Loneliness and Rock and Roll with Band Observer

"Generally speaking, it's the other way around... Is this okay?" Qiu Hui sighed, "I can't keep treating until August."

"Why not?" Liang asked as a matter of course.

"...Why can you?" Akie helplessly answered Ryo's question with a rhetorical question, "When I say well-off, I mean relatively normal. Don't really think of me as some rich lady... oh, right."

Qiu Hui suddenly thought of something, so she asked naturally.

"Come to think of it, Ryo, what's going on at home? Why do you often have no money to eat?"

"My family runs a hospital, so my parents don't interfere with me much." Liang replied, "Basically, they give me living expenses every month and let me decide how to spend it."

"Oh, is that so...wait, opening a hospital?"

Qiu Hui suddenly realized that something seemed to be wrong.

"Does opening a hospital mean that you own the entire hospital? You are not an employee who gets paid, but an operator?"

"That's about what I mean. Any problem?" Liang asked.

"Then why is the living expenses not enough?" Akie was puzzled. "It should be plenty, right?"

"If I were to ask why... because my pursuit of musical instruments and equipment is endless."

Liang had an expression like the protagonist of a boys' comic, and spoke some passionate lines that seemed to be true but were not.

"...Actually, he just spends money recklessly, right?" Qiu Hui sighed.

"It's no fun if you put it that bluntly," Ryo said while chewing some tempura.

After swallowing the food, she asked as if to respond to Qiu Hui: "Ah, actually, there is something I really want to know."

"What?"

"Akie seems to be in a tight financial situation," Ryo said. "Although I don't know much about light novels, since she can publish her works and sell them in bookstores, her income should be higher than that of a full-time convenience store employee."

"That's for sure." Akie nodded. "Although there will be big fluctuations due to the different sales of each book, to be honest, the absolute value is still relatively high."

"If that's the case, then by high school student standards... you should be extremely wealthy, right? After all, a high school student's food, clothing, housing and transportation are supposed to be borne by their parents. If you still have disposable income at the level of a working person in this situation..."

Having said this, Liang paused for a moment, and his expression became a little more serious.

Because the conclusion is obvious.

"...Actually, when I was chatting with Hong Xia, she mentioned you a little bit. She was worried that you might have had a conflict with your family... or even worse."

Faced with Liang's seriousness, Qiu Hui, who was just chatting casually just now, suddenly became nervous.

……really.

Because everyone cares about me, so they will notice it more or less.

Qiu Hui lowered her head slightly, feeling a little guilty for having kept the secret all along.

The story of me running away from home and the true situation of my family.

These are things I don't want to talk about easily even to my friends.

Or rather, because we are friends... that’s why I don’t want to say it.

"Can you tell everyone about your family's situation?" Liang asked directly.

"I..." Qiu Hui didn't know how to respond.

I don't want my identity to affect anyone.

I don't want to be attracted by everything my identity represents, or be scared and keep my distance.

Just like the classmate who took me in under the influence of my sister and whom I thought was my "friend".

These concerns prevented me from speaking directly...

Qiu Hui closed her eyes and shook her head gently.

...but this is not appropriate.

I should no longer let concerns stop me from taking action.

If you hold back because you are hesitant, the consequences may be worse than simply doing the wrong thing.

If you make the wrong decision, you may regret it.

But even so, it is much better than watching the situation deteriorate without making any decisions and being unable to do anything.

Even if you don't want to talk about your situation, you should still... speak your mind honestly and explain to everyone why you are doing so.

"I'm so sorry."

So, Qiu Hui spoke.

"My family situation is quite complicated, and I don't know where to start. If I tell you, I'm worried that it might affect my relationship with everyone. But if I don't tell you, everyone might imagine things to be worse than the truth, which would add to everyone's psychological burden."

Yes, I am friends with everyone who has ended the band... or, as Hong Xia said, we have a "family"-like relationship.

They are worried about me, and that's the truth, not my self-righteous arrogance.

On the contrary, it is arrogant to think that no one cares about your ideas.

Therefore, we must face up to the possibility of causing psychological pressure on others because of ourselves, and try our best to resolve it with a sincere attitude.

This is what a friend should do. After going through this incident with Aine, Akie also had this thought.

"Just as Liang guessed, for some reason, I am basically out of touch with my family. Although my school tuition is still paid by them, I have to rely on myself for other financial resources, including rent and other expenses."

"So that's how it is... Are you having a conflict with your family?" Liang asked.

"Yes, although the responsibility may be entirely mine, but now that things have come to this..."

Qiu Hui shook her head somewhat painfully.

Maybe I ran away from home just because of some insignificant misunderstandings.

But now... everything that has accumulated over the past few years has probably widened the gap between us into an insurmountable abyss.

