The peaceful daily life of the heroine in the other world

We went together to feed the goldfish in the pond, to watch others play basketball, and to sit in the pavilion and talk about interesting things that happened in junior high school.

Maybe neither of them knew how to bring up that incident so as not to embarrass each other. As they walked on the street, they tacitly understood each other and did not mention the last confession.

Wandering around aimlessly and blindly, as if guided by fate, they finally... returned to the tennis court that day.

Looking at the couple playing on the court, Asahimaru suddenly spoke.

"Amamiya-san, have you ever thought about who you'd be with in the future?"

"No." Yu Gongyi shook her head.

"I haven't thought about it either." Asahimaru said with his head down, "In fact, even my own gender issue...I still have some anxiety."

"..Why?"

"Because...as a boy, I'm not tall, and my appearance and voice are also girly. If I say I want to be a man, I'll be laughed at."

"If I had stayed silent about my boy status like I did in middle school, people wouldn't doubt me and would have thought I was a cute girl. I could have gotten along well with everyone..."

"So, until now, I haven't admitted to my classmates outside the tennis club that I'm a boy."

"I'm afraid and anxious, and sometimes I feel uneasy, when I think about expressing my true thoughts and being treated as an outsider."

Asahimaru tilted his head back and looked at the face of the tall girl beside him.

"And...Amamiya-san, you are tall, have a great figure, are very pretty, are good at studying, and are very gentle."

"As a boy, Asahi Mataki had average grades and no masculinity at all."

"I have to tilt my head up to look the girl he likes in the eye. Even standing on tiptoe, I'm still not as tall as her... Every time I realize the difference between us, I actually feel very inferior."

"But if it's Asahi Mataki, who's a girl, at least... I wouldn't feel so bad."

"But... no matter what, whether I'm a boy or a girl, no matter how my mindset changes, I still like you, Amamiya-san."

"Even if I'm destined to be rejected, destined to be disliked, I still want to convey this feeling to you once again."

The petite white-haired girl stared closely into the girl's gray eyes and spoke loudly as if she had mustered all her courage.

"Amamiya-san!"

"I like you, please, go out with me!"

They are also in the second week: Chapter 196 Go to Thailand for surgery first...

Everyone has some memories that they don't want to recall.

The shame of the middle school years and the sadness of the death of loved ones.

For Amamiya Yi, she seemed to have few such memories.

The girl realized the heaviness of life when she was in elementary school. The troubles of reality robbed her of her childish fantasies, and from then on she became incompatible with the childish children around her.

Study, wash dishes in a restaurant, do odd jobs, do housework when I get home, continue studying, and get all the scholarships I can get.

This is how she went through elementary and junior high school.

On many golden afternoons, when she sat by the window reading a book, she could hear people laughing, see her peers running on the playground, sweating on the court, laughing and playing carefreely.

Sometimes she would look up and glance out the window, envying the white clouds flying in the sky and jealous of the pairs of white wings flying freely in the air.

Then she thought of her home, her parents who were getting thinner and thinner while working three jobs at the same time and gritted their teeth to make a living and meet the deadline of repaying the loan at the end of the month.

Just play less and rest less, it’s nothing, just be patient a little longer, be patient a little longer.

You'll feel better soon.

Thinking of this, those feelings of unwillingness quickly faded away.

She turned around and swallowed the restless words and symbols on the book, along with the emotions in her heart, bit by bit.

again and again.

Day after day.

Until graduation from high school.

But in the boring memories, she recalled them carefully and found that she was not that lonely.

Although other classmates did not dare to approach her because she was too cold, there was an inconspicuous figure who always quietly stayed by her side, bringing some comfort to the girl's lonely heart.

Asahimaru, her seatmate.

A victim of cognitive distortion, a girl who is "a boy who looks like a girl".

In the original setting, she was a pure little boy-girl.

However, due to the [plot switch] problem, her real gender was changed to female, but [cognitive distortion] based on the original setting allowed her to maintain her self-perception as a little boy.

This is a very complicated situation.

Asabi-kun, who suffers from "self-gender identity disorder", thinks he is a boy, but he looks like a girl.

However, from a physiological point of view, Asabi Makaki is a girl with a flat chest, and in the eyes of others, Makaki is also a girl, even when she takes off her skirt.

But as long as she immediately identifies herself as a boy, it will produce a cognitive distortion effect, causing those who want to find out her true gender to directly assume that she is a boy, ignore her beautiful appearance, skip all logical layers, and believe in this result for a period of time.

This is different from the situation in high school when he took the initiative to tell the members of the tennis club his "real gender" in order to prove himself to Amamiya.

When she was in junior high school, she had never taken the initiative to tell others about her gender.

Mataki, with the figure and appearance of a completely cute girl, was naturally mistaken for a girl by his classmates.

Telling the truth that she is actually a "boy" will likely make her be seen as an alien by her classmates. This is undoubtedly a very difficult thing for Mataki who wants to be a "man".

Before she had memories of her past life, Amamiya Yi did not have the heroine's ability to ignore "cognitive distortion".

When she was in junior high school, Amamiya Yi noticed that Asahi Makaki was very hesitant about his gender when Asahi Makaki had never revealed his "male" identity, so she encouraged him to stick to his inner thoughts and decide the future of his life according to his own wishes.

