What do you want in life

Chapter 39 Can the Oath of the Past Become Forever (18)
Cao Wenyu accompanied the two of them to the reserved private room, whispered a few words with Shen Nanzhang before closing the door and leaving.

Shen Nanzhang personally ordered the tea and desserts. He asked Xiaoying about her taste in advance, and ordered a pot of good Keemun black tea and some colorful flowers.When the black tea was poured into the glass, the red color diffused and the fragrance was lingering. Shen Nanzhang picked up the cup and took a sip, with a skillful expression on his expression.

"Xiao Han, I'm looking for you today, I think you know why?" When Shen Nanzhang put down his teacup, he stopped going around with her, and cut directly to the topic, and the call he called was to Xiaoying. It is also meaningful to say that he called her "Xiaohan" instead of "Xiaoying", which is not unfamiliar with her full name, and at the same time, he will not be forced to appear very close to her-this is what the whole Nanxiang calls her.

Although Xiaoying had some guesses about his intention to find her, she would never run into him on her own initiative. She cast a glance at Shen Nanzhang, shook her head slowly and said, "Mr. Shen, I don't know very well."

Shen Nanzhang sighed, "Juncheng's mother has been bedridden for many days, and he doesn't even have time to go back and take a look. We will raise him, and we will inevitably feel desolate!"

Xiaoying gradually lowered her head under his Shen Ruqianjun gaze. She understood that no matter what excuses she used to cover up, Shen Juncheng's behavior was unjustifiable, and she was the catalyst that prompted him to do so. She didn't even have a chance to refute her adoptive father's grievances.

Shen Nanzhang continued: "I took the liberty to ask you out today, so I might as well talk about it. I'm not an unreasonable person, and I don't have any prejudice against you. As for the matter between you and Juncheng , I didn't want to interfere at first, who doesn't have a young age! But, his mother disagrees with your matter, eh!"

Xiaoying just listened and didn't speak.

"His mother has some opinions on you. I think you know this well in your heart. Of course, they are all old issues. Let's not mention them now. Let's just talk about Juncheng."

"Although Juncheng was not born to his mother, she regarded him as more important than her own life. Since childhood, she has made many plans for him, including studying, going abroad, and developing in any direction. Every step of the way, she has made plans for him. I hope he can go well, don't make detours, and don't get hurt. As a mother, she treats Juncheng with care."

Xiaoying was not unfamiliar with this information at all. She had heard it from Shen Juncheng a few years ago, but at that time, he was not grateful for the efforts of his adoptive mother, but very distressed.

Shen Nanzhang and Feng Xiaoyu's tone suddenly fell back heavily, "But, how did Juncheng treat her? He actually ignored our kindness for raising him, and just walked away! Xiaoying, I really want to ask Let me ask you, can you really feel at ease when you live elsewhere in the future?"

Xiaoying's heart clenched tightly, and she took a sip of tea as if defending herself, her mouth full of bitterness.She knows that today's test is difficult, but she still keeps cheering herself up in her heart, she must persevere, she cannot be persuaded by him so easily, she must be cruel, because she is for the happiness of both her and Shen Juncheng .

"Chairman Shen," she raised her head full of bitterness, and began to find some words to say: "Shen Juncheng, he is not an ungrateful person, he... wants to live with me, we want to live together, but his mother refuses to admit it." I... It's definitely not what he wants to do when he leaves home, he..." She found herself incoherent.

"Then," Shen Nanzhang narrowed his eyes slightly, and there was a sharp light refracted from the slits in his eyes. At this moment, Xiaoying suddenly found that his expression was so similar to Shen Juncheng's, and she lost her mind for a moment.

"You also admit that it was a last resort for Juncheng to run away from home." Shen Nanzhang continued, "The reason why he left was not because he was just our adopted son, but because of you——can I understand that?"

Xiaoying came out of her chaotic thoughts and looked at Shen Nanzhang in horror. The kindness in the latter's eyes had already turned into a sharp edge, "Since you know it all, why do you still hold him? You are not afraid that one day, he will Is life unsatisfactory and blame you instead? He could have a bright future, but now he gave up for you. I think this is a pity for any man, and he will regret it in the future. Xiao Han, you really How long have we been together? It’s only a few months in total, and half of the time is from the memories of eight years ago. Do you really have confidence in such a relationship? How much do you know about Juncheng?”

