The Thirteen Trials of the Deceptive Monk

“You’ve even given me the prompts; you’ve turned this into an AI drawing.” Faris rubbed his hands together, picked up a seed, and said, “Let me do it! Flower, blue, rose, gradient, texture: frozen, elegant, beautiful.”

Lu Wenjun's eyes were subtle: "The fluency with which you speak... did you use AI to create erotic images...?"

"Bullshit!" Faris declared emphatically. "As a model liberal arts student in the 21st century, how could I not keep up with the latest technological developments? This is the result of my practical application of AI models during my vacation!"

"Keep talking, I'm listening..."

After another tremor, the magic seed burst forth from the image, and this time it revealed...

Revealing clothing pieced together from flower petals!

Her figure is so voluptuous it's terrifying!

A face with simplistic lines that immediately evokes the uncanny valley effect!

It was a plump, anthropomorphic rose maiden made up of many deep blue petals!

"..."

Lu Wenjun and Wilsa turned their heads in silence, while Faris was slowly hiding in the bushes.

Lu Wenjun lunged forward, grabbed him by the collar, and shook him violently: "How many of these did you refine, you bastard?! How come planting a magic seed results in anthropomorphic erotic images?! Your graphics card must be smoking from all that refining, you idiot!!"

Faris shook his head vigorously: "I've developed a habit... I can't help myself..."

"Just how filthy is your heart?! It's just a seed and a flower, what did you see to make such a connection? Tell me!"

Vilsa immediately buried the horrible rose back in the ground: "Replace it quickly! If anyone sees it, we'll never be able to clear our names!"

Faris raised his hand: "I...I...I'll get another one right away—"

"You're not allowed to go! Vilsa, you come here! We can talk about anything!!"

Velsa quickly closed her eyes and pondered: "Blue, nature, ice... strong!!"

Lü Wenjun screamed, "Something inexplicable has been mixed into the prompt!!"

The three of them immediately felt a slight tremor, and then the soil sealing the seed burst open, and a huge, deep blue, petal-shaped, thunderous fist burst out of the ground, striking Faris in the chin with a powerful uppercut!

"Guwa—" Faris landed after a 720° spiral in mid-air.

Lu Wenjun stared silently at the meter-tall, petal-shaped fist, almost speechless for a moment. Velsa approached and examined it closely for a while, then announced, "It's very powerful."

"It's over..." Lü Wenjun screamed, "We're really going to lose this time!"

Chapter 26 My Heart Is So Fragile

"I feel like we're doomed to lose this time," Lu Wenjun said listlessly.

All their afternoon attempts and efforts were ultimately crushed by that thunderous punch. After that, the three brothers chatted and laughed for a while before heading off to work or study. The truth was obvious: the brothers were simply not cut out for gardening. Competing for fun was fine, but winning was just wishful thinking.

He had just finished another extravagant night and was curled up on the small sofa like a dead dog. Mingxiao nudged him with her ear and said gently, "Learning to fail is also a form of growth..."

"I don't want this kind of growth!" Lü Wenjun exclaimed in frustration. "Someone has to be the winner, so why can't it be me?!"

"You're hopeless for taking even a small seasonal event this seriously," Hisamitsu commented.

Lu Wenjun gritted his teeth: "I had made all the necessary preparations, but that woman stole my partner! If I teamed up with Ling Gong and Jiu Jiu Mu—"

"You could catch a monster boar and team up with those two and still win," Jiuguang's assessment hit the nail on the head. "Besides, I'd also prefer to team up with Pershka; at least she can offer aesthetic advice and meaningful conversation. So, what could Mr. Nerd possibly do in that team?"

After hesitating for a while, Lü Wenjun said, "I can be responsible for livening up the team atmosphere..."

"Laughable, you're a complete loser!" Hisamitsu laughed loudly. "You're not even as good as a demonic pig, at least a demonic pig can provide food."

“Okay, I admit that my creativity in this area is indeed on par with that of the Demon Pig…” Lu Wenjun sighed.