Now I have more or less established myself, and am leading a relatively stable and comfortable life.

and so……

"At this point... there is no need to think about these things anymore."

She concluded somewhat dejectedly.

"Ryo, I'll tell everyone in person the next time we get together. Although I'm having a conflict with my family right now, there's no need for you to worry about me."

"I can handle the current situation perfectly, so everyone just pretend that this doesn't exist and treat me normally."

Perhaps, unnecessary concealment will also create estrangement.

So, Akie told Ryo everything with the honesty that a friend... or "family" should have.

Chapter 61: Seriousness lasts no more than three minutes

"……Yeah."

Liang put down his chopsticks and nodded slightly.

"I'm a little uncomfortable with you suddenly telling me so much, but I roughly understand what you mean."

After saying that, Liang turned around.

"Even though you said not to worry, I think given Nijixia's personality, she would definitely care, right?" Ryo commented, "She can be a little too enthusiastic sometimes."

Qiu Hui put down her teacup and asked, "What do you think?"

Liang didn't answer directly: "How about you guess?"

"I don't think you're the kind of person who would take the initiative to care about things like this," Akie said bluntly.

"You guessed it right." Liang nodded, "To be honest, sometimes I don't even understand my own family affairs... let alone other people's family affairs."

"So-called family conflicts... I feel like they are something only the parties involved are qualified to discuss."

Although Liang said this calmly and in a nonchalant tone, like a casual chat, Qiu Hui still cared a little about what she said.

"Only the parties involved are qualified to talk about it?" Qiu Hui repeated, "Generally speaking, the parties involved will be blinded by personal feelings and will not realize the truth of the matter."

"Is there anything else besides personal feelings in the family conflicts among high school students?" Liang asked in a condescending manner, as if she herself was not a high school student. "It's not some boring issue like the division of family property. That's another matter."

"Is that so..." Akie responded thoughtfully.

After reaching this point, the topic suddenly stopped.

Some subtle tacit understanding seemed to make them both realize at the same time that this was not a suitable topic of conversation during dinner.

So for the next period of time, they temporarily focused their attention on the food in front of them.

It was not until Liang had almost finished eating the contents of the tempura platter that she spoke again, calling Akie's name.

"What's wrong?" Qiu Hui responded.

"Actually, I have something to ask of you."

"It's rare that you would say that."

Qiu Hui turned around, her attitude slightly more serious.

"Tell me, what's the matter?"

What came into view was Liang's profile.

Her expression, which usually stood somewhere between cold and indifferent and empty-headed, became slightly more serious at this moment.

"You joined the band for the commercialization of the library, and you are about to sign a contract with the agency on behalf of everyone, right?"

"Not so fast." Qiu Hui shook her head. "We just need to gradually start going through the process. In addition to going through the procedures, negotiations also take time. The first draft of the contract may have to be scrapped and rewritten by then, which will take even more time."

"Really? So you've already considered that possibility."

After saying that, Ryoya turned around and looked at Akie.

"This band was originally founded by Hong Xia. She didn't have any particular pursuit of commercialization, and I didn't become interested in the band for that reason in the beginning."

"Although Akihime probably already knew that... I am a person who values ​​individuality. I once had a falling out with band members because I didn't like the idea of ​​following the crowd."

"That being said, I don't object to your plan to end the band. Because, I trust you."

A restrained but sincere smile was reflected in Liang's pupils.

"You know how to please the industry and the audience, while also knowing how to retain your own personality."

"So, Akie, I want to ask you to make the Ending Band a successful and enjoyable group."

She picked up the cup of barley tea from the table and handed it to Akihime as if she was going to clink glasses with her.

"I think I helped you with your friends."

"So I hope you can help me with the band stuff, too."

Qiu Hui smiled and said, "Didn't I already treat you to a meal as a reward?"

Having said that, she still picked up the teacup in front of her.

"A meal alone is not enough. My price is very high." Liang smiled.

"I knew it." Qiu Hui raised her teacup.

"cheers."

Using tea instead of wine, the two of them clinked the teacups in their hands against each other like office workers, making crisp sounds.

In an atmosphere filled with an inexplicable sense of struggle among the passionate young people, the two of them drank up the tea that had already cooled down and was therefore easy to drink.

This feeling of deliberately imitating adults but with some differences made Qiu Hui feel quite comfortable.

"Huh..." Akie put down her teacup. "I think a ramen shop is surprisingly suitable for talking about music dreams and the like..."

At this moment, her cell phone suddenly rang.

“Who’s calling at this time… ah, it’s Aine after all.”

She raised her head and looked at Liang: "Can I take a call for a while?"

"You don't need my approval for this kind of thing."

Ryo smiled and shook his head.

She looked at Akie, whose expression changed systematically after the call was connected, then turned around and focused on the ramen in the bowl that she had not yet finished.