After choosing to leave, they regretted it.

Rationally speaking, this is the best option.

Unlike the failure two years ago caused by the huge disparity in strength, this time the empire had a strong army and was the attacking party, so there was no situation where one could do one's best but still be defeated by fate.

Even Chris dared to say that as long as she took on this challenge, she would definitely succeed.

But this kind of cognition is meaningless. Chris's problem can never be explained by reason.

Even if the best path was right in front of her—even if it had been right in front of her from the beginning, and she had a group of people like her family and her master pushing her forward, Chris just couldn't take that step.

The reason is simple - fear.

The crushing defeat two years ago was not just Chris's failure.

The army was dispersed and slaughtered, and the people who did not have time to escape were imprisoned. Several important cities fell, including Lilbas, which had been guarded by the Karseid family for generations.

Also, those eyes that were passionate and expectant before the war became cold and even hostile after the war.

Insulted, framed, imprisoned, and exiled.

Whenever Chris tried to stand up, these things would emerge from every corner of her memory, like countless cold hands, dragging her back into the abyss.

This situation would not happen unless Aize, his master and the object of his admiration, was around.

Because she knew that Aize would never fail.

But now, Aize's attitude says it all - he agrees with his father's idea and is happy to support it.

Unreasonable.

In the darkest corner of her heart, Chris blamed her master's ruthlessness countless times.

Respect, admiration, and even worship, these positive emotions from others, whether it is a priest, a noble or a businessman, are sought after and will rack their brains to obtain them.

Only Aize regarded it as extremely poisonous and tried to avoid it as much as possible.

Is this necessary?

Yes, staying rational, staying calm, and knowing yourself are all right, impeccable and correct in theory.

But, is it really necessary?

Anyway, with me here, Christina Karsade is just a ridiculous loser who can't get up. So what if I'm gone?

Yes, it won’t matter if I’m missing.

Anyway, Aize - whether it's his master or his father, doesn't intend to accept himself like this.

It would be better to just die.

There is no difference, you can't survive anyway.

Yes, just do it.

After all, when I suffered defeat two years ago, I lost so many people and made such a big mistake. I should have done this then.

Because of my own timidity and a little unwillingness, I was unable to do it in the end.

But it's different now.

Although he did not have the courage to cheer up, he did have the courage to commit suicide due to the sense of loss he suffered, and it was very strong.

That's it, confirmed.

You need to think carefully about how to die, because——

——"Because I believe her."

"Woo——"

In the midst of a chaotic thought that I could no longer express, the words I overheard a few days ago flashed through my mind for some reason.

This made Chris, who lowered her head and almost curled up into a ball, let out a whine and felt a sharp pain in her head.

The blue-haired girl pressed her temples and shook her head vigorously.

No, no, no.

What was I thinking just now? How could I have such an outrageous plan?

It was also at this moment that she realized through the touch of her palms against her forehead that her hands were pale and cold, as if they were a corpse without any warmth at all.

The blue hair was also soaked with sweat, and each strand was distinct and stuck to the hair and forehead in a mess.

"...What am I doing?"

When he looked up again, he saw his master standing close to him, his face full of worry.

"Master, I just..."

"……never mind."

"Hey? Master...what did you say?"

"Forget it. Just pretend I didn't ask that question. As for this expedition... I'll find another way."

Aize shook his head and sighed softly.

Ten minutes had passed without Chris realizing it.

During this time, he watched as the girl's breathing became rapid and her expression became darker. Her nails inadvertently dug into her palms, and even crimson liquid seeped out and seeped into the cracks between her nails.

Not to mention the cold sweats, pale face, and even chills all over the body.

Aize even worried at one point that she might just die.

According to the original plan, with all the preparations laid before and the added pressure from this incident, Christina should be able to get out of the predicament.

But that's not the case.

The shadow of that failure far exceeded Aize's expectations and even exceeded his imagination.

why?

If it's just failure, can it really make people become like this?

Or is there some other deeper reason that even the person himself is not aware of?

Not sure.

And it doesn't matter right now.

Although Aize was harsh in words towards his disciple Chris, he still cared about her very much in his heart in all aspects.

He couldn't bear to continue like this.

What else can I do?

forget it.

If she is destined to never get over it and can only pretend to be a fanatic to gain some self-comfort, then so be it.

"You lie down and rest for a while. It's okay to take a nap if you can. I'm going to negotiate with the Marquis and we have to overturn what we agreed on."

Having said this, Aize stood up.