So, from that day on, the girl, who was self-contradictory under the influence of "cognitive distortion", began to fall in love because of the girl's sincere encouragement that touched her.

Asabi Makaki quietly looked at her profile and back, and saw how hard she studied every day. During the three years of being classmates, he fell in love with her little by little, had a crush on Amamiya Yi, and became firm in his feelings.

"You have to become a man. Only then can you become Amamiya-san's boyfriend!"

She naturally thought so, but because of her timidity and fear of being rejected and disliked, she regretted not being able to confess her feelings to the other party in junior high school.

so...

On the day we meet again.

She poured out all her feelings for the past three years, mustered up the courage, and confessed her love to Amamiya Yi.

No response was received last week.

Then... confess again!

.....

"——I like you, please date me!"

Under the setting sun, the petite white-haired girl no longer dodged.

She stared closely into the girl's gray eyes, and as if mustering up all her courage, she firmly grasped her hand and said seriously, "Even if I'm rejected, I still won't regret it."

"I just want you to know that I really like you, and I just want to know your response!"

"..."

Amamiya Yi looked into the girl's slightly trembling eyes for a long time before speaking softly.

"I don't want to date you."

At this moment, the girl finally got the answer.

Although, that wasn't the answer she expected.

The clouds in the sky floated slightly, covering up the remaining red of the sunset.

The eyes that were originally illuminated by the setting sun gradually dimmed as the clouds swayed.

Mataki opened his mouth slightly and his eyelashes fluttered a few times.

Then she pursed her lips slightly, narrowed her eyes, and showed a very forced smile.

"Hmm...it's just as I thought..."

Mataki gently released the girl's hand, took a step back as if to keep his distance, then turned around and said softly, "...Thank you Amamiya-san for being willing to give me the answer. This way, I...will have no regrets."

In the evening, the wind gradually grew stronger.

Two girls dancing in the wind.

Something crystal clear, carried by the wind, passed the edge of sight, bloomed in the air, scattered on the ground, and dissipated bit by bit.

"..."

The girl with her back to Amamiya Yi had her shoulders trembling slightly and could be heard sobbing slightly.

She seemed to be trying very hard to hold it in, trying to tilt her head back and straighten her back to make herself look less disheveled and stronger.

But she couldn't help it, and she lowered her head little by little, as lost as a pet abandoned by its owner.

"Amamiya-san..." she sniffled and cried, "Can you go a little further?"

"I'm about to cry...please...leave me alone...quietly..."

..How can there be no regrets?

The girl I had secretly liked for three years, the love I had maintained for so long, was rejected so easily before it even began, and it ended just like that.

All the secret expectations, hopes for the future, the places I wanted to go with her, the things I wanted to do with her, the words I wanted to say, all turned into bubbles at this moment.

"...Asahib-kun, please turn your head."

"..."

"Asahib-kun."

Amidst the gentle calls over and over again, she couldn't help but turn around sobbing, looking at the girl who was much taller than her with red eyes.

She couldn't see the other person's expression clearly, as tears blurred her vision, but she felt that the other person must think that she, who had boasted before confessing that she would not regret it even if rejected, was... lame, useless, and pathetic.

In the haze, with a sad heart, she saw the tall girl walking towards her.

The girl didn't say much, but took out a handkerchief from her dress, gently stretched out her hand, and wiped away her tears.

Asahi Makaki felt ashamed being treated so tenderly as if she were a child by the girl who had just rejected her confession.

But she couldn't refuse the tenderness at the moment, and had no way to push the girl's hand away. She even shamefully developed expectations and a bit of luck because of this tenderness, which made her feel even more pathetic.

Yu Gongyi lowered her head, wiped the girl's tears, put away the handkerchief, and spoke softly.

"My answer from before hasn't changed. I still don't want to date you, Asabi-kun."

At this moment, her words completely rejected Asabi Makaki's confession. There was no ambiguity or empty words, and no room for turning back, leaving no hope at all.

But it is these words of affirmation, these answers that leave no unnecessary thoughts, that are the best.

But what puzzled Asabi Makaki was that the decisiveness in Amemiya's words did not match her gentle actions now.

Could it be that he still wanted to remain friends, so he comforted her like this?

"Why...are you still so gentle to me?"

After stopping crying, the girl couldn't help but whisper, "...Wouldn't it be bothering Amamiya-san to be liked by a useless and useless person like me...would it be better to abandon me and sever ties with me now..."

"do not talk like that."

Amamiya shook her head and interrupted her, "Asahib-kun also has his own talents and things he's good at. Besides, it takes a lot of courage to speak your mind."

"Now, can you calm down, be quiet, and listen to me?"

The girl's voice was as clean and clear as ever, yet a little ethereal. Just a touch of gentleness in her tone would make it very suitable for comforting others.

"Hmm..." The girl took a deep breath and nodded slightly.

"First of all, I want to apologize for not responding to your confession right away last week."

Amamiya looked into the man's reddened eyes and said apologetically, "That was the first time in my life that someone confessed their love to me. I couldn't respond easily, and I didn't know how to respond. I could only go back and spend more time thinking about it."

"Also... the reason I refuse to date you is not because I hate you, nor is it because you are not good enough."

"It's because Asabi-kun is a boy."

Upon hearing this, Asahimaru was slightly stunned, "What...do you mean?"