I am an emotional anchor, one sentence can break the defense of the whole network

Chapter 229: What can easily bring people down is not society, not the workplace, but the family of origin
Hang up the mic,
Raymond Lam said to the live studio:
“Brothers,

Why are children bullied?

The reason is because my parents are cowards!

Remember, if your child is bullied, you must stand up for him or her.

Just listen to me.

Don't listen to what the teachers say at school, children will make mistakes.

We need to give children a chance to grow on their own.

There are always two sides to everything, and your child must have problems too...

Although I was bullied, don’t I take any responsibility?

We can't put all the blame on others...

As a parent, you also need to reflect on this first...

Of course, as a school and as a class teacher, we will also criticize the child’s hope, and parents can understand and cooperate. . .

Is there something wrong with this?

At first glance,
It seems like there's really nothing wrong with him.

So after hearing this, many parents said, okay, let’s all work together.

Two days later you will find that your child has been beaten again.

why?
Because the other party was not punished!
This is just like domestic violence. If there is a first time, there will be a second time. If there is a second time, there will be a third time.

So you must let his class teacher, the parents of the child who bullies our child, and all the classmates know one thing: they are not allowed to bully my child.

How to do it?

The military advisor will teach you.

At this time, you should immediately notify the class teacher and tell the parent to come to the school to see me.

He’s not coming?
I will go to the Education Bureau and bring government leaders with me. I will report Yaoyaoling to the police and classify it as school bullying. Your child will be sentenced and sent to a juvenile detention center.

Just these few words,
There must be momentum.

Don't worry about whether the protection of minors law is illegal.

Just these few words, I tell you, everyone will get through it.

When he comes, you tell him directly,
We are prepared to resolve this issue through legal means.

You said that I was going to report the bullying of my child to the Education Bureau as an example of bullying in this school, and notify the media to fight against Yaoyaoling.

Parents, how do you think this problem should be solved?

I would like to hear your opinion now.

The other party will definitely say, "Oh, they are just kids, what's the big deal?"

Then at this time, you should tell him to face up to this matter.

Your child has broken the law.
And the country is now identifying role models in each school district,
If you think this matter is trivial, I will let the law tell you how serious the harm is.

I tell you, brothers, he must have been scared to death at that time.

Then you drag his parents and his children to the podium in front of the whole class and ask them to bend down and apologize.

Remember this.

Show your momentum.

The more you do this, the less likely they will mess with you.

Don't fucking say oh, people should be civilized, love, be more understanding, more tolerant, and give others more opportunities.

fart!
Good people are often bullied, good horses are often bullied,
If no one dares to stand up, your child will be bullied.

You are not worthy of being a parent.

At last,
I would like to say a few words about the perpetrators, bystanders, and the bullied.

First of all, to the abuser, I want to say that you use your own isolation to prove your sociability.

Your insulting words and waving fists cannot at all prove your justice or strength.

It just shows your stupidity and rudeness.

That's it.

The abuser may be able to reform, but the victim may always live in the past.

So you never deserve to be forgiven.

To those bystanders, I want to say that silence is not neutrality, silence is a choice you make.

I don't want to condemn you for not taking action.
But at least,
Please get to know someone face to face, not through rumors.

Don't be a cruel perpetrator, and don't be a cold-eyed bystander.

At last,
To the victims and you in front of the camera, I want to say that whether life is worth living or not, what you and I say doesn’t count.

But how can I survive this journey in the human world?
We have the final say!
A person’s life is not long, so we should go to this world to see the rosy clouds in the sky.

To walk down the street hand in hand with your loved one.

When you come to this world, you should smell the flowers in the fields and bring some candies for your children on the way home.

When you come to this world, you should listen to the tides and waves, and buy some clothes you like from the store on the corner.

The romance of the universe and the mountains and rivers, and the warmth of the world, are all worth your efforts.

A smile from a stranger,
A word of comfort from a friend,
A family dinner,
The fragrance of flowers in the morning, the sunset in the evening, the rolled-down car window, and the freshness that blows on your face.

Every moment here is worth our trip to this world.

Sometimes we think that throughout our lives, aren’t we living just for these moments?
Therefore,
May you pass through mountains and rivers,
I still think this world is worth it.”

. . . . .

On the barrage.

"When you come to this world, you must see the rosy clouds in the sky and smell the fragrance of flowers in the fields" "The mountains and rivers in this universe are romantic, and the world in this world is warm"

my God!

“It’s so poetic and healing!”

