I have a life simulator.

Last month, Kitagawa Ryo suddenly expressed his desire to buy some books, so Sakayanagi Arisu simply sent over the large bookshelf from his hospital room, which is now crammed full of books.

No one appeared to stop her. Perhaps it was at the behest of both sets of parents, but it also showed their attitude: Kitagawa Ryo would probably stay here forever.

After realizing this, Sakayanagi Arisu felt that what she was decorating was not a "home" belonging to Kitagawa Ryo, but rather a "coffin" belonging to Kitagawa Ryo.

Especially after Kitagawa Ryo's condition continued to worsen, Sakayanagi Arisu's mood became increasingly bad.

Sakayanagi Arisu had never witnessed the death of another person in front of her. She was too young to remember when her mother passed away, and could only reconstruct a picture of her from her father's descriptions.

Her father had once told her that "humans can know what warmth is through contact with each other. This is very important," but in reality, no matter how warm Arisu Sakayanagi's palm was or how tightly she held it, she could no longer transfer her warmth to Ryo Kitagawa's right hand.

Moreover, Sakayanagi Arisu knew that this part would continue to expand.

She silently fed a segment of orange from her hand into Kitagawa Ryo's mouth.

Sakayanagi Arisu pinned down Kitagawa Ryo's still-movable left hand, forcefully pressing it against Kitagawa Ryo's chest and peeling the orange piece by piece, feeding it to him. Kitagawa Ryo's lips pressed against her palm, warm with a hint of cool juice.

But what kept flashing through her mind was that thin, long tube inserted through her nose, through which food, ground into a paste by a grinder, was poured into her stomach via her nasal cavity.

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Sakayanagi Arisu didn't come the next day. Kitagawa Ryo sat down at his desk after confirming this. He was already used to using his left hand and skillfully took down a thick notebook from the bookshelf.

In the simulation of Horikita Suzune, he devoted most of his energy to the heart disease of Sakayanagi Arisu, who was set up as his sister in that simulation, in order to resolve a knot in his heart about his sister.

Furthermore, after the simulation ended, Kitagawa Ryo used the rewarded Talent Stripping Card to strip away the experience, forming the purple [Healer] talent.

[Doctor (Purple): You have mastered modern medical techniques and have extensive clinical surgical experience. Your areas of expertise are cardiovascular medicine and surgery.]

But it's not enough.

As Kitagawa Ryo flipped through the relevant books he had ordered, he combined his experience with his thoughts. Horikita Suzune's simulation ended after Horikita Suzune resolved her inner conflict, but Kitagawa Ryo's research on Sakayanagi Arisu's congenital heart disease did not end.

[Heaven's Jealousy (Gold): Your body is extremely weak and you are unlikely to live past thirty, but in exchange, your intelligence level will increase dramatically.]

One of the reasons he decided to build the first simulation around this core talent was because of the massive increase in intelligence.

Kitagawa Ryo felt he was getting close to the answer.

While Kitagawa Ryo was writing furiously at his desk, Sakayanagi Arisu, who had been thinking all day, finally shared his thoughts with his father.

"Didn't you go see that child today?"

"Ah."

Sakayanagi Arisu nodded in reply. She had hesitated for a long time, but the moment she spoke, her hesitation vanished:

"Speaking of which, Father."

"I want to try studying medicine."

Chapter 73: Delicious

The talent [Approachable (Blue)] has been drawn.

[Approachable (Blue): You possess an innate charisma that makes it easier for you to gain the favor and trust of others. (Effective for both men and women)]

[Ichinose Honami's Self: Before each simulation begins, randomly upgrades three of her qualities (gold talents cannot be upgraded further, including initial and fixed talents)]

The talent [Approachable (Blue)] has been upgraded to the talent [Like a Spring Breeze (Purple)]

【Like Sitting in a Spring Breeze (Purple): You are naturally kind and approachable. Everyone who interacts with you will be deeply impressed and unconsciously increase their positive feelings and evaluation of you (effective for both men and women)】

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Today marks the fourth New Year since Sakayanagi Arisu and Kitagawa Ryo met.

