Hikigaya Hachiman is still in the dark

This person is even willing to bend the school rules just to make trouble for me?

"Then Umi no Hoshi, please accompany me to take photos, and as for Tamasaka-san, then..."

"Yes, what should I do?" Tamasaka answered me with full energy and spirit.

"Just draw in the club room." Hearing my answer, Tamasaka fell limp on the table like a deflated ball. Damn, this person is too cute! Is it because I haven't seen Komachi for too long that I feel this way?

Umi no Hoshi looked at Tamasaka and sighed, "I'd better let Tamasaka go with you. I still have some work to do here."

"Eh? Is that okay?"

"Of course you can. You like watching the lives of people from other clubs, so just treat it as collecting materials. However, you can't cause trouble for the teacher."

"Kyouzou, you're the best." Tamasaka gave Uminohoshi a big hug.

What about my opinion? I am a teacher. Also, your relationship is not friends but mother and daughter, right? You are definitely a mother and daughter who have been separated for many years, right?

"Teacher, is it not possible?" Tamasaka looked at me pitifully.

"It's not impossible..."

"Yeah!" Tamasaka cheered, then she came over and pulled my clothes and walked out. Why did I inexplicably follow the student's rhythm?

"Hello, we are the editors of the school magazine. I think someone asked you to take photos before."

"Eh? Mr. Hikigaya is here in person? This is really unexpected." A person who looked like a manager started talking to me. Out of concern for Totsuka, I of course chose the tennis club first.

The current tennis club president is a handsome boy with glasses on his high nose bridge. Eh? A sports guy has to wear glasses? It seems so weird. But his eyes look quite sharp. This guy seems to be called Tezuka Kunimitsu.

"Um... hello, I'm also from the school magazine editorial department, my name is Yuuki Tamasaka." Perhaps unable to stand the aura of the tennis club president, Tamasaka hid behind me and introduced herself in a low voice.

"Um, hello, Tamasaka-san, if possible, could you please come out for a moment?" Tezuka seemed distressed, not knowing whether he should extend his hand.

This is a common thing. If you extend your hand when the other person doesn't want to, and the other person doesn't respond to you at all, it will be really embarrassing...

It's so embarrassing, it makes me want to die.

"Sorry, this child is a little shy."

"I can see that." Before Tezuka could finish his words, Tamasaka stretched out her little hand and looked at Tezuka timidly.

"Huh?" Tezuka looked a little surprised.

"Xiaozou said that we shouldn't cause trouble for the teacher." Tamasaka said in a low voice.

"Oh, I see. Nice to meet you. Hello, I'm Tezuka Kunimitsu, right? Tamasaka-san? Nice to meet you." Tezuka stretched out his hand and shook hands with Tamasaka. Tamasaka still seemed very shy, and after shaking hands, she immediately retracted her hand.

"The teacher has a good student."

I looked away a bit embarrassedly. Why could I never establish the authority of a teacher?

"You guys go on with your club activities as usual. I'll show you the photos after I've taken them. If you're satisfied, it'll be OK."

"Yeah." Tezuka responded and ran back to the playground to continue playing tennis.

I took out my camera, focused it, and pressed the shutter button while looking at Tezuka.

It reminded me of when I was in high school, Isshiki asked us to make a free information magazine, and I took the initiative to help Totsuka take a photo album. I was so excited at that time that I seemed to have almost used up all the space on the memory card.

Totsuka is still very busy as a tennis player. The intensity of his training every week seems to be quite high. I really don’t know how Totsuka, as an angel, manages to survive.

"Um, Mr. Hikigaya, I think there's something wrong with the shooting angle." Tamasaka gently grabbed the corner of my clothes.

"Hmm? How should we take pictures?" Although Tamasaka is a fool, she is so good at drawing after all, so I believe her photography skills will not be too bad.

“It should be a little lower.”

"Is that so?" I moved the camera down a little as Tamasaka asked.

"Yes, it is like that"

Wow, the photos are indeed clearer this way, and the characters look more dynamic and youthful.

"Indeed, it feels much better this way. It seems that you like photography, Tamasaka."

"No, I only know how to draw. It was Xiaozou who liked photography. But when I was in junior high school, Xiaozou seemed to have suddenly stopped taking photos. My techniques were all taught to me by Xiaozou at that time."

"Eh? Did Hai Zhixing like photography before?"

"I like it very much. I remember Xiaozou won an award before. Then I don't know what happened. Xiaozou no longer likes photography. Even her personality has changed a lot, although she is still as gentle as before."

