Warhammer: Start with a dog.

Chapter 842 Where is this godforsaken place?!
"...I can't believe it...this [Old Earth profanity] universe can't just let me sit happily on the bridge of the Ironblood, sipping coffee and directing the fleet to bombard it with cannons and be done with it?!"

Mr. Ramizan Carlosini sat on a fallen tree trunk covered in thick moss, sighed heavily, and solemnly instructed: LOGOS must never turn off the power armor's built-in air conditioning here.

If I can go back, I must cook a whole table of delicious food for Peipei this time to thank him for insisting that I wear the power armor.

If you weren't wearing LOGOS and fell into this sticky, mosquito-infested rainforest—oh dear!

"Ugh! The air here is the air I hate the most! It's so hot and humid! The humidity level has exceeded the maximum range of the hygrometer!"

"But sir, isn't the maximum range of a hygrometer 100...?"

"Shut up, or next time I see those colorful, long snakes, I won't let you hide behind me."

"Oh."

"Ugh... how am I supposed to get back to this [Old Earth swear word]? Am I really supposed to start from scratch here, playing a jungle survival game and building my own spaceship? What kind of space Robinson Crusoe is this? At least give me a decent Friday, like a Belisarius Caul clone or something..."

In just one hour, the heretic leader, who had rapidly fallen from being described by Zao Eifelnetti as "a super powerful heretic leader who might even be a god" to "a really stupid and crazy person who is just a nice guy with a big build and some knowledge of the jungle," began to mutter and lament in a way that Zao Eifelnetti could not quite understand.

The boy shrugged, tugging at the small tube made of huge leaves hanging from his shoulder: a proper lower-class child wouldn't just sit here listening to his own monologue for an hour; he was already trying to find water, food, and things to keep his belongings dry.

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The notepad on the retina was open, listing some of Ramizam's latest notes:
Bad news: The strange bathroom mirror has landed Ramizane on a completely unfamiliar planet.

Good news: This planet at least has an atmosphere that humans can breathe, and even forests similar to tropical rainforests.

Bad news: LOGOS reports that due to some unknown adversarial influence, it is temporarily unable to report their location to the Ironblood and Peturabo BC, let alone send out a distress signal.

Good news: LOGOS reports that the power armor is in good condition, the reactor has sufficient energy, and although only four basic loads of mass ammunition were carried, the energy weapons can be recharged indefinitely, and the shields are intact.

Bad news: I brought a bunch of weapons but no food or water, and there's a human child with me. I have to protect the human child and find food and water.

Good news: Zão Eifelnetti, who went missing, has been found. He's alright, just terrified, and says he was brought here by his sister's ghost.

……

"Okay, if we think about it carefully, as long as we don't encounter any creatures with an intelligence level exceeding that of ordinary monkeys, we should be able to survive for at least a while..."

Zano had already started trying to find two dry flints to start a fire. Upon hearing this, he glanced at the giant beside him, who looked like he was in great shape, with a very strange look. Just as they landed, a giant, brightly colored, scaly python with bared teeth and claws shot out from a tree, its mouth wide open, aiming straight for Zano.

Clearly, the tender, mortal boy was like a super-sized pie falling from the sky to the giant python, definitely tastier than the canned food next to him.

Before the boy could say anything, the person in front of him suddenly screamed, "How terrifying! Holy crap, this thing is bigger than a pair of Zhoushan glasses! Holy crap, is it poisonous and a python? Holy crap, how can there be such a monstrous creature?! Don't come any closer! It's so scary! I'm dying of fright!"

...As a result, while saying he was afraid of the screams, he reached out and grabbed the head and tail of the giant python, which was as thick as a water basin. He tore it in two instantly and crushed its head and body to pieces. And then he said he could "live for a while." Isn't that a bit too modest?

Zan'ao doesn't really understand the adult world.

The soft tapping of stones pulled Lamizain's thoughts and gaze from the notebook on his retina back to reality.

"What are you doing?"

"Get a fire. We need to start a fire to dry our shoes and clothes." "Uh. I don't need one, but you want to light a fire?"

"Yes, sir, I think I should at least get some water to boil and drink, otherwise I'll get diarrhea, and diarrhea can be fatal."

The boy looked over, and his eyes no longer held the fear, apprehension, and dread he had initially felt towards Ramizan. Now, they were filled with the mature expression of a child who had cared for disabled family members for many years: helplessness, silence, and acceptance.

"...You're surprisingly quite common-sense." Ramizam sighed. Hey, cheer up, you have a child with you, this isn't the time to daydream.

“I can start a fire. Don’t worry. This isn’t a place to stay for long. We need a shelter where you can stay, somewhere near water, away from the forest, and, well, I think, preferably somewhere that’s also easy to defend.”

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After trekking for another hour through this sweltering forest full of saline swamps and mud, and finally finding a bitter saltwater stream, someone started muttering to himself again.

"...This is outrageous! The Amazon rainforest is supposed to be a green desert, so at least it has some fresh water! This place is all saltwater!"

"Perhaps we can wait for it to rain?"

Zaan, sitting in the net in front of his armor, suggested that, in order to resolve the conflict between Ramizane and Zaan's walking speed in the swamp, and to at least protect Zaan from danger from behind and above, they should spend some time weaving a simple net from vines and strips of cloth to hang on the shoulders of the power armor before setting off, so that the boy could sit inside and move quickly.

Also, this smooth vine always seemed to move on its own, but Zao wasn't sure, because after the person in front of him named Ramizann plucked it off, it looked like an ordinary vine.

“But I don’t know when it will rain.” Ramizan stood up straight on the black humus mud by the river and looked up. The sliver of sky was gradually tinged with orange-red, indicating that this place at least had a normal day-night rhythm.

"Honestly... the environment is actually quite nice, but why did we come here? Why me and you?"

“How would I know, sir?” The boy shook his head, then turned his head to the side. “Oh. Did you hear that?”

"What did you hear?" Ramizan had LOGOS turn on the oracles and start scanning, but found nothing.

“There were…voices of conversation. I’m not sure, but it was probably Low Gothic.”

LOGOS still reports that no living organisms were detected.

"...Are you hallucinating again?"

“I really heard it!” the boy insisted, gripping Ramizan’s arm guard tightly with one hand. “But I don’t know how to let you hear it too… uh, really, it sounded like something about a colonel… a sergeant…”

This gave Ramizann a jolt of energy. "The Imperial Army?"

However, at least there are people here! Let's find a human settlement in this godforsaken place first before we start solving other problems!
The boy frowned and listened intently.

Suddenly, a fragmented word abruptly slipped past Ramizan's ears, like a malfunctioning radio picking up a distant signal.

“...waterfalls...Colonel..."

"Uh?"

(End of this chapter)