Brother, is there a problem with me being a magical girl?

As Liuli spoke, her clear and ethereal voice seemed to be singing some ancient ballad. Her body seemed weightless, and the smile on the girl's face was always so pure. She opened her arms and slowly approached Lin Ran's body...

If you look at it from a distance at this time, the scene is simply like an illusory ghost trying to possess humans...

When Liuli's arms were about to wrap around Lin Ran's body, the young man who had been silent all this time finally took action.

Lin Ran quickly took a step back, and then vetoed it with an extremely firm tone.

"What you said makes sense, but I refuse."

The moment the voice fell, the girl floating in the air shattered into pieces like shattered glass. When the world in front of her eyes became clear again, that petite figure no longer existed.

When everything returned to calm, Liuli's last words echoed in Lin Ran's ears.

"Then go, I will always watch you by your side..."

The voice fell, but everything in front of me seemed so illusory and real.

Chapter 29 Meng Qianran

Today was the first day I returned to the orphanage after I decided to lose my identity as a magical girl. Meng Qianran stood at the familiar No. [-] bus stop, waiting silently...

The world in front of me is full of people coming and going, the traffic is surging, the noise in my ears is still the same as yesterday, the seats behind me are full of old men and women, they are sitting together, chatting, talking about homework...

Meng Qianran was standing alone in front, no one was standing side by side with her, behind her was a group of elderly people who were talking enthusiastically, and beside her was the bleak cold wind blowing by.

Meng Qianran couldn't help tightening the thin clothes on her body, and looked at the end of the road at the same time, hoping that the No. [-] bus would arrive as soon as possible.

Finally, as the huge figure protruded from the end of the road, and then it occupied a larger and larger size in the field of vision. The shining number seven on the front of the car was like a bright light guiding the way home, which made Meng Qianran's heart warm a bit.

Maybe it won't be so cold after I go back, maybe everyone in the orphanage can understand me, maybe the old director will still smile and pat himself on the shoulder as usual to tell himself that it doesn't matter...

With such thoughts in mind, the ordinary and lonely girl stepped onto the two steps of the bus station, and then skillfully put the two-yuan coin into the coin collector.

The bus was almost full of people, and the congested space made the atmosphere in the bus extremely turbid, or because of the impact of the transformation, Meng Qianran's sharp eyes found the bus on the bus. There is only one unremarkable seat left.

She walked over quickly, and then sat on the bus chair. The solid leaning on the back made the girl relax her tense body.

Looking at the scene outside the car that gradually began to move slowly, her heart began to recall the past of last night.

.........

The lights in the command room of the War Strategy Bureau were bright, and Meng Qianran was not used to the glaring brightness. At that time, she stood in front of the desk, bowed her head and said nothing like a child who had made a mistake.

And what was on the table at this moment was the heart of magic that she had just taken out from her bosom. To be honest, she had thought about it for a long time before making such a decision. Becoming a magical girl may be the greatest affirmation and honor she has received so far in her life, but now she wants to abandon this honor...

Making such a decision was not made on impulse, but after weighing the pros and cons for a long time. I recalled that day when the huge head of a strange beast was not far from my eyes, and the innocent family of five on the street... But it was swallowed by that ruthless thousand-toothed mouth...

Fresh blood sprayed in the sky, falling down like a rain of blood. She tremblingly looked at the bright red stain on her arm, and felt the indescribable fear and fear in her heart.

The instinct of the body drove him to escape from this place, but the cries of the child on the ground awakened his last sobriety.

She can't escape now, even if she wants to run, at least she must run with the child on the street...

She turned her head tremblingly, looking at the child squatting on the street who kept howling and crying, and the huge body of the strange beast kept approaching its location.

The child was still crying, and the ground was trembling because of the huge body of the monster. Meng Qianran knew that he had no time to hesitate at that time, so he used up the last ounce of courage in his body to fly to the innocent child, then picked him up, and then fled to the distance with all the strength in his body...

Meng Qianran is very clear that she has never been a brave person, but she is by no means a bad person. In life, she will try her best to do some good things within her power to repay the orphanage for teaching and nurturing her. At the same time, when facing those difficult problems in life, she chooses to escape more...

Perhaps it was the influence left over from her childhood. She always stood in the narrow room of the orphanage and looked at the world through the small window. In her eyes, the world was only as big as the window, and her heart was also the size of the window. I can only hold this kind of world...

