Loneliness and Rock and Roll with Band Observer

Qiu Hui was indeed confused and a little worried.

Neither Deng, Lixi, nor other members of the band have contacted me on their own initiative.

"I don't know the reason either." Hailing said, "Actually, it was my own decision to come to Togawa-san."

"...I understand." Akie shook her head. "If there is any new situation later, I will take the initiative to contact Hachiman-san. I have something else to do now. See you later."

After saying goodbye to Hailing, Qiu Hui sighed softly.

Now is not the time to worry about those things.

“Aine, shall we continue?” She looked at her lover beside her.

Chapter 4: Prisoner in the Tower

at the same time.

Inside the penthouse suite on the 45th floor.

Nagasaki Suyo stared at the message record and realized something.

Mom didn't come back again tonight.

They said they were going to discuss some big project worth billions.

Nagasaki Suyo wasn't quite sure what that meant exactly.

All she knew was that she would spend another night alone in this luxury suite that was as luxurious as a hotel.

I didn't go out the whole day today.

In fact, she hardly went out in the past few days.

The suite was like a luxury hotel, with complete facilities, and the food and frozen food stored could last for a long time. On the other hand, every time he went downstairs, he would waste a lot of time in the elevator car, so if there was nothing important, Su Shi was usually too lazy to go out during the holidays.

I used to be a band member, but now even that reason is gone.

Now Su Shi is imprisoned in the comfortable cage she built for herself.

"..."

Su Shi faced the mobile phone screen, a trace of melancholy emerging in his heart.

I had made an appointment with Qiu Hui, and she said she wanted to chat with me; but she ended up saying she had something urgent to do in the afternoon and broke the appointment.

The worst. Su Shi frowned and sighed softly.

Do you think my matter is not important enough? Although it is natural for Akihime to think so, but if that is the case, wouldn’t it be better if she didn’t pretend to care about me from the beginning and didn’t follow me all the way here like that?

No one asked her.

Su Shi thought indignantly.

At this moment, she was sitting in front of the tea table that she had used to entertain guests. In front of her was a beautiful white porcelain tea set with gold edges, and the tea inside was no longer steaming because it had been left for too long.

It would be nice if I could find someone to chat with, she couldn't help but think.

She couldn't help but pick up her phone again and scan the message history.

Since that day, Deng and Lixi have not sent any messages to me.

Xiao Deng doesn’t seem like the type to actively try to communicate, and it always feels like she’ll be tripped up by some weird ideas.

As for Li Xi...it seems that she didn't like me very much. Because she hated Xiao Xiang, and as long as Xiao Deng was around, everything would be fine.

On the contrary, Aiyin often sent me messages after that day, asking me what was going on and when I would be back.

However, recently even she seems to have stopped messaging me.

Although he felt a vague sense of blockage in his heart, Su Shi still felt more relaxed.

If everyone really doesn't need me anymore, that would be a good thing.

It is not without irony that at this point, she feels that she seems to be able to understand what Toyokawa Shoko did.

"I'm quitting the band."

"It's my own problem."

"There's no rule that everyone must be present before you can practice, right?"

On that rainy afternoon, the words that Toyokawa Shoko said with a cold face in front of everyone flashed through Su Shi's mind like slides.

What I wanted was CRYCHIC, but what everyone wanted was a new band that belonged to each other.

Since we are fundamentally pursuing completely different things, then going our separate ways may be the only option.

Does Xiaoxiang, then and now, also look at me in the same way?

Her ideas are completely different from mine, so she is so heartless to throw away everything that once belonged to us?

After the initial grief and panic dissipated, Nagasaki Suyo is now trying her best to find an excuse that can convince herself.

She found it as she wished. So, like a shipwrecked person who finally found a piece of wood to cling to, she chose to believe in and practice this idea.

When it comes to the CRYCHIC issue, she is considered a victim; but when it comes to the new band issue, she seems a bit like the perpetrator.

In order to gain some solace as a "victim", she must try to rationalize and accept the logic of the "perpetrator".

