What do you want in life

Chapter 65 Don't Want to Lose Your Smile (16)
"Colleagues are waiting for me downstairs." Xiaoying explained in a low voice, holding the tender even tighter, as if afraid of being snatched away.

Shen Juncheng's slightly narrowed star eyes fixed on her unsteady face, and suddenly grabbed her wrist by surprise, turned around and walked towards his office.

He strode forward, but Xiaoying, who was dragged by him, turned pale with fright, staggered and almost fell on top of him, she had to push Shen Juncheng with the hand holding the bidding document, to prevent herself from really falling Go down, and the bidding documents are scattered all over the place!
"Wait, my bid!" Xiaoying yelled in a low voice. Xiao Yuxin's office was on the same floor, and she didn't dare to make too much noise to provoke her again.

Shen Juncheng stopped, but he didn't let go of her, and walked back a few steps with her, watching her bend down to pick up the messy papers one by one.

She lowered her head, Shen Juncheng couldn't see the expression on her face at the moment, but her soft waist was bent up and down with her movements, and the scattered temple hair was hanging down from her ears, fluttering helplessly in the wind, his Suddenly, there was a burst of sadness in my heart, and I slowly walked forward to help her pick up the tender documents together.

"Thank you." When she straightened up, she said something softly to him, but her eyes were full of tears.

Shen Juncheng suddenly turned his eyes away, and at the same time, the hand that was holding her loosened suddenly, he was a little awake, he had to wake up, he knew that he was hurting her again, "I'm sorry."

Xiaoying gently wiped away the tears from her eyes with her fingers, and shook her head with a forced smile. She was always so disappointing, she always shed tears so easily in front of him.

"Do you have something you want to tell me?" She looked at him quietly, "Me too... go to your office and talk."

After closing the door, Shen Juncheng pointed to the sofa with a somewhat decadent expression, "Sit, what do you want to say to me?"

Xiaoying stood near the door without moving. The bid document had been safely returned to her hand, but she suddenly lost her desire for it, and even felt a little disgusted with it.

"I just came from Miss Xiao," she explained slowly, "she told me that Curran's sample quality inspection data is not good."

Shen Juncheng breathed a sigh of relief, walked to the sofa and sat down, resting his chin on one hand, as if he was thinking about something seriously.

"You don't have to do this." Xiaoying looked at him and said, "It's hard for me to do this...Fan Zhijun, Mr. Fan, now he sees me as a life-saving straw, I'm afraid I won't be able to bear it in the end..."

Shen Juncheng's hand finally came down from the jaw, and he interrupted her very simply, "This has nothing to do with you, Ke Lan is my favorite, it has potential, one or two sample data can't explain anything."

Xiaoying was not relieved, but Shen Juncheng's words were impeccable, she could only nod her head, "It would be best if this is the case, I hope Ke Lan can win the bid through fair competition, not anything else."

"Don't worry, my own company, of course I'm not kidding. I have my reasons for choosing Ke Lan." Shen Juncheng reluctantly continued to comfort her, with a stiff smile.

"After I go back, I will try to see if I can apply for a job transfer within the company. If it is not possible, I may resign. In the future, I will not come here again, and please...don't let me come here in this way again. If you have any problems, you can directly find Mr. Fan or Wang Kai to solve them."

The smile on Shen Juncheng's face disappeared instantly.

"Why?" He stood up and approached her step by step, "You won't let me find you, OK, no problem! Why do you even cancel normal work contacts? You know how much I want to see you, Han Xiaoying, When did you become so cruel?"

Seeing his usually gentle face suddenly turn livid, Xiaoying felt a chill in her heart, as if pierced by an arrow, and she saw the long-endured pain and preparedness in his eyes. Sullen.

She didn't back down, trying to wake him up with words, "Mr. Shen, I've told you many times, I'm a person with a family, I can't go back to the past, I have to be responsible for my family, I... ..."

"Enough!" Shen Juncheng growled at her, his patience was exhausted, "I know you are married, you are married to someone else! You don't need to remind me over and over again!"