The children outside the window are always accompanied by their parents and relatives. They may cry or make noise, but their petite hands are always held by a pair of big hands. A child is like a boat, and every boat is drifting on the sea, constantly moving forward to experience those unknown lives.

But not every boat is the same. There are parents and children. There is always an anchor on the boat. In the face of those strong winds and waves that cannot be resisted, the anchor on the boat will be lowered into the sea. That is a reassuring feeling. The weight always allows the boat to survive the attack of wind and waves safely, but what about the boat without anchor?Maybe it was overturned by the waves on a stormy night, or the boat survived by luck, but its hull itself was already riddled with holes...

Obviously, Meng Qianran is the one without an anchor among the many boats. Even though she was lucky enough to be adopted by the orphanage and brought up, even so, it is still impossible to replace the missing anchor.

Perhaps because she has never felt the weight and peace of mind from the "anchor" in her heart, Meng Qianran always feels that her life is always full of uneasiness. She never dared to compete with children of the same age for anything, and she was unwilling to face those too big storms...

Because she has no anchor, she is afraid that in case of an unknown night, she will be swallowed by the wind and waves on the way forward without anchor.

But even so, such a humble she still has her own ideas. Perhaps he used to be a boat without an anchor, and he never had a peaceful night at sea when he was growing up, but this does not mean that she herself cannot be an anchor.

Behind her, there is also a boat that is the same as her, but now she has no need to move forward, and if she does not need to move forward, it means that she will rarely face the unknown wind and waves ahead. Although she has lost the opportunity to explore forward, turning her own weight into an anchor and letting others enjoy it is not also a kind of sustenance for the desire to move forward?

"Ding dong, I hope the Children's Welfare Institute has arrived. Passengers who arrive at the station, please get off, thank you."

The emotionless electronic reminder sounded in the bus, and the familiar station name pulled Meng Qianran back from her thoughts. The girl took a deep breath. Although she had already made a decision, she was still afraid when she was about to face her former companions in the orphanage...

Whether her decision can be understood by them is still a mystery. Even though Sister Jiang promised herself that she would not publish her matter this time on the Internet, the girl who has always been lonely and fragile still has no idea.

Will the orphanage that used to be his temporary safe haven reveal the original tenderness to himself at this time?

In any case, I still have to face the results of my own decisions. I want to be an anchor for others, that is, I want others to see the impact I can bear.

The girl pursed her lips and gently walked towards the orphanage that was familiar to her but now she was somewhat unknown.

(This chapter is more used to portray Meng Qianran, who is an important role in the later part of this volume. Because there is nothing written about her in the early stage, she is just a one-liner, so this chapter focuses on describing the psychology and experience of this girl, as well as the contradictions and problems she faces now. I am not very good at psychological descriptions, so the writing may be a bit confusing, or people’s understanding is not very clear.

wrong chapter

This piece is wrongly written, please don’t read it, it’s because the chapters in my other book are posted in the wrong place, don’t read it!

(>﹏<)

Chapter 30 Accusation

The sky was gloomy, and the sky was already filled with dark clouds, heralding the arrival of thunderstorms. Meng Qianran stood quietly at the entrance of the orphanage, looking at the glass door, but she found that she had never I never thought that one day this door, which has been opened and closed many times by itself, will appear so heavy today...

It was so heavy that I couldn't even have the courage to reach out and open it.

After a long silence, the girl finally opened the ordinary glass door. The moment the door was opened, a familiar smell rushed over her face. It was the smell of her own home, but why is this feeling so cold and biting today?

The girl didn't dare to continue her inner guesses and doubts, she just kept her head down and walked forward blindly, her face could not be reflected on the old and new tile floor, all she could see was the blurred outline of the black shadow... …

"Hey, did you see it? There is someone..."

"Oh, wait, isn't that Meng girl?"

"Hmph, you're still dreaming girl, you call me kind, but you don't know what kind of person you are in reality?"

"Oh, it's not good to say that, no matter how you say it, he was once a child in our orphanage..."

"What's wrong with it? Oh, God gave her such a good opportunity. She doesn't cherish it. She is really a shameless person. I really can't find any good things about her body, except for a charming face. come out……"

"This, alas..."

Suddenly, the whispering voices of the two nurses from the orphanage came from beside their ears. Although they were whispers, their voices were not low. Meng Qianran walked aside and heard them clearly. She silently He clenched his fists tightly, but let them go suddenly, without any rebuttal, just quietly walked past them and walked forward...

