The afterlife blew up Gensokyo

..............................

"Uh... I was just a little curious whether you moon rabbits have ears or not. Seriously, are they really that sensitive?"

Looking at Qinglan, who was almost collapsed on the ground with her blue hair, Shi Bai couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed and withdrew his hand.

To be honest, he'd always been curious whether the Moon Rabbit had human ears besides its rabbit ears...

—The two moon rabbits, finally freed from their restraints, huddled together, trembling, with no one answering their questions.

Shi Bai: "..."

It took quite a while before he finally managed to convince the two weak, helpless, and pitiful moon rabbits that he was actually a good person, after he produced the small note that Eirin Yagokoro had written to him.

"Remember, Moon Dove died by crashing into a tree on its own. Its death has nothing to do with me, understand?"

Squatting in front of the two moon rabbits, he spoke to them very seriously, trying to unify his story and eliminate the evidence of his crimes at the root.

"I understand..."

Glancing at the pile of bones left over from the meal, the two moon rabbits shuddered in unison, then nodded vigorously.

“Moon Pigeon died by its own crash. We saw it with our own eyes. It has nothing to do with you.”

"That's right, this has nothing to do with me in the first place."

Nodding in satisfaction, Shi Bai stood up from the ground.

"As for the rest, just report the facts to Yonglin. By the way, when are you planning to go back? Would you like to rest at my house first..."

"No...no, it's not necessary. We're going back soon!!"

Before Shi Bai could finish speaking, Ling Hu hurriedly interrupted him, waving her hands repeatedly in front of her.

"It's true, we're really going back soon!!"

Although they were supposed to stay on the ground for a few more days according to the original plan, after experiencing this, they had no intention of staying on the ground to play any longer.

Earth is too terrible; they want to go back to the moon.

"Uh... do I look that scary? Or did what happened last night leave them traumatized..."

Watching the two moon rabbits flee in panic, Shi Bai couldn't help but scratch his head in confusion.

Although it was wrong of him to knock the other woman unconscious and tie her up last night, what could he do when they were acting suspiciously near his house? Under those circumstances, wouldn't others have assumed they were thieves?

He had originally planned to cook for them himself to soothe their wounded hearts...

"...Never mind, the most important thing right now is to go and bring that NEET princess over..."

After thinking for a while without figuring it out, Shi Bai stopped thinking about it and went back into the house to get a sickle. Then he got up and went out the door, heading towards the depths of the bamboo forest.

The story of the Bamboo Cutter is actually quite simple. It tells of an old bamboo cutter who, while cutting bamboo, discovered a shiny bamboo segment. Inside the bamboo, he found a little girl, whom he named "Princess Kaguya the Slender Bamboo." After three months, Princess Kaguya grew into a beautiful young woman. Five noblemen proposed to her, and she agreed to marry the one who could find her beloved treasure. All the suitors were rejected. The emperor even tried to force her into marriage, but she refused. Finally, Princess Kaguya ascended to heaven before the bewildered crowd of ordinary men. Her grandparents, who had raised her with such care, could only watch her depart.

"So, strictly speaking, I should now be considered the guardian of that NEET princess... or perhaps a parent or something?"

While pondering these matters in his mind, Shi Bai did not stop walking.

Theoretically speaking, he would probably need to take care of Kaguya Houraisan for one to two years, or perhaps even longer. Once Eirin Yagokoro finishes dealing with everything in Luna Capital and leaves, he will be truly free.

About half an hour later, following the location given by Yagokoro Eirin, he quickly found a section of bamboo emitting a faint light deep in the bamboo forest.

However, before he could find a good spot to make his cut, the bamboo section suddenly split open on its own, and with a "whoosh," a miniature NEET princess, no bigger than his palm, jumped out and landed on the ground in the bamboo forest.

—This action led Bai to decide to give the opponent a score of 9.9.

"What? They said they'd come to pick me up, but all of them are still inside... uh?"

Before she could finish a muttered complaint, Kaguya Houraisan belatedly noticed the "giant" standing in front of her. After her gaze lingered on the scythe in its hand for a moment, the NEET princess blinked.

"Well... how about I go back into the bamboo grove and let you cut it all over again?"

"........."

After staring at each other for a moment, the two figures, one big and one small, Shi Bai decisively took out his phone and played the background music of "The Birth of the Monkey King." Amid the rousing music, Shi Bai nodded to NEET Ji on the ground.

