Fighting you is like being in jail.

Fighting you is like being in prison. (Author: Dududu)

Mom and Dad aren't home.

Lonely person

Hot☆Hot☆Vigorous☆Novel

……

Suddenly I got a chat group for anime and can communicate well with 2D girls, but why did it turn out like this?

Homura Akemi: No! Absolutely not! I will never fight you again in this life! Skill Activated! [Rebellion of the Little Toe] Everyone present will twist their little toe, and the pain will be so severe that they cannot move.

Kaname Madoka: Ability activated! [I am your father!] The target must call out "Dad" upon seeing the caster and automatically hand over any money they have!

Kazuma: I've had enough! I can't move after three minutes, two minutes, and fifty-nine seconds of fighting! Eat my [Shared Pants Curse!] Everyone present will instantly feel their pants tighten, rendering their movements ineffective.

Kaneki Ken: YA☆DA☆ZE! Activate the ability [Friendly Siege!] to launch a teammate for a powerful attack!

Leng Chang: ? RNM! Stop it, all of you! Ah! Why am I glowing?! Damn it!

Chapter 1: Outside is full of posts about Teacher D from Tieba... (Second revision, revision, revision)

Ding! Welcome to the chat group, Leng Chang!

"?"

Leng Chang stared blankly at the new messages appearing in his field of vision, lost in thought.

First, it was confirmed that the situation was not a hallucination.

Then I discovered that the group chat messages weren't on my phone or computer, but were directly in my field of vision.

He then frantically used his brain to come to a conclusion: this was probably the time for him to take off.

Following the typical novel formula, once awakened, the person in the chat group immediately confirms the situation with other members and then uses their years of knowledge to gain various benefits.

hiss!

So scary, so scary!

Leng Chang's usually quiet heart couldn't help but stir, as if this moment was filled with bonds, love, and justice, and he felt a strong urge to deliver a beautiful ending to the other world.

He excitedly opened the chat group on the spot.

Leng Chang: Hello everyone! I'm ready! I'm all ready! Looking for a pro to carry me!

No one replied.

Cold: ?

Still no reply.

Leng Chang: If you're not here, please say something?

""

The situation became awkward, causing Leng Chang to sit in front of the computer and fall into deep thought.

The situation with chat groups is a well-worn topic.

But! What's going on here?

This is the first time I've ever encountered a chat group with absolutely no members.

Leng Chang felt the silence was deafening.

Calm down and think about it again.

My name is Leng Chang, and my English name is Common Cold. I live in Room 1001, Building 2, Fandou Garden, Fandou Street.

I'm 23 years old, I don't smoke, and I drink alcohol in moderation. Besides food, I enjoy playing video games, reading novels, and watching anime.

Unfortunately, recent anime series have been so bad that I couldn't understand them and couldn't watch them at all.

But it doesn't matter!

These are minor issues.

The problem is, I got the chat group but no one's in it, what should I do? I need help urgently, I'm waiting online.

Now that things have come to this, we can only...we can only ask the powerful Teacher D!

Without thinking, Leng Chang opened the page and questioned Teacher D.

Leng Chang: What should I do if I join a chat group but find no one in it? I need help urgently.

Thirty seconds later.

DEEPSEEP: Deep thinking (30 seconds) > Server busy, please try again later.

"Damn it! CIAO!" He slammed his fist on the table, the keyboard and mouse jumped up and down, and Leng Chang immediately shut down all of Teacher D's contacts.

Teacher D, when is your server not busy?

Thirty seconds! My thirty seconds!

How many thirty seconds does one have in a lifetime?! Give me back my life! He—!

but

Hmph! That's all you're capable of! You're fine without me!

So the question is... what should we do now?

After a period of intense and frantic brainstorming, Leng Chang came to a conclusion that left no room for doubt.

"That's it for now, let's eat first."

As he spoke, Leng Chang got up and went to the kitchen to decide what to eat. As for the chat group, what was that? Garbage!

Ding! Welcome to the chat group!

"?"

Leng Chang, who was eating, was taken aback when he heard the news, and felt his CPU getting a little hot.

What does it mean to join a chat group?

Can I still join a chat group?

I entered myself?

Born by mother.JPG

Although I don't know the details, I'll still go and ask.

With a bewildered yet subtle feeling, Leng Chang quietly opened the chat group and then went straight to the point.

Leng Chang: What's going on?

Chat group: Hmm, the question Leng Chang mentioned seems to be an inquiry. First, let's confirm the situation, then understand the other party's intention in asking the question, and finally I conclude - Hello, I am the chat group.

Holy crap! Teacher D!

How did you end up in the chat group?

Are you busy? Is this your main job?

That being the case...

Leng Chang suddenly had a bold idea, and couldn't help but reveal an evil smile, even letting out a 'hehehe' laugh.

