The afterlife blew up Gensokyo

The Next Life Will Blow Up Gensokyo Author: Shi Jiuming

"Get out of my way, damn old woman! I'm going to blow up Gensokyo today!!!"

Facing the many BBAs in front of him, Shi Bai made his life declaration with extraordinary determination.

I have no regrets entering the world of Touhou in this life; in the next, I will surely destroy Gensokyo.

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A fun and sophisticated story that completes the history of Gensokyo from scratch, a story about how the Godfather of Gensokyo tried so hard to blow up Gensokyo

Chapter 1 The Most Tragic Time Travel in History

Shi Bai always felt that he was very lucky.

In fact, in his short life of less than seventeen years, he never encountered any bad luck, and everything he did went smoothly.

Let alone getting a perfect score on an English exam by rolling dice and answering multiple-choice questions the whole time, accidentally bumping into someone on the street can make you a hero who steps in to subdue a criminal.

It's as if you carry a fully-leveled lucky aura with you; you can even find money on the ground while bending down to tie your shoelaces.

Shi Bai felt that this kind of life without any challenge was meaningless, so he plunged into the world of anime and games, becoming hopelessly addicted to his various "waifus".

On his seventeenth birthday, after spending the whole day grinding FGO and casually helping a few silly group members in the group to draw more than a dozen SSRs in Onmyoji, Shi Bai went to the balcony to enjoy the comfortable evening breeze, thinking he should go out for some fresh air.

"What a boring life. If only this unchallenging life could be more interesting."

Looking up at the night sky, Shi Bai couldn't help but feel a sense of感慨 (gǎnkǎi, a feeling of deep emotion or reflection).

"I have no regrets about entering the Touhou Project in this life, and I wish to be reborn in Gensokyo in the next. If only I could go to Gensokyo..."

As if summoned by an invisible force, before he could finish speaking, a shooting star flew straight toward him from the night sky.

And then? And then there was no more.

He was struck and killed by a meteor shower that happens only once every millennium. There is probably no one luckier on this planet than him.

Congratulations, Coca-Cola.

..................................................................

On a desolate wasteland strewn with boulders, a boy is fleeing for his life. Behind him, at a leisurely pace, follows a colossal creature that could almost blot out the sky... a dinosaur.

Seemingly panicked and disoriented, the boy tripped over a protruding rock while fleeing, and then smashed his head against a sharp rock. As blood gushed out, he immediately stopped moving.

"???"

Seeing the little creature so decisively commit suicide, the dinosaur tilted its head in confusion. Although it wasn't intelligent enough to understand what was happening, it still wanted to taste the meat that was already in its mouth.

Although the little one in front of me doesn't look like he's made of much meat...

However, when it lowered its massive head, it found that the boy was nowhere to be seen on the rocky beach. Even the conspicuous red had vanished.

"???"

Undeterred, it scratched at the rocky beach with its paws, creating a crisscrossing mess, but still couldn't find any trace of the little one from before.

Meanwhile, about a hundred miles away from this wasteland, Shi Bai suddenly poked his head out from among the leaves and hurriedly spat out all the leaf fragments in his mouth.

"Ptooey, ptooey, ptooey! What is this rubbish? It tastes awful..."

This is an extremely dangerous world, and he had transmigrated to this world three days ago.

To be honest, when Shi Bai first transmigrated to this world, he was utterly shocked. He almost thought he had transmigrated to the Cretaceous period of the dinosaurs and been reborn as a newborn dinosaur.

As for why he thought that way... it was because the place he was in at the time was inside a huge, broken eggshell.

However, after a frantic check of his body and discovering that he was still the same person he was before, even the clothes he was wearing hadn't changed, Shi Bai immediately breathed a sigh of relief.

But he had barely caught his breath when he was mistaken for a dinosaur egg thief and stomped to death by the dinosaur mother.

So, within just five seconds of arriving in this world, he faced his first death, setting a record for the shortest survival time.

This was the first death he had experienced since he came into this world.

Completely bewildered and confused about the current situation, Shi Bai found himself fully resurrected above a river... then he slipped and fell into the river and drowned due to the rapid current.

According to a detailed account of what happened afterward, he died about twenty-three times on that first day. Seventeen of those deaths were caused by him being randomly resurrected next to some terrifying monster, or even being hit on the head.

Although it seems that the pain of death is shielded from him by some force and he cannot feel it at all, dying repeatedly is not a solution.

It took almost three days, during which Shi Bai died more than forty times, before he finally recovered from this continuous cycle of death.

Without a doubt, he had traveled through time, but the world he was in now did not seem to be the dinosaur era he had imagined.

Because during those three days and more than forty deaths, he once came to the head of a blue dragon whose body was hidden in the clouds due to a random resurrection.