Mingxiao, standing nearby, was shocked: "Oh my god! Sister, look, he's really given up! He's actually given up arguing with you!!"

Hisamitsu was quite shocked. She raised her hands in an attempt to comfort her roommate: "Hey nerd, you don't have to be so discouraged. At least you can try a little harder..."

Lu Wenjun curled up on the sofa, hugging his legs: "It's not a matter of whether I try or not, I have absolutely no talent in this area... What's the point of trying on a path where I have no talent... It's not like I don't use the Fangtian Halberd because I'm not trying..."

Hisamitsu's expression froze: "The topic suddenly veered in a strange direction?! Why did the halberd suddenly appear?!"

Lu Wenjun muttered to himself, "I can't even wield a spear or a crescent blade... I only fought bare-handed because I had no other choice... If I could use weapons, I wouldn't have been unable to even beat Fang Ying... If I could have read the original text back then, I wouldn't have been eliminated in the first round..."

"This is bad, Nerd is getting increasingly gloomy. He's speaking in a way no one can understand, and he's creating a terrifyingly somber atmosphere! The air around the sofa seems to have turned black!!"

Mingxiao pointed at Jiuguang in anguish: "Look what you've done! You've destroyed Wenjun's self-esteem!"

"Just how fragile is this person's heart?" Hisamitsu sighed, rubbing his forehead. "I'm telling you... don't overthink it like that. Maybe using some underhanded tactics during the match will work..."

"Aha, ahahaha, hahahaha... I guess I can only rely on cheating after all... In the end, I still need to cheat..."

Lu Wenjun was gradually turning into a withered gray. Mingxiao rushed up and shook him violently: "Wenjun! Wenjun, don't die, Wenjun!"

"What the heck? Was this guy always like this?! It's like the character design has completely changed!!" Hisamitsu exclaimed in surprise.

"He learned this from studying the original texts, and now he's reaping what he sowed." Mingxiao pouted. "I need to come over and coax him quickly, or he'll be depressed until tomorrow."

Hisamitsu pointed at himself: "Me? Me?!"

"Nonsense, you're responsible for your foul mouth."

Hisamitsu forced a smile and squatted down in front of the sofa: "Hey nerd... Lu Wenjun, don't be so pessimistic. You still have a lot of good points. For example, you're smart... you're talented... you're popular with girls... ugh..."

Lu Wenjun's face, which had just begun to show signs of improvement, began to turn ashen again. Jiuguang, covered in goosebumps, continued to force himself to speak: "Very skilled! Helpful! Relatively good-looking! Excellent cooking skills!"

Lu Wenjun reached out his hand to her, moved, "Waaah, Hisamitsu..."

"Hey, keep it up!"

Hisamitsu tried her best to be a friendly older sister, gently stroking the useless boy's head. She then turned and mouthed a very loud warning: (Stop! You're not allowed to take pictures!!)

Mingxiao, standing to the side, kept snapping photos with the jade pendant: "Keep going! Don't let him stop! I want to use this precious moment as my jade pendant's screensaver!"

Hisamitsu was shocked: "You good-for-nothing, how dare you—"

"Jiuguang..."

"Oh, don't be afraid, don't be afraid..." Hisamitsu quickly turned around and forced a smile, "Oh my god, what's wrong with this guy?!"

About half an hour later, our extraordinary magician, Mr. Lü Wenjun, finally returned to normal. He cleared his throat cautiously and said in a low voice, "Shall we both tacitly forget what happened half an hour ago?"

"Too late!" Hisamitsu said with a sour face.

Mingxiao had already printed out the photo and pasted it on the living room wall. In the photo, someone on the sofa was holding onto Jiuguang with a dazed expression, and Jiuguang's extremely stiff smile made it look like a loving mother and son.

She pointed at the photo and burst into laughter: "Hahahaha! Hahahaha!"

