The Last 299 Days of Humanity

Chapter 18 The Perfect Hospital

Yu Qing couldn't help but fall into her emotional trap, and took her hand, saying:

“也不是吗，瞧你这人见人爱的模样，谁敢不关心你，我揍他。你说，谁敢不关心我们的褒姒？”

Bao Si tapped Yu Qing's forehead with one finger and said, "It's...this person!"

The way she said "this person" instantly broke down Yu Qing's emotional gates. He pulled Bao Si over, hugged her from behind, and said, "He's gone too far! I'll beat him to death!"

Bao Si smiled; her second attack had succeeded, and she immediately turned to kiss him.

At this moment, Yu Qing suddenly regained his senses. Wasn't this the humanoid girl who wanted to sign something with him?
Yao Dan and Da Ji were already enough to keep him busy; if Bao Si were to join them, he might have to drink ten pots of wine.

So, Yu Qing took the opportunity to turn Bao Si's head onto his shoulder, preventing her from kissing him.

Afraid of upsetting her, Yu Qing kept stroking her hair and said:
"Not a single person has come to the hospital for decades, which definitely shows how much we've neglected you precious babies..."

When Bao Si heard Yu Qing mention the hospital, she immediately became happy.

The opportunity has arrived; selling the hospital is her ultimate goal! Dating him is just a means to keep him here.

So he seized the opportunity to continue the conversation, saying:

"That's not quite right. This hospital was very prosperous decades ago. Back then, two-thirds of the houses in Wengshan were occupied by people waiting to be admitted to the hospital!"

"What a joke! Has Wengshan been hit by a plague?"

"It's no joke. These were people who came from all over the world seeking medical treatment. At that time, it was really difficult to get a bed in the hospital."

"What special skills does this hospital have?"

"A unique skill? It's not that simple. It's a skill that everyone is eager to learn and everyone longs to master."

"Oh? That's so exaggerated! Stop keeping me in suspense, what is it?"

"I ask you, what is humanity's greatest desire?"

"Of course, it's health and happiness!"

"They had all of that. Back then, a man would have several humanoid maidens to serve him food, clothing, sleep, and entertainment. They would even carry him or hold him while he walked. Weren't they happy?"

"That's true. In this situation, of course, the greatest wish is to stay healthy and live forever!"

"That's why our hospital caused a global sensation back then because we found the secret to immortality!"

"Does it really grant immortality?"

"After treatment at our hospital, most people will live 50 to 60 years longer. It's true, I'm not kidding you."

"Why did the place become deserted after that, with no one coming to patronize it anymore?"

"Because Mr. Lu, who was researching immortality, passed away, and his son Dr. Lu also left, there is no one to make medicine for us anymore."

"Wait a minute, Mr. Lu, Dr. Lu's father, died around the age of sixty."

Why couldn't he make himself immortal? At that time, the average lifespan seemed to be around 120 years.

Isn't that a bit ironic?

"That's the problem. The elixir of immortality works for most people, but it may not work for a few people due to other issues."

But with Old Master Lu gone, there was no one left who could understand these things.

Shengtian Company's competitor, Shengdi Company, seized the opportunity to create a media frenzy, claiming that we were a fraud.

Customers worldwide who experienced no results also filed huge claims, and so…”

"So no one came anymore. But I don't really believe in the elixir of immortality."

"Yes. You know, aging is caused by the continuous loss of terminal particles during cell division."

Grandpa Lu invented a virus pill that can carry the original length of human cells' end particles to engulf the shortened end particles, perfectly completing the replacement.

The virus, which acts as a carrier, can be eliminated by taking a few more pills. Of course, it also has limitations; it can only prolong cell lifespan, not cure the disease.

Furthermore, different cells require different pills, and the formulation must be tailored to each individual, making the cost unsatisfactory.

"If that's the case, then the medicine does have some effect, so it shouldn't be considered a scam, right?"

"The Shengdi Company rose too quickly and became too powerful. Moreover, they have a trump card: they can make some human organs immortal without taking medicine."

"Is there such a thing?"

"Yes. For example, their artificial lungs can completely replace human lungs, and there will be no discomfort after the replacement, with a lifespan of up to 480 years."