He pushed her to the bottom of the wall, her feet seemed to be glued together and she couldn't move away. She could only be surrounded by his arms. She looked at his almost hideous eyes, and her uneasiness and sadness firmly controlled her. , but she couldn't do anything, couldn't say anything.

"Do you know how much I miss you? Do you know that I have to fight myself every day? I want to see you, but I dare not go to you blatantly, because I am not qualified! What should I do? You tell me what the hell what to do?"

He let go of her, took a step back, his face was still ashen, and he continued, gritted his teeth: "You are right, I gave the business to Kelan because of you! You are in Kelan, this project is related to you, I I want to make you happy! I want to make your life better, am I doing something wrong?" After a pause, he shouted again, almost bitterly: "What is business to me? It's just a pass. Just a time pass! Do you think I'm really that ambitious? No, I'm not! I'm not!"

He was tired of shouting, and suddenly there was a lot of sadness in his eyes. He looked at Xiaoying's eyes full of sadness, "You always know what I want...you know, right? I just want to A simple life, being with the person I love the most, seeing her every morning when I wake up, cooking delicious food for her, taking good care of her... listening to her carefree smile. "

As Xiaoying listened, something suddenly choked her throat, and the fog blinded her eyes.

"But I have been struggling all these years, but I still can't grasp anything. I really don't know what to do... I can't fall in love with others, and I can't destroy other people's families to snatch you back."

Tears rolled down Xiaoying's cheeks.

Shen Juncheng looked at her, and slowly stretched out his hand to wipe away the tears on her face. He said slowly in a pleading tone: "Just let me get closer to you, can't you? At least, I can still watch when I'm feeling sad." look at you..."

Xiaoying couldn't control it anymore, she burst into tears, "Don't do this! Shen Juncheng, I beg you, you can find a girl who is much better than me, why do you have to do this? Why do you want to tie yourself up in the past?"

Shen Juncheng hugged her tightly, pressed her crying face gently against his chest, gently stroked her neck with his hand, and sighed softly, "Maybe because we met too early, you have become There is no way to let go of a part of my life...I also...don't want to let go...it's impossible, it's too late..."

Xiaoying lay in Shen Juncheng's arms, crying until dark. She felt that her internal organs were crushed and crushed by his words. If it was possible, she really hoped that time could stop here. They hugged here like this, Even if it can only be condensed into a sculpture, even if 1 years of time flow past her like water, she will not hesitate.

But can she?

Time can't stay for anyone, life has to go on, and the responsibilities on their shoulders are no longer consistent, he has his, she has hers, and they are irrelevant.

She tried her best to separate herself from Shen Juncheng, who was close to Shen Juncheng, and in an instant, she saw that Shen Juncheng's eye circles were also red, not only the eye circles, but also the bloodshot eyes that were like heartbreak.

Xiaoying didn't dare to look too much, she wiped her wet cheeks indiscriminately, picked up her things and wanted to run away.Shen Juncheng didn't stop her anymore, and watched her silently doing all these behaviors of leaving him, until she walked towards the door——

"If he treats you badly, let me know," he said.

Xiaoying didn't look back, but answered him in a hoarse voice, "No, he treats me very well."

"Do not lie to me."

She didn't respond to him anymore, opened the door and walked out.

She is not him. She already has a family, a husband who loves her, and a lovely child. If this family is destroyed, she will not be able to get happiness, so she has to persevere no matter how difficult it is.

In the evening breeze, Xiaoying sat on the balcony in a daze, perhaps because she cried too much in the afternoon, and the back of her head still hurts.

Xiaozhi is dancing guns and clubs in the living room. From time to time, there are sounds of objects sweeping the ground and Xiaozhi's annoyed "babbling". He has been doing well in the kindergarten recently, and he has forgotten all his previous scars. Diplomatic relations have been restored, and people are much more lively and cheerful than when they were at home.

Xiaoying didn't stop him out loud like before. She was really tired today, physically and mentally exhausted.