Under Shen Nanzhang's series of questioning, Xiaoying felt her mouth was parched, and her throat seemed to be on fire, so dry that she couldn't make a sound.

Shen Nanzhang said again: "He had a ridiculous time when he was abroad. I don't know if he mentioned this to you? I think you only saw Shen Juncheng's best side. I am his father , I know him better than you know him, if I were you," he cast his eyes on Xiaoying's eyes, those sharp eyes seemed to penetrate into the depths of Xiaoying's soul.

"If I were you, I would choose to leave him and find a peaceful and responsible home." He took a long breath, "A person like Shen Juncheng will not belong to you, at least, he will not belong to you forever."

It seems that everything that should be said has been said, and Shen Nanzhang also feels a little tired. He believes that the words he said have weight, enough to wake up Han Xiaoying's mind, and make her realize what an outrageous thing she is doing wrong thing!

No one is selfish, no matter how much two people love each other, once they are at the juncture of endangering their own interests, it is impossible not to think about themselves.

The essence of human nature is similar, even the slightest or even out-of-the-box suspicion will be like a needle, piercing people's heart and hurting them, and eventually they have to give up-this is what he is sure about.

He leaned heavily on the back of the chair, folded his hands on the table, and waited for Han Xiaoying's reaction.

After a long time, Xiaoying's pale face finally recovered a little. She quietly looked at Shen Nanzhang from the other end of the table, her eyes were as clear as water.

"Mr. Shen, I understand what you mean." She took a deep breath, "However, both you and his mother seem to have overlooked the most essential thing."

Shen Nanzhang slowly raised his eyes, and looked at her in confusion. He didn't understand how this girl could remain so calm after listening to the analysis he just made. Want to stick to your position?
He frowned a little displeased, but still ordered himself to listen patiently to Xiaoying.

"You all have forgotten what Shen Juncheng needs as an individual." When Xiaoying said this, she suddenly found that her thoughts became smoother, "You are imposing your kindness on him as something he must accept. He, but have you ever thought about whether this is what he really wants? I don't deny that you all love him, even though he is only your adopted son, but can you not regard him as a thing for you? What about his personal belongings? Can you, respect his own feelings?"

In fact, every word in these words was thrown at Shen Nanzhang with fierce force. Xiaoying was glad that she always controlled the rhythm and intonation when she spoke, and didn't make herself excited or even high-pitched like a denouncer. If that was the case , maybe she will be interrupted by Shen Nanzhang if she fails to finish her speech - anyway, he is also an elder, and she was once the highest boss.

Shen Nanzhang was indeed much more magnanimous than Xiaoying had imagined, and even his expression did not change much.He just straightened up slightly in astonishment.

He didn't expect that the seemingly weak girl in front of him actually didn't lack backbone at all. Now, he understood why Shen Juncheng fell in love with her.

"As for your worries about me," Xiaoying smiled and said, "I think worrying about the future itself is superfluous."

She lowered her head and said after a while: "Since I was ten years old, I have parted ways with things like 'happiness'. It is Shen Juncheng who helped me find it again and let me find that the world can be beautiful again. If one day , he left me, I have nothing to complain about, at least, I have been happy. I never care about 'gain', what should I worry about 'lose'?"

Shen Nanzhang was shocked by her smile. He had to admit that he had underestimated this girl. Her quiet temperament and strong heart were all qualities he admired, but it was a pity that they stood on different positions. He now What he had to do was to let Juncheng leave her and return to himself and his wife. He had to think about Wu Qiuyue's health.

"So, you don't intend to give up on Shen Juncheng?"

Xiaoying also looked at him, "Mr. Shen, I never meant to take him by force. He stayed by my side because he felt happy. If he wants to leave, I will never force him to stay - this choice, I want to leave it to him to do it himself."

Shen Nanzhang closed his eyes, and after a while, he opened them slowly, "Is what you said just now what Juncheng himself meant?"

