My family runs an adventurer's guild.

Just like Mark Twain described in "The Million Pound Note," a penniless vagrant, after accidentally obtaining a million-pound note that could not be cashed, instantly became a respectable person simply by using the note as collateral, even though he could not use the note itself.

Then, he used the silver coin he had just received as a service fee to buy a large piece of the cheapest whole wheat bread at the "Forest Fairy Pastry Shop," and sandwiched it with dried fish that the little fairy Flor had kindly given him, which served as his dinner.

After finishing her meal hastily, even though dusk had not yet truly fallen and the streets outside were bustling, Firi, a lazy employee devoid of the "corporate warrior" spirit of Showa-era Japanese office workers, locked the shop door early, hung up the "closed" sign, and prepared to go to sleep.

Hmm? Closing up so early, isn't that a bit lazy?

Hey! Cats need about twice as much sleep as humans; they need sixteen hours a day to stay healthy!

This cat has been left in such a desolate, boring, and poorly paid institution, with a daily income barely enough to fill its stomach. The fact that it manages to stay open for six hours a day (even though it spends half of that time dozing off) is already incredibly commendable! (Raises paw)

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Why is the Adventurers' Guild in Totoro Town, where Phil works, so deserted and quiet right now?

Before answering this question, we must first make a clear definition: what exactly is an adventurer?

First of all, adventurers should be a legitimate profession, not criminals like thieves or petty thieves who are subject to arrest.

While it is true that many audacious adventurers have become bandits, thieves, assassins, or killers for various reasons, from the perspective of the Adventurers' Guild, the missions issued by the guild must be legal and permitted or tacitly approved by the local rulers; otherwise, the guild simply cannot operate.

If missions like assassinating politicians, kidnapping tycoons, and stealing from bank vaults can be openly posted on the guild's mission board for anyone to see, then this place is no longer a legitimate adventurers' guild, but an illegal thieves' or assassins' guild.

Of course, if adventurers are dishonest and occasionally do private work, there's not much a guild with limited management skills can do about it.

Furthermore, due to differences in legal systems across regions, crimes committed in some places may be considered legal business practices in others. For instance, in countries that recognize slavery, slave-hunting teams could legally recruit adventurers in cities and then capture slaves outside of towns…

Secondly, although adventurers perform a wide variety of tasks, including but not limited to clearing out monsters, hunting wild beasts, escorting caravans, acting as bodyguards, exploring ruins, scouting out war-torn wilderness areas, collecting herbs and other wild plants and animals, and even delivering messages, searching for people, and acting as mercenaries in wars, their core job is basically the same: to be responsible for defeating monsters that inhabit areas outside of towns.

For most novice adventurers, fresh out of school and full of youthful vigor, delivering messages, gathering herbs, and acting as guards are all too boring. The true professional life of an adventurer lies in wielding a greatsword and wand to raid goblin and ogre lairs, venturing deep into dangerous forests to hunt powerful monsters, and then collecting hefty bounties and enjoying the cheers and hospitality of the villagers!

Third, adventurers are not volunteers or free laborers; if you want adventurers to hunt monsters, someone must pay them.

In summary, adventurers are bounty hunters who charge fees for hunting monsters, and also jacks-of-all-trades who do all sorts of odd jobs. They are somewhat similar to a combination of explorers and mercenaries on Earth, walking a fine line between legal and illegal activities, making it a high-risk, high-reward profession.

So, why is there a profession called "Adventurer" in a fantasy world of swords and magic?

Generally speaking, the regions where adventurers are active are mostly sparsely populated, teeming with monsters, and plagued by frequent attacks. They are teeming with roaming goblins and ogres, and occasionally, evil necromancers commanding skeletons and zombies, constantly threatening the safety of farms outside the cities. The nobles and royalty ruling these regions have limited power and cannot suppress these unstable elements solely with their armies—their armies are designed to garrison cities, intimidate the poor, and fight enemy nations; they are ill-suited for long-term, small-scale, high-intensity special operations against monsters. If they were to constantly disperse their armies into small squads, roaming around hunting monsters, their own armies would likely collapse before other noble armies even arrive.

Therefore, the armies of these lords and nobles could usually only hold the small area within the city walls, barely managing to stabilize their core base. As for the villages and pastures outside the city walls, they had no choice but to hire adventurers to eliminate monsters and maintain order.