The moment their eyes met, Chris couldn't dodge and saw what she least wanted to see.

Disappointed and helpless.

No matter how desperate the battle situation was, no matter how powerful the enemy was, the two emotions mentioned above never appeared in Aize's eyes.

According to Aize himself, it's not that he doesn't have these two emotions, he just hides them without leaving any trace, that's all.

But now, because of himself, even Aize's emotional management has been overloaded.

A strong sense of self-loathing immediately surged from deep within her heart, almost knocking Chris onto the bed again.

"Okay, stop thinking about it! Rest quickly, be obedient, quickly!"

Aize stepped forward and supported Chris, and their hands immediately overlapped.

The touch of Master's hands feels a bit like a girl's.

This was Chris's feeling when the two met and shook hands for the first time more than a year ago.

This is no way.

In the original world, Aize was just a student and a otaku. He had never done any heavy physical labor and his exercise was very small, so there was no chance for his skin to become rough.

And after becoming a hero, everything is set.

With the healing power brought by the protection, no matter if it was scars or calluses, they would be treated as damage and repaired. His hands and body had not changed since then.

And only at this time would Chris believe that the master she admired was really an ordinary person who had nothing to do with war before he became a hero.

Honestly, that word is kind of funny.

Even without mentioning those incredible achievements, the double pressure from enemies and teammates that Aize has endured since coming to this world is enough to drive any ordinary person crazy.

In the more than one year that she served as Aize's guard and deputy, Chris witnessed everything with her own eyes.

While Heidi was intoxicated with her royal status and gloating over her inheritance rights, Eize was confronting the nobles.

While Rosaline was busy preaching and didn't bother to pay any attention to worldly affairs, Aize was arguing with the church.

When Leah, in a fit of emotion, came up with those completely absurd combat objectives, Aize stayed up all night analyzing intelligence and formulating plans to make the impossible possible.

After all, he is not God.

What a miracle costs is the hard work and efforts of the miracle creator himself.

Chris saw all of this and felt sorry for him. She repeatedly questioned the dark air: Why can't anyone share some of his burden?

This person cannot be Chris, because she doesn't think she is qualified.

He took the initiative to provoke conflicts with Leah and others, saying that it was to help Aize vent his anger, but in fact he was venting more, venting his own cowardice and incompetence.

And now, this person already exists, Villian.

Could this person be myself?

This question has appeared in my mind countless times in the past, but it was quickly blocked by various negative emotions and I could not continue thinking.

Now, Master’s loss and fatigue are clearly revealed before our eyes.

If there is such a possibility, can Christina Karsade try it?

"What you need are believers, what I need are companions."

The words he had overheard before reappeared in his mind as if possessed by a ghost, overlapping with the image of Aize, who was standing right next to him, with the hands of an "ordinary person".

"Master, I...I will give it a try!"

Taking advantage of the moment when her brain was paralyzed, the blue-haired girl used all her strength to say this sentence.

Chapter 74 Opening

Although the world, some nobles and even subordinates believed that Aize could foresee almost everything and keep everything under control.

But the facts have proved time and again that this is not the case.

For example, this time, when he had already given up, Christina Karlsade's attitude suddenly took a 180-degree turn.

All it took to go from refusing to obey to actively accepting was a few simple eye contact - this was also considering that Aize was just unilaterally confused and didn't output any information.

So, he was stuck there all of a sudden, staring at Chris lying there in surprise with an expression as if he was looking at something indescribable.

Then—as a matter of course—he reached out and pressed his hand on the other's forehead.

"...No, she doesn't have a fever? What's going on? Is she too emotionally agitated and has lost her memory? Or is she suffering from some mental disorder? Wei'er, can you check her out—"

“That’s not right!!”

Pushing Aize's hand away, the blue-haired girl sat up from the bed, looking a little mad:

"Didn't you, Master, tell me to go just now? Why are you acting like this again? Be careful or I'll die in front of you. I'll really die in front of you!"

His face flushed red, he was anxious and angry, he even jumped off the bed, clenched his fists and kept hitting Aize, forcing the latter to run away with his head in his hands, and even kneeled in the corner.

It's not difficult to understand Chris's reaction.

For her now, it is still quite difficult to talk about cheering up for the future of herself, her family, and even the empire.

But as a witness to Aize's life from obscurity to today, and also as the one who was saved, she sincerely longs for a position where she can stand tall and proudly beside him.

Longing was the driving force that gave her the courage to break through the suffocating shackles.