"He didn't say that, but I can see it." Xiaoying looked at Shen Nanzhang's expression that didn't get angry. For some reason, she suddenly had a strong expectation for him. She could feel that Shen Nanzhang was He loves Shen Juncheng very much from the bottom of his heart, his love is different from Wu Qiuyue's unreasonable, just like now, even though Shen Juncheng has made a choice between her and his adoptive parents, Shen Nanzhang can still talk to her calmly, while It's not like looking for someone to threaten and intimidate herself like Wu Qiuyue.He seemed intent on listening to well-meaning opinions, and he seemed to be looking for a happy solution.

Xiaoying's heart was beating heavily again. She wanted to make some more efforts to see if she could use his strength to reconcile Shen Juncheng and the Shen family. After all, it was Shen Juncheng who had such a tense relationship with the Shen family. Untie the knot.

"Chairman Shen, maybe there are some things that I shouldn't say..." Xiaoying spoke boldly, but hesitated for a while.

"Come on, it's just the two of us here, tonight, you can say whatever you want." Shen Nanzhang nodded slightly, encouraging her.

Xiaoying licked her lips, "Mr. Shen, in fact, what Shen Juncheng cares about is his own identity. He is your adopted son. If it wasn't for his biological parents' decision, he shouldn't have appeared in your house. He can be a Ordinary people are free people, and they will not be imposed too many responsibilities. He told me that his ideal is not to run a business, but to run a group company, but he still did it according to your wishes, because He feels that this is his mission and his responsibility. If you think about it from his perspective, he has been doing things he doesn't like to do."

"So, what does he like to do?" Shen Nanzhang interjected.

"This, you should ask him personally." Xiaoying glanced at him, lowered her voice a little, "and asked him before he had a chance to grasp his ideal."

Shen Nanzhang let out a long breath, he understood what Xiaoying meant, she was blaming him for never caring about Shen Juncheng's personal thoughts.

"So, when he realized that he could not have to take on these responsibilities that he didn't like, his first reaction was of course to run away. You think he left the Shen family because of me, but I don't think he is completely Because of this..." She paused, staring into Shen Nanzhang's eyes and said, "He hopes to get the freedom he dreamed of."

Shen Nanzhang slowly digested Xiaoying's words in his heart.

Xiaoying said again: "Shen Juncheng never thought of denying you, if you can open up to him, don't either, let him live the life he wants, let him be with whoever he wants to be with." Whoever you are with, he will not forget you, he will come back to honor you, he is not the kind of ungrateful person..."

She spoke with excitement, but Shen Nanzhang on the opposite side just looked at her with silent and calm eyes, and there was no trace of infection by her words in those deep eyes.

Xiaoying's heart skipped a beat, and her mind calmed down. She suddenly realized how naive and idealistic her words were.

Shen Nanzhang took out his cigarette case, and raised his hand at her, "Can you?"

Xiaoying nodded nervously.

Shen Nanzhang took out a cigarette, lit it, took a puff slowly, and then took another puff. From his expression, Xiaoying vaguely felt that he seemed to be making a major decision.

"You also said just now that Juncheng is a responsible child. Everyone should have a sense of responsibility..." Shen Nanzhang took a puff of smoke and said slowly: "Okay, let me tell you why Shen Juncheng insists on You can't go back to the Shen family, why must he inherit the business of the Shen family."

Xiaoying's eyes gradually became bewildered.

"Juncheng... is my biological son."

The words that Shen Nanzhang uttered slowly were like a thunderbolt, which exploded in Xiaoying's ears, and she didn't know where she was.

"My wife had an accident during her pregnancy, which made her infertile for the rest of her life. She proposed to adopt a child, and I agreed. But at the time, I had a selfish intention because of a sudden mistake. I wanted... to have my own flesh and blood, so ..."

He didn't complete the sentence, but Xiaoying understood what happened later, "Then his biological mother..."

Shen Nanzhang looked at her, and seemed reluctant to continue talking, but the words had already reached this point, and there was no point in covering up.