At the same time, the wealthy and powerful living in castles and cities, as well as magicians and priests who were engrossed in various studies, often needed some brave explorers to go to the remote wilderness to help them collect some rare and exotic products. This is another reason for the existence of adventurers.

Having defined adventurers, let's now talk about what an adventurer's guild is.

Generally speaking, adventurers' guilds are not tightly organized, disciplined social groups, but rather simply trading platforms between adventurers and employers. Employers post bounties on the guild, and adventurers come to the guild to accept the quests and collect the rewards.

Although newcomers need to register with a guild to become legitimate adventurers, the guild does not pay adventurers a salary, so it cannot restrict their personal freedom, nor can it stop adventurers from chasing bounty missions from one city to another. Similarly, it has no right to demand that adventurers perform unpaid labor for the guild like a lord commands his subjects—unless the guild can offer generous rewards that will tempt adventurers.

In a standard adventure quest, the guild's primary role is to act as an intermediary between the adventurer and the employer, helping the employer assess the adventurer's progress to prevent fraudulent activities by unscrupulous adventurers, and ensuring the employer pays the full reward to prevent unethical employers from defaulting on payments. This is somewhat similar to a real estate agency or online marketplace like Taobao on modern Earth—adventures in the fantasy world organize their own teams, acquire equipment, and choose quests, with guilds having no right to interfere. Similarly, internet users on the modern internet run their own online stores and choose their business projects; Taobao simply provides them with a legitimate platform to conduct their activities.

Therefore, an adventurers' guild must meet the following conditions in order to operate successfully.

First, it is necessary to obtain official policy permission from the location where the guild is located, and at the very least, to be able to operate and conduct business openly.

Secondly, there should be locations near the Adventurers' Guild where adventurers can do quests, such as forests inhabited by monsters or ancient ruins.

Third, if there are no adventurous places nearby, then at least there must be a wealthy employer willing to pay to post quests in the guild.

Fourth, after the quest is posted by the employer, the guild must be able to find enough adventurers in the local area to carry out the quest.

Unfortunately, the Totoro Town Adventurers' Guild does not meet any of the four conditions mentioned above, except for the first one.

Although it once enjoyed a golden age of prosperity, the Adventurers' Guild in Totoro Town is now struggling to find adventurers to perform quests, with few employers posting them. Furthermore, after three centuries of reclamation and development, the area surrounding Totoro Town has largely lost its monster lairs and ancient ruins for adventurers to hunt or explore.

After all, the real other world is not an online game. The monsters that were destroyed, the herbs that were harvested, the evil organizations that were defeated, and the ancient ruins that were looted are not virtual data signals and will not refresh regularly like in an online game.

No matter how rampant a monster's reproductive ability may be, it cannot withstand the slow, persistent effort of time. Just like the many Native American tribes that once roamed across North America, they were eventually driven into a few reservations under the incentive policy of the US government offering bounties for the purchase of Native American scalps.

In this world, as the civilized population grows denser and villages and farmlands expand, wilderness and monsters are gradually disappearing.

When adventurers find themselves in a place with no more dangers to be encountered, the adventurers' guild in that place will naturally be on the verge of collapse.

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Of course, in this fantasy world of swords and magic, there are many, many other places like Totoro Town where farmland replaced forests, civilization triumphed over barbarism, and the surrounding countryside gradually lost its monsters to hunt, leading to the slow decline of local adventurer guilds. However, during this long and irreversible process of decline, these local adventurer guilds did not sit idly by. Instead, they each used their unique abilities to gradually transform into taverns, casinos, brothels, inns, and general stores, continuing to thrive in civilized society in another form.

In fact, by convention, the adventurers' guilds in most towns should also be among the most famous taverns or inns in the area.

Because in that wild environment where monsters roam, bandits run rampant, and danger is everywhere, you adventurers who wield swords and wands and control the lives and deaths of countless people are a privileged class in this chaotic environment, belonging to a group of people with very high incomes.

Similarly, since adventurers live a life of constant danger, always on the verge of death, they often don't save their money. Instead, they squander it and enjoy life while they're still alive. Therefore, adventurers are a group with very high spending power.

When these wealthy and willing adventurers gather at the Adventurers' Guild every day to wait for quests, they're bound to want to enjoy fine food and wine, or gamble. Therefore, to meet the adventurers' needs, various guilds began selling food and drinks and providing gambling equipment.

Then, alcoholism and prostitution, these two decadent pastimes, have always been inseparable.

