For the rest of my life, please advise

Chapter 22 Lovesickness in One-third of the Earth (1)
I won't tell you that I miss you so much.

The doctor's grandparents have a big yard, and the old couple planted many trees.Not flowers or grass, but trees.Pocket-sized small camphor, small iron tree, and small wintersweet.In the afternoon, the old couple sat side by side on the balcony and basked in the sun together.Looking at their backs, I thought how great it would be if Gu Wei and I could hold hands and talk to each other like this in a few decades.

I once asked Gu Wei, if it wasn't me, then who would it be.

Gu Wei thought for a while and said that he might find a colleague, a doctor or a hospital administrator.

I begrudgingly asked why.He said that as he gets older, his parents will also be anxious, and he does not have enough time to start a relationship, so he should accept the introduction of a person from the same unit or circle by his parents or colleagues.If you find a doctor, you won't think he is busy at work.Find an administrator, and there will be someone who can take care of the family more.Then the two get acquainted in a regular manner, fall in love, get married, have children, and live.

He spoke very flatly.

I can just imagine him smiling when he's with another white coat.I won't hypocritically comment on whether it's love, because, if it wasn't for Gu Wei, I might have found a suitable partner in the eyes of others in the same circle, and faced the same marriage and love process.Lovers within the same work system can always understand each other better than lovers across systems because of the similarity in the nature and content of the work.

I looked into his eyes and imagined how he would look at me differently now than he would look at his "possible girlfriend".Gu Wei quietly let me stare at him.He was always calm and honest with me.

"If I had also studied medicine back then, our children would be able to play soy sauce by now. Ah, so many years have been wasted."

Gu Wei smiled: "Then the two of us may only see each other in a month, too busy."

I pinched his earlobe: "If you were not busy, I would not have found you."

Gu Wei has always felt that a doctor is a very unsuitable profession for love, tired, busy, and not free.He tried very hard to make up for these deficiencies, and he didn't say it clearly, but he gestured between the lines, and he would show apology from time to time.In the past three years, I have seen his approach at the beginning, his hesitation in the end, and his determination and hard work in the end, which made me feel distressed for no reason.

I quickly changed the subject: "Doctor, which one was better when you were in school, Chinese or English?"

Gu Wei thought for a while: "English."

Two tragic science students...

"Then--the Chinese test papers that the child gets back are too ugly. Should I train them or not? It doesn't make sense if you don't train them, but he has bad genes. Well, let's do it. I will manage all the daily management in the future, thinking I can also do work, but the violence like spanking should wait until you come back, we two will divide the work first..."

Gu Wei smiled lowly: "You changed the subject again."

During the Lantern Festival in 2012, I stayed in City X to spend the festival with Gu Wei's family.

Before dinner, Gu Wei went to the bedroom to call grandma. One minute later, his voice came from the room: "Xiaoxiao! Call 1!"

We spent that night in the hospital.

The director of the imaging department flipped through the CT scans one by one, and finally patted Gu Wei's arm without saying anything.Gu Wei looked at the picture on the screen, didn't move or speak, and after a long time, nodded his thanks.Although he had been mentally prepared for a long time, he still felt "chest tightness" when the real day came.

Compared to Gu Wei, Grandpa is much calmer.Two weeks later, he held his grandma's hand: "Shall we go home?"

The grandma on the hospital bed nodded peacefully.

Gu Wei obviously lost weight, and he insisted on going back to his grandparents every other day.I caressed the protruding bone of his wrist, but I didn't say anything after all.

In the new year of 2012, everyone's heart is a little heavy.During the Chinese New Year, I called my grandma to pay New Year's greetings, and Gu Wei stuck the phone to her ear.

"Grandma, Happy New Year to you."

"well."

I heard grandma's soft and low voice, and my nose was a little sour: "I will go back to see you in a few days."

Grandma smiled softly: "Okay. Grandpa and grandma miss you. Xiaobei misses you too."

The saddest thing in the world is watching the lives of loved ones go by before your eyes.After returning to X city, I will accompany Gu Wei to grandparents' house when I have free time.In front of the old man, he was impeccable and had a gentle smile. Only when he returned to the room did he show a sense of powerlessness.

