The afterlife blew up Gensokyo

Chapter Eight: The Deeply Sinful Man

"...Didn't you say yesterday that you weren't coming?"

Looking at the girl standing in front of him with a box, smiling at him, Shi Bai put down his calligraphy brush and inexplicably felt a toothache.

"Did I mention that yesterday? I might not remember. By the way, where's the flower fan?"

Heng'e placed the food box on the table and asked in a nonchalant tone.

"...went out to fight monsters and level up."

He was utterly speechless at the girl's routine question. After replying with that one sentence, Shi Bai lowered his head and continued writing on the paper.

"Is there anything else you can do?"

"I made some new snacks, but I'm not sure if they'll taste good, so I'd like to invite Huashan to try them and give me some feedback... What are you writing?"

Heng'e leaned closer, looking very curious.

"Hasn't the scale of the ferocious beasts' movements increased recently? So for a time, people were in a state of panic. Ordinary people don't know about the impending calamity, just like that white wolf tengu..."

While casually answering aloud, Shi Bai wrote words on the paper with his brush.

"So, on my suggestion, Hou Yi asked me to see if I could help him write some inspirational slogan or something... Please, you're too close and disturbing my writing."

"Tch...as if anyone cares to see you write..."

After muttering a dissatisfied remark to herself, the girl took a few steps back, but as she watched the contents gradually appear on the paper, a strange light flashed in her eyes.

As heaven maintains vigor through movement, a gentleman should constantly strive for self-improvement.

The earth's nature is receptive; a virtuous person, in accordance with this, carries the world with great virtue.

[Following the wind, the superior man, in accordance with this, reiterates his commands and carries out his duties.]

[As thunder gradually rumbles, a wise person, filled with fear, reflects upon themselves.]

Goodness is like water; a wise person plans ahead before undertaking any task.

[Fire is associated with people; a wise person distinguishes things by their categories and groups.]

[By walking on muddy paths, a wise man can discern the people's aspirations for peace and stability.]

[The mountain of Gen (艮) signifies humility; a virtuous person uses this to reduce excess and increase deficiency.]

"Is this what you wanted?"

"No, I copied it from elsewhere because it felt very powerful to write."

Rolling his eyes, Shi Bai casually wrote down this line on another piece of paper, then turned to Heng'e with a serious expression and began to speak.

"Here, this is what I wanted."

Keep going! Persistence pays off! Go for it!!

"........."

Looking at the newly written line, Heng'e was speechless for a moment.

Yawning, Shi Bai walked back to his personal recliner and lay down.

"You've come at the right time. Could you please deliver these two calligraphy pieces to them later? It will save me the trouble of making the trip."

"I didn't come here just to run errands, and besides, the difference between the two sets is just too great!"

Heng'e bared her teeth at him.

"Can't you be even a little bit serious with me? Like that day when you saved me..."

"Ugh...it's so tiring to get serious. I don't want to be serious. Isn't it better to just be a lazy bum?"

Shi Bai slammed the book in his hand down over his face and interrupted the other person in a muffled voice.

"Hua Shan isn't here right now, so is there anything else you need?"

"The weather's so nice today, why don't you take me hunting?"

With her eyes darting around, Heng'e sat down at the table.

"I haven't been to the Youqiong clan's area much, and I'm afraid that if I go out alone, I might encounter danger like last time, so I want to..."

"Hmm... Since the weather is so nice, I'm going to take a nap. If there's nothing else, you can go ahead now. Good afternoon."

"........."

(...Does this guy...really hate talking to me?)

Looking at the man in front of her who had fallen asleep in a second, the girl couldn't help but pout in dissatisfaction.

She carefully put away the two calligraphy scrolls. Just as Heng'e was about to leave quietly, her gaze inadvertently fell on the figure under the tree again. After hesitating for a moment, she walked back to the stone table and sat down.

With one hand supporting her head and her body turned to look at the figure, Heng'e sighed with a hint of sadness, as if she had thought of something.

Nobody's a fool. Through these past few months, she could clearly see the other person's obvious resistance. But when it comes to feelings, once one person has captured your heart, there's no way another person can ever enter.

As a genius among the Tushan clan, appearing only once in ten thousand years, Heng'e ultimately seemed a bit too naive. Compared to the purely rational Hou Yi, although emotion clearly dominated her personality... rationality still remained.

"Tch...who would want to come see you every day...if it weren't for the fact that I'd never have this opportunity again after I get married..."

Lying on the table, the girl drifted off to sleep in the bright sunlight.

In the quiet courtyard in the afternoon, under the golden sunlight, she had a very long dream in a daze.

...........................................................................

When Bai woke up from his sleep, it was already dusk. The book that had been covering his face had slipped to the ground as he turned the pages. The golden sunlight, like gold, lazily filtered through the messy treetops and fell on him.

"Tsk...she actually fell asleep..."

Shi Bai narrowed his eyes slightly and sat up from the recliner.

As if sensing something, he turned his head and immediately saw a girl sleeping soundly on the stone table, facing him.

The pale golden sunlight of the setting sun shone on the other person's face, making their features exceptionally clear in the sunlight.

As if possessed, he reached out his hand to the other person.