Therefore, in addition to indulging in feasting and drinking, using various flirting techniques to seduce the female receptionists of the Adventurers' Guild is also one of the adventurers' daily pleasures. Many of the receptionists in the Adventurers' Guild are retired female adventurers, belonging to the most unrestrained of the unrestrained, who usually don't mind selling their bodies a few times for money. Although they ended their adventures to become guild receptionists because they were tired of the life of adventure and wanted a stable life, this doesn't mean they can regain the virginity and shyness they lost during their adventures… Even receptionists from ordinary families, under the influence of these unrestrained female predecessors, often take up the business of selling their bodies and providing sexual services.

As a result, some adventurer guilds that had become famous for their beautiful and unrestrained female patrons naturally turned into brothels with a distinctly adventurer character after the local adventure business gradually declined.

As for the Adventurers' Guild also running an inn, that's even easier to understand. In that perilous environment, what inn is safer or more reliable than the Adventurers' Guild? And those adventurers waiting to grab quests are also happy to stay at the guild to avoid missing out on any good opportunities.

Then, most adventurer guilds, in addition to receiving funding from the government and taking a cut from mission commissions, usually buy various spoils of war from adventurers during their expeditions, such as swords and armor captured in battle, the pelts, claws, and crystal cores of monsters killed, as well as rare flowers and minerals collected during their adventures. They then resell these to clients such as alchemy workshops, apothecaries, and magic academies, earning a profit from the price difference.

At the same time, where there is buying, there must be selling. While the guild purchases various raw materials, seized stolen goods and spoils from adventurers, it usually also sells adventurers essentials for expeditions such as ropes, potions, weapons, armor, and dry rations, which is equivalent to running a general store.

In short, if an adventurer's guild can be managed very successfully, it will often have developed into a large-scale comprehensive merchant guild covering multiple fields by the time the monsters in the vicinity are wiped out. It will provide everything from food and drink to entertainment, clothing, accommodation and transportation, and can be regarded as one of the top forces in the region.

Author's message

P.S.: Trump just launched missiles at Syria, and they've already nominated him for this year's Nobel Peace Prize. At least Obama got the prize before starting the war; now they're not even bothering with that. And then, this year's Nobel Prize in Literature was cancelled due to a major sexual assault scandal involving the judges, showing just how morally bankrupt the previous literature prizes were judged.

It feels like the credibility of the Nobel Prize and the Olympics is collapsing more and more these days.

In addition, the Russian floating nuclear power plant I wrote about in the Japan episode of "Invincible Urban Management" has finally been completed and put into operation. According to a report by China News Service on April 29th, local time on the 28th, Russia's first floating nuclear power plant, the "Akademik Lomonosov," was completed and began its maiden voyage from St. Petersburg to Murmansk to load fuel. After arriving in Murmansk, the floating nuclear power plant will be towed to Pevek, Russia's northernmost city, and will begin supplying electricity to a drilling platform and a desalination plant in the city in 2019.

I wonder if this floating nuclear power plant will be sold to Japan and towed to Fukushima in the future (O(∩_∩)O).

Perhaps then there really will be an AKB idol cabinet!

Chapter 9, The Extravagant Otaku Miss

However, the Adventurers' Guild in Totoro Town, instead of smoothly transforming itself into a thriving tavern, brothel, inn, or general store as the monsters around the town gradually disappeared, has become the half-dead, struggling entity it is today.

The reasons are twofold. First, the successive guild leaders of the Totoro Town Adventurers' Guild haven't been very good at managing things. And the current proprietress, Lulutia, Firi's mistress and the silver dragon, is a typical lazybones and spendthrift. Secondly… the guild simply doesn't have any extra land!

As a quick-witted modern-day transmigrator from Earth, Phili was naturally capable of considering changing the Adventurers' Guild's business direction during peacetime. However, the current Adventurers' Guild in Totoro Town, aside from a reception hall serving as its facade, had virtually no extra space or land. This meant that even if Phili wanted to "make a living" by renting out guild buildings, it was simply impossible.

Huh? Why doesn't the Adventurers' Guild, which occupies a large portion of prime real estate in the town, have any extra land available for them to use?

The reason is simple: just push open a small door behind the counter in the guild's front hall, walk to the back of the reception area, and you can see everything clearly.

Behind the seemingly ordinary, narrow front hall of the Adventurers' Guild in Totoro Town lies a huge, spacious room that resembles an auditorium, occupying nearly 90% of the guild's space. Once you push the door open, all you see is a pink hue with a girlish style: countless ribbons, countless laces, countless bows, countless plush toys... Doesn't this style seem a bit off?

