Notes on Longevity

Chapter 112 Knowing it's impossible, I accept my fate and idly watch the clouds and rain fall outside the pavilion.

"Senior brother, what's this?"

Ping An came to She Li's side, staring at the gourd with some worry.

When he was on the mountain, his senior brother Yu Yan took him to visit the senior brothers who practiced alchemy and talismanic arts.

Their rooms and scripture pavilion contained many magical artifacts, and he had seen this gourd before. It was a magical artifact specifically used to capture demons and ghosts. If a demon or ghost was captured in the gourd, it would be corroded by the gourd's magical power within three days, then turn into a puddle of thick liquid, which would eventually be absorbed by the gourd and become part of its magical power.

Therefore, he was somewhat worried about Xiao Changgong, after all, judging from his tone and behavior just now, his relationship with She Li should be unusual.

"Don't worry, it's alright." She Li understood Ping An's worries. He patted Ping An's back and said, "I just put him in. I didn't use any hand seals or incantations to activate the magic power inside the gourd. Don't worry."

After She Li finished explaining, he suddenly felt that something was wrong. He thought about it and seemed to understand. So he asked Ping An, "Junior brother, you should know that there is a demon inside this fox, right? Why are you still worried about him?"

Ping An was taken aback upon hearing this, and he said awkwardly, "When we were on the mountain before, the ancestor told me that everything in the world has two sides, yin and yang. This applies to humans and demons alike. And judging from how you and he are playing around, it doesn't seem like you're trying to catch a demon."

She Li smiled and said, "Junior brother, don't think that way. Some things can be faked."

"Pretending?" Ping asked, puzzled. "Was Senior Brother faking it just now?"

"No, that's not it. I've known this guy for a long time, and I know his character well. As for you, the ancestor told me before that you're a simple-minded child with no ulterior motives, so you should be careful."

She Li was having a great time shaking the gourd in her hand, while reminding Ping An to be more careful in everything he did and not to be so silly.

Ping An wasn't stupid. He understood the meaning behind She Li's words, but he didn't know why, no matter what he did or who he met, he always chose to trust them. Perhaps it was because his master had been with him all along. He trusted his master, so he indirectly chose to trust others as well.

"Master?" Ping An suddenly remembered why he had come. He walked to Yang Shouren's side and asked with some sadness, "Young Master Yang, do you know where my master is buried?"

Yang Shouren was still reeling from the scene of She Li subduing Xiao Changgong. He was also unable to process Ping An's question. Mainly, he had only heard of the existence of demons and ghosts in this world before, and knew that Taoist priests could exorcise demons and capture ghosts, but seeing it with his own eyes still left him somewhat surprised and shocked.

"Young Master Yang?" Ping An called out again, and Yang Shouren finally came out of the scene he had just been looking at.

He looked at Ping An, still somewhat shaken, and asked, "What's wrong, Daoist Ping An? Is there another monster?"

"Uh." Ping An looked at Yang Shouren and didn't know how to start the conversation, wondering if what had just happened had frightened him.

Seeing this, She Li came to Yang Shouren's side and said to him, "My junior brother asked you where his master is buried."

When he returned to the mountain before, he heard Yu Yan, Master Qing Shui, and Ancestor Yu Yang mention that Ping An had another master. He had searched for him before but had not found any trace of him. It turned out that he had already been buried here.

"Oh," Yang Shouren immediately understood what She Li said. He pulled Ping An forward, bypassed several graves without tombstones, and finally stopped at a grave that was different from all the other earthen graves here.

This is a structure built of stone slabs, and even the tombstone is not made of wood, but rather of high-quality granite.

She Li used her mind to guide the ball of fire to the two of them, and the bright firelight illuminated the words on the tombstone. One side of the inscription read: Tomb of Qing Xuanzi, the Taoist of Supreme Goodness.

On the other side was written his life story:

His secular name was Zhang Jinggong. He initially pursued literature, failing the imperial examinations for three years. After several more years of diligent study, he finally passed with flying colors at the age of thirteen and rose to the position of Minister of Rites. However, due to the presence of treacherous and incompetent officials in the court, he angrily denounced them, thus securing a sliver of hope for a more transparent and efficient administration. Yet, his actions were like fire and water, unable to choose wisely, and he was later demoted to a county magistrate in Fuyun. Disgusted with officialdom, he devoted himself to studying Taoist scriptures, later resigning to cultivate in the mountains. He then traveled with a fellow Taoist, Qingshui. While passing through a place, he rescued a child, naming him Ping'an (meaning "Peace"), wishing him a peaceful life.
"Master!" He knelt before Qing Xuanzi's grave, his eyes blurry with tears as he looked at the words on the tombstone. All the images and memories of his master flooded his mind at that moment. He tried his best to hold back his tears, because his master had told him, "Child, don't cry."

