Toyokawa Shoko doesn't want to become a witch

It was a middle-aged human man in his forties, dressed in shabby clothes, unkempt and disheveled, looking less than human. He lay on the ground in agony, spitting out blood, his punctured lungs emitting a wheezing sound like bellows.

There was a witch's kiss on him.

His pupils suddenly contracted to their smallest size, and Xiangzi felt a strong wave of nausea rise to his throat.

Did I kill someone?

The Tale of Nirvana: Keeping to Your True Self: Chapter 69 Accidental Killing

The man lying on the ground stopped breathing after a few breaths.

Two shots hit his torso; one pierced his lung, and the other struck his spine. Even if Xiangzi hadn't fired a third shot, he wouldn't have lived much longer.

“Dead…dead?”

His golden pupils trembled violently.

It felt like my brain had been hit with a hammer, the impact resonating within my skull with a buzzing sound.

"I...I killed someone?"

As a magical girl, Xiangzi has killed many witches and familiars. Some of the witches and familiars look similar to humans, and some even disguise themselves as humans.

However, she felt no moral burden when she committed the murder, because it was a witch, a familiar, something that should not exist in this world. Even knowing that the witch was a magical girl in disguise, Xiangzi did not feel too bad.

They died the moment they became witches; killing witches is actually helping them find liberation.

Xiangzi always thought that way.

Therefore, she can pull the trigger on any witch without hesitation.

This wasn't the first time they'd seen corpses; many victims marked with the Witch's Kiss died before the magical girls came to their rescue.

But now...

Xiangzi realized he had killed someone.

Since she wasn't a magical girl, she couldn't sense magical fluctuations. Xiangzi couldn't tell whether the creature rushing towards her was human or a familiar; she was simply trying to protect herself...

It's just self-preservation...

Xiangzi tried to convince himself.

But then she saw that face, spitting out blood and foam, once again.

Living, breathing humans, ordinary humans controlled by the witch, humans with whom he had no grudge, were transformed before his eyes, from living people into corpses still warm, as time passed.

What did I do?

Disgusting.

How did he die?

Are humans such easy creatures to die?

why.

Does he know anyone?

Will people who knew him be saddened to know he died?

Will you avenge him?

Will I hate it?

The familiar smell of blood and gunpowder triggered related memories in my mind, with the image of my bastard father going crazy that night, the night he destroyed everything flashing through my mind.

That bastard dad, is this how he shoots at Mom and me?

Did he also point it at his own head and shoot himself like that?

Xiangzi leaned against the wall and knelt down with a thud.

"vomit......"

I vomited up the dinner I had just eaten. The sour smell of stomach acid, blood, and gunpowder filled my nostrils and rampaged through my skull.

Xiangzi barely managed to turn around, leaned against the wall, and slowly slid down.

Finally, he leaned against the wall, sitting beside his own vomit and bleeding corpse, gasping for breath.

The blood flowing from the corpse spread across the ground, reaching under Xiangzi's buttocks. The sensation, whether cold or warm, jolted Xiangzi awake.

"what!"

"It must have been very uncomfortable."

Toyokawa Shoko whispered in her ear.

"But is it really that hard to bear? You don't even know who he is."

“A homeless person, if he dies, he dies. No one will know anyway. You’ve thought that way too, haven’t you?”

He is not a witch, nor a familiar; he is just an ordinary person, an innocent bystander caught up in this mess.

How could I possibly have thought that way?

“Oh dear, ‘How could he have died? What a nuisance’... Haven’t you thought that way?”

Shut up.

I never thought that way!

“If I were the one who fired the gun, you could numb yourself and say, ‘Ah, I wasn’t the one who killed anyone, it was another personality inside me.’ Well… it’s not really numbness. Even legally speaking, it wasn’t ‘you’ who fired the gun, it was ‘me.’”

Toyokawa Shoko said in a slow, gentle voice.

"So from now on, leave these kinds of things to me. After all, I was born to take on the emotions you don't want to accept, the moral burdens you don't want to accept, and to do the things you want to do but dare not. I live for you, Xiangzi. You need to learn to use me, use me, and let me do things for you."

"I told you to shut up!"

Xiangzi finally managed to say what he was saying, only to find that the pungent taste that had filled his mouth and nose had disappeared.

Toyokawa Shoko mimicked a cat dream by making a gesture of zipping up its mouth.

OK, I won't say.

