Immortal Dao Fruits, Cards to Help Me

Chapter 36 A Match Made in Heaven~
When Chen Xiuxian saw the snake spirit, he was also taken aback!
Huh? You guys modeled the snake spirit after that female celebrity from the old days?

The designer has great taste!
She is truly a peerless beauty, the most stunning demon in the demon realm!
The snake spirit twisted her waist, and her golden scales trailed on the ground, like a cascading river of stars enveloping her demonic body.

Her long black hair was coiled like a snake, adorned with gold and jade hairpins that could bewitch the soul, and her phoenix eyes held spring water, their sparkling gaze captivating all who beheld her!

The left side can bewitch a thousand-year-old ginseng spirit so much that it severs its roots; the right side can frighten a patrolling yaksha into kneeling and submitting!
With a delicate touch of her red nail polish, even the centipede leader hiding in the rock crevice would melt away half of his armor!
Her lips parted, releasing a fragrance as sweet as orchids; a careful sniff revealed...
It clearly carries the honey of a hundred flowers—but also the poison of arsenic!
The main reason is that Chen Xiuxian had collected some cultural and entertainment magazines from a hundred years ago. Among them was a female celebrity surnamed Fan who was known as the "internet celebrity plastic surgery template". She actually looked 80% like this snake demon!
I have to say, designers, you guys really know how to have fun!
So nostalgic?!
……

When Chen Xiuxian saw the snake spirit, he was amazed by the designer's extensive knowledge.

When the snake spirit saw Chen Xiuxian, she was alluring with her eyes and a smile as beautiful as a flower; she was so beautiful that she couldn't tell which way was which.

The snake spirit gently swayed the tip of her golden, shimmering tail, feeling utterly delighted: In this desolate, impoverished place, surrounded by barren mountains and desolate waters, how could there be such a handsome young man… He truly, truly melted my heart!
Even if it meant being suppressed for nine hundred years, it was all worth it.
She swayed her hips as she walked over, and with a slight touch of her slender fingers, she loosened the rope on Chen Xiuxian's chest.

She laughed before even speaking: "Hehehehehe~"

"Young master~ We have no grudges or hatred towards each other, so I invited you here today~" A strained voice!
The lesser demons and the demon leader nearly dropped their weapons—this wasn't what the king said! What are they doing here?!

How could Chen Xiuxian be a lecherous man?

Even with this beautiful snake spirit right in front of him, he remained unmoved and immediately interrupted her, saying, "Is this how you invite people?"

As a result, the snake spirit was not angry at all when she was scolded. Instead, she gently squatted down and curtsied with her hands at her waist.

That slight crouching motion was like a snow-capped mountain trembling, making one's heart tremble.

Chen Xiuxian's perception attribute had already reached 28 points, and he vaguely sensed something strange: Where was that sweet, fishy smell coming from? Hmm~ It's a bit intoxicating~
Then the snake spirit said in a coquettish voice, "It was I who was rude to you, young man~ It's better to resolve conflicts than to make them fester. Why don't we become in-laws and become friends~"

Chen Xiu quickly snapped his eyes and mind back to reality, thinking to himself: Oh no! This vixen is really after me!

Suddenly, he realized a blind spot: wait, where is the scorpion demon?
The Scorpion King watched as the snake spirit tested the veteran cadre.
Isn't he afraid of turning into a green-headed scorpion?!

"Your Majesty!" The toad leader with purplish-black patterns drew out the sound, bowed deeply, and presented something with both hands, "This is from this little white... cough! young master!"

"You bastard! How many times have I told you to call me Your Majesty!" The snake spirit suddenly adopted a mature and sophisticated demeanor, and even her voice changed!

She went from a sweet, delicate voice to a mature, sophisticated one!

I never expected she was such a tightwad!

However, she seemed to realize that she had given herself away, and immediately changed to a charming expression, saying in a coquettish voice, "You toad, how dare you call me 'young master'?"

As he spoke, he took the scorpion tail hook from the purple-skinned toad leader, casually waved his Ruyi, and a giant toad as thick as a water vat flew out with a "whoosh".

"Oh, hehehe~ Don't mind it, young man~"

Chen Xiuxian looked at the rocks on the cave ceiling, pretending not to have seen what had just happened: "It's just that I can't beat you..."

The snake spirit thought Chen Xiuxian was complaining about the dim lighting, so she slightly waved the Ruyi in her hand, and the room was instantly filled with light and brilliance.

Chen Xiuxian was getting a little greedy: This is a real treasure!
The snake spirit looked at the [Scorpion Tail Hook (Blue)] in her hand and suddenly smiled: "What a coincidence! I also have one of these treasures, young man!"

As he spoke, he pulled something out of a palm-sized sachet at his waist!
It was pitch black, yet occasionally flashed with a cold light. Apart from being two sizes larger than Chen Xiuxian's scorpion tail hook and having a different color, it was practically identical!

"Huh?" Chen Xiuxian was taken aback—can magical artifacts even have the same design?