April 4th, after three o'clock in the morning.

I slept very restlessly.In the dark, the phone vibrated, I woke up suddenly, and pressed the answer button——

"Grandma is dying."

I heard Gu Wei's low voice, and my heart sank.

"I just called Chen Cong to ask him to come to my shift in advance." He had to make sure there was someone on duty.

I immediately got up and changed clothes, ran out of the school gate and stopped a taxi to rush to the hospital.It was still dark, and I saw Gu Wei running out of the building.The light in the hall behind him could only illuminate the white breath he exhaled, but his expression could not be seen.None of us spoke a word along the way, and the atmosphere in the car was silent and gloomy.While waiting for the red light, I saw his index finger pointing the steering wheel slowly, and I could only caress his arm.

When I got home and rang the doorbell, my hand hurt a little from his grip.The door was quickly opened, and the doctor's wife said softly: "Go quickly." We went straight to the bedroom, and grandma was lying in the arms of the doctor's father.

Gu Wei gently knelt on one knee on the carpet beside the bed, stretched out his hand to hold hers.

Grandma narrowed her eyes, looked at him slowly, rubbed his hand lightly with her thumb, turned her eyes to me again, moved her lips without making a sound.

I wrapped my arms around Gu Wei's shoulders and looked at this gentle and tough old man. After experiencing the ups and downs of his life, he closed his eyes surrounded by his children and grandchildren, and was as quiet as if he fell asleep. At 5:57, the doctor's father took out his hand to support her side neck, shook his head and said, "Gone." In the thin morning sun, he passed away peacefully.

Gu Wei shook her hand, then gently let go.The doctor's wife came forward to change the old man's clothes, and we withdrew.

I led Gu Wei to the balcony, squinting my eyes to see the sun slowly spreading from the sky, passing through the faint morning mist unique to this season.

Gu Wei sat on a small square table on the balcony. The chessboard engraved on the wooden table had faded, and the surface was smooth due to years of wiping.He stretched out his finger and slid across the indentation on it: "When I was a child, grandpa taught me to play chess on this table, and grandma and I played against him."

I stroked his back, Gu Wei blinked slowly, hugged my waist, and buried his face in my arms.The morning air was a bit chilly, and his breath pressed against my chest warmly.I stroked his hair: "You can continue to use it to teach our children in the future."

Life is always reincarnated, and we cannot control its coming and going.So we calmly face what we have experienced, cherish what we are experiencing, and keep hope for what we are about to experience, so that at least when we leave, we can be peaceful and peaceful without any regrets.

From childhood to adulthood, I have attended many funerals. The most recent one was in my junior year. The one who passed away was my classmate, who had a blood disease.It was a funeral that everyone found unacceptable—so young, so sudden, alive and kicking with us three months ago.

At the funeral, I still remember a part of the last speech given by an international student.

"During our lives, there've always been departures with families, friends or lovers.
They passed off, ran away or just disappeared, things that you can't get control of. It's terribly insufferable however, you will accept at last, watching their receding backs. Until one day, we know how to lose, how to gain, how to cherish what we have with her. Then we finally learn how to say goodbye.
Wish that her best time was spent with you, and with her forever.”

Gu Wei is the eldest grandson, and the task of keeping filial piety is heavy.Since he closed his eyes on my shoulder for a quarter of an hour in the morning, he hasn't closed his eyes again.After the mourning hall was set up, he changed into a black suit and received people who came to express their condolences.

During the three days of vigil, Gu Wei hardly slept at all.

"School, take Xiaobei to rest for a while." The doctor's wife patted my arm.

I went over and took Gu Wei's hand, pulled him into the study, and put him on the armchair: "Sleep for a while."

He looked at me and said nothing.

I took his hand: "Close your eyes and rest your mind."

Gu Wei blinked, and slowly closed it.I leaned on the desk in front of him, saw that his breathing was steady but not steady, his brows tightened and loosened, and he didn't have anything for 10 minutes, then I opened my eyes again and looked at me without speaking.