Even though he knew that this practice might be twisted and despicable, Su Shi could only grit his teeth and choose to accept it.

She felt she had no choice.

"……I was wrong."

Su Shi muttered to himself in a low voice.

So I should be exiled...

...No, perhaps this is more like a despicable way to escape punishment than a punishment.

She thought of Toyokawa Shoko. She had hurt everyone at CRYCHIC. She should have atonement for this, but she escaped punishment by disappearing.

No matter how sad or angry I feel, I can't change the fact that Xiaoxiang is gone. The only thing I can change is my own thoughts.

Thinking about it this way...

...Perhaps the fact that things turned out like this is also the result of my own actions.

Perhaps this unbearable loneliness is the bitter fruit I should swallow.

Su Shi smiled self-deprecatingly.

Maybe it’s not a bad thing that senior Qiu Hui doesn’t come to see me.

She was willing to spend time and energy on me and care about my ideas, but this was just to convince me and to help Aion get the band back to its original state.

Since I can't possibly agree to her real request, then maybe I shouldn't continue to accept her kindness...

"……well."

Su Shi felt as if his heart was being strangled by some force.

Not to mention that she was also someone who had been hurt by me.

Suyo recalled the previous scene. At that time, Aine became depressed because of Rakuna's matter, and Akie-senpai was also distraught because of Aine's condition.

Did Akie already have those thoughts about Aine from that time on?

Recalling the noises he had heard during the previous training session, Su Shi became more certain of his judgment.

Although Akie was not an official member of that band, she was undoubtedly on Aine's side.

What I did must have caused her a lot of trouble, right?

Therefore, it may not be a bad thing if Qiu Hui has other things to do.

This way, I can escape from her more easily.

This way, I won't have to pay back the debt I owe.

Su Shi picked up the cold black tea on the table and drank it all in one gulp.

So be it.

She stood up, her eyes dull.

He slowly walked to the sofa in front of the TV, sat down, and pressed the button on the remote control.

The extra-large LCD screen projects colorful images and the sound system emits noisy sounds.

Su Shi didn't particularly care about the content of the TV programs. She just wanted to hear other people's voices, even if it was just a digital signal from the TV station.

What are you doing at this time?

She was bored as she watched the host on TV talking about trivial topics with a smile on his face, and thought to herself.

"..."

His hand reached out to the phone somewhat uncontrollably.

"..."

I always feel like this is not good.

"..."

But I still want to do it.

So Nagasaki Suyo picked up her phone.

"Can you talk to me?"

In a trance, I sent this message to Qiu Hui.

"I want to talk about something other than the band."

Somehow, another sentence was filled in.

Chapter 5 The Band of Theseus

I know I shouldn't get involved with you all anymore.

But I also hope there is someone to face it all with me.

Then, perhaps the only choice is Senior Akiie.

After all, she did say something like, "You can't just leave me alone at this point."

Thinking of this, Su Shi felt like laughing a little. Although I think this is probably just an exaggerated way of talking to get closer, but I can't help it, I think... I still like this.

Even if she was acting so close to me just for Aine, I didn’t hate the idea.

It's better to say...that's it.

Su Shi closed her eyes, relaxed her body, and let herself melt into the comfortable and soft sofa cushions.

Qiu Hui is not obsessed with the band itself.

As for me, I actually don’t really know what I want right now.

It's just because I don't want to face everything alone, so I instinctively seek someone's company.

She waited quietly on the sofa for a long time.

There were no message notifications, except for the automatic reply from Qiu Hui.

What is she busy with now? Probably work.

After all, I learned about her situation when I chatted with her before. She had a conflict with her family, and now she is self-sufficient through writing and band activities.

"Work...ah." Su Shi muttered to himself.

To be honest, it's a bit hard to imagine.

My mother doesn't have the energy to accompany me because she is busy with work, and sometimes she still needs my care.

But Qiu Hui is also busy with work, but she is the one who takes care of others.

She said she had a conflict with her family and they hadn't been in touch for a long time.

Then, is she also afraid of loneliness?