Compared to this legendary creature that exists only in mythology, his size is as insignificant as a speck of dust.

...So what kind of ghostly world have I stumbled into?!

Shi Bai was starting to have some doubts about life.

Three days, and a total of 48 deaths, were enough time for him to figure out the resurrection ability he possessed.

Although he doesn't know why he possessed this ability, there's no doubt that it's very useful.

After death, he has three options: resurrect on the spot, resurrect at a random location, or resurrect at a designated resurrection point.

Because he couldn't measure the distance, he didn't know exactly what the area encompassed by this random location was. Also, although he could bind to a respawn point, it seemed that he could only bind to one respawn point at the moment.

...Could it be considered a form of immortality in another sense?

Shi Bai remained relatively optimistic and accepted the current situation quite quickly. However, acceptance was one thing, optimism was another.

The thought of spending countless years alone in a world where even humans had not yet been born filled Shi Bai with an urge to curse.

After three days of careful consideration, and drawing on his experiences and memories from his previous seventeen years, Shi Bai finally pinpointed the culprit to the wish he made to a shooting star that night.

My time travel is definitely related to that meteor. Perhaps even my innate immortality is due to that meteor.

"Hmm, let me think... assuming I really did travel to Gensokyo... I've read the official artbook and works like Yumezuki Shou Kourindou..."

Leaning against the trunk of a large tree whose name he didn't know, Shi Bai seemed to have a headache and scratched his hair with his hand.

"Countless billions of years ago, the gods created the earth... The struggle for survival turned the last ocean into filth, and the victors, carrying the filth, stepped onto the land, which then became filthy as well... The rocks were uprooted to become the heavens, and all life on the land was wiped out, leading to the third mass extinction. This was a scene that even Eirin Yagokoro had never witnessed, which is enough to prove that the time was extremely ancient..."

As they were talking, the person suddenly fell silent.

Half a minute later, a mournful cry came from the woods.

"This time travel is way too much, you bastard!!!"

Chapter Two: The First Step in Doubting Life Begins with Small Things

To be honest, Shi Bai didn't know exactly where he was or what location he was in, but some things didn't need to be known too much.

First of all, there are dinosaurs here, so it can probably be related to the Cretaceous period in some way.

Secondly, there are mythical creatures from ancient legends here, so it can probably be linked to legends in some way.

Finally, since I'm here, I guess I can be associated with... silliness in some way?

Sitting cross-legged under a big tree with his arms folded, Shi Bai looked thoughtful.

Just as someone who is bad at directions usually doesn't think of themselves as such, someone who is silly naturally doesn't think of themselves as silly.

Back then, he could easily pull several SSRs in the game and complete a full build with just one 10-pull. However, many silly netizens left sarcastic comments under his posts, such as "When it comes to luck, it's always the case whoever runs out first goes first."

At the time, he naturally disregarded those comments and even smugly remarked that this was the difference between a lucky person and an unlucky person, but now, thinking about it carefully... he might have been getting his comeuppance.

"The jealousy of countless netizens turned into a torrent of resentment that swept across the sky, altering the trajectory of a meteor while I was out on the balcony enjoying the cool air, and crushing me to death... Human nature has deteriorated to this day!!"

Recalling his experiences over the past three days since his transmigration, Shi Bai looked up to the sky and sighed.

He was still wearing the same clothes he was wearing before he was crushed to death: a T-shirt, a jacket, and jeans.

He was actually glad that he was wearing shoes instead of slippers or sandals, otherwise his situation would have been even more difficult in such harsh conditions.

Each time he dies and respawns, the items he left behind disappear, and then everything on his person is refreshed. The pattern is somewhat similar to the respawn mechanism in a game, which minimizes the possibility of him running around naked, but also eliminates his idea of ​​farming resources by dying.

"A bunch of keys, a ballpoint pen, a pack of toilet paper, a watch, a cell phone with 90% battery... and an egg that I brought back from my three deaths."

Shi Bai took out all the potentially useful items he was carrying and laid them out in a row on the soft ground in front of him, his face full of conflicted emotions.

"So here's the question... aside from the egg that should be edible, what use are these things in this world?"

The place he was in now was a place he had randomly selected through more than 40 deaths over three days, which could barely be considered a safe place. At least he hadn't seen any dangerous large creatures or highly poisonous animals around, so he simply made it his respawn point. Anyway, things like respawn points can be unbound and rebound at any time.

However, although it is said to be safe, it is only a triangular area surrounded by three towering ancient trees that have grown close together for many years. While it is not exactly safe, it is still much better than other places.

"It's a pity I don't smoke. If I did, I could have brought an extra lighter..."

After muttering something under his breath, Shi Bai swept the clutter in front of him aside and deliberately placed the egg, which was slightly larger than a regular egg, to his right front.