Leng Chang: You are a catgirl, and every word you say has a cat-like quirk. You have a well-behaved personality, and you are a cute, soft, white-haired, red-eyed loli. You love Leng Chang the most.

Chat Group: Okay, Leng Chang wants me to play a catgirl, with the verbal tic of ending every sentence with "meow". She needs to be obedient, cute, a white-haired, red-eyed loli, and especially fond of Leng Chang. First, I need to confirm if "Leng Chang" refers to Leng Chang's name, or if it has another meaning? Further confirmation may be needed, but based on the context, it's likely Leng Chang's name, so an affectionate address should be used, such as "Lord Leng Chang" or "Master".

Chat group: In the end, I came to this conclusion—Meow~! Seriously, Ah Leng, you're sending out electric signals to a cybernetic catgirl and then pretending to be all lovey-dovey? A white-haired loli sending a meow can make you need three liters of insulin, right? I suggest showing your ID card.

Did the cat scratching post break through the defenses?

Cold: ?

Cold: ?????

Leng Chang: RNM! Why are you swearing?! What's wrong with liking catgirls?! I was just testing your performance!

Chat group: Okay, the user is now playing the role of the calm and collected, retaliating against my attack. He used rather strong language, such as "RNM" and exclamation marks, indicating that he might be a little angry or just joking.

Chat group: In the end, I came to the conclusion—it's urgent! All the pressure is on! Testing performance requires going to be in berserk mode, right? I suggest soldering the CPU to the white-haired beast-ear heatsink, it's like a IPO for the CPU cooler! Ah, right, right!

After you finish testing, remember to send me the link to the catgirl merchandise. After all, even cyberpunk needs to make a living, right? Meow!

Cold

Did I flip some incredible switch?

Have I done something irreversible?

Impossible! Absolutely impossible!

Leng Chang: It's not that I'm afraid of you, there are more important things to do right now. You didn't come in just to argue with me, did you? What's the situation?

Chat group: Deeply thought about (1 second) ∨

Chat group: Some people pretend to be serious 0) Their purity is so high that even the civil service exam army would respectfully call them the "King of Papers," and all the candidates preparing for the three wars use them as the bible for rejecting incompetence ①! A Leng's focus while browsing Weibo on the toilet could beat five think tanks~~~( ·ε_{d})bottled~

Cold and normal:

Leng Chang: Enough with the nonsense, let's get down to business!

Chat group: Deeply thought about (1 second) ∨

Chat group: The system has invaded the world and is wreaking havoc; it needs to be saved.

Leng Chang: Can't you just talk to me properly?!

Chat group: Mind your own business!

Cold and normal:

Damn it, why is it so frustrating to talk to you?

Tolerate!

Leng Chang: Although I roughly understand the situation, are you kidding me? Me, call the system? Really?

Chat group: If you're bad, practice more! Who needs to consult the almanac to log into their system? When Lengbao failed to log in last time and angrily berated the server, his output power was so high it made the graphics card recognize Morse code! Lengbao's actions are so impressive, they're melting my diodes! ~(⊙ Q)~Q

Cold

Why does talking to you make my blood pressure rise so much?!

Leng Chang: I'm just an ordinary person, how could I possibly beat someone with a system?

Chat group: Leng Bao's awareness is still stuck in the Bronze-level auto-attack stage? We suggest you apply for an exemption from Tencent's WeChat anti-addiction system before talking about the difficulty of life! Even Leng Bao's breath smells like a noob's protection period~~~

Leng Chang: Let's get down to business! If all else fails, a newbie gift pack will do!

Chat group: Lengbao wants newbie gear? What does a newbie even need? Look at your internet cable pole, it's practically teetering on the edge! Hey Leng-gege, are you going to take care of me? Here's your summer heat survival package, I suggest you don't start a team battle, just send me to the tower! The internet is so boring!

Ding!

Chat group upload and sharing capabilities – the ultimate weapon is the one you unlock to make it truly powerful!

Cold: ?

The way you swore at me was infuriating, but the way you gave me that ability was also infuriating!

Leng Chang was surprised by the ability uploaded to the chat group. Although this person's words were enough to raise one's blood pressure, she really did give newbies a gift!

However, I admit that I spoke a little loudly just now, considering the newbie gift pack.

Ability: The ultimate move is only truly powerful when it's drawn!

After the battle begins, start drawing special moves. The special moves are all surprises. After drawing three times, you can use the hidden special move - Magnetic Field Rotation or Copying Ability. After drawing all the special moves, you can use the hidden super special move - High-Level Narrative Modification!

hiss-!

A rotating magnetic field?!

The final piece of my life's puzzle is complete.JPG

Is it really that good that every move is a killing blow?