Now nearly twelve years old, Sakayanagi Arisu has grown taller than before, but she is still a child. She needs to stand on a chair to reach the kitchen stove. As she looks at the ingredients bubbling in the pot, her thoughts drift back to a few years ago.

New Year's Day is defined as the most important day of the year. It's better for two people to spend New Year's Day together than one person, and it's even more lively with three people. This was the wish that the father had when he invited Kitagawa Ryo to celebrate the New Year with them.

If you're all alone, you can usually get through it, but on New Year's Day, the fireworks that burst in the night sky and the lights that illuminate every household will act like a mirror, making a lively scene all night long, as if it won't stop until it turns the person who was left behind back into a lost ghost.

Sakayanagi Arisu remembered her father's words very clearly, so at that time she was very much looking forward to Kitagawa Ryo's arrival. She had even planned a whole night's activities in advance, which was the only night that a child could stay up all night with a clear conscience.

However, Kitagawa Ryo did not come as promised that night. As it turned out, the two children did indeed have a sleepless night as planned. Sakayanagi Arisu stayed outside Kitagawa Ryo's ward until late at night before finally falling asleep.

The next morning, she went with her father to a shrine to ask for a talisman to protect the sick. Sakayanagi Arisu would never have thought much of this before, but she later realized that she definitely needed to find something at that time. The talisman was just one thing. If someone had told her that day that hanging a yak horn by the bedside could protect the sick, Sakayanagi Arisu might have gone to find a yak. ​​She had seen this kind of hairy creature in a book.

So, starting from the second year, having come to her senses or grown a year older, Sakayanagi Arisu gave up on amulets and instead looked for more helpful or practical New Year's gifts.

Sakayanagi Arisu still remembers that it was snowing lightly that day, very lightly, each snowflake was tiny and delicate, and the children by the roadside reached out to catch them, but by the time they landed in their palms, they had already melted into tiny water droplets, it was more like a rain than snow.

However, with the added atmosphere of the New Year, this snow, which could hardly be called snow, took on a romantic meaning. In fact, snow, like clouds in the sky, seems to always be favored by people, who entrust all kinds of emotions to it.

The children nearby were excitedly discussing the new e-cards that were being released this year. Sakayanagi Arisu had seen one of those things at Christmas: a thick, folded card that slowly unfolded to reveal a three-dimensional shape, like a magnificent castle rising from the ground on a table. And when it was fully completed, it would play pre-programmed electronic music.

For children, this is truly one of the newest, most fun, and most desired gifts.

Sakayanagi Arisu decided to follow the current trend. She went to a convenience store and bought the most expensive e-card. She didn't particularly care how many floors the castle inside was or whether the music quality was a little clearer. The main reason was that the most expensive one was the biggest, which meant she had more space to write.

As soon as she got home, Sakayanagi Arisu placed the large greeting card, which was almost the size of a book, on the table. She had just washed her hands and came back when she saw the cat that had jumped onto the table curiously examining the strange thing.

"Don't move it, this is for Liang."

Sakayanagi Arisu pulled out a chair and sat down at the desk, then patted Hotaru's head.

Because a newborn was born in the Kitagawa family, Kitagawa Ryo's pet cat, Hotaru, found herself in an awkward position at home. After all, no one wanted to see a cat in the nursery. So, Sakayanagi Arisu used Kitagawa Ryo as an excuse to take Hotaru into her own home and raise her.

In fact, she had already been raising Hotaru virtually with Kitagawa Ryo for more than half a year before this, and perhaps because of this, Hotaru's attitude towards her was quite close.

Upon hearing Ryo's name, Hotaru obediently walked away, and before jumping off the table, she affectionately rubbed against Sakayanagi Arisu's palm.

After resolving the cat problem, Arisu Sakayanagi began writing. She opened the e-card, and as a three-dimensional castle rose from the ground, the card started playing a piece of instrumental music loudly.

Hotaru was startled by the sudden noise and immediately jumped into Sakayanagi Arisu's arms. Sakayanagi Arisu searched for a long time but couldn't find where to turn off the music on the greeting card, so she could only hold Hotaru while starting to write.