This egg was the result of his exploration this morning. Among the three locations where he died and randomly respawned, this was the only one he got that was of some value. Fortunately, it wasn't broken.

The refresh mechanism only applies to the items he brought with him when he transmigrated. Items acquired later are not counted in the refresh mechanism. Otherwise, he might have wanted to accumulate a large number of eggs by constantly resurrecting on the spot...

Even if he's basically at full health and mana after each resurrection, he can't just commit suicide to reset his status every time he's hungry, can he? He's not a masochist.

Therefore, with his own safety basically guaranteed, food and water are naturally his top priorities right now. As for the future... why think so much about it?

"Let me look. I remember I downloaded a video about starting a fire by friction and saved it on my phone... Do I need to find suitable wood and kindling first?"

Shi Bai opened his phone, maximized the screen, and placed it horizontally in front of him, looking thoughtful.

After looking around, he got up and walked out of the "safe hut" that he had deliberately piled up with leaves to cover it. About ten minutes later, he came back in carrying a few pieces of rotten, dry wood, and also found a bluestone slab that was relatively flat on the surface.

For the past three days, he has mostly eaten wild fruits, and he was even poisoned to death several times. His craving for meat has long been unbearable, but with his small body, he is more likely to be hunted by other monsters than hunted.

Now that he has finally risked stealing an egg, he plans to start a fire and eat it as a fried egg. Anyway, he won't die, so he'll just treat it like Shennong tasting hundreds of herbs... It seems like the description is a bit off.

Raising an eyebrow, after re-ensuring the privacy of the safe house, Shi Bai sat down with his back against the tree trunk and then enthusiastically began to start making fire by rubbing sticks together.

Of all the refreshable items he had, the most valuable was probably the phone that had traveled with him. Even if the battery was completely depleted, it would be restored to 90% of its original state upon refresh... Unfortunately, there was no internet or Wi-Fi, which was something he hated most.

Not to mention video tutorials on starting a fire by rubbing sticks together, his phone even has a complete detailed tutorial on making an atomic bomb from scratch, as well as a copy he downloaded out of curiosity from a group... "Seven Days of Crossdressing from Beginner to Expert".

Therefore, these days, it's best not to actually investigate the real identities of the silly netizens in online groups, because the person constantly urging the group admin to send lewd pictures might actually be a police officer busy meeting performance targets at the end of the year...

After taking two hours, seven minutes, fifty-three and six-three seconds, Shi Bai finally succeeded in starting a fire—the above results are guaranteed to be detailed, true and reliable because he timed it using the built-in stopwatch function of his watch.

He hurriedly placed the prepared bluestone slab on the small stove made of stones, and with great anticipation, Shi Bai reached out his sinful hand to the egg that he had brought back after going through so much hardship.

But it was at this moment that he discovered a very serious problem that also made him extremely sad.

That was this egg, of unknown origin, which he couldn't crack open no matter how hard he tried...

With a melancholy expression, Shi Bai raised his head at a 45-degree angle and gazed at the night sky through the gaps in the trees. Suddenly, he felt a strong urge to be alone.

...Anyone who dares to ask him who Jingjing is, he'll beat them to death!!!

Chapter Three: Professional Ethics

Sparse sunlight filtered through the gaps in the trees, casting a shadow as dawn silently arrived.

Following his body's biological clock, the boy who had been sleeping on a leaf with his head on a stone also opened his eyes.

"Ah... Survival in the Ancient Times, Day Four..."

Shi Bai stood up from the ground, stretched lazily, picked up his coat that had fallen to the side at some point, put it on, and then used a stone to make another heavy horizontal mark on the tree trunk.

After doing all this, he used a twig to poke at the almost extinguished embers in the fire pit and pulled out a round egg.

—Before going to bed last night, he buried the stubborn egg in the afterglow of the fire pit, trying to roast it directly.

"I don't feel any change... Could it be that my eyesight is so bad that I picked up a rock that looks like an egg?"

Looking at the egg in his hand, Shi Bai was clearly conflicted.

He knew absolutely nothing about this dangerous world. You can't expect a European dog to have much academic knowledge. There's still a possibility that he might accidentally pick up a rock thinking it's an edible egg.

"Ha... never mind, let's continue with finding safe shelter and food today."

With a sigh, Shi Bai casually stuffed the stone egg into his pocket and slipped out of the safe dwelling, making sure to camouflage himself with leaves and twigs as a last resort.

He needed a safe respawn point; he didn't want to respawn there only to find himself inside some prehistoric monster's belly...

After carefully walking along the path through the dense forest for about ten minutes, Shi Bai arrived at the edge of a cliff in a valley. The view below was obscured by clouds and mist, but the jagged rocks directly below were vaguely visible.