Who would study psychology if they didn't have some kind of problem?

Chapter 99 Family and Responsibility

Should we draw a little more?
As he said this, Li Minglu shrank back.

Nan Zhuren's eyes narrowed.

At the same time, a word flashed through my mind—[feeling unworthy].

Feelings of unworthiness are a very important symptom of depression. When people with depression receive care from others, they feel that they are not worthy of that care and feel guilty, which further aggravates their condition.

It's often said that you shouldn't show undue concern for people with depression, and this is an important reason why.

Due to this feeling of unworthiness, most people will have one of the following two reactions:

First, establish a very strong defense system and refuse any help from others.

Second, excessive giving to others, causing one's own losses to exceed what one receives from them, thereby alleviating one's anxiety about receiving help from others.

But at this moment, Li Minglu's sense of "unworthiness" was a bit too strong.

Faced with Nan Zhuren's consultation, Li Minglu was overly cooperative, even taking the initiative to extend the consultation in various ways.

He seemed to think that Nan Zhuren's consultation was a kind of "help" that he did not deserve.

While feelings of unworthiness typically lead to two types of reactions, those with depression usually only resort to defensiveness because their own energy is insufficient to support developing a tendency to "over-give for others" from scratch.

So... Li Minglu's feeling of unworthiness existed before he became ill?

[Could this even be one of the causes of his illness?]

The counselor seemed to have gotten close to something.

Nan Zhuren was already adept at multitasking. He mentally recorded and analyzed Li Minglu's reactions while continuing the "House-Tree-Person Drawing Test" on Li Minglu.

“No, there’s no need to add anything. This painting is perfect as it is,” Nan Zhuren said with a smile.

Nan Zhuren then slightly adjusted the angle of the painting.

When Li Minglu finished drawing the house-tree-person diagram, he pulled the drawing slightly so that it faced Nan Zhuren directly.

Now Nan Zhuren has adjusted the angle back, allowing Li Minglu to directly face everything depicted in the painting.

The other person has already materialized their subconscious; now they need to confront it.

“What is this house?” Nan Zhuren pointed to the painting in the center.

"Home." Li Minglu's answer was concise and clear.

What's in your home?

Li Minglu pursed his lips and pointed to the large house, which had its doors and windows tightly closed and was lifeless:
"My son, my daughter, and my wife."

Nan Zhuren expressed his understanding, then pointed to the small tree on the right: "What about this tree? Does it have a variety?"

"……No."

"That's a completely virtual work. I see it has beautiful bark and sturdy roots, but what other features does it have? Like, does it flower and bear fruit?"

Li Minglu thought for a while, taking a long time.

The consultation lasted for almost fifty minutes, and such a long exchange and thinking seemed to be a very energy-consuming thing for him.

"Actually, I didn't deliberately design the bark and roots when I painted it... so as to say it didn't flower and bear fruit, it probably didn't."

Nan Zhuren nodded in understanding, and his suspicions began to be confirmed.

……

Choosing the House-Tree-Person test for a painter actually involved some additional variables. This was because Nan Zhuren didn't know if Li Minglu might have any strange muscle memory in his drawing, such as habitually drawing things in an exceptionally vibrant way.

Such professional habits are likely to interfere with the results.

But now that Li Minglu is in a state of extreme aversion to painting, and the things he paints are all purely subconscious reactions without any sense of design.

Li Minglu's identity as a painter is actually an advantage, because his paintings are more direct in their expression.

Now let's analyze this tree again—in the House-Tree-Person drawing, the "tree" represents vitality; at the same time, the "bark" reflects "psychological sensitivity" to some extent, while the "roots" point to "past traumas".

This method of judgment is not absolute, but it can provide direction for Nan Zhuren's speculations and subsequent consultations.

Similarly, "house" also serves this purpose.

……

Nan Zhuren finally pointed to the stick figure.

"What was his creative intention in creating this little figure?"

“This is me, he’s about to go to work,” Li Minglu said.

"It's you?"

“Yes,” Li Minglu said, “This is a painting I drew, and there’s a little person on it…it seems like it can only be me.”

Looking at the monotonous and comically small figure, Li Minglu felt a sense of helplessness.

"So what are you doing in the painting?"

"Work, or rather... on my way to work."

"I remember you're a painter? Do you have your own studio outside?"

"No... my studio is at home. My wife set up a studio for me."

"It seems she really supports your work."

Nan Zhuren paused, then, using the information gathered earlier, raised the first aggressive question the consultation had posed so far:

"But if that's the case—why do you leave home when you're working?"

The conversation abruptly stopped.

Nan Zhuren could see Li Minglu's shoulder blades starting to engage, forcefully tightening towards the center. This movement was intended to maximize the surface area of ​​the back to protect the chest and abdomen.

In other words, it is an extremely strong defense.

[And the key to the emergence of this defense is—"wife"?]

For patients with depressive symptoms, Nan Zhuren didn't want to push them too hard.

Especially since this is only the first consultation.

Since Li Minglu has already provoked the defense, we should stop here with the existing information and proceed with verification and deployment later.

Nan Zhuren pretended to be flipping through the documents in his hand and began to give a concluding summary.

"I reviewed the counselor's summary of your previous consultations and found that your stress mainly stems from your work. Even though you are currently fighting against your negative emotions, and even though one of the sources of your negative emotions is work, you are still drawing, right?"

"Yes... because I have to support my family."

“So you are a very family-oriented person, and I admire that.” Nan Zhuren added a touch of self-expression to her positive observation.

"If I have my own family in the future, I hope that I will have the same sense of responsibility as you."

Li Minglu shrank his shoulders again, showing his strong defensiveness and discomfort towards the praise.

But after that brief moment of retraction, his shoulders quickly relaxed.

Yes, it has received support.

"Today is our first trial consultation, and it's a two-way selection process. I have a thorough understanding of your situation, and a specific intervention plan still needs to be developed. If you choose our consultation center in the future, we can communicate in advance before the next consultation."

"Also, I see that your family member—I think it's your wife—came with you. May I have a brief chat with her later?"

Li Minglu nodded: "Sure. In fact, my wife decides which consultant I choose."

(End of this chapter)