"Mom, your phone number!" Xiaozhi suddenly dropped his sword, and ran into the balcony with Xiaoying's mobile phone in his hand, as if he was asking for credit. He was both surprised and disturbed by his mother's "extrajudicial favor" today.

"Is that dad?" Xiaozhi tilted his head and looked at his mother flatteringly.

"No." Xiaoying took his brains away, "It's Aunt Guo Jia——Xiao Zhi is good, go play by yourself."

Xiaozhi made sure that his mother was not angry, grinned happily, and rushed back to the living room like the wind to fight the imaginary enemy again.

"How are you doing?" Guo Jiasheng's lively voice came from the phone.

"It's okay." Xiaoying replied weakly, "What about you? Are you still on a blind date?"

"Huh? You've quit doing that a long time ago, so you can't say something happy. I'm disgusted, don't you? Do you have to keep which pot unopened?" Guo Jia smacked her lips in distaste for her.

There was a hint of a smile on Xiaoying's lips, and her mood improved a little when she heard Guo Jia's familiar crisp voice, "You have to work hard!"

"Don't worry, my big plan this year is to sell myself." Guo Jia smiled confidently, "Huh? Why does your throat sound rustling? Do you have a cold?"

"No," Xiaoying sniffled, "Guo Jia."

"what?"

"Finding a boyfriend shouldn't be so utilitarian, it won't be too late to marry after you are sure that he is really suitable for you." Xiaoying stared at the sunset as bright as an egg yolk in the distance, persuading her quietly.

Guo Jia was silent for a moment, "Why do you suddenly feel sad, it can't be... arguing with Li Zhen, right?"

"How could it be?" Xiaoying denied with a strong smile.

"How is Shen Juncheng in City H? Has he ever looked for you?" Guo Jia said quickly, "To be honest, I was quite worried about the three of you. When you got married, Shen Juncheng seemed to have lost his soul. Where is it now? I didn’t even go, but ran towards the land where you were, the more I think about it, the more I feel about it..."

"Guo Jia, what do you think I should do?" Xiaoying suddenly loosened the shackles that were tied to her body, and no longer blindly rejected other people's concerns. She needed someone to talk to, otherwise she would go crazy!
"What should I do?" Guo Jia was stunned for a moment, but when she heard her trembling tone, she thought something was wrong.

"Shen Juncheng," Xiaoying swallowed her saliva, swallowing her sobs back together, "He has been looking for me, he said...he said he still loves me..."

Guo Jia rolled his eyes to the sky, and all his conjectures were confirmed.

Xiaoying still couldn't hold back her sobs, she bit her clothes desperately to keep her crying from becoming raging, "Guo Jia, I'm really in pain right now... I don't want to see him like that, but I can't do anything, I Really, really..." She couldn't speak convulsively.

"Xiaoying! Xiaoying!" Guo Jia became more and more uncomfortable, "You have to calm down! Well, does Li Zhen know about this? How did he react?"

Xiaoying sank down in one breath, then sucked it up again, but she didn't answer Guo Jia for a long time.

"He knows?" Guo Jia guessed cautiously.

There was still silence on the phone.

According to Guo Jia's experience, Xiaoying's silence is basically equivalent to acquiescing, and she sighed in her heart, "It's over!"

Xiaoying's sobs came to the eardrums intermittently, Guo Jia clenched his palms into fists, and then opened them again, "Xiaoying, listen to me, you, you can't mess around! You have to think clearly! Oh, Why is Shen Juncheng like this!"

"Don't blame him!" Xiaoying held back her sobs and denied Guo Jia, "It's not his fault, he didn't do anything."

"Yes! He's right!" Guo Jia felt irritated and pitiful for Xiaoying's obsession. He wanted to give her some harsh words at first, but when he heard her crying, his heart softened and he flinched. went back.

"Stop crying, what are you going to do?" Guo Jia sighed, "You...you don't want to divorce Li Zhen, do you?"

Xiaoying sobbed violently instead, "It is impossible for me to divorce him, you know, Li Zhen...we still have Xiaozhi."

Guo Jia was dumbfounded.