I straightened up and was pulled in front of him.Two hands stretched in from the hem of my sweater, looped to the back of my waist, and slowly moved up until they stuck to the butterfly bone, tightened, and pressed my face against my chest.

I kissed his forehead and hugged his shoulder: "I'm here to watch you, go to sleep."

Gu Wei finally fell asleep like this.

If Gu Wei's reaction made me feel distressed, then Grandpa's reaction made me sad.Sitting on the chair, looking at the corpse quietly, eating, sleeping, lost in thought, with the unique vicissitudes and stability of the old man.

The men of the Gu family, their sadness is not released, not abnormal, no tears, no thoughts, treats people decently, greets and sends them politely, but silences themselves like a hollow log, neither cold nor cold, but clear Let you know that there is a piece of his heart missing.

After the funeral, grandpa took out a box: "Grandma picked this."

The doctor's father on the side nodded slightly to us, and Gu Wei took it: "Thank you, grandpa and grandma."

Inside the box are a pair of mutton fat jade pendants and a small post - beautiful son and daughter-in-law.

I don't know if it was the impact of grandma's death, but Comrade Gu Xiao returned home.During the two days when I was defending, it happened that he returned to X City, and Gu Wei went to pick him up.When I returned to Gu Wei's apartment after finishing my school work, when I opened the door, there was a smell of alcohol, and I saw a person lying on the bed in the shape of "big", and dialed the phone with a headache: "Doctor, what is your bed? what's going on?"

To put it simply, Comrade Gu Xiao lost his love again, and the heartbroken person finally regretted that the good girl was still in the motherland, so he came back.Laying in the bar all night, Gu Wei took her back to the apartment at noon yesterday.Gu Wei was on duty at night, so people who were not in charge continued to drink.

Looking at the unrecognizable apartment, I really want to shout: What kind of troubles have you developed after drifting abroad for several years!
When Gu Wei came back after handing over his shift, I had just cleaned out the sofa and asked him to open the window for ventilation, and then I went out to buy something at a nearby convenience store.

I was holding a bunch of things, the phone vibrated violently, I freed up one hand and struggled to pick it up——

"Wife!" shouted earth-shattering.The things in my arms almost fell to the ground.

"Auntie is here. It's half an hour at the most."

"Aunt—Mother Gu Xiao?!"

"Well, my mother told her that she was with me, and my aunt came over as soon as she heard it. My mother is now chasing after me."

"Jesus!" Aunt Xiao was so queenly, seeing the mess, Gu Xiao would be torn down on the spot.I hurriedly piled a bunch of things in my hand onto the cash register, "Wake up Gu Xiao first, take a shower and brush your teeth, hang out the quilt, throw the sheets into the washing machine, and I'll go back right away."

We had barely finished cleaning the battlefield when the men arrived.

Aunt Xiao: "When did you come to Gu Wei's place?"

"The day before yesterday." Gu Wei.

"Yesterday." Gu Xiao said.

I turned my face away, do you want to reveal your secrets so soon...

For half an hour, facing all Aunt Xiao's questions, Gu Xiao didn't make any response at all, which was quite hooligan.

Aunt Xiao got up: "Come home with me."

"I live at my brother's place." Gu Xiao was resolute and would not let go.

In the end, the doctor, mother and son made peace with each other before persuading Aunt Xiao to go back.

When Gu Wei sent the person back, Gu Xiao raised his chin to me: "Why isn't she leaving?"

hiss--

"Gu Xiao, even a Buddha has three points of fire." Do you think I'm a stone statue that won't get angry?

Gu Xiao curled his lips: "I'm annoyed when I see women now."

Gu Wei opened the door: "There is a public restroom diagonally across the road. When you go to the men's restroom, wake up as you like."

Gu Xiaomo remained silent, and after a long time, his eyes were red: "Why is it so difficult to find a good girl?"