"His words are poems, his famous quotes are compiled into a book, and in a few years he will become an educator of this era."

"Really, I think the military advisor is a sincere and righteous Wenquxing who came to the world with a mission."

“Simple language, but it touches everyone’s heart.”

"Those who perpetrate violence and those who remain silent should watch and listen."

. . . . . .

okay,

It’s getting late.
The last microphone comes up.

Ding~
"Hello, military advisor."

Lin Feng was stunned.
It's a woman.

From the sound of his voice he seems to be quite old.

Lin Feng: "Hello, is this my sister or my aunt?"

"Haha, my child is about the same age as you, you can call me auntie."

Lin Feng was puzzled: "Auntie, do you have any emotional problems?"

Aunt: "It's not me, it's my child."

Raymond Lam: "Children's emotional problems?"

Auntie: "Yes, I do. I want to ask two questions."

Lin Feng: "Okay, tell me."

"The first problem is that my son has just graduated from graduate school and has found a job in Shanghai, but I don't want him to stay there. I want him to come back, but he won't listen."

Lin Feng didn't understand: "Why let him go back?"

"Because we are from the county, it is difficult for him to earn a salary and buy a house in Shanghai, so I have been asking him to come back, but he doesn't want to come back. In terms of communication between us, this is not very smooth."

Lin Feng shook his head: "Auntie, it's right for your son not to go back. He has graduated from graduate school. Do you want him to return to your small county?"

"In fact, our small county has been doing pretty well in recent years..."

stop!
Lin Feng interrupted, "Please stop interfering with your son. Just do square dance and play mahjong every day. Don't worry about your son's affairs."

? ?
The aunt looked confused.

Lin Feng: "Because you don't have the ability, and you don't have the level, the more you manage, the worse it gets."

Aunt: "But all my relatives around me gave me advice."

Lin Feng smiled: "Does any of your relatives have a high school diploma?
To put it harshly,

None of your relatives are aware of the situation. Don't talk to them about anything concerning your son.

Seriously, auntie,
I don't really want to have any communication with you.

why?
All the brothers in the room know it.

I have said more than once that you should not try to reason with your family of origin. Military advisors are not capable of changing the thinking of the previous generation. "

Auntie: "Actually... I'm willing to learn from you. I've been watching your live broadcasts for a few days."

Lin Feng was stunned, "Are you also my die-hard fan?"

"Correct!"

Lin Feng knocked on the blackboard: "In that case, Auntie, are you ready to be scolded?"

? ?
Lin Feng opened fire: "You said you were willing to learn from me, but you didn't understand it!

Parents like you,

To put it bluntly, it's the kind of parents who have a death instinct.
Your son has graduated from graduate school and is working in Shanghai. Whether he stays in Shanghai in the future is his choice.

Working in a first-tier city plays a vital role in a person's development.

The thinking of people in first-tier cities, the recognition of outstanding people around them, and the advanced concepts and working environment of large enterprises and multinational companies in first-tier cities.
Even if your child works for two years and finally decides not to work in a first-tier city,

When he returned to your county, he also became a leader there.

remember,

Your son has graduated from graduate school, and his knowledge and vision have long surpassed yours.

How can you, a rural woman, control him?
Why don't I like talking to you?

Because you are such a typical parent.

Just as the child was about to spread his wings and fly, you snapped his wings and tied them up.

Then I kept repeating in his ear, "You can't afford to buy a house, come back, what are you doing in Shanghai, come back?"
This is a typical example of severely restricting a child's potential and future.

If a son encounters a parent like you, he should break free and stay away from you.

Because the more he contacts you,
The more inferior he feels in a first-tier city, the more motivation he will lose in his development.

You said that as a parent, your children did not blame you for not being able to support them in life and work.
Instead, you are suppressing your children because they are not capable enough to survive in big cities.

In the end, you still have to say that it’s all for your own good and that you love me.

You are so irritating.”

. . . . .

On the barrage.

"The military advisor is so cruel, even the old man drew his sword (covering his face and laughing)."

"The military advisor doesn't care about age. As long as you dare to connect to the microphone, he will dare to scold you (dog head)."

Hahaha.

"I think what the military advisor said is right. The child is already a graduate student, and his cognition must be much better than his parents. I know very well that my cognition is not as good as my daughter's, so I fully support her no matter what choice she makes."

"I think this mother is just afraid that her child will become too powerful and go far away, so she won't take care of her or treat her like a king."

"Is it possible that the relative was just jealous? He deliberately asked him to clip his son's wings and nest together in the chicken coop. The silly mother still believed everything."