So people started replacing their lungs, even if their original lungs were perfectly healthy. Later, the Shengdi Company went on to invent artificial hearts, artificial stomachs, artificial livers…

"If they were all replaced like this, they'd be made of iron, practically immortal!"

"But our Shengtian Company has also successfully researched several organs, which they can't even dream of!"

"What organ?"

"Nose, ears, eyes, 100% replacement. Our hospital can perform this surgery now, and all hospitals invested in by Shengtian can undertake these services."

Yu Qing said, half-jokingly, "Oh, really? My nose is always running snot. Why don't you take some time to replace it with Sheng Tian's nose?"

Bao Si laughed and said, "Anyone who doesn't change is a puppy!"

After saying that, she gestured for Yu Qing to give her a high five as a pledge. Yu Qing took it as a joke and gave her a high five.

Bao Si then resumed her sales pitch. She suddenly nestled close to Yu Qing's face and said:

"Actually, our hospital still has a bright future. As long as we continue to expand our business, we will definitely be able to restore our former prosperity."

Why don't you buy it? It's such a great investment!

Yu Qing pushed Bao Si away and laughed, "There's no one here anymore. I bought this for my own use."
If you're going to invest, go where there are lots of people. Don't take me for a fool, you little rascal!

"You can't say that. As long as you have a unique trick, customers from all over the world will still flock to you!"

"But I don't even have a move, so how could I have a secret technique?"

So Bao Si started playing the emotional value card again. She whispered mysteriously:

Do you know how many beautiful humanoid women we have here? There are 347 in total!
If you buy this hospital, you can at least have them all provide 24-hour service just for you.

Don't you think this is incredibly pleasing to the eye?

What could be more worthwhile than buying a king for a pittance!

Yu Qing laughed and said, "I might as well open my own factory that produces humanoid beauties!"

This stuff is like sugar; adding two spoonfuls to water makes it sweet, but adding two bowls would be unbearably cloying!

Bao Si was speechless; it seemed her sales pitch had failed again. So, she immediately switched to her second plan: to persuade Yu Qing to significantly increase the number of items available for purchase.

She smiled and said, "I don't think so. It's all about how you do it."

However, since you're not interested in this, just pretend I didn't say anything.

Then she brought her lips close to Yu Qing's ear, gently breathed warm air, and said:
"This, that, seven, eight, four, six, three, one... Did you hear what I said clearly?"

Yu Qing laughed and said, "I didn't hear you clearly. What does 'seven' and 'eight' mean?"

"It seems your hearing isn't very good either; you can't hear many sounds completely."

Yu Qing asked, puzzled, "My ears are perfectly fine, what do you mean by not being able to hear many sounds completely?"

Bao Si's lips trembled as if she were saying something, but Yu Qing really didn't hear anything.

"Well, did you hear that?"

Yu Qing said, "I didn't hear it. If you were emitting ultrasonic waves, I'm not a bat, so naturally I wouldn't be able to hear it."

"This indicates that your hearing ability is still significantly limited. We now have technology that can expand your hearing range ninefold..."

Yu Qing said, "Nine times, that's really impressive. Looks like I need to get a pair of better-sounding ears?"

Bao Si tugged at his ear and said, "Then it's settled! This ear should have been upgraded a long time ago."

"It's a deal! I'll be watching everything from all angles, it'll be awesome!"

"You've been thinking about being able to see in all directions, haven't you? How about something with eyes, ears, and nose all around? We have a kind here that can spot male and female mosquitoes a hundred kilometers away..."

"Okay, okay, no problem at all. I'd also like to get my mouth done, so my speech has a natural soy sauce flavor..."

"Honey, we can't do the mouth. We have to take it one step at a time. Let's get the eyes, ears, and nose sorted first, and then we can talk about the rest."

"Please wait a moment, I'll go prepare and be right back."

Yu Qing asked with a smile, "What are you preparing?"

Bao Si smiled but did not answer, made a mischievous face, and left like a gust of wind.

Looking at that graceful figure from behind, Yu Qing felt a surge of attraction again.

However, he then thought that thousands upon thousands of such humanoid beauties could come off the assembly line.

I can't make trouble for myself anymore. I should leave as soon as Yao Dan arrives.

If he hadn't arranged to meet Yao Dan at the hospital, he almost ran away yesterday.

These humanoid beauties in the hospital were so eye-catching, like a giant net that made it hard for him to breathe.