Such an exaggerated visual impact, if caught off guard, could really blind Phil's gold-digging dog eyes... no, cat eyes.

In short, this extravagantly large "bedroom" is filled with a romantic and adorable girlish atmosphere, from the wallpaper and carpets to the curtains and chandeliers, adorned with ribbons, lace, and bows. Even the ceiling is decorated with a cute "dormouse in spring" painting. Beneath the ceiling, a female silver dragon over twenty meters long lies on her back in a comical pose on a giant pink bed the size of a ship's deck, fast asleep, blowing bubbles. Next to her is a giant plush rabbit pillow, larger than a bear.

She is Phili's master, the Silver Dragon Lady Lulutia, who is also the culprit who brought the Adventurers' Guild to the brink of bankruptcy.

—After inheriting the estate of the former guild master of the Totoro Town Adventurers' Guild, Lulutia didn't hesitate to break ground and occupy most of the guild's space to build this super luxurious and gigantic palace where she could roll around in her dragon form. In the process, she also exhausted all of the guild's reserves and sold off all the treasures that the guild had collected for many years... She is truly a spendthrift!

Because this enormous palace occupied most of the Adventurers' Guild's land, and the construction and decoration exhausted all the funds, Phili was unable to make a meal without rice. All his plans to transform the guild into a tavern, inn, and warehouse had to be abandoned.

The enormous sum of money that Miss Lulutia squandered on her ultra-luxurious palace could have been used to buy an apartment in town and live off the rent, or to buy a manor in the countryside for farming and herding. The resulting daily income would have been enough for her and Phil to live very lavishly.

But there was nothing that could be done about it. After all, the mistress, Lulutia, was a devout follower of the Church of Sleep, and she valued sleep more than anything else.

Besides, dragons, those lazy, enormous creatures, seem to have been accustomed to sleeping all day amidst piles of gold and gems since ancient times, right?!

Anyway, over the past five years, Lulutia has spent at least four and a half years holed up here sleeping, communicating with fellow members of the Church of Sleep in her dreams, and conducting some bizarre and impressive magical research...

In short, he simply circled around Miss Lulutia, who was fast asleep in her dragon form, and after confirming that his mistress was still in a deep sleep and showed no signs of waking up, he went straight to the foot of the bed, to his own pink kitten bed piled with lace bows.

Well, if you ignore the horribly cute pink background and the overly ornate girly decorations, this cat bed is actually quite comfortable to sleep in.

And so, master and servant, dragon and cat, drifted off into a sweet dream in this huge pink bedroom.

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Nothing happened that night, and then the sun rose and it was daylight.

As a lazy cat, Phil has never had the habit of getting up early for a morning run.

So, as usual, Phili slept until late morning the next day, while Miss Lulutia continued to sleep.

Based on Phil's past experience, his mistress, who is "drowsy in spring, tired in summer, and dozing off in autumn, and hibernating in winter," will probably sleep until next month again this year. This is also the nature of the dragon race - basically no dragon is not sleepy, and it is common for them to sleep for decades.

In short, after putting on her red uniform, quickly washing up, opening the Adventurers' Guild's shop, and sweeping the hall with a broom, Phil wiped the sweat from her forehead and was thinking about where to find some food to fill her stomach when she suddenly heard several cannon shots booming in the distance. Then she saw a group of knights galloping down the street, followed by a group of panting, sweating cat-like officials.

Next, band members dressed in brightly colored uniforms and holding various musical instruments, as well as all sorts of idlers who came to watch the spectacle, appeared one after another in the square opposite the Adventurers' Guild. All sorts of noisy clamor rose and fell, leaving Phili feeling deeply confused.

Why is it suddenly so lively outside? Today doesn't seem to be a holiday.

So he quickly ran out of the Adventurers' Guild, found a bystander who was watching the commotion, and asked him what had happened.

—The new lord of Totoro Town, the noble Princess Catherine Ingram, the Golden Dragon, is coming here from the capital to take office today!

Huh? This princess arrived so quickly?

The town hall's townwide cleanup in preparation for her arrival is still not finished!

Especially the sewer cleaning job entrusted to the Adventurers' Guild, that kobold warlock is probably still catching rats in the sewers right now!

Thinking of this, Phil couldn't help but look down guiltily at the paving stones under her feet, silently praying that she wouldn't cause any trouble later.