The staff who walked past the orphanage in front is the council hall, and behind it is the living area and dormitory area for the children of the orphanage. When the girl's youthful figure gradually walked into the children's gathering place, there was still some laughter and noise in the environment, and it became quiet in an instant. Everyone put down what they were doing, turned their heads and stared at Meng Qianran, with that special gaze, as if there was something filthy on her body that couldn't be washed away...

The girl was a little frightened by these gazes, and her body was trembling imperceptibly. Facing these strange but familiar gazes, all she could do was lower her head and move forward silently.

"Hey, isn't that Meng Qianran? How come you have the face to come back today?"

I don't know who made such a start, and then, the slightly silent environment was broken in an instant, and the children's discussions overshadowed all other voices.

"Oh, it's really her. I really don't know what she thinks when she becomes a deserter..."

"Who knows? Maybe it's because I can't get along in the group of magical girls anymore. If I think about it, I know how a noble magical girl can be held by an orphan who no one wants?"

A girl who was about the same age as Meng Qianran, with pock marks on her face, said with jealousy or ridicule, but she didn't realize the unwanted orphan she was talking about, and she was also accompanying herself by the way. insulted.

"How could this be? Because before, I thought Sister Meng was pretty good. I was in an orphanage, and she often helped me with things I didn't understand or had difficulties with."

"That's why you think she's good because you're a stunned young man. Maybe it's another... well, yes, what about the white lotus that adults talk about? It's just a white-eyed wolf who looks pure and friendly but is selfish inside."

"Oh, did any of you have anything to do with her before? Think about it, don't be implicated by her, in case some good family wants to take us in, I heard that you once had a close relationship with a deserter in this orphanage Contact, no one will accept you anymore."

"Yes, yes, it's better not to touch her, even if she has helped you, is your own life important in the future?"

"Oh, I really know people, know faces, but don't know my heart. I didn't expect Sister Meng to be so pure and friendly on the outside. In fact, alas, let's not talk..."

Discussion, ridicule, accusation, those so-called non-substantial offensive words are being spoken from Meng Qianran's former partners and children. Every word is like a cold needle, piercing into the girl's loneliness and weakness. Every word made Meng Qianran's face paler.

She was under the attack of the stormy public opinion in the once safe haven. Even when she grew up, she was still the boat without an anchor, swaying in the strong wind and waves, constantly hovering between the edge of life and death...

Even if the hull of the boat has been corroded by the waves of the years, so what?This still couldn't stop those more small boats from setting off bigger waves and throwing the dilapidated ship in the center of the storm into a pile of debris and sinking to the bottom of the sea.

People are social animals, and they are also a stupid group that can be easily misled and incited. Once such remarks are fermented in it, they will multiply and divide like cancer cells that will not die and stop until they completely destroy the person concerned.

Amidst this massive crusade, Meng Qianran had no room to justify or refute, because her voice would only be covered by the louder waves, even if she made it, no one would hear her. All she can do now is to remain silent. To bear, to bear, to look forward to the quick end of the storm...

Finally, something seemed to have happened in the group of children. A child's voice overwhelmed everything and echoed throughout the hall like an imperial decree.

"Meng Qianran, the old dean is looking for you, hurry to his office..."

The voice was so blunt and indifferent, as if Meng Qianran had been branded a sinner the moment she returned to the orphanage. In the eyes of outsiders, the clothes she was wearing now were no different from prison uniforms.

As if hearing the name of the old dean who was as kind as a parent in the past, Meng Qianran's focus that had dissipated and was about to disappear gathered again, and the vision in front of her gradually became clearer.

Yes, I can't be defeated by these arguments and accusations, at least the old dean is still waiting for me in his familiar office, isn't he?If Guo is a kind and kind old dean, he will definitely understand himself, right?

Meng Qianran asked herself these questions over and over again in her heart. Although she couldn't give an answer, she still faintly believed in the old dean.

Finally, under the girl's fast-moving pace as if she was running away, the demonic voices in her ears gradually disappeared, and the environment in the corridor was extremely quiet, and all she could hear was her own footsteps as she ran fast.

At that moment, the girl stopped and squatted in the corner of the wall. She was panting heavily, her heart was beating violently, and she could clearly hear the frightened beating even without feeling it...

Hold on, you must go to the old dean's office to speak clearly, even if the former partners here can't tolerate you, you must wait until you take Tianling out...

