Bronze door through time and space

Chapter 844 You are my God

He jumped onto the table, took a sip of the champagne tower, and Yan Xu gave him a disdainful slap. The broken glass interrupted the Joker's conversation with his beloved Batman, so he drew his pistol, revealed a harmonious smile, and prepared to teach the other a lesson in his next life.

“A cat.” The Joker licked his lips. He was crazy, not stupid, so he naturally wouldn’t think it was an ordinary cat. But he keenly sensed that his beloved Batman was nervous, which was a very, very rare occurrence. This immediately piqued the Joker’s interest. So, ignoring Batman’s clever ways of breaking free from his restraints, he staggered toward the cat picking and choosing on the table.

The Joker was right; Batman was indeed nervous because he still couldn't determine what the cat was—whether it was a cat with superpowers or some other creature with a cat-like appearance. Whatever it was, once it got involved with the Joker, even he couldn't predict what would happen.

"Not going to play that boring game of chase with your dear Batman anymore?" Yan Xu was fairly satisfied after licking the caviar, but the person in front of him was more interesting, so he looked up and said while stuffing caviar behind his butt.

"Compared to the increasingly boring Batman, a talking cat is obviously more interesting. Can you do a backflip?" The Joker asked curiously, fiddling with the small flower in his breast pocket, his mouth wide open in an exaggerated smile.

"What a boring human. Since you like Batman so much, why don't you marry him and have children? Isn't that what all humans do?" Yan Xu's words made the Joker laugh out loud, but they made Batman's heart skip a beat, because he knew that the other party could really do it!

"Relationships between men and women are so boring." Harley Quinn's twisted love for Batman made it difficult for the Joker to get enough interest from her, so he waved his hand dismissively and said, already planning to end the farce, because he had a second half of the game planned for his beloved Batman.

"It's simple, we can just compromise." Yan Xu picked up the last box of caviar and cast his ability on the Joker before leaving. Compared to Batman's battle of wits with the Joker, he was more interested in seeing the emotional entanglement between the super-powerful Batman and the Joker.

Gotham is bad enough, why add more fighting and killing? So Yan Xu plans to change the male-oriented drama to a female-oriented one and increase the romance. As for the action scenes, they can remain the same, but the location needs to be changed, for example, to a soft and elastic 1.8-meter by 2-meter venue to prevent injuries.

Look how thoughtful that is.

The Joker, now much shorter, pulled up his slipping trousers. Faced with the slender, delicate yet more graceful face and body, he seemed to have found a fun toy. He buried his head in Batman's arms, who had somehow managed to break free of his restraints, and gave him a blissful smile that sent chills down Batman's spine.

This reminded him of a tired office worker returning home with his briefcase, being embraced by his gentle wife who was wearing an apron and holding a soup spoon.

The first time, the Joker wasn't beaten up but was instead locked in the cell that Batman had specially prepared for him and her.

Seeing the familiar hair color and makeup, yet so completely different, Alfred, who had previously worried about the arrival of a young cat-eared boy, is now even more worried that the master will have no heir, because he knows all too well the inextricable karmic ties between the master and the Joker.

The Joker seemed to have found a more interesting way to get along with Batman. There was no signature maniacal laughter, no endless lies, and no games that gave Batman a headache. He was quiet and unassuming, with only that strange look in his eyes and that meaningful smile, which made Batman's glutes stiffen.

If this is a nightmare, then it has to be said that it is the worst nightmare Bruce has ever had, at least one of them.

Bruce is now considering using some of the Scarecrow's Fear Gas on himself to cleanse his increasingly twisted mind.

Alfred shared the same thoughts. Faced with the ambiguous Bastard, the cat-eared lady who would most likely become the mistress, the stubborn young master who refused to wear underwear despite being gender-swapped, and the drastically changed Harley Quinn, Alfred suddenly felt truly old. Meanwhile, in a hidden warehouse somewhere in Gotham, Harley Quinn was preparing bombs and hostages...???
Where's the clown? Where did such a big man like her go?!
Yan Xu, who has only been here a short time, is feeding Catwoman, adding a unique touch to Gotham.

The explosion of flavor on the taste buds from high-end caviar is an absolute delight; even Catwoman rarely gets to taste caviar of this quality.

As for where the caviar came from, Catwoman didn't ask; she didn't think the Cat God couldn't do such a small thing.

"This is so boring. Let's go recruit more followers and have some fun," Yan Xu said, swishing his tail at the catwoman who was now engrossed in jewelry after eating and drinking her fill.

"A believer, like me?" Catwoman's interest was piqued by the thought of Gotham being full of cat ears, especially Batman.

"Of course not, only special believers receive this treatment. Besides, I am not only the God of Cats, but also an evil god, so they offer sacrifices of flesh and blood to please me." Yan Xu said these terrifying words with his cute but silly face.

“However, humans are all greedy and cunning. To gain their genuine faith, you need to be tempted enough,” Yan Xu continued. Meanwhile, Catwoman was already considering whether to contact Batman immediately. There was an evil god here; he needed to come and deal with it.

“So fat and women’s menstrual periods can be used to replace flesh and blood sacrifices, and the purer the faith, the more precise the parts to be sacrificed, such as shaping the body as a side effect.” As soon as Yan Xu said this, the catwoman immediately changed her attitude.

What? Inform Batman, sorry, we're not familiar with each other.

"If faith is further strengthened, it can even redeem flesh and blood, such as allowing fat to accumulate in specific locations and shaping the body, or injecting blood into specific sponges, or even converting it into energy to keep people young. This is not difficult at all for an evil god," Yan Xu said proudly. The catwoman had already knelt down, her cat eyes wide open, her face full of worship, because this was the god she had always dreamed of!
Although Catwoman is much younger than Bruce, Western women age quickly, and issues like sagging skin and fat accumulation can be devastating for women.

Moreover, she's always out in the wind and rain, and doesn't drink hot water. Even Catwoman dreads those few days of the month, so even Batman can't touch a hair on her head!

Although Catwoman is a lone wolf, the Penguin has a wealth of connections. All he needs to do is host a few banquets at the Iceberg Restaurant and have the radiant and graceful Catwoman make an appearance, which will be enough to attract a lot of attention.

Rejecting men naturally attracts women, and conversations among women easily steer towards skincare. Catwoman only needs to reveal a little of her skincare secrets, and even if they scoff, it doesn't stop them from trying it on their orange cat plushies. Sure enough, the fat on their waist and arms is absorbed, and their skin becomes much firmer.

The group immediately went to the hospital for a comprehensive physical examination, and the results showed that they were very healthy and that the removed fat had no negative impact on their bodies.

Some people suspected that the orange cat doll was some kind of high technology or drug, so they destroyed the statue for testing and research. As a result, they were cursed. Not only did they grow cat whiskers, but they also had to squat on the cat litter box to go to the toilet. Otherwise, they couldn't release any even if they were bursting.

These people had no choice but to turn to Catwoman and Penguin for help, which brought them considerable benefits. Meanwhile, the cat goddess, symbolizing beauty and health, began to spread in Gotham. Batman was very alarmed by this, because he was also in trouble, and a big one at that.

(End of this chapter)