"Alright, you can go back now. Now, please repeat that action again."

Kaguya Houraisan: “???”

......................................................

The beginning of the Tale of the Bamboo Cutter, which I was involved in, seems to be somewhat unusual.

Shi Bai had a deep and serious expression on his face.

According to the timeline, I should have roasted the pigeon yesterday afternoon, but because of the series of events involving Fujiwara no Mokou and Hieda no Rei, the time I went to pick up Houraisan Kaguya was postponed by a whole night and a whole morning.

After staying inside the bamboo for so long without anyone coming to find her, Kaguya Houraisan finally couldn't resist and broke out of the bamboo herself... The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter instantly turned into the Calabash Brothers.

—No, it should be Bamboo Baby.

Since Kaguya Houraisan came to live on Earth as punishment, she naturally couldn't bring all her treasured possessions down from the Moon Capital with her companions. Furthermore, her body had been reduced to such a petite form due to certain magical techniques, requiring time to recover.

Shi Bai had already made a rough estimate in his mind. Based on the current physical form of a certain NEET princess, she was probably so small that he could easily crush her with one hand.

Given that the runaway princess is now smaller than a Coke bottle, there's no way she could possibly play games with him...

Looking at the Kaguya Houraisan that he had placed on the table along with the bamboo, Shi Bai couldn't help but sigh slightly.

Without any intention of hiding anything, Shi Bai looked at Kaguya Houraisan, who was hiding in the bamboo and curiously peeking out half of her head to examine him. He was unusually straightforward in betraying Eirin Yagokoro, telling her in detail that he had been entrusted by Eirin Yagokoro to come here and take care of her as her direct guardian. His approach was unusually simple and crude.

Finally, while Kaguya Houraisan was still processing this information with a shocked expression, he added a casual remark.

"...That's the basic situation. As for the credibility, you'll have to judge for yourself. Because of Eirin's request, I will be taking care of you from now on."

"Well, just knowing that the Lunar Capital still has Eirin is enough to confirm most of it. I had even prepared a rather reasonable excuse to avoid exposing the Lunar Capital..."

After thinking for a moment, Kaguya Houraisan stood up, her eyes filled with curiosity as she looked at him.

"What is your relationship with Eirin? The affairs of the Lunar Capital should be top secret, and you are not a citizen of the Moon. How did you come to know Eirin?"

"Because I am her teacher, and she is my student."

Shi Bai pursed his lips.

"I've always been an honest and open person, and honesty is my basic principle. In short, I've answered all your questions, but whether you believe me or not is up to you."

"Hmm... I have a few last questions."

It seemed that his last sentence had an effect, because Kaguya Houraisan, who had seemed to want to ask something, clearly hesitated slightly.

"What is your name? And how should I address you in the coming years?"

"His name is Shi Bai, and you can call him whatever you want... but considering his daily interactions with outsiders..."

After thinking for a moment with his arms crossed, Shi Bai nodded thoughtfully.

"How about this, to avoid any misunderstandings, you can call me 'elder brother' in front of others, and call me whatever you like at other times."

"Brother..."

Her gaze lingered on his face for a moment, and after what seemed like some consideration, Kaguya Houraisan nodded decisively.

"No problem. Then I'll have to trouble you to take care of me until I finish my sentence and return to the Moon Capital."

"You've finished asking your questions, now it's my turn to ask."

Shi Bai tapped the table lightly with his fingers.

"When will you be able to return to normal? You can't go out looking like this."

"Once the remaining magical power in my body dissipates, I should be able to return to normal."

Looking down at herself and briefly estimating the time in her mind, Kaguya Houraisan nodded.

"As for the specific time required... it will probably be between three and four months."

"Three to four months..."

After thinking for a moment, Shi Bai stood up from the table.

"Well, before that, let me build you a house first... What kind of house would you like to live in? A three-story villa or a courtyard house?"

"Where we live isn't important for now..."

Perched on the edge of a bamboo stalk, a runaway princess from the Moon Capital wore a bitter expression, her words filled with resentment.

"I'm starving. Do you have any food here? The food on the ground certainly can't compare to the food in the Moon Capital, but it should be enough to fill my stomach, right?"

"Food..."

After a moment's thought, Shi Bai decisively laid out a [food tablecloth] that was many times larger than a certain NEET princess on the table.

"If you had come earlier, you might have been able to have roast pigeon, but for now, that's all we have."