Sakayanagi Arisu wrote a very good essay. Although the topic was still "writing based on a picture," she initially thought she could finish the greeting card quickly.

But the process was slower than she had imagined. To be precise, half an hour had passed since the clock on the wall started ticking, and Sakayanagi Arisu still hadn't written a single word, while the electronic music that started ticking had been playing for half an hour.

While unconsciously tapping her pen and passively listening to music, Sakayanagi Arisu actually grew to like the tune. She took out her phone and found the song recognition function in the music app. She had to admit that the most expensive greeting card had its reasons for being the most expensive. Thanks to the fairly clear sound quality, Sakayanagi Arisu quickly got the answer.

A famous piano piece composed by Beethoven—

"Für Alice".

Alice.

Upon seeing the name, Sakayanagi Arisu suddenly felt she had something to write about. She spread out the greeting card, picked up her pen seriously, and noticed that the scarf around her neck was getting in the way, so she simply took it off.

Feeling much better, Sakayanagi Arisu officially began writing.

"When I rewatched Alice's Adventures in Wonderland a few days ago, I realized that my favorite part was indeed the crazy tea party between Alice, the Mad Hatter, the March Hare, and the Dormouse."

"Of course, although I still don't understand why the Mad Hatter and Alice became a couple in the movie adaptation (I only learned this word from my classmate last month), nor do I understand why the question of 'why a raven looks like a writing desk' has now become a metaphor for 'I like you'."

"The only thing I care about is the punishment I received during that period."

"The Mad Hatter was reprimanded by the Queen of Hearts for wasting time by singing the wrong lyrics at a concert and was to behead her. He escaped the beheading punishment but was punished by time. He was forever frozen at six o'clock in the afternoon of a certain day, so his tea party will never end."

"At first I thought the Mad Hatter was a pitiful person, but then I realized that if time had stopped at night, wouldn't the Mad Hatter have become Sleeping Beauty, who never wakes up?"

When Sakayanagi Arisu wrote this, she paused for a moment. Perhaps influenced by Kitagawa Ryo, she also began to say some witty remarks intentionally or unintentionally.

"I wish time could stand still at this moment. I've often seen this description in other books before."

"Perhaps it was because I knew the rest of the story that I made such a wish."

"Freezing time at the most beautiful moment is not a bad ending."

"Even if it's repeated hundreds or thousands of times, or even more."

"By the way, I'm currently studying medicine."

"Although I am not as good as Liang in some minor aspects such as chess, Gomoku, and poker, please still have some faith in me."

"Mortals who are backward from birth can never escape the realm of mortals no matter what they do."

"But Sakayanagi Arisu is a genius, unlike the imposters in the White Room."

"I will cure Liang's illness."

"That concludes my wish for a Happy New Year, Liang."

Although Arisu Sakayanagi wrote the letter in one go with a straight face and no expression, she couldn't help but feel a little nervous when she handed the card to Ryo Kitagawa on New Year's Eve. The feeling of having someone read what you wrote in front of you was really strange, and the degree of strangeness was directly related to how important that person was to you.

"Actually, I have the magic to freeze time."

After reading the greeting card, Kitagawa Ryo placed the large castle on the table. His leg muscles had begun to atrophy, so he spent most of his time in bed. However, at his insistence, the nurses moved him to the sofa today.

"Eh?"

Completely surprised that Kitagawa Ryo would say something like that so quickly, Sakayanagi Arisu was slightly taken aback.

With a smile, Kitagawa Ryo raised his left hand. The movement looked quite strenuous, but he still managed to raise his arm into the air and then gently poked Sakayanagi Arisu's cheek.

"Clap-"

Immediately afterwards, the sound of a flash came from the side. It was unclear when, but Chairman Sakayanagi, who had been hiding behind the door, was kneeling on the ground, holding up a camera and pressing the shutter.

Their second New Year ended at this moment.

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On the eve of the third New Year, Kitagawa Ryo's condition worsened again. He began to have difficulty swallowing and had to be accompanied by a nurse throughout his meals. From this time onward, most of his food was gradually removed from his diet.

Around this time, Sakayanagi Arisu began to actively learn some basic cooking and culinary skills from the family chef.