But in the end, he couldn't hold back. All the thoughts and feelings he had for his master, combined with his experiences along the way, flooded his mind as tears and sobs.

Seeing this, She Li and Yang Shouren were at a loss for what to do. However, Xiao Changgong, who was inside the gourd in She Li's hand, frowned, then sat cross-legged and used magic to transmit his voice to She Li, saying, "You idiot, what else can you do besides catching demons! Let me out. If he keeps crying like this, how will you explain to the ancestor after he goes blind?"

Upon hearing this, She Li frowned and unhesitatingly opened the gourd. Seeing the opening, Xiao Changgong immediately turned and went outside.

He looked at the man crying in front of the tombstone and came to his side with a frown.

He crouched down and placed a hand emitting a pale yellow light on Ping An's head.

"Child, don't cry. Your master is always here." Xiao Changgong imitated Qing Xuanzi's deep, aged voice as he spoke to Ping An.

She Li and Yang Shouren, standing to the side, looked at him in confusion, wondering what Xiao Changgong was doing. But seeing that Ping An's crying was gradually subsiding, they didn't think much of it and just watched them quietly.

"Child, look, the rain is getting heavier."

In a low pavilion in a wide bamboo grove, Qing Xuanzi wore a tattered, faded Taoist robe, soaked by the rain and very uncomfortable to wear.

But he paid no attention to any of that. Instead, he looked at Xiao Ping'an, who was sitting on the long wooden bench in the pavilion, crying.

The rain was heavy outside, and the wind was blowing. The wind carried the rain into the pavilion. He opened his Taoist robe and stood sideways beside Xiao Ping'an. He pulled the robe up to cover Xiao Ping'an's back, afraid that the rain would fall on him.

He was hunched over, and amidst the sound of raindrops hitting the ground and the wind rustling through the bamboo leaves, a faint smile appeared on his aged face. He looked at Ping An and said softly, "Listen to this rain, don't you think it sounds beautiful?"

Ping An raised her tear-streaked face to look at Qing Xuanzi and cried, "But I lost my master."

“But child, look at this rain.” Qing Xuanzi smiled, patted his head, pointed to the rain falling wildly outside the pavilion, and continued to speak softly.

Xiao Ping'an looked in the direction Qing Xuanzi was pointing.

Perhaps due to the heavy rain, the world outside the pavilion appeared somewhat gloomy. A thin layer of mist rose on the distant horizon, slowly spreading towards them.

A thin mist drifted over the mountains and forests, gradually seeping into the bamboo grove. Raindrops from the eaves were falling rapidly to the ground.

"But what's wrong with the rain?" Xiao Ping'an asked, sobbing as she looked at the spreading mist and the raindrops falling from the sky.

Qing Xuanzi lowered his hand from the Taoist robe, and the robe then clung to his body.

He pulled Xiao Ping'an to the middle of the pavilion, then pointed to the mist in the distance and laughed, "Look, this rain is falling from the sky, but do you know where in the sky it's falling from?"

Tears welled up in Xiao Ping'an's eyes. He looked at Qing Xuanzi and shook his head, indicating that he didn't know.

Qing Xuanzi continued to smile, releasing Xiao Ping'an's hand and speaking with great emotion, using both hands and feet: "This rain comes from the clouds and mist in the sky. It has followed them since it was little, going wherever they go. But the rain in the clouds and mist will also grow up one day, just like I holding your hand, sooner or later I will let go." "But how does the rain meet the clouds and mist? They are clearly in the sky, and rain is water, so how does water go to the sky?" Xiao Ping'an asked curiously, wiping away her tears, her delicate and pretty face showing.

"Do you see this fog?"

Qing Xuanzi pointed to the clouds that were getting closer and closer to them, and Ping An said, "I can see it."

“It’s just like how I feel about you.” The mist finally seeped into the pavilion, but the thin fog did not obstruct their vision. Qing Xuanzi looked at Xiao Ping’an and continued, “Actually, I can’t let you go either, but one day you will grow up, just like the rain in this mist.”

"In this life, all we experience is separation and death. When the time comes, it won't be that I can't keep you, but that I can't keep you anymore. You'll grow up, and I'll grow old. Besides, I'm already old now, and you can't keep me anymore. How can you say you've lost me?"