Kaguya Houraisan: "..."

ps: Good afternoonヽ(ー_ー)ノ

Chapter Twenty-Two: The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter Officially Sets Sail

When it comes to taking care of people, Shi Bai can be said to have a lot of experience.

After all, from the very beginning, he had been taking care of Saya and Yu. Later, after being awakened by Yagokoro Eirin, he took care of Yagokoro Eirin as well. After all, at that time, Yagokoro Eirin only knew how to pick fruit to fill her stomach, and she didn't know how to take care of herself at all.

Originally, he was ambitious and wanted to train Yagokoro Eirin into a perfect maid who could take good care of people. However, he never expected that she would go to the moon with Tsukiyoshi no Yoru. All his efforts in training Yagokoro Eirin ended up benefiting a certain NEET princess... who is the very curious Lunar Princess in front of him.

Faced with the [Food Tablecloth] that could conjure up an endless variety of delicious food at will, Kaguya Houraisan was filled with curiosity. After receiving instructions on how to use it from him, she enthusiastically began her experiment.

Unfortunately, she overlooked her current body shape, so after the first experiment, she almost got buried alive by the food that suddenly appeared.

Hmm... it really was just a little short.

"........."

Looking at the mountain of sunflower seeds that almost filled the entire food table, and the "corpse" buried under the seeds with only a small hand sticking out, Shi Bai fell into silence.

...That really was a "corpse," and it was still warm.

So, there really is something wrong with my Tale of the Bamboo Cutter!? Yagokoro Eirin asked me to take care of her, but within five minutes of bringing Kaguya Houraisan home, she suddenly almost died.

The problem is, even if you die in a slightly more elegant way, it's fine, but being buried alive by a bunch of sunflower seeds or something...

A minute later, Kaguya Houraisan, who had finally managed to climb out of the mountain of melon seeds, sat on top of the pile of melon seeds with a lingering sense of fear.

"Hey, there's something wrong with your [Food Tablecloth]!!"

After taking a minute to recover, Kaguya Houraisan yelled at him with great dissatisfaction.

"If I hadn't taken the elixir of immortality, I would probably be dead by now!!"

"Is this my fault? Who told you to be so reckless as to go on the [Food Tablecloth] and summon such a huge table of sunflower seeds... Whose fault is it that you brought this on yourself?"

Shi Bai rubbed his forehead with a headache, suddenly regretting telling the other person how to use the [Food Tablecloth].

He originally thought that taking care of the other party would be a simple task, but now it seems that this is another hellish task... Strange, why did I say "again"?

After taking out a large bag and collecting all the sunflower seeds piled up like a small mountain on the table, Shi Bai got up and walked into the courtyard.

"Be careful when you use the [Food Tablecloth], I don't want to come here every day to collect your corpse... Even if you can be resurrected after death, the pain and stuff will still exist, right?"

"Wait, where are you going?"

Seeing that Shi Bai's figure had already walked out of the door, Houraisan Kaguya hurriedly called out to his back.

"Don't take all those melon seeds by yourself! At least leave some for me!"

"...I'll help you build a house."

A seemingly speechless reply came from outside the door.

Given Kaguya Houraisan's current size, the only option for her residence would be to create a temporary dwelling, much like a model. This would normally be a very time-consuming task, but with his [Heavenly Craftsmanship] talent, such things are essentially no problem.

In just five minutes, he walked in from outside the door carrying a small and exquisite bamboo house model, and then placed it directly on the floor.

The bamboo house, which he bought from Taketori-o, originally featured a Japanese tatami structure with a small table on the smooth, clean floor. So, in this bamboo house model, which was specially made for Houraisan Kaguya and was destined to have a lifespan of only about three months, he didn't bother to think too much and simply adopted the bamboo house design. It could be said to be a scaled-down model of this bamboo house.

Even the bed he made for himself because he wasn't used to sleeping on tatami mats was also scaled down and placed in the model. Every detail was perfectly scaled down and reproduced, with absolutely no flaws... This is what is called ingenious craftsmanship.

"I've already planned out your room. You can familiarize yourself with it first. There are suitable blankets inside... If you want to sleep in a bed, I can also get one for you."

"This... you started doing this a month in advance?"

Stepping into the bamboo house model, Kaguya Houraisan sat down next to the table in the main hall and stared wide-eyed at the teacups and teapots on the table, which were almost identical to those in the real world and scaled down to the same size.