"Personality? Wasn't Sea Star this kind of personality before?"

"Well, you should be more frank than you are now. Xiaozou's personality wasn't as awkward as it is now."

Chapter 19 You are so pitiful

This girl, I finally found the opportunity to change. Human change is always accompanied by pain. Maybe something happened in junior high school that caused her personality to change drastically. If I can find it out and successfully enlighten her, I might be able to solve this problem perfectly, and then complete the task assigned by Mr. Hiratsuka, push aside these two troubles, and continue my simple and easy campus life.

This incident should be considered a perfect solution.

"Tamasaka-san, do you know what happened?" Although I always feel guilty about extracting information from innocent girls, I have no choice but to do so in order to get out of trouble.

"I don't know. Xiaozou didn't talk much during those few days. I just felt it was weird. There was nothing I could do if Xiaozou didn't want to talk."

The clues were interrupted again... After a lot of effort, I finally found the key to solving this game, but the game told me that I had to go through a set of dungeons to get the clues.

What kind of rubbish is this? Get lost now!

"Um, Mr. Hikigaya? Can you show me the photos you took?" Tezuka's voice woke me up to reality. I quickly handed the camera to Tezuka. Tezuka took the camera with both hands. After a while, probably after looking at the photos, Tezuka respectfully handed the camera to me again.

"Thank you, Mr. Hikigaya. The photo is now ready."

"Ah."

"Then thank you, Mr. Hikigaya." Tezuka bent down and bowed to me, then ran back to the court to supervise the players' training.

"Where do you want to go next?" I asked Tamasaka with my head down. Maybe it was because of my cooperation with Isshiki, I habitually asked Tamasaka where she was going. It seemed that when I cooperated with Isshiki before, we also took turns to decide where to take pictures.

"Okay? Let me decide?"

"We are working together after all, so it's up to you to decide."

"Well, let's go to the painting club!"

Are you still interested in painting? A person's hobbies should not change easily. If something can change so easily, it certainly cannot be considered a hobby, such as the guitar in my room that is gathering dust.

Guitar man, you are so pitiful.

"Mr. Hikigaya! Welcome to the painting club room."

As soon as I entered the department room, I was shocked by the grand welcome. Most of the students in the painting department were female students. They were dressed in neat school uniforms and bowed to me at the door of the department room.

"No matter what, there's no need to do this." I smiled bitterly. I couldn't remember when I was so popular. Yes, it seemed that Hai Zhixing had told me before that I was quite popular among girls because I was the editor-in-chief of the school magazine. However, I was still shocked when I saw it myself. I always thought that school magazines were just things that boys used to make paper airplanes and girls used to gossip and then throw them into the trash.

"No, Mr. Hikigaya's appreciation of Shia's Dawn was really great, very well written! If possible, please help us appreciate our paintings today."

That was just when I was writing a novel before, the editor forced me to use public funds to visit some art galleries and the like on the grounds of improving the aesthetics and collecting material. This was really the cunning of adults.

"It's not impossible."

"Great!"

“I must draw the painting that I am most satisfied with this time.”

"By the way, I want Mr. Hikigaya's signature on the painting. I think I can show it off to my classmates when I get back."

"Don't take too much time. I may have a lot of work to do next."

"OK."

The girls expressed their joy with cheers, then returned to their own drawing boards and began to paint seriously. I did not miss this opportunity and took out my camera to take pictures seriously.

"That." Tamasaka gently pulled the corner of my suit.

"What's the matter?" I looked down at Tamasaka and found that Tamasaka was looking at the people painting with glowing eyes.

"If you want to paint, go ahead. If you want to work, I'll do it."

"Is it really okay?" Tamasaka asked in a low voice, seeming very embarrassed.

"No problem. I'm very confident about my job." After all, I've been working as a handyman in the service department for three years in high school, so I still have some confidence...

"Yeah." Tamasaka replied to me cheerfully, then ran happily to an empty drawing board.

After about ten minutes, the girls finished their work one after another. In fact, most of the paintings were similar to those they had drawn before, and they were just made some simple modifications.

"The colors of this painting are good, but the lines are not prominent enough because of the focus on colors. It would be better if the lines were strengthened appropriately."

"The lighting and shadows in this painting are not handled very well, and it cannot fully highlight the mood of the characters in the painting."

"For this one, the overall layout is not very good. It looks a bit messy."

I appreciate each painting carefully, and to be honest, it's really tiring.

But soon, the girls were attracted by Tamasaka on the other side. Perhaps realizing the professionalism of Tamasaka's painting, the girls watched Tamasaka painting quietly, but their eyes would reveal sincere admiration from time to time.