Washing, sorting, and chopping vegetables.

Sakayanagi Arisu learned very carefully, step by step. She would always think back to when she peeled oranges for Kitagawa Ryo two years ago. She continued that meticulousness, cutting the ingredients on the plate one slice at a time.

The father did not stop any of Sakayanagi Arisu's actions over the years. He kept an eye on his daughter's safety and provided her with all the help he could. Just as Sakayanagi Arisu realized, he restrained his wife's love and passed it on to Sakayanagi Arisu along with his own love.

Hotaru squatted at the kitchen door of Sakayanagi Arisu; Hotaru had long since developed the good habit of not entering the kitchen.

So, for New Year's that year, Sakayanagi Arisu gave Kitagawa Ryo a dish she had made herself.

Sakayanagi Arisu brought them to the ward and fed them to Kitagawa Ryo one spoonful at a time.

Kitagawa Ryo used to always act like an adult in front of her, but now he has finally turned into a child.

"hot."

Sakayanagi Arisu could hear Kitagawa Ryo's soft voice, and felt as if she had been struck by an electric current, a faint pain shooting through her body, as if she had been bitten by something.

So she blew on the spoon she was holding a couple more times, and Sakayanagi Arisu tentatively touched the silver edge of the spoon. After confirming the temperature, she put it back into Kitagawa Ryo's mouth and watched as he slowly swallowed the food by moving his throat.

Even earlier, before she met Kitagawa Ryo, Sakayanagi Arisu had sketched out an image of her mother—an image she had never seen—from her father's fragmented words, combined with the books and examples she had read. And this image must have included the present scene.

She imagined her mother feeding her, and then imitated the blurry image of her mother that she had fantasized about countless times in her dreams.

Sakayanagi Arisu was never a child who lacked love, so she also understood that love comes in many forms.

Love, compassion, pity, romance...

The meal was eaten very slowly, and was even reheated halfway through, but Kitagawa Ryo still finished it all meticulously. He didn't comment, and Sakayanagi Arisu didn't ask either. She wiped Kitagawa Ryo's mouth with a tissue and then whispered in his ear:

"Happy New Year."

"cold."

Happy New Year, Alice.

This is the last "Happy New Year" that Sakayanagi Arisu has heard so far.

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Half of ALS patients will die within three years of diagnosis, and more than 5% of patients will not survive for more than five years. This year marks the fifth year since Kitagawa Ryo was diagnosed, and the fourth New Year he has spent with Sakayanagi Arisu.

It was even worse than the first year. Although Kitagawa Ryo was still conscious, he had lost the ability to speak. No matter how hard he tried to speak, he could only make a rough, hissing sound from his throat.

Sakayanagi Arisu began to demonstrate her culinary skills, the result of a year of learning, to Kitagawa Ryo.

She would meticulously recount how many hours the soup had been simmering and how many times the heat had been adjusted, and how the ingredients for that dish were extremely rare varieties that she had managed to buy with great difficulty. Occasionally, she would jokingly recount the amusing incident where she mistakenly added sugar instead of salt, causing her father to turn pale.

Kitagawa Ryo blinked as he looked at her.

As she spoke, Arisu Sakayanagi mentioned the sea. She said that she had gone to the beach many times with her father when she was a child, and she still misses those days.

The walking stick her father gave her a few years ago was no longer suitable, but the large sun hat could still block all the direct sunlight from her. Sakayanagi Arisu smiled and asked Kitagawa Ryo if she wanted to go to the sea in the summer. Kitagawa Ryo nodded to her, a small gesture, but she did agree.

So the two of them started talking about their plans for the beach. Actually, it was mostly Sakayanagi Arisu talking, with Kitagawa Ryo nodding or shaking his head occasionally. Fortunately, his eyes were so beautiful they seemed to be able to speak.

After discussing the plans for the beach, the food that Sakayanagi Arisu had ordered to be taken away had already been processed by the hospital staff. The food, which had been ground into a near-liquid state by a grinder, had lost its original shape and flowed slowly into Kitagawa Ryo's stomach through the nasogastric feeding tube.