...Then he took the food box from the table.

"Ah... I've slept for so long, I'm so hungry..."

Upon opening the food box and picking up the pastries inside, a hint of relief appeared on someone's face.

"Sleeping until I naturally wake up, and then there's something to eat when I wake up, this kind of wonderful life is just amazing..."

Feeling the burning pain in his mouth, Shi Bai suddenly fell silent.

"How is it? Does it taste good?"

With her chin resting on her hands, Heng'e, who had also woken up at some point, smiled and asked Shi Bai a question.

"This is my special fire pepper pastry; I'm sure it will leave a deep impression on you, right?"

"Ah... it's alright. Compared to the hellish cuisine of a certain Yama King, yours is far from good. Remember to work harder in the future."

With a calm expression, Shi Bai stuffed the remaining pastries into his mouth and gave the other person an encouraging look.

"Next time you might try making it even spicier; that might make it taste better."

"Wait, wait a minute, you just ate it all like that!? I added fire peppers, you really..."

Hearing someone's comments and watching that person eat all the pastries without changing expression, Heng'e's voice became stuttering.

"What's so special about a mere fire pepper?"

Shi Bai stood up, a cold smile on his face.

"The muddy sludge covered the shame of those who lay on the ground..."

As he was talking, Shi Bai realized something was wrong and touched his swollen lips, which looked like sausages. Suddenly, he fell silent again.

"Hahaha, so you really didn't know what a fire pepper was? You actually ate them all in one go..."

Seeing Shi Bai's embarrassed expression, Heng'e couldn't help but clutch her stomach and burst into laughter.

"Eating just a little bit wouldn't have been a problem, but you... wait, what are you doing!?"

"Young bats enjoy all, young orchids block all."

With lightning speed, he took out another piece of pastry from the food box and quickly threw it into the other person's mouth. After saying this with a deep expression, he ignored the voice coming from behind and quickly turned around and walked back into the house.

Women and petty men are indeed difficult to deal with; the ancients were right!

............................................................

"Recently, the appearances of ferocious beasts have become more and more frequent, and according to intelligence exchanges with other clans, some people from other clans have witnessed the appearance of Qiongqi, one of the four ancient ferocious beasts... What's wrong with your mouth?"

Ibaraki Kasen, who had been talking about what she had seen and heard these past few days, finally couldn't help but ask a question.

"Yi Dian... It's a trivial matter, not worth mentioning."

Shi Bai's lips twitched involuntarily. He raised his head and silently looked up at the sky, where the night air was slightly cool.

"Stop talking about other things. Tell me a little about yourself. How have you been feeling lately?"

"...The outlook is not optimistic."

After hesitating for a moment, Ibaraki Kasen shook her head.

"Most of my negative and violent emotions are built up from thousands of years of killing, so if I wanted to completely eliminate them, I should have stopped the killing. But in the current environment..."

She didn't continue speaking.

"So your original plan was to stop killing with killing? You think this is the same as fighting poison with poison?"

Shi Bai rolled his eyes.

"Since it's not working, let's stop. We've stayed here long enough; it's time to move on to the next part of our journey. For the rest of the trip, you just need to focus on being the cook and doing odd jobs; leave everything else to me."

"...Why do you do this? Don't you hate those things?"

Biting her lip, Ibaraki Kasen suddenly asked this question.

"First of all, I promised oxycodone that I would help you solve your problem."

Holding up a finger, the person looked very serious.

"Oxycodone..."

Ibaraki Kasen's eyes twitched slightly.

"Secondly, I didn't give you that lucky star pendant as a gift, but rather as a loan. The sooner you resolve your problems, the sooner that thing will be back in my hands."

Shi Bai then solemnly extended his second finger.

"A pendant..."

"Finally, I've always wanted a perfect and elegant maid."

"...A maid?"

Ibaraki Kasen suddenly felt a sense of foreboding.

"Yeah, I've wanted a perfect maid for so long!! If it weren't for the fact that I've been trying to get a Saber for hundreds of years without success..."

Someone looked indignant.

"I once wanted to train Yagokoro to be a perfect and elegant maid, but I failed. Succubuses are simply not suitable, Shinki is a master of house-destroying, Tanjo is too taciturn, and Yuuka is too domineering. Originally, a certain silly and cute white wolf tengu would have been perfect, but she can't possibly come running around with me. What can I do? I'm desperate too!!"

"So, the last point you mentioned is..."

Ibaraki Kasen's smile appeared slightly stiff.

"That's right, you're the most suitable candidate!!"

Shi Bai suddenly stood up, his face filled with fervor.

"She does my laundry, cooks, and prepares meals for me. Every morning, she wears a maid outfit and greets me with a perfect smile at the bedside. She takes care of all the chores for me without me having to lift a finger. If I want something, I just have to say a few words, and she'll bring it to me in the shortest time. Every night, she obediently warms my bed, and occasionally she even offers me a lap pillow as a perk..."

A table came crashing straight down on his face.

......................................................

"Was this place... invaded by ferocious beasts before?"

When Hou Yi arrived at the courtyard, he was met with a scene of utter chaos.

"Ah... it's pretty much the same as a ferocious beast invasion anyway."