"But Master... wasn't he a god? How could he... die?" Xiao Ping'an stared at Qing Xuanzi with teary eyes, unable to believe it.

"Immortals. Immortals." The rain subsided, and the thin mist began to thicken, almost obscuring their vision. "My entire life, aside from serving as an official, has been spent searching for immortals. I have traversed countless mountains and rivers, witnessed the warmth and coldness of human relationships, understood the gentleness of love, and comprehended the unshakeable nature of mountains. I knew that seeking immortality was impossible. Yet, the path was right beneath my feet, and I still wanted to try, until I met you."

“You are like this pavilion in the bamboo forest, in the rain, and in the mist. Although I have a heart that seeks immortality, after I saved you from others, you have become more important to me than immortals. So in the end, I chose to take you with me on this journey.”

"Was it wrong of me to go down the mountain? Did I let my master down?" Xiao Ping'an asked, tears welling up in her eyes, as she looked at Qing Xuanzi, who was gradually being enveloped by the thick fog. She sobbed and choked out the question.

“Child,” Qing Xuanzi stretched out his hand from the thick fog, touched Xiao Ping’an and smiled, “Just keep moving forward.”

"Go forward?" Xiao Ping'an asked, his voice choked with emotion, as he couldn't see his master.

"Yes, keep moving forward," Qing Xuanzi's voice gradually faded.

Xiao Ping'an felt the hand on his head lighten, so he reached out and grabbed Qing Xuanzi's hand.

However, he failed to catch it and passed right through it.

"Master!" he roared, kneeling before the tombstone, his heart-wrenching cries echoing through the bamboo forest at night.

She Li looked at Ping An with concern, and was about to ask Xiao Changgong a question when he raised a finger to his lips.

Tears welled up in Xiao Changgong's eyes as well. He glanced at She Li, then turned his gaze back to Ping An.

"Keep moving forward," he continued softly, his voice slightly hoarse, using the voice of Qing Xuanzi in Ping An's mind.

The thick fog completely enveloped Xiao Ping'an, but it left him with a white, misty world.

He cried, listened to his master's voice with his head down, and walked forward.

"Master, which way should I go?" he asked, sobbing.

"Keep moving forward," Qing Xuanzi said softly.

"But it's all white here, I can't tell which way is which, I don't know where I'll end up." He sobbed, choked up, and walked slowly forward with his head down.

There was no response this time. In the vast white world, only Xiao Ping'an, head bowed, cried alone.

"Master."

Xiao Ping'an bit her lip and sobbed as she called out to him.

But he still didn't respond.

"Master." Xiao Ping'an walked with his head down, calling out many times, waiting for his response.
There was no response, only the choked sobs of crying.

Finally, he stopped.

He clenched his small fists, bit his lip, and sobbed. He called out again, "Master."

"Child," he finally replied, "Go boldly forward! I'll always be behind you, I won't leave."

Ping An burst into tears again, crying loudly, "Master...Master..."

In the world of white mist, Xiao Ping'an's cries echoed, and he took another step forward.

Xiao Changgong frowned and stood quietly behind him, watching his retreating figure with tearful eyes.

He watched Xiao Ping'an walk forward, and slowly followed.

His mind was filled with a myriad of thoughts.

He had lived for over five hundred years, and could, and was qualified, say that he had seen all the wonders of the world. Yet, as he watched Xiao Ping'an's retreating figure, he too burst into tears.

Using his secret method, he watched Ping An's past unfold bit by bit in his mind. He never imagined that such a young child as Ping An had experienced so much.

He followed slowly behind Xiao Ping'an, then suddenly stopped.

He stared in disbelief at the scene before him, muttering, "How could this be? My secret technique isn't limited to..."

He stopped in his tracks and stared blankly at Ping An.

"Master." Xiao Ping'an turned around, tears welling in his eyes, and ran towards Qing Xuanzi. He hugged Qing Xuanzi tightly around the waist, sobbing, "Let's not go searching for immortals anymore, okay? Let's go back to the mountains, build ourselves a small hut, and cultivate in there, okay?"

Qing Xuanzi smiled faintly, squatted down and patted Xiao Ping'an's head: "Alright. Then let's go back to the mountains."

"Okay!" Xiao Ping'an stopped crying. Although there were tears in his eyes, the smile on his face was like the warm sun melting the soft snowflakes in early spring.

Xiao Changgong stood sadly behind the two, watching Qing Xuanzi lead Xiao Ping'an away, chatting and laughing, into the white mist world. Only when the white mist rolled in again, obscuring his vision and concealing the figures of the master and disciple, did he finally step out.

(End of this chapter)