Loneliness and Rock and Roll with Band Observer

Maybe it's my illusion?

Chapter 146 Please stay with me for a while

"Actually, I already contacted Suyo this morning," Akie said, "She said she needed to think about it for a while."

Although she was still wearing a casual combination of a T-shirt and shorts today, Aiyin could see that, unlike the large-sized pain clothes she was familiar with before, Akie's current dressing style clearly took into account factors such as matching and slimming.

It must have been Miao Meng who gave the advice, after all, they all live together.

Come to think of it, I kind of want to live with Senpai as well. Aine thought absentmindedly.

She was thinking about Akie, while Akie continued to talk about the band.

I invited my seniors over here on the pretext of discussing band matters, Aine thought.

But now my mind is full of my predecessors.

Akihime on the opposite side was describing the details of her relationship with Su Shi, as well as some of her subjective speculations about Su Shi's thoughts, in her usual calm and steady tone.

But Aiyin's mind was blank, so she hardly listened.

Her eyes remained on Qiu Hui's face, and all kinds of related associations emerged in her mind.

It was really scary that I turned out like that last night.

When did I start to have the idea of ​​relying on my seniors to that extent?

"...Anyway, I'll try to contact them first."

Akie seemed completely oblivious to what Aine was thinking, and just kept analyzing the situation.

“Ah? Ah… I see. Anyway, thank you very much, senior.” Aine smiled awkwardly.

Oh no, I was thinking about my senior so much that I didn't hear what she was saying...

"Don't thank me yet." Qiu Hui shook her head, "There's not much I can do right now..."

Stupid senior. Aine thought. There are so many things you can do.

You just need to spend more time with me. My heart has become quite fragile because of the band!

Senior, please hurry up and seize the opportunity to take advantage of it, okay? You obviously like me, right?

"……well."

Thinking of this, Aine sighed somewhat depressedly.

"What's wrong?" Qiu Hui asked, "Is there any problem?"

“Nothing.” Aine shook her head. “It’s just that I feel like… I’ve lost something. Maybe it’s because I got used to it before, but I didn’t expect that it would be so important to me.”

"Well, the more you're used to something, the more empty you'll feel when you lose it," Akie sighed.

She was probably talking about the band, Aine thought.

But I am mainly talking about you, my senior.

Although the band is also very important to me, after realizing that its original purpose was to revive CRYCHIC, which has nothing to do with me...

...I always feel that I can no longer look at it with the same eyes as before.

At this moment, Aine suddenly thought of the lamp.

Xiao Deng said that he wanted to form a band for life. But I didn't agree at that time, I just said that we could form a band together until after the first performance.

Now that things have turned out like this, I haven’t... broken the agreement with Xiao Deng, right?

Aiyin couldn't help laughing. How disgusting! I actually thought like that.

"Hey, Senior."

Aine and Akie looked at each other.

"So, are you going to look for Su Shi next?" she asked casually.

"Yes." Qiu Hui said as a matter of course, "Because I need to communicate with her."

Aine didn't answer or react in any other way. She just stared at Akie's face.

It was as if he wanted to capture every detail with his sight.

The current situation is just like playing a game of "who laughs first?"

Akie wasn’t good at this kind of thing, so she quickly gave in and turned her head away with a light laugh, avoiding the sight of Aine who seemed a little too serious.

"...Don't stare at me like that." She smiled shyly.

Although Akie said that, Aine didn’t intend to look away.

On the contrary, she even leaned forward a little.

"Senior, I don't want you to go look for Su Shi."

Aine said with a smile.

"You still remember what happened last night, right? At that time I was really... very... how should I put it, thinking about it now, I am a little scared."

Hearing Aine's nonchalant voice, Akie shrank back unnaturally, like a frightened bird.

"The news at that time has been retracted." Akie responded, "It is indeed scary. I will pay close attention to what was posted."

“Hehe, I won’t tell you what’s inside, Senpai.” Aine chuckled, “You’re so shy.”

Also, if you knew that my desire for you was that serious, you would also be troubled, right?

"But!" She changed the subject and patted the table lightly, "Why did you think of contacting Su Shi first at this time?"

She widened her eyes slightly, stood up, supported herself on the table with both hands, and looked down at Qiu Hui condescendingly.

“Ah… Well, Aine seems troubled, so I think we should solve the problem of the band as soon as possible…”

Qiu Hui answered hesitantly. She didn't know why she couldn't express her opinion confidently.