I didn't miss this moment and used my camera to capture Tamasaka's serious expression while she was painting.

After a while, Tamasaka seemed to have finished her painting. She jumped in front of me like a bird and opened her drawing paper. When I saw the content, I was stunned.

The painting by Tamasaka is of me holding a camera. The lines, layout and colors are all handled very well, giving people the feeling of a master painter. Since the angle is well chosen, it is clear that the person in the painting is working hard. Because the painting is so good, I couldn't believe it was me.

"Is that me you drew?" I asked for confirmation. After all, I didn't seem that handsome in my impression.

"Yeah." Tamasaka replied with a blush, and then she handed me the drawing paper: "This is for Mr. Hikigaya, as a thank you gift for the orange juice today."

Wow, it feels like I got a great work of art at a very small price, so I will definitely take it home and decorate it well.

"Does the teacher like it?"

"Yeah, it's not bad. I like it."

"If the teacher likes it..." Before she could finish her words, Tamasaka shook her body and fell to the ground with a "bang".

"Tamasaka, are you okay?" I helped Tamasaka up in panic.

"Xiaoyou has not been in good health since she was a child, so she rarely goes out."

The words of the Sea Star echoed in my mind for a long time. I hugged Tamasaka and ran to the infirmary in a hurry.

"Um, Umi no Xing, is Tamasaka okay?" I looked at Umi no Xing who was looking at Tamasaka worriedly beside the bed in the health room. Maybe because she ran here, Umi no Xing was still breathing slightly.

Umi no Hoshi touched Tamasaka's forehead, then touched her hand, and finally sat there as if she had relaxed.

"It's okay, she's just overworked."

"Tired? Will you faint?"

Star of the Sea looked at me in surprise, and then she gave me a cold gaze.

"Teacher, don't you understand?" the voice was almost questioning.

Being stared at by the sharp eyes of the Sea Star, I felt uncomfortable all over. Why should I, as a teacher, be questioned by my own students? Even I have things I don't understand. Why do I have to act like I know everything? This kind of teacher probably only exists in GTO or Denpa Teacher...

"It's just like what Hiratsuka-sensei said. Hikigaya-sensei knows a lot of things, but he knows nothing about people's feelings and their hearts."

The familiar tone reminded me of the neon night when I met Yukinoshita on my way back from helping Isshiki prepare for a joint event on Christmas. Then, when I was confused about my future, doubting what I was looking for, and feeling that the reality I prayed for was false, Mr. Hiratsuka's words were like a guiding light that warmed me in the cold night and helped me find the direction I was pursuing.

“When you are thinking, never make the mistake of thinking about what you really need to think about.”

"But, Hikigaya, it's impossible not to hurt anyone. The mere existence of a person will hurt others unconsciously. Whether alive or dead, they will continue to hurt others. If you are connected to others, you will be hurt, but if you are not connected to others, you will also be hurt..."

"If even thinking is distressing, then try to struggle and be distressed - otherwise, you will definitely not get the real thing."

"For the few of you, this period of time is like everything. However, the reality is not like this. Even if the situation is different, it will still reach the same result. This is how the world works."

I still remember these words. In my life, I have been desperately thinking about the answers, thinking about what I am looking for, and thinking about the truth between us. I am still troubled, and still don’t know if I have entered the hearts of Yukinoshita and Yuigahama, and whether I have changed them. In these four years, in a place I don’t know, they must have experienced something, just like I was experiencing things they didn’t know in the university where they were not.

Come to think of it, Yuigahama also told me this. On the bamboo path illuminated by electric lights, Yuigahama tightly grasped the corner of my clothes, tears streaming down her face. Her trembling voice shook my heart and tore apart my lies.

"Please consider other people's feelings a little more."

"Why do you understand so many things but not this?"

Yes, why don’t you understand?

Something, somewhere, has gone wrong with my way of life...

From the past to the changed me now, there has always been a mistake that I have no idea of.

"Xiaoyou..." My messy thoughts were interrupted by Hai Zhixing's words: "She is forcing herself. She will be tired, but Xiaoyou still forces herself because she doesn't want to cause trouble, doesn't want to be disliked, and doesn't want to be abandoned again."

"That's why Xiaoyou is like this. She doesn't rest even when she's very tired, and tries desperately to please others..." Hai Zhixing's tone became more and more angry, like a volcano that had been accumulating for many years and suddenly erupted.

"I hate this kind of Xiaoyou and feel sorry for her. There is definitely something wrong with her being around us."