Designers, you guys are so lazy!
You've only modeled female celebrities so much! Would it kill you to make a few more magical artifact models?

Why does this scene look so familiar?

Snake Demon: Brother, do you have a scorpion tail?

……

Chen Xiuxian has not yet found out any information about this snake demon, only that it must be level 35 or higher, which is far superior to his own level.

He stopped trying – he had already tried exiting the instance.

It's useless! You can only quit when you die.

He wasn't afraid of dying, since it wasn't real anyway. But he was afraid of something else, something unspeakable, might happen!
So he decided to deliberately provoke the snake demon and make her kill him: "Heh, how did my scorpion hook end up with you?"

He pointed to the large scorpion tail hook in the snake demon's hand. The snake demon smiled and fiddled with the tip of its tail, showing no interest whatsoever. It explained, "I made this myself. Look, you can even see my mark here!"

Chen Xiuxian raised his chin: "Why did you carve your mark on my scorpion stinger?"

"Ah? Oh, hahahahaha~" The snake spirit couldn't help but let out a mature, womanly laugh.

She grabbed Chen Xiuxian's shoulder in a very domineering way and pulled him to her chest: "Young master, you're so interesting, so domineering, I like it!"

Chen Xiuxian felt that this snake demon probably had over 40 arm strength, and was completely powerless to resist!
He was caught in the handcuffs and immediately began to suffocate: Damn it, I didn't control the force well, the vixen is not pretending anymore!

“Hundreds of years ago, there was a scorpion demon who was ugly but didn’t realize it. He dared to speak rudely to me, so I killed him and made this scorpion tail hook.”

"Look, there's one young man and one of us, isn't this a match made in heaven?"

Chen Xiuxian suddenly realized: So you turned the scorpion demon into a magical artifact?!

No, you guys even adapted it?!

Erwa didn't see much of what happened after that.

First, he hasn't even been born yet, so his innate abilities are still limited.

Secondly, the snake spirit used some kind of magic weapon to lower a curtain with four characters written on it, which blocked his all-seeing eyes.

But in any case, Grandpa doesn't seem to be in any immediate danger... right?

If Chen Xiuxian knew about this, he would definitely teach the Calabash Brothers to read first!
Compulsory education is essential!

The four characters on the veil-like artifact read: Not suitable for children.
……

Chen Xiuxian had originally thought that with the Calabash Brothers' abilities, they should come to rescue him soon.

Even if he wasn't the cunning Snake Queen—oops!—and not a match for the Snake Demon, he could still distract her and prevent her from pestering him all day long!
That snake's tail was really powerful!
After more than ten hours, even with his nearly 30% physical strength, he felt like his back was about to break, but the eldest child was still nowhere to be found!
No? Where did you go? Did you get lost in the wilderness?
You know what, we really did get lost!

Because of Chen Xiuxian, the snake demon didn't immediately try to capture the eldest gourd brother who had come to her door. Instead, she was thinking of keeping the gourd brothers occupied so as not to jeopardize her plans.
So the little demons lured the powerful and ever-growing Da Wa to the bottom of the cave.

The snake spirit used her Ruyi scepter to transform the place into a huge maze-like stone chamber.

The eldest child has been wandering around inside for almost ten hours!

You can't really blame the older child; he was less than a day old, never went to school, can't read, and can't even count to eight...

It's perfectly normal to be outmaneuvered by that cunning snake spirit.

At this moment, the second brother was also extremely anxious. He saw that his older brother was going further and further away, and was almost going to the bottom of the earth to embark on a journey to the center of the earth.

We can't count on him to save Grandpa.

A gust of wind blew by, and the orange gourd suddenly flipped over, falling to the ground with a snap—and the second child was born!
"Second Brother, Second Brother, Second Brother!" a group of gourds called out.

"Quickly, save Grandpa! Quickly, save Grandpa!"

Erwa leaned on the stone and pondered for a moment: "Hmm... I don't think there's a rush. Judging from the sound, Grandpa shouldn't have suffered much. It's probably the demon forcing Grandpa to do hard labor. It's not dangerous for the time being."

"Second brother, my abilities are clairvoyance and super hearing, but my combat power is lacking. If I were to go looking for monsters on my own, I'd probably just be throwing my gourd away."

At this moment, the third brother, Vajra Boy, spoke up on the vine: "Second brother, don't be afraid, I'm about to be born! I'll go with you then! I have a head of bronze and arms of iron, even if demons trap me in mazes and caves, I'm not afraid, I'll just smash them all to pieces!"

"Great!" a group of Calabash Brothers cheered.

Erwa nodded: "Alright! We'll rescue our eldest brother first, and then the three of us will go for it together. That demon won't stand a chance!"

　Brothers, I have to admit, there's a problem with what I wrote.

　　The original plan was to set the female lead as either a ghost or a fox spirit, representing good or evil, a female ghost, a fox spirit, a righteous fairy, or a demonic demoness!

　　As a result, I got carried away with writing and went off-topic!
　　Okay, I guess I'll just have to keep going...

　　
　
(End of this chapter)