's attempts to keep him.

"Wait--"

Iris's hand stopped in mid-air. She looked at Koshe's distraught back, and then glanced at Lisa who was standing at the stairs upstairs and looking at her nervously.

In the end, she chose to go upstairs to comfort Lisa.

Chapter 5: Hallucinations after drinking

Koshe pretended to be calm along the way and responded to the greetings from passers-by one by one.

He restrained himself from looking at those people's faces. At this time, no matter who it was, in his eyes, they might see the face of Destiny.

He fled back home, trying to shut himself out of everything.

There were two bottles of whiskey on the living room table, no doubt brought by Loft from the conference room.

"Ha ha……"

Koshe gasped and swallowed, trying to calm himself down, but looking at the whiskey on the table, he couldn't help but pick it up.

He walked slowly to the study and sat down behind the desk.

"Click——"

The cap of the wine bottle was unscrewed, and the golden wine flowed down the esophagus. The bitter taste irritated Koshe's throat. He slammed the bottle on the table and held his head in pain.

"what……"

If this continues, when will it end?

Koshei blamed himself in his heart while drinking gulps of wine.

It hadn't snowed for a few days, and the sunlight shone through the thick clouds, through the stained glass windows, and into the study.

The gloomy light embraced him but did not bring any warmth. The bitter liquid kept stimulating his taste buds and his consciousness began to become a little fuzzy.

"are you tired?"

In a trance, the slightly drunk Koshe seemed to hear Destiny's voice.

He looked up in surprise and saw Destiny standing at the door of the study, looking at him with the same common smile he had when he was alive.

"Destiny?"

Koshei supported himself on the desk and stood up. Even though he realized that this was just an illusion, he still wanted to run towards the study door.

But he stumbled and almost tripped over the corner of the desk, and his cane fell at his feet. However, he had no time to care about it. He just looked at Destiny who was right in front of him and walked towards her quickly.

"Um... Koshe, are you back?" At this moment, Iris appeared at the door of the study. "I saw that your door was not closed, so -"

But before Iris could finish her words, she saw Koshei stumbling towards her and suddenly hugging her.

"Eh? Koshei? You——"

"Destiny..." Koshe could no longer hear Iris' words. In his eyes, the figures of Destiny and Iris overlapped, "You're back... You're back..."

Iris opened her lips slightly, and the words she was about to ask were swallowed back in an instant.

Looking at Koshei who rested his chin on her shoulder, Iris sighed secretly, feeling the helplessness and sadness of the big boy at the moment.

Then she hugged Koshei as well.

"I felt like I had a very long nightmare, Destiny... I dreamed that I attended your funeral... I dreamed that I shot my friend..." Koshe buried his face in Iris's shoulder. Under the influence of alcohol, he treated what he had experienced as a dream and confided to her, "This dream was really long... and very realistic... I..."

"It's all right, Koshei, it's all right, it's all over."

Iris patted Koshe's back gently, trying her best to imitate Destiny's tone to comfort him.

But she didn't know that in Koshe's eyes, she was no different from Destiny. Even if there was a little intention to deceive him, Koshe had already regarded her as Destiny.

So no matter what she said, Koshei would listen attentively.

"...Will you leave me, Destiny?" After a long while, Koshe suddenly asked, "Just like I sent Anjie away... will you leave me?"

"No, I won't, don't worry." Although Iris was curious about what Koshe said about sending Anjie away, she knew that now was not the time to ask these questions. She smelled the alcohol on Koshe and saw the empty bottle on the desk. She knew what had happened to make Koshe like this, so she said, "Like you said, this is all just a dream. You are drunk, Koshe, you need to sleep for a while."

"No, no..." Koshe heard this, but suddenly left Iris's shoulder, "We still need to allocate personnel to departments within the government..."

"It's okay, Koshei, there's no need to rush this matter. The personnel have all been approved from other families."

"But……"

"It's okay to take a short break. You've been very busy in the past month." Iris held down Koshei who was trying to leave her body, stared at his dazed eyes seriously, and persuaded him, "Koshei, just take a day off."

Listening to Iris' words, there seemed to be a glimmer in Koshe's eyes. He looked at Iris' face, wondering what he was thinking.