"Unless your relatives are all wealthy people or city-level leaders, and if they can provide you with a good platform, you can come back. If they are a group of poor relatives who have no money and no power, then they are not relatives, but enemies."

"Besides, it's really hard to get along in a small place. The social etiquette is too terrible. It's too tiring for ordinary people to get along."

. . . . .

Lin Feng: "That's all I have to say. If I say more, it will be even more unpleasant. I'm afraid Auntie can't stand it. Some people may think that the military advisor has a bad mouth or is disrespectful to the elders.

no way,
In my opinion, if you are wrong, I will definitely scold you.

If you can't accept it, you can just not connect, you can just not ask, right?

But I hope you think carefully. Do you want to hear flattery or the truth when you connect to this microphone today?
If you want to hear the truth,

That must have stung you.”

Auntie was silent for a while: "Let me ask the second question."

Lin Feng: "Please speak."

“My child, I found a job in Shanghai.

But after he graduated, he had a girlfriend.

This girlfriend is his classmate.
I am currently studying for my doctorate, and both of my parents are university professors.

My son has a girlfriend in college, but he never told me.

He likes this girl very much. Every month, my son goes to the university once, and then this girl goes to Shanghai from the university once.
But I noticed they were happening more and more frequently, and I became concerned.”

Lin Feng: "What are you worried about?"

"Because my child had his thesis defense last Friday, I think it would be a distraction for him to talk about his girlfriend.
You see, they went to Thailand last month, and after they came back, they went to various places together every Saturday and Sunday.
Although he told me that the little girl is very good at studying and will be among the top students in the university next year,
But I'm still a little worried.

So I went to Shanghai to find him, and it turned out that this little girl also wanted to go.

I told my child on Tuesday that mom was going to Shanghai on Wednesday and asked if he could come over. My son said yes.

As a result, on Thursday, he called me and said that his girlfriend was also going there for a day.

When she heard that I was going too, she broke down.

She told my son that he was a mama’s boy and started arguing with him.

After the quarrel, my son told me that he also felt very tired.
He took this opportunity to tell his girlfriend, let’s end it.”

stop stop stop!
Lin Feng frowned when he heard this.

Wave to stop!

"Auntie, I really can't listen any more. Just tell me what question you want to ask me."

Aunt: "I just want you to help me look at their problem."

Lin Feng: "What's the problem between them? I think you have the problem."

? ?
Raymond Lam: "I'm asking you a question. You must answer me truthfully. How is your relationship with your lover?"

"It's OK. It's not particularly good, but we can coexist peacefully."

Lin Feng rolled his eyes and said, “Whoever looks for your son will be damned unlucky.

I'm leaving this here.

Regardless of whether your future daughter-in-law is this girl or not, you will not have a good relationship with your daughter-in-law.

And your daughter-in-law must be your enemy because she took away your son.

What? He’s in a relationship and he didn’t tell me…

What? He is going to defend his thesis now, but this woman is still pestering him all day long...

What? They just went to Thailand, and now they have to go to different places every day. . .

Why do you think it's a waste of time and you have to fly to Hangzhou to guide your son?

Think about it yourself, are these things that a real mother would say?"

Uh. .

Lin Feng didn’t finish yet and continued to fire: “You interfere with your son in every detail, which only shows that your own intimate relationship is not good.

You just said something, let me live in peace with my husband.

What does peaceful coexistence mean?

To put it bluntly, you and your husband are no longer close.

You have a bad relationship with your husband.

That's why you put all your energy on your son.

You and your son have such a strong emotional symbiosis.

You are a typical parent who keeps a tight control on your son in the name of love.

I can guess with my toes that you must be a very strong mother.

Of course, you also have your own strengths.

It means sending your son to college and graduating with a master's degree.

But remember, your son will not be able to handle interpersonal relationship problems at work.
His ability to express himself must be very poor.

I tell you, you as a mother are very narrow-minded.

What the hell, my son's job is more important than finding a partner.
Is this something a normal mother would say?
Your son found a PhD, and her parents are both university professors.

In which normal family would the parents not be happy for their son?

When young people are in love, you go to my place and I go to your place, flying back and forth, and the relationship will get better and better.

What are you doing?

When you see young couples having a good relationship, you feel uncomfortable.

They even came to the microphone to ask me their questions. What questions did they have?

It's your problem, okay.

Your son broke up with the girl because he was too tired.