Was it because of the subtle sense of oppression that Aine was emitting at this moment?

"Oh, really. Senpai, that's why no one liked you before because you always thought like that."

Aiyin sighed and sat back in her seat, feeling disappointed.

"Rather than looking for Suze at this time, I think it's better to spend time on a 'problem' that I don't know if there's any hope of solving..."

When she said this, Aine’s ears started to turn slightly red.

"...It's better... to stay with me for a while."

She smoothed her hair nervously, and her original momentum weakened by three points.

"That makes sense." Akie nodded.

Although she can agree with Aine's point of view to a certain extent, she also has her own opinions.

“I am happy to offer you comfort, and I agree that this can fill the void created in your heart by the band’s problems to a certain extent,” Akie responded in a subtly official tone, “But if the root of the problem is not resolved…”

"Okay, stop talking."

Aine shook her head and gave a bitter smile.

Qiu Hui looked a little uneasy after being interrupted: "I'm sorry, am I..."

"No, you are right, Senior."

"But... I didn't expect you to start from this direction."

Aine lowered her head.

"I thought that Senpai would take advantage of the fact that my defenses were broken because of the band's affairs and swoop in to make me like him even more."

“Wait a minute, Aine, you…” Akie became noticeably more nervous.

"I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem right to say such things now. Not to mention that this is actually my fault."

Aine clenched her fists slightly and felt her eyes become slightly moist.

"But I still want to ask you something. Does Senpai already... dislike me?"

Chapter 147: Selfish Desire

Actually, I have always been a very selfish person.

Chihaya Aine thought so.

When I joined the band, it was just for boring reasons like wanting to fit in and stand out.

I gradually started to care about the band's affairs, and my relationship with everyone improved little by little, simply because I began to enjoy the feeling of being with everyone.

I actually always do things according to my own temperament. I do it when I feel like it, and give up when I don't.

“I’m really sorry for still saying this after all this.” Aine said with a forced smile, “I was the one who rejected you in the beginning, but I’m still asking you this kind of question…”

"There's nothing to apologize for." Qiu Hui shook her head gently. "Whether you are willing to accept the other person's feelings is a matter of personal rights."

“But!” Aine raised her voice slightly as if she was going to argue. Although she didn’t quite understand why she should argue about such a thing, “I have already rejected you, but now I am thinking about your attitude towards me…”

"It's your personal freedom to change your mind," Akie replied a little stiffly, "and you don't need to apologize for this either."

Aine was stunned.

“Why is this…?”

She reached out her hand and gently wiped her tear-filled eyes.

"Don't burst into tears all of a sudden." Qiu Hui looked over anxiously and worriedly, "Did I, did I say something wrong?"

“No.” Aine shook her head vigorously, not knowing whether to laugh or cry, “It’s your personal freedom to have such an opinion.”

Choked by her own words, Qiu Hui closed her mouth in embarrassment.

“Senior, you keep saying things like rights and legitimacy.” Aine seemed aggrieved for some reason. “I obviously did something so excessive to you, don’t you have any…even a little bit of pain?”

As a result, Aine has been claiming that she was at fault, while Akie has been trying to clear Aine of responsibility.

"...Of course there will be."

Akie admitted quietly.

“But, since everything Aine did was completely justified, the only person responsible for these negative emotions is me.”

She adjusted her glasses and said seriously.

She has always tried her best to follow the principles and logic that she believes to be correct.

"My duty is to control the impact of these negative emotions on myself, especially to prevent them from overflowing and hurting other people in turn."

Looking at the serious-looking Akee, Aine felt a... very, strong urge.

My seniors are completely different from me.

I am selfish, but Senior, it seems like he has never thought about his own affairs.

If you feel hurt, just cry. If you want something, just ask for it.

When it comes to things that I care about, what's wrong with doing my own thing?

At this time, they are still talking in official language, saying things like not to hurt other people...

Just seeing Senpai like this already... made me feel very painful...

But at this moment.

The sudden ringing of a cell phone interrupted their conversation.

"Sorry, wait a moment... ah, it's Suyo."

Qiu Hui looked at the screen of her mobile phone, and then looked at Aiyin in front of her who seemed like she would burst into tears in the next second.

"I...I'll...take the call first."

Qiu Hui said this without any confidence and pressed the answer button.

"Moyo-san? Ah, yes, we did talk about this this morning..."