Unfortunately, his luck was always bad when big events happened...

Chapter Recommendation: "The Despicable Heir of the Supreme God"

I recommend a masterpiece by the veteran online novelist, Half-Frog, titled "The Sleazy Heir of the Main God." Maintaining the same style as his previous work, "Kantai Collection," it has already surpassed 200 million words, enough to keep you entertained for a long time.

"My real name is Wang Jianqiang (please don't read it backwards). I was determined to be the man who slept with the female god..." Later, after sleeping with the female god, I accidentally slept with the main god's space as well, so I changed my name to Wang Hao, courtesy name Ritian. This book's QQ group number is 564566543, WeChat official account: half-frog. Completed chapters: Dark Bible, Gantz, Highschool of the Dead, Death Note, Desire Academy, Ice Peak Demon Love, Cat's Eye, currently working on the chapter *Gundam SEED*.

Chapter 10, Offering an Explosion to the Petite Golden Dragon (Part 1)

Catherine Ingram, the eldest princess of the Golden Dragon Kingdom, the legal first heir to the throne, and currently the soon-to-be lord of Totoro Town.

Unlike most dragons who, due to their long lifespans, lack a sense of time and are prone to procrastination, Princess Catherine seems remarkably decisive. Rumors had just circulated from the palace the morning before, and by evening, a formal notification had arrived from the capital, Thousand Sails City. Before the officials of Totoro Town could even hold a private meeting to discuss how to welcome and treat this distinguished new lord, Princess Catherine had already arrived unannounced on the outskirts of Totoro Town the very next morning!

Yes, it's true that Totoro Town and the Royal Capital are only a day's journey apart, but you came way too fast!

The sudden arrival of the princess threw Totoro Town into chaos. All the contingency plans the town hall had just devised were rendered useless: the long-abandoned mansion hadn't been cleaned, and the potholed streets hadn't been filled. And to make matters worse, a certain poor kobold slave sorcerer was still wading through the town's sewers, torch in hand, cleaning up slimes and rats!

However, now that the new lord has arrived, we can't just kick her out again, regardless of whether the town is ready or not.

Well, to be honest, as the new lord, Her Highness could easily turn the tables and kick everyone in the city hall out.

So, although they were very unhappy about this sudden attack, the administrators of Totoro Town could only welcome and fawn over their new owners with trepidation.

In times of war or disaster, certain rituals and formalities might be simplified. But in these peaceful and prosperous times, grand displays are simply necessary. So, despite the extremely tight schedule, the city hall did its utmost to make the necessary arrangements.

First, colorful flags were hung on the main streets and central square of the town, and a large number of people were organized to clean up the filth and garbage on the road in front of the lord's mansion as quickly as possible.

Then, a band was arranged to play a welcoming tune, and all the officials stood outside the town to greet the new lord.

Finally, the entire town was mobilized at once, with people knocking on windows from house to house, ordering all residents to come out and line the streets to welcome the new lord's arrival.

Even Phil was given a small flag and then, looking completely bewildered, was ushered to the square to welcome Princess Catherine.

Looking out from his perspective, the central square of Totoro Town was teeming with cat heads, packed tightly together with tiny cat-like beings averaging only seventy or eighty centimeters tall. A few tall humans were interspersed among them, standing out starkly among the many feline creatures—at first glance, it looked as if a few kindergarten teachers were leading a group of bouncing, chattering toddlers, waving little flags on a school field trip or to a performance.

Well, anyway, at least the atmosphere looks pretty lively, doesn't it?

Amidst various meows and whispers and waving flags, Her Highness the Princess's procession finally entered the town.

First, a half-elf female guard in gleaming silver armor, carrying a golden dragon banner, walked at the head of the procession with a stern face, responsible for clearing the way. Next came a small cat band hastily summoned by the city hall, dressed in uniforms and playing music as they followed behind. Then came two court ladies in sleeveless white gowns, seated in an ornately decorated open carriage, smiling as they tossed flower petals to the surrounding crowd.

Next, Phil, who was mingling in the crowd, saw the adorable face of the new lord of Totoro Town.

—On a palanquin carried by eight kobolds sat a petite, incredibly adorable blonde girl. Despite gripping a ruby-encrusted golden sword tightly in public and trying to project an air of haughty authority with her flat chest, her tiny, doll-like figure and the pink dress piled high with lace and bows completely transformed her feigned majesty into pure cuteness, so adorable that even the cats' eyes lit up.