Hisami grabbed Lü Wenjun and shook him violently: "Useless! Homebody! Socially awkward! You're the one who's having an episode, and you've dragged me down with you!"

Lu Wenjun, now back to normal, wanted to argue, but remembering his embarrassing behavior earlier, he couldn't utter a word. After struggling for a while, he said, "How about next time when you're in an emo phase, I'll hug you instead..."

Hisamitsu was shocked: "Listen to this! Is this even human language? Your language skills are completely gone!"

"I surrender, I surrender," Lü Wenjun said desperately. "Senior, please delete the photos, I beg you... Can you explain what's going on? Why am I suddenly acting like I'm under a spell?"

Mingxiao put away the jade pendant and sneered, "Don't you even think about what you've done!"

Lu Wenjun looked confused: "What...what did I do?"

"You just randomly started learning on a whim without even finding someone to protect you!" Mingxiao poked his forehead hard. "Even the weakest of those things is still the Great Serpent Xiangliu! The Primordial Water God that Yu the Great fought back then, do you think your broken 'Tales' level character can even touch it?"

Hisamitsu stared in disbelief: "Your new technique is a fragment of a mythical level?"

Lü Wenjun stammered, "Ah, yes."

"You're asking for it! Are you crazy?!" Hisamitsu kicked him. "Oh, you're really something else. How have you managed to survive until now??"

Lu Wenjun covered his head and dodged, "Don't kick me, Miss, don't kick me... I thought nothing serious would happen at the academy..."

"If it weren't for the Great Sage Equaling Heaven's protection, you'd be finished by now." Mingxiao sneered. "Wenjun, your family's secret techniques are indeed impressive, but you should know that no matter what methods you used along the way, the knowledge still ended up in your head. The Xiangliu fragment contains more information than you as a whole person. You memorized such a massive amount of information overnight. Don't you think it will have any impact on you?"

Upon hearing this, Lü Wenjun froze on the sofa: "Could it be..."

“Water is not only the source of life, but also an extremely yin and cold substance. The flood disaster in Xiangliu is a manifestation of its ever-changing and yin-cold nature!” Jiuguang stepped on his butt and said irritably, “You learned assimilation and manifestation, fine, but of all times you learned concealment! What kind of technique is concealment?”

Lu Wenjun subconsciously said, "Change your technique..."

"Isn't that what happened?" Mingxiao followed and stepped over. "The whole person becomes like a water snake, naturally their emotions are unpredictable, their mind is full of negative information, so of course they are prone to falling into depression!"

"Holy crap! No way!" Lu Wenjun exclaimed in surprise.

“Were you always this competitive? You didn’t even participate in the theatrical event last fall and it didn’t bother you. Why are you so fixated on such an insignificant little festival?” Mingxiao pointed out the key point. “Being ambitious and stubborn are both signs of being fickle. You’ve only been learning for a few days now, so there’s still hope. But if left unchecked, your personality will likely be permanently affected.”

Lu Wenjun screamed, "Senior! Help me!!"

Mingxiao smiled proudly: "You're laughing? Even you, senior, wouldn't know."

"Senior?!"

"I'm sorry, senior, I've always been pretty strong since I entered the industry and I've never encountered anything like this before. I really don't know how to help you... Do assimilation experts have any solutions?"

Hisamitsu's eyes darted around: "Oh, it's not that troublesome... But why should I help nerd? It seems like it would be nice to just wear down his arrogance and turn him into a useless brat who's all high and mighty outside but cries and whines at home..."

Mingxiao pondered: "Now that you mention it, it does make some sense...it doesn't seem so bad after all..."

Lu Wenjun was a man of great stature and integrity. Without hesitation, he reached out and grabbed Jiuguang's other leg: "Fine! Then I'll follow you around crying every day from now on!! Let's see if I'll cry myself to death first or you'll get annoyed to death first!"

"Ugh! Just thinking about it makes me sick. Get lost, get lost." Hisamitsu waved his hand dismissively. "The solution is simple. First, get over this hurdle. Win this little festival to prevent you from holding a grudge. After that, learn a few positive, healthy, and uplifting manly techniques to counteract it, and the problem will be solved."