After a long time, he narrowed his eyes and glanced at the ground to one side.

"Ah... if that's the case, then today... let's take a short break..."

Koshe's body seemed to be exhausted. He leaned on Iris's body and walked slowly towards the folding bed beside him.

Just like Ω who had just arrived, Koshei lay straight on it. He looked at the ceiling in a daze, and then shifted his gaze to Iris who was half-crouching beside him.

"Destiny...can I trouble you for something..." Koshe looked a little sleepy. He looked at Iris listlessly and stretched out a hand to her, "Can you...hold my hand while I fall asleep..."

Iris was stunned, a trace of reluctance appeared on her expression. Looking at the hand that Koshe extended, she held it with both hands without hesitation.

"Don't worry, Koshei, I'll always hold your hand," Iris held his hand and pressed it against her forehead, "Don't worry that I'll leave, I'll always be here with you."

After hearing what Iris said, Koshei's mouth curled up slightly, but his smile was a little bitter. Feeling the warmth on the palms and backs of his hands, he slowly closed his eyes with relief.

"Thank you, Iris."

Almost the next moment after he finished speaking, Koshe fell asleep.

Iris was left sitting there, somewhat at a loss, looking at Koshe's peaceful sleeping face. Thinking back to when he had just called out her name, she always felt a sense of shame stuck in her heart.

She didn't know when Koshei woke up, but she might understand why he didn't reveal this until he fell asleep.

That was... a deception to himself, even though he knew she was not Destiny, Destiny was just an illusion created by alcohol.

Iris knew that Koshei was not a fool, nor was he someone who had a particularly low alcohol tolerance, but that was precisely why she felt uncomfortable about it.

Because Koshe really wanted to get himself drunk so as to immerse himself in a world with Destiny.

Even such a world is fleeting.

Chapter 6 Vultures and Pythons

This was the former training ground of the Cascade family. Before the family purge, this place was only open to members of the Cascade family.

But after the family purge, the site became a wasteland and no one was allowed to enter, not even members of the Cascade family.

Because this is where the later wolf hunters concentrated their training.

Koshe, who was about thirteen or fourteen years old, stood in the training ground, looking at the dagger in his hand in a daze.

It was still a lucid dream as usual. Destiny in front of him was facing away from him, training with his sword.

"Koshei, why did you stop?"

It was a familiar voice. Koshe turned around in the direction of the voice and saw his father standing behind him with a cane, and his mother standing beside him.

Everything was the same as before, his family was by his side, there was no quarrel, no death.

But his awake brain kept reminding Koshei that this was just a dream, and all the beautiful things would disappear after he woke up.

So he didn't dare to respond, because he was afraid that he would get lost in this happiness, and when he returned to reality, this happiness would turn into loneliness, which would affect his mood.

"What's wrong, Koshe?" His mother saw that something was wrong with him. She walked to his side and gently held his hand. "Are you tired? Or are you hurt?"

Hearing his mother's voice, Koshei felt a heavy feeling in his heart. He raised his head uncontrollably and met his mother's worried gaze.

"No, mother, I'm fine..."

Koshe's lips trembled slightly. The things in his dream were so similar to everything he remembered, turning over and over again, testing his rationality.

"If you feel tired, today's training ends here, and then go home and have a good rest."

The mother's words were so gentle that for a moment, Koshei almost indulged in this dream.

But he lowered his head, looked at the ground under his feet for a long time, and shook his head.

"But where is home?"

Koshe asked, seemingly talking to himself.

Farewell is the sadness of one person and the loneliness of a group of people, and it is also everything that one must experience to grow up.

But now, he is the only one left in this family, and he doesn't understand what the meaning of this kind of growth is.

But as he asked his question, the surrounding environment seemed to change.

He could not feel his mother's hand holding his, and when he raised his head again, both his father and mother had disappeared.

Only Destiny in front of him stopped swinging her sword. She slowly turned around and met Koshe's eyes.

"Are you tired, brother?"

But the Destiny in front of him was her grown-up self, looking at Koshe with concerned eyes, and Koshe at this time had also turned into her grown-up appearance.