Toyokawa Shoko stood up, supporting herself against the wall with one hand. She wiped the grime from the edge of her mouth with her sleeve, calmly took out her magazine, and checked how many bullets she had left.

Seeing her calm demeanor, Xiangzi rushed up and punched his alter ego.

This punch was delivered with full force, and the sound was loud, a booming sound like a muffled thunderclap.

Xiangzi grabbed his other self by the collar and said, word by word:

“I don’t need you to do anything for me.”

"This is your own body, how could you be so cruel?" Toyokawa Shoko wiped the blood from the corner of her mouth and asked her with a smile.

"Then give it back."

If looks could kill, the other person would have been dead many times over.

"Alright, alright, I'll pay it back."

Toyokawa Shoko raised her hands in surrender, then took a step back, and in an instant, Shoko's perspective changed 180 degrees.

The sour smell of vomit, the fishy smell of blood, and the pungent smell of gunpowder instantly took over Xiangzi's senses. A burning pain followed.

Xiangzi immediately took out a medicine bottle from his pocket, poured out a small pile of pills—an absolutely excessive amount—with trembling hands, stuffed it into his mouth, and swallowed it with difficulty.

With an expression that said, "I knew this would happen," Toyokawa Shoko turned and walked towards the corner not far away.

You can't keep hiding from me forever.

After leaving a message, he disappeared.

Xiangzi stood there, stunned.

Until the pool of blood spread to their feet.

She glanced at the fallen corpse, then closed her eyes in despair.

"I still need to go find Chu Hua..."

brush--

The maze disappeared.

Chu Hua and Hai Ling were just ten meters away from Xiang Zi. They were carrying several people who looked like victims and putting them down by the roadside.

Chu Hua put the victim down, looked up, and saw Xiangzi standing dumbfounded in the middle of the road.

"Xiao Xiang!"

She rushed over and frantically checked Xiangzi for injuries. When she saw the wounds on Xiangzi's face, her expression darkened.

"Chuhua..."

Xiangzi's voice was hoarse, just like when Chu Hua found her in the pine forest that day—exhausted, fragile, and broken.

"Looking for someone... to help deal with this... there have been casualties."

Chu Hua then noticed the man lying next to Xiangzi.

"Someone died? Was it done by a familiar?"

Hai Ling walked up, squatted down next to the corpse, lifted his clothes, and clearly saw two round holes with charred edges.

"It's not a familiar, this is... a gunshot wound?"

"Yes, a gunshot wound."

Xiangzi opened her palm, and M1911 lay quietly in her hand.

"It was... an accidental killing by me..."

The Tale of Nirvana: Staying True to Yourself: Chapter 70 You Lacked Love Since Childhood (Bonus Chapter)

Miaomeng followed Mary for a walk around the church. Putting aside the tents and shacks pitched in the open space outside the church, there was actually a dormitory inside the church that could accommodate a dozen or twenty people, all of whom were children under the age of fifteen.

"This used to be an unlicensed clinic."

Mary said as she took Meow Dream for a walk around.

"The original quack doctor specialized in serving gang members, stitching up, removing bullets, and performing all sorts of emergency surgeries."

"How did it turn into a church?"

"That shady doctor must have done too many bad things and was punished by heaven for getting lung cancer."

Mary walked down the corridor, her high heels clicking on the floor.

“She sold the clinic before she left, and I used all my savings to take over the land and turn it into a church to provide free food and some basic medical supplies for the homeless.”

Miaomeng lay by the window, peering through the glass at the sleeping children inside.

The lights were off, but these little rascals were clearly not asleep. Moonlight shone into the room, and their big eyes blinked, reflecting the moonlight as they curiously watched Miaomeng.

Miaomeng made a face at the little devils inside.

Immediately, giggles came from inside.

Mary stormed out the door and gave the kids a lecture. But it was really just a pretense of anger. The group of children noisily crawled back into bed, grinning at Mary and saying they would go to sleep right away.

Mary could only sigh helplessly and turn off the light.

"It made you laugh."

Mary turned around and said to Meow Dream.

"Wherever there is."

Miaomeng smiled apologetically.

These little devils are less than a third as troublesome as she was back then, and their interactions with the nun made Miaomeng find them adorable.

The two strolled slowly to the backyard and sat down on the bench where Hailing had sat earlier.

Mary had already noticed that Miao Meng seemed to have something to say but didn't dare to, so she smiled gently.

"Ask whatever you want."

"Is this considered an orphanage?"