The afterlife blew up Gensokyo

With the source of the incident resolved, the blizzard that had raged in Gensokyo for nearly a month finally began to subside.

Shi Bai reached out and scratched his hair slightly, then rolled over on the recliner.

......................................................

"You want to soak in a hot spring?"

Looking at the tengu crow in front of him, Shi Bai's expression was rather strange.

"Yes, that's right. So, can you help me?"

Aya Shameimaru nodded quickly.

"While I'm not surprised that you often have strange ideas popping into your head, why do you suddenly want to soak in a hot spring now?"

Shi Bai sat up from the recliner and asked Aya Shameimaru in front of him with some wariness.

He couldn't help but be wary, because he had no idea what was going on in the head of the guy in front of him.

During the month that the other party had been staying at her place, she had caused her no shortage of trouble. For example, she tricked her into going in while Inuzoki was taking a shower, and she secretly instructed the drunk Inuzoki to climb into her bed... and so on.

...Fortunately, I am a righteous person.

To be honest, the crimes the other party committed in the past month, which resembled instigation, are simply too numerous to count...

According to her, this is called news gathering, which made Shi Bai nostalgic for the well-behaved, cute, and obedient Wenwen from his childhood.

"If you can help me soak in the hot spring, I'll give you all of this."

Pulling a stack of photos out of his pocket and waving them in front of Shi Bai, the upright and honest journalist looked serious.

"These photos are from my treasured collection. Two-thirds of them are private photos of Haneda, and one-third are of Momiji. You definitely won't regret getting them!!"

"...Aren't you afraid they'll beat you to death?"

Shi Bai's lips twitched involuntarily when he caught a glimpse of the contents of a few photos out of the corner of his eye.

"By the way, when exactly did you take these photos without my knowledge?"

"Of course, it'll be when we shower and go to bed together!!"

Aya Shameimaru looked completely self-righteous.

"These photos are going to be passed down as family heirlooms; they are truly priceless... Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!!"

"What are you thinking about at such a young age?"

He delivered a swift chop to the other person's hand, frowned, took the stack of photos from the other person's hand, and then burned them to ashes in his hand without even looking at them.

"I think you might have some problems in some areas, and it seems necessary to give you some ideological education. From today onwards, you'd better behave yourself..."

"It's a test!!"

Seeing that the other party was about to attack him again, Aya Shameimaru was so frightened that she quickly shrank back.

"This was just a test to see if you're really lustful, I was just kidding... Oh, stop!! My clothes!! You're going to rip them off!!!"

As Aya Shameimaru hurriedly explained, a commotion suddenly came from the doorway, and a large group of people tumbled in from outside.

Feather, Flower, Phantom Moon, Dream Moon, Little Umbrella... plus Lady, who is tiny and sitting on Phantom Moon's shoulder.

"Speaking of which, you guys seem to have a lot of free time?"

Shi Bai narrowed his eyes slightly as he watched the large group of people who had just crashed in from outside.

"Haha... The weather's nice today..."

Seeing that Aya Shameimaru's clothes were intact and he was tiptoeing out of the room, Gengetsu chuckled a few times. He was the first to pounce on a certain tengu, followed closely by Hatake, whose face was flushed.

"You bastard!! When exactly did you take these photos of me?! Hand over all the rest of the photos!!!"

"Whoa, I really didn't sneakily take pictures... Help!! Yu Li is going to kill the tengu!!!"

"You almost stepped on me..."

"Mengyue, quick, hold her feet down..."

...chaos ensued.

"Remember to help clean the room later."

With a slight twitch at the corner of his mouth, Shi Bai said this to Ellie, who rushed over upon hearing the commotion, before turning and walking out the door.

Some things, you just have to get used to them.

For example, what just happened in front of him is basically what has been happening in the shop every day for the past month... a daily occurrence.

P.S.: My phone broke...

Chapter Twenty-Nine: Patchouli's Magical Ritual

Early spring, when the snowflakes begin to melt.

"So, are you ready?"

Closing the book in his hand and setting it aside, Shi Bai spoke to Lady in front of him.

"Since you're mentally prepared, let's go in."

"...Are you sure you don't want to eat me?"

Looking at the large pot in front of her, Lady's lips twitched slightly.

There's no other reason than that the current situation is simply too suspicious.

A large pot was heated to a rolling boil over charcoal. It was not only half full of water, but also filled with all sorts of seasonings. It looked like all that was missing was her to automatically jump in...

"What are you thinking? Even if I wanted to eat something, I wouldn't like it boiled; I prefer it fried. Who wants to eat you?"

Rolling his eyes, Shi Bai casually poured a plate of chopped potatoes into the pot.

"If it weren't for you, I, a genius, wouldn't have bothered studying those magic books. Patchouli's magic books are simply inhuman... Are you going to jump or not?"

"...Are you sure you really won't turn me into food and serve me on the dinner table?"

Looking at the boiling pot below, Lady spoke softly after a moment of silence.

"If you don't want to, then so be it. You can stay in this small body shape for the rest of your life. I won't force you anyway."

With a pursed lip, Shi Bai put the plate in his hand aside and turned to leave without hesitation.

"Anyway, I can build a cage and keep you as a pet, which isn't out of the question..."

"...If I get cooked, remember to fish me out. I think I can still be saved."