"I ask you, what does the word 'macho man' have to do with me? The most masculine technique I've ever used since my debut is the Jack-o'-lantern."

“Then you can also learn some spells related to weapons,” Mingxiao suggested. “Sharp blades are the best counter to evil spirits. The story of slaying snakes is a classic shared by various cultural circles. If you have a sword in your heart, the snake demon will naturally not dare to cause trouble.”

“I understand… If I learn one powerful spell, I have to learn more to counteract it, otherwise my mind will become unstable…” Lu Wenjun sighed, “Why is learning magic so troublesome?”

Mingxiao thought for a moment and said, "Actually, every magician who has just entered the world of Strange Tales has this problem. It's because the amount of information in Strange Tales spells is much greater than that in alternate tales. It's easy for Strange Tales to get information imbalanced when mixing alternate tales with alternate tales. It's just that your True Transformation is a fusion of spells, and you just happened to run into a high-level original text, so you naturally suffer more."

“Okay, then I’m still niche and unique…” Lu Wenjun struggled for a moment, “By the way, when will you two be able to lift your feet and come to your senses that this scene looks like some kind of M-oriented erotic composition?”

He was currently being carried on his back by his two roommates, one foot each, making him look like a human stepping stone. Upon hearing this, Hisamitsu covered his face with his long sleeves in surprise: "Eh—are we really going to say it—?"

Mingxiao chuckled to herself: "I thought you were the kind who secretly enjoyed it..."

"I have no such hobby, thank you! Get out of here immediately!" Lü Wenjun protested.

·

So, the next day.

"Friends, I've discovered a cruel truth," Lü Wenjun said heavily. "If we lose this competition, I might be so devastated that I'll become an unprecedented piece of trash."

"What else can I say, buddy? We have no choice but to lose now," Faris said.

Vilsa nodded: "I'll definitely lose to you!"

“I’m serious!” Lü Wenjun protested.

“It’s not too late to ask them to take you in,” Faris advised.

“You can kneel down and beg them, emphasizing your sincerity,” Virsa said.

"Don't you have any legitimate ideas to win...?"

"Seriously, the three of us would still lose." Faris shrugged. "If this were some kind of deadly arena or marathon, I wouldn't mind giving it my all, but how am I supposed to compete in a flower beauty pageant?"

"Aren't you an artist?! Show your artistic talent!!"

“What the hell does my magic art have to do with this…” Faris pondered, “Hiss…”

Lu Wenjun grabbed his arm as if it were a lifeline: "You've found your inspiration! Don't let it go!"

"I've got a stupid idea, I just remembered something," Faris said. "When we were discussing it on the forum, Chai Luo acted all cocky. Could he actually have some expertise in this area?"

“But he’s a sculptor, painter, and magician; he has nothing to do with plants,” Velsa said.

"As the saying goes, one method opens up a world of possibilities. He's an artist, after all; he might actually have some secrets." Lü Wenjun waved, "Let's go! Let's go ask our senior for advice!"

When they entered the Magic Art Styling Club's activity room, Chai Luo was intently carving a head with a small carving knife. Although the carving was not yet complete, it had a certain charm, so much so that Lü Wenjun recognized it at a glance as Cole's head sculpture.

"Senior!" Lü Wenjun called out with great emotion.

"No orders!" Chai Luo said warily. "And we don't accept secondhand magical tools either!"

Faris rubbed his hands together and went over: "Chai Luo, you bastard..."

"Huh?!" Chai Luo's eyes widened.

"Oh, sorry, I've gotten into a habit and haven't changed it." Faris coughed twice. "President, are you perhaps quite familiar with Kasuga-sama?"

Upon hearing this, Chai Luo burst into smug laughter, his arrogant demeanor amplifying several times over: "Ha! Hahaha!"

"What's wrong with you now?"