"We made a contract. After the child was born, she would receive a sum of money from me, and then she would never see Juncheng again. I arranged for Juncheng to go to the countryside. After a few months, my wife and I went to the countryside together. Go choose a child. Juncheng has been likable since he was a child, my wife caught him at first sight, and took him home without much trouble."

Xiaoying was stunned for a moment, then murmured and asked: "Then your wife, does she know..."

"No, she doesn't know." Shen Nanzhang shook his head, stared at Xiaoying again and said, "I told you this secret, just to tell you that Juncheng didn't appear in Shen's house by accident, he belonged to There, he is the continuation of my blood."

Xiaoying was so shocked that she couldn't speak, she thought she was dreaming, or listening to the Arabian Nights.

At the same time, she suddenly found that the chances of winning in her hands were decreasing rapidly - she read Shen Nanzhang's firm determination from his eyes.

"Juncheng is my only hope. I took such a big risk to bring him back. Do you think I might just give up on him? He is also my wife's greatest comfort. Maybe you still can't realize that one can't do it. The pain of a mother's woman." His smile was rarely filled with bitterness.

"If I say that, you'll probably laugh at me for being selfish." Shen Nanzhang sighed with a smile, "Maybe you won't understand until you become a mother yourself one day."

Xiaoying didn't smile, she didn't even have the strength to refute, the only thing she could understand now was that she was competing with a father for Shen Juncheng.

But, does she really have the strength to persevere to the end?

At this moment, she just felt weak all over, and hope was like sand falling out of her heart little by little.And Shen Nanzhang's "offensive" is far from over.

"As his father, of course I won't harm him. I think the same is true for you. You also hope that Juncheng can live well, right? You can assume that he will follow you and stay with him at Shen's house. Which choice is wiser for him? You can give him love, and after a few years, maybe he will get tired of it, even if you can still stay together, do you know what a man's greatest desire is?"

Shen Nanzhang paused here, as if he was waiting for Xiaoying's answer, but of course he couldn't wait for Xiaoying's response, so he continued: "It's a success! Juncheng is just what he thinks he got now." Freedom blinded his eyes. When he suddenly realized one day that he wanted to start a career, he had already been mediocre by the ordinary life and no longer had the will to fight. Even if I let him return to that position, he might But—if he stays, despite his dissatisfaction, one day he will understand our painstaking efforts, he will become a good entrepreneur, he will get everything I have, and In my assessment of his ability, I believe he will be more successful than me, and you will also be responsible for all of this—by then, I think Juncheng will be very grateful for your choice today."

Xiaoying's hands involuntarily clenched the hem of the tablecloth, trembling slightly.

Shen Nanzhang's words could not but be said to have hit her vitals.Her thoughts were completely stuck on the former assumption of his plan - a few years later, when Shen Juncheng, who had become mediocre and incompetent, finally wanted to start a career, what would he do to herself?
She could endure loneliness, but she couldn't tolerate a man she loved hating herself!

What would she do if that day came?
Is she really doing something wrong?

Her mind was in turmoil again.

All the changes in her expression were observed by Shen Nanzhang. He knew that he had persuaded her, so he breathed a sigh of relief.

He had never felt so hard and tired to deal with anything like today.

"Xiaoying, I've finished what I have to say. I won't force you to make a decision, I'm just stating the important relationship to you. I can see that you are a sensible child, and you...should not disappoint a young man. The old father's expectations, right?"

Xiaoying lowered her head, trembling like chaff all over her body, her vulnerable appearance was like an old phantom, which touched the softest part of Shen Nanzhang's heart, and he sighed deeply helplessly.

"As for you, Xiaoying, I will find an opportunity to persuade Juncheng's mother, maybe one day..." He stopped suddenly, he didn't want to ignite a girl's hope with illusory promises. cruel.

Xiaoying obviously understood what he meant, but she also didn't have any hope in her heart. Wu Qiuyue's hateful eyes had been imprinted in her heart for a long time like engravings on a wooden board. She understood that to change a person's concept, sometimes Harder than killing him/her.

But she finally calmed herself down, looked up with a sad smile, and asked Shen Nanzhang in a mocking tone, "What if she doesn't agree?"

(End of this chapter)