Yesterday, the humanoid food delivery girl accidentally spilled some water on his hand, and she actually knelt down and wiped it clean with her face. He's under a lot of pressure; what's she trying to do?

He prefers a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere to a gloomy sense of ritual or an inexplicable hierarchy of status.

At this moment, four nurses entered and humbly said to him, "Bao Si asked us to invite you to her place now."

After saying this, they gently pushed the bed and walked towards the door. Daji and the others, who were standing outside, followed behind.

"My dear, where are we going?" Daji asked.

“They said they were going to the doctor,” Yu Qing replied.

A moment later, Yu Qing was pushed into a large house. Bao Si walked over with a smile, touched his forehead, and said, "You're in good shape. Can you send your followers out?"

"Daji, you all go ahead. You'd better check at the door to see if Yaodan has arrived yet!"

After Daji and the others left, a nurse pushed the bed out as well, then closed the door. Yu Qing heard a click, indicating the door had been locked.

Yu Qing suddenly sensed something was off about the atmosphere and asked, "What are you up to, Bao Si? This isn't how you check up a body in the past."

Bao Si smiled and said, "Don't be impatient, it'll be over in a bit. Changing the nose will take about thirty minutes, the ears forty minutes, and the eyes will take a little longer, about an hour, mainly because the nervous system is complex..."

Yu Qing jumped out of bed in a panic and shouted, "Bao Si, are you serious? I was just joking!"

Bao Si said innocently, "Who's joking? I'm serious, and I've already placed the order."

Look, the packaging for the eyes, ears, and nose has already been opened! Have you ever seen something that's been opened and can still be returned?

"Okay, okay, I'll pay for these three things, but the surgery won't be necessary."

Bao Si stood there and did some calculations. Although this would not affect the hospital's revenue and might even save money, it would face serious legal problems and could lead to lawsuits for charging fees under false pretenses.

Therefore, she was certain that the surgery had to be performed, and even tried to hug Yu Qing to persuade him to cooperate.

Yu Qing tried to run away to avoid Bao Si's embrace, but he lacked the agility of a beautiful woman, and Bao Si pulled him into her arms from behind.

Bao Si whispered in his ear, "Sweetheart, don't make things difficult for me. The surgery isn't finished, so this door can't be opened..."

Yu Qing pleaded, "I'll compensate you three times over, okay? My dearest, most kind and lovely Bao Si, please don't have the surgery, okay?"

Bao Si looked conflicted and muttered to herself, "This... doesn't make sense... Why would you rather pay three times the money than get a better organ? Something's wrong..."

Yu Qing turned Bao Si around to face him, grabbed her arms tightly, and said, "That makes sense, because we have preserved our original way of life for generations. We can't let it be lost here with me, do you understand?"

Bao Si continued to mutter to herself, "What a wonderful artificial nose! It can eliminate all viruses and bacteria in the universe that attempt to infect humans through the air..."

Clearly, her thinking had stalled.

At that moment, he noticed the nurse drawing some medicine into a syringe, and that's when he truly panicked.

He couldn't even handle one humanoid maiden by himself, and there are five humanoid maidens here. If he doesn't reverse their logic, he's doomed today.

Suddenly, an idea struck him, and he said, "Okay, we'll start the replacement surgery later. But I need to poop now! I really can't hold it in."

Bao Si woke up from her coma and said, "Nurse, go and help him defecate!"

At that moment, a nurse opened a hidden door, revealing another room inside.

She went inside and patted the wall, and an invisible, movable toilet emerged like a giant hand.

Two nurses lifted Yu Qing's legs, one on each side, and carried him inside, placing him on the toilet seat. Then they began to pull down his pants.

Yu Qing grabbed their hands and hurriedly said, "I can't poop here, I need to go to the restroom..."

Bao Si came over to comfort her, saying, "I know most humans don't like defecating in public, but we really can't get out until the surgery is complete. Listen to me, honey, listen to me."

Although Bao Si's hands were small, they were surprisingly strong. She easily pulled Yu Qing's hands away and tore down his trousers.

Yu Qing hurriedly covered his exposed parts with his shirt and said, "Turn your faces away, don't look!"

Yu Qing sat on the toilet, quickly thinking of ways to prolong the time.

(End of this chapter)