In this way, relying on this belief, the girl slowly stood up while supporting the wall. She continued to draw the little strength in her body, and continued to move forward against the wall.

The cold tile walls made people feel no sense of security. Under the stimulation of such a cold, the hands that had no warmth had already become cold at this time. The door of the dean's office was in front of him. Through the window on the door, the warm light shone in the dark corridor, giving the girl a bit of strength to replenish her tired heart.

He walked forward with difficulty, knocked on the door, and then bit his lips tightly.

The originally pale lips were congested due to the violent squeezing. From the outside, perhaps this move made the girl look more bloody.

Meng Qianran never wants outsiders to see her haggard and weak side. Maybe she has always been weak, but she doesn't want others to see her like this.

"Come in, the door is unlocked."

The old voice inside the door was still clear. The girl took a few deep breaths outside the door, and then mustered up the courage to push the door open. As the door opened, the orange light illuminated the girl's dark vision.

This is a familiar and warming light, not as glaring as the white light in the command room of the War Strategy Bureau. Meng Qianran walked in slowly, and then raised her head to look at the kind old man on the desk with his head bowed down to record documents.

The old dean is already 76 years old. Originally, it was time to retire at this age, but the orphanage has not found a suitable candidate for the new dean. The old dean is not worried about the children in the orphanage, so he has been staying down until now.

As if knowing that the girl had come in, the old dean raised his head, adjusted the reading glasses on the bridge of his nose, and showed that kind smile that was familiar to the girl and felt warm.

"coming."

The old dean smiled, his face full of wrinkles and weather marks was so thin, his gray hair and eyebrows made people sigh the ruthlessness of time.

"Dean, I'm back, sorry..."

Speaking of this, Meng Qianran couldn't help lowering her long black hair to cover her face when she originally raised her head, but the crystal tears couldn't stop falling.

The moment she saw the old dean clearly, the guilt in her heart was on the verge of breaking out. The old dean looked older. Was it because of his own affairs that he was overworked?The old dean placed so much hope and love on her, but he still failed them, and it's no wonder that so many children in the orphanage criticized and commented...

A cowardly deserter like himself deserves such accusations.

"There is nothing to be sorry for. It is your own right to choose to become a magical girl or not. No one can stop you. The dean knows your difficulties and worries, so I don't blame you."

The kind and gentle voice of the old dean came again. Hearing the reassuring voice, the tears in the girl's eyes became more turbulent. The crystal tears blurred the vision, and all she could see was the colorful distorted world.

"But... Qianran, the decision is your right to choose, but you have to bear the corresponding price while making the power. It's not that the old dean blames you. I was also a veteran on the battlefield. The fear and desire for life on the battlefield is everyone's most instinctive choice. Everyone is like this, but once you become a deserter, the punishment of the military law will not be eased because of the reason you choose..."

"There is nothing wrong with your own choice, but the judgment made by the army is also not wrong. All freedom of choice can only be carried out within the constraints of laws and rules. Once you touch the bottom line, you must pay the price..."

The old dean looked at the girl he had single-handedly raised in front of him, and felt quite emotional in his heart. While talking about the price to be paid, his voice became extremely heavy.

His hand that was trembling because of old age gently grabbed the gold-wire presbyopic glasses, he slowly took them off, and then put them on the table, wiping away the warm tears in his cloudy eyes with wrinkled hands.

"Let's go, don't take things and accusations in the hospital to heart. The higher-ups in the government have issued an order to thoroughly investigate our orphanage. They suspect that there is a problem with the internal education of the orphanage. If you stay here, you will only be punished even more The possibility of..."

"Let's go, don't come back again, go to a place with few people, start a new life, you are still young, girls are young, there are infinite possibilities, don't miss me, a useless old man..."

The heavy and slightly sad voice of the old dean echoed in the office. The girl kept wiping the tears from her eyes, and the shame and sadness in her heart had already flooded her frail and lonely heart.

Chapter 31 Winding

After the intense sadness swept over, the girl leaned against the wall, trembling and sobbing all over her body. The old dean seemed unwilling to see the girl like this, so he stood up and pushed Meng Qianran into a chair.

"Ugh……"

The wear and tear brought by the years also made this aged body even more decayed. The old dean dragged his tired body back to the chair, and then heaved a long sigh.

"The old dean is old and can't help you much. I don't have much to say. I just hope you can take care of yourself in the future."