Do you think it was that girl who made your son tired?
It's you, sister!
You made your son so tired!!
From work problems at the beginning to my son's love problems now,

I find that many parents nowadays are particularly stupid. They just want their children to do things according to their own ideas.
As a result, the child will have trouble finding a job, getting married, or having children.

Quarreling and fighting all day long,

Finally repeat your life.

Maybe in the end even they themselves don’t know why.

This is because parents want to control their children and plan their lives.
In fact, it is a very irrational and unwise approach.

You do this just to solve your own sense of security problem.
If you don't feel safe from your husband, you hope to feel safe from your son.

In fact,

You shouldn't tie up your son's life.

She should live as a person different from others.

He should do things that interest him more, like people he likes, do things that are more meaningful, and things that can mobilize his passion. "

The woman was silent again.

. . . . . .

On the barrage.

"My breast ducts are unblocked because of your scolding."

“That’s so cool, hahaha.”

High emotional intelligence: emotional symbiosis.

Low emotional intelligence: You love your child.

"Really, I can't stop talking about my son. My son. I have a serious son-loving complex."

"This is a typical case of a woman who has a bad relationship with her husband and puts all her energy into her son."

"I'm very confused. He keeps saying he's worried. What is he worried about? (Confused)?"

"He is worried that his son will grow up and have a life other than his mother."

"I'm worried that my son has a girlfriend and doesn't love me anymore."

"Without my husband's love, I can only ask for it from my son (speechless)."

. . . . .

Lin Feng: "I must scold you to wake you up today, otherwise you will suffer in the future.

Let me tell you,

If you want your son to live a good life, you must withdraw from his core life.

Boys don't grow up like this.
Your son has no wildness or manliness.

To put it bluntly, your son hasn't been weaned yet.

Your son should be dumped and abandoned in every relationship, and he should encounter obstacles again and again in society, otherwise he will never grow up.

Finally, you should make sure you call your son no more than once a week, and then without any instructions.

Otherwise your son will be ruined!"

. . . . .

On the barrage.

"This girl is too good. She is a PhD and her parents are professors. What else can she worry about?"

"She doesn't care whether her daughter-in-law is good or not, nor does she care about her son's feelings. She only cares about herself."

That's right!
"She only cares about whether she can control her son. Once she can't control him, she will go crazy."

"Indeed, it has nothing to do with whether her daughter-in-law is excellent or not. She just wants to spend her whole life with her son."

too frightening.

"If it were my son, I'd be afraid he wouldn't be worthy of such a good girlfriend. Just be happy in secret."

"Really, if my son can find such an outstanding girlfriend in the future, I will worship my daughter-in-law."

"It's a blessing for the whole family that they can't even grasp such an outstanding girl."

. . . . .

The aunt was silent for a while and then said, "Actually, I have also realized my problem. I have been controlling myself and not calling my son recently.

I just want to ask, you just said that he can call me once a week, so on Thursday, the little girl went to Hangzhou, and my son has not called me since then.

On Friday, he had his regular thesis defense, but he didn't have time.

I want to know, for example, today is Monday, can I call him once a week like you said?
Or should I wait for my son to call me and then I will contact him.”

Lin Feng knocked on the blackboard: "So what I said for a long time was in vain? You didn't understand it at all?
As a mother, it seems that you have put all your energy into your son. This is so scary.

What the hell is this? I didn't fight on Thursday, wanted to fight on Friday but didn't dare, and held it in for another day on Saturday.
You remember the date so clearly, what do you want to do?

Young girls aren't as clingy as you when they're in love.

Since you are older, I will tell you again.
A boy must be spiritually separated from his mother.
Not being controlled by my mother mentally,

Only when a child goes out on his own can he become a real man."

. . . . .

On the barrage.

Xiao Wan: "This mother seems to have been heartbroken (covering her face and laughing)."

Yaoyao: "That's a very accurate summary. I didn't play on Thursday, and I didn't play on Friday. I held it in all day on Saturday. I'm counting the days (I give in)."

July: "It's clear that they've only been in love for a few days."

Little Cake: “I can’t agree more.”

Xinxin: "Even when we were in love, we didn't fight this often (picking nose)."

Tongtong’s mother: “It’s just a breakup.”

terrible!

Attached

[Military Advisor’s Comments: The most suffocating thing about your original family is not that your parents always suppress you.
But while they suffocate you, they also make you feel that they truly love you in their hearts.

at this time,
You will have a strong sense of guilt in your heart.

This feeling is like a wet cotton jacket.

Take off the cold,
It's colder if you put it on.

(End of this chapter)