In fact, Gu Xiao can be regarded as the proud son of heaven, with a good family background and good looks, and he can be regarded as smooth sailing in his studies and work. Speaking of his name, he is actually - he is not picking up girls, he is being picked up.Sometimes good conditions are not necessarily good, because it is too easy to be regarded as a hunting target.Moreover, he prefers girls with similar backgrounds to him, and in the end it often becomes a game of death. In addition, he is a hedgehog in private affairs, so every time he breaks up, he can't get other people's support. pity.

I looked at the obviously sluggish person, and sighed: "Gu Xiao, marriage is different from love. When facing a blind date, you can add and subtract the other person's family background, education, wealth, and appearance to see if they are in the same range as you, but Such an evaluation won’t help you find a girlfriend.” Love may end up being a game of addition and subtraction, but it won’t be at the beginning, “A girl is only determined by what school you’ve studied, how much money you’ve earned, and what position you’re in. With you, it doesn't matter if you don't want this kind of girl. No matter how rational love is, there is always an irrational inducement as the beginning, and those rules and regulations will never become the reason for love. "

I don't know if Gu Xiao and I have settled down.Although he is still a hedgehog in front of me, since Gu Wei and I had a long talk with him that afternoon, he has never troubled me again.Think about it, I am really a kind sister-in-law.

Doctor's handwriting: You'd better not let Gu Xiao hear your words.

June is another year of parting season, we are not sad at all.

Xiaocao and I have successfully entered our fourth year of living together. In the words of passer-by A, it is "insidiously occupying the resources of the school dormitory".My unit is not far from the school, and I study and work at the same time. Passerby A and Passerby B both signed up to good units.Since then, all members of the first group have continued to survive in City X without incident.So this month, it is inevitable to dawdle together.In this way, it is inevitable to ignore the doctor.

In this regard, the doctor had a special understanding at the beginning, then a relatively understanding, and in the end, he did not want to understand.

On this day, I received a call from the doctor: "We have been together for three years, let's have a meal to celebrate."

Now in June, how do you count the three years? ? ...

In the Thai restaurant, the smell of spices hit my face as soon as I entered the door. I sneezed on the doctor's shoulder: "Well, the smell is very positive." The doctor laughed, God knows why he is in such a good mood today.

We came early and there were not many people.There are layers of banana leaves in the room, and the marble pool draws running water. The little red carps inside are quite lively. When the doctor passed by, one jumped out of the pool, turned over and fell back with a plop. He smiled and held me back. Take a seat by the pool and order your meal.

In front of the pool is a small stage, a small three-person band is performing, the lead singer and bassist are typical Thai faces, singing soft carpenter.While waiting for the meal, I folded the napkin and hummed unconsciously until the end of the song, I heard "Hi~", I looked up, the bass player turned to us and gave a thumbs up, I was instantly embarrassed.Looking at the doctor opposite, he mopped his chin with his left hand, and pointed his right hand on the table in a leisurely manner. The shimmering light flowed behind the lens, and I was instantly killed. I lay down on the table with a blushing face, and his chin was supported by him: "Don't lie around."

I wailed: "Doctor, your eyes are too attractive, I can't take it..."

The doctor laughed: "Who seduced whom?"

I held the doctor's lemon juice and didn't let go. I watched the person opposite me concentrate on unpacking the grilled short ribs. My fair skin was dyed a little pink because of eating chili. I was so happy to see that I suddenly wanted to sing a song for him .In fact, the doctor and I are usually considered stable people, but we just bumped into each other...

The guitarist had just finished singing Hotel California when I stepped onto the stage with the doctor's surprised expression on his face.

I was standing all alone against the world outside
You were searching for a place to hide
Lost and lonely, now you've given me the will to survive
When we're hungry, love will keep us alive
……

When stepping off the stage, the bass player teased in blunt Chinese: "Newly married, husband and wife?"

On weekends, Sansan took the time to inspect my unit as usual, and gave a pertinent evaluation: "The lighting is good."

The two of them each had a cup of fruit tea and chatted with each other.The short-circuited tendon in our Xiao Gong's brain finally got through, and Xiao Zhongyi finally kept the clouds open to see the moon.

(End of this chapter)