With a sense of tragic grandeur, Lady closed her eyes and leaped directly into the pot.

"Don't worry, with me here, you'll have a hard time even if you want to die. At worst, I'll go to the underworld and get you back. I know the underworld very well. There's a certain goddess of hell who still owes me a lot of money."

Returning to the pot, Shi Bai made a solemn promise to Lady in the pot.

"I have high hopes for Patchouli's magical abilities. The magical ritual she developed is truly a genius-level creation in some aspects... Wait a minute, why are you still wearing clothes?"

"...Do I have to take my clothes off too?"

Lady, huddled among a bunch of ingredients, looked utterly dejected.

“Ingredients should have their own self-awareness… cough cough, don’t say I’m taking advantage of you, this is written in this magic book itself, if you want to find it, go ask Patchouli yourself.”

Shi Bai picked up the magic book beside him and placed it directly in front of Lady.

"In some ways, this magical ritual is quite dangerous. If even the slightest mistake goes wrong, I'll probably have to go to the underworld to rescue them."

Lady: "..."

Winter is coming to an end, and spring will soon be here.

Given Lady's current condition, if she isn't helped to recover before winter ends, she will likely disappear from this world along with the vanishing snowflakes.

Although he could simply go to the underworld to demand the person back even if that happened, Shi Bai decided to use other methods to help the other person recover, considering how long Heka would bother him if that situation actually occurred.

In the end, after searching high and low, he still found the solution in the dozen or so magic books that Patchouli had written and given to him.

It's not that there aren't any other ways, but the methods found in the magic book are easier and simpler to implement. Why go through the trouble of choosing a more difficult method when you can do something easily?

—Anyway, he doesn't want to travel far.

Shi Bai glanced straight at the girl with long, silver-white hair who was soaking in the pot, and then decisively put the lid on the pot.

Picking up some magical ritual materials he had obtained from the Riluo Academy from the table beside him, Shi Bai began drawing various intricate magic circle patterns on the ground while adding firewood to the pot.

Although this was his first time encountering such a thing, copying all the magical patterns wasn't a problem for him. After all, the magic book written by Patchouli herself had no learning curve. Even if an ordinary person got their hands on it, as long as they found enough magical materials, they could still perform relatively simple magical rituals.

"Okay, one last stroke."

After taking the magic book and comparing it with his own, Shi Bai nodded in satisfaction and then made the final stroke.

............................................................

"Ahhh...I don't want to leave here..."

In the front hall, Aya Shameimaru was rolling around on the floor covered with quilts in a rather unseemly manner, her words filled with resentment.

"Why did winter end so quickly? My news reporting wasn't even finished... Why are they forcing us to leave?"

The harsh winter was about to pass, and spring was just around the corner. Their excuse for staying here had disappeared, and they no longer had any reason to continue living here.

"If it weren't for Wenwen, you always causing trouble under the guise of gathering information, would we have been kicked out?"

While sitting in front of the kotatsu and writing something, Ji Haitang Yuli let out a soft snort of dissatisfaction.

"Stop fooling around, come and help us right now. The new issue of the newspaper is about to be released, and we have to get first place in this competition."

"No way (▼皿▼＃), being kicked out like this isn't my style!!"

He completely ignored her, and as if suddenly remembering something, Aya Shameimaru abruptly sat up from the ground.

"If I can get even a juicy scoop on Shi Bai, then I'll have an excuse to stay here any longer!!"

"Really? But you've failed 127 times already."

While yawning and helping with some layout work, Huan Yue mercilessly delivered another blow.

"Give up. That guy is a complete ascetic. If you go and provoke him again, he might tie you up again and then go crazy and lecture you on advanced mathematics in front of you without letting you sleep..."

"boom!!!"

Before Huan Yue could finish her sentence, a deafening explosion suddenly came from the backyard.

His eyes lit up instantly. Aya Shameimaru was the first to get up from the ground, grab the camera hanging around her neck, and vanished from the spot in an instant.

"........."

With Aya Shameimaru gone, the remaining five members of the news team at the table exchanged glances, then, ignoring the newspaper layout they were working on, they all stood up in unison and quickly ran towards the backyard...

P.S.: My phone is finally fixed... Good morning.

Chapter Thirty: What... something about burning oneself

"Now I finally understand why the Scarlet Devil Mansion keeps exploding... With Patchouli around, how could the Scarlet Devil Mansion not explode?"

Amidst the billowing smoke, Shi Bai used his hands to support himself as he got up. Turning his head to look at the iron pot that had been blown to pieces, Shi Bai muttered to himself, somewhat speechless.

To be honest, he didn't expect that, even though everything had gone smoothly before, a violent explosion would occur without warning just as he was finishing the last stroke.

...It was so fast that he didn't even have time to react.

"So this magical ritual failed? Looks like I'll have to make a trip to the underworld later..."

"How much longer are you going to stay on me? And could you please remove your hands from my body?"

Before he could finish his sentence, a soft voice came from beneath him.

"Uh……"

His gaze shifted downwards, meeting a pair of pale eyes that feigned calmness, while his right hand seemed to be resting precisely on the other's…

Shi Bai subconsciously reached out and pinched it.

...He swore that it was really just a subconscious act.

When a man touches a beautiful woman, he mostly relies on instinct rather than thought.

"It feels comfortable, doesn't it?"