Xiaozhi occasionally heard his mother crying in the living room, and went out in doubt, and saw tears hanging on his mother's face, and her eyes were even more red, he was shocked, and asked timidly: "Mom, who Bullied you?"

Xiaoying saw herself in a state of embarrassment in her son's pure and innocent eyes, her confused thoughts gradually began to clear up, she wiped off the wetness on her cheeks, and hugged Xiaozhi vigorously, "Baby, mom is fine! "

Xiaozhi put his soft little arms around her neck and said softly: "Mom, Xiaozhi will listen to you from now on!"

Xiaoying held back her tears and nodded desperately. She felt guilty for losing control just now, and even completely forgot the existence of her son.

After a long sigh, Xiaoying stood up from the chair, "Guo Jia, I'm fine, don't worry about me, I feel much better now. I have to make dinner and talk to you next time. "

"Xiaoying!" Guo Jia called her in time, "Don't embarrass yourself too much."

"I know." Tears still remained on Xiaoying's face, but she managed to smile, "Thank you, Guo Jia, you are always willing to listen to my whining, I'm fine, really."

Guo Jia was holding her mobile phone, biting her lips and staring in a daze in the chair, Xiaoyu came out of the kitchen with her wet hands up, and walked directly to her, "Come on, roll up your sleeves for me quickly, press your Command, I'll wash all the dishes right away, let's see your handiwork—huh? What's your expression? Lost your soul?"

"I just called Xiaoying." Guo Jia lazily helped him fix his sleeves, "I wanted to find a chance to tell her about the two of us, but I didn't expect it, alas!"

Xiaoyu's eyes flickered with alertness, "Isn't she all right? What's wrong?"

Guo Jia then told all about Shen Juncheng's visit to Xiaoying, "I guess Li Zhenxin must be unhappy, and he is having a fight with Xiaoying! Think about it, according to Xiaoying's temper, she will say it's okay if she has something to do. After asking a few words, she actually cried, this must be a big deal!"

"Shen Juncheng went to look for my sister?" Xiaoyu frowned, "Who is this? It's been three years and he still doesn't give up?"

"That's all." Guo Jia glanced at him meaningfully, "What's terrible is that I don't think Xiaoying has forgotten him. These two people are really wronged in previous lives!"

Xiaoyu was so preoccupied after eating a meal that he didn't even feel the taste of the braised pork that he always liked very much.

When Guo Jia came out after cooking the bowl, he immediately asked, "Can you ask for leave recently? I want to visit my sister, and I haven't seen her for a long time."

Guo Jia understood that he was worried about Xiaoying, but in fact she was also very worried for Xiaoying, her choking voice on the phone was still in his ears.

"Okay, as long as you want to go, you can always ask for leave." She readily agreed, and then asked, "Can you get away?"

"I'm a freelancer, composing music, of course I have to go out often!" Xiaoyu said, tilting his head and lighting a cigarette, "Tell me when you have asked for leave tomorrow morning, and I will go to the office in the afternoon. Buy a ticket."

"Yeah. By the way... How can I tell Xiaoying about the two of us?" Guo Jia's expression suddenly twitched. She was always straightforward, but the fact that she was with Xiaoyu was so shocking, especially in Xiaoyu's case. In front of Ying, she couldn't imagine what Xiaoying's expression would be when she found out.

"Let's tell the truth!" Xiaoyu took a puff of cigarette, looked at her with a half-smile and said, "Just tell her honestly that you were stupid during the blind date and almost got taken advantage of by a pervert. The hero saves the beauty—oh, you are not considered a beauty, you should be called the "hero saves the girl" and saved you from the pervert!"

A ball of crumpled paper flew towards Xiaoyu, who was speaking enthusiastically. He barely blocked it with his hand, and continued with a smile, "I didn't expect that this hero is not only jealous, but also quite chivalrous." , Seeing that you have had countless blind dates but failed, I felt pity for you, so I took you in, this is considered a good person to the end, sending Buddha to the west!"

Another ball of paper flew over!
Just as Xiaoyu chopped it out halfway, Guo Jia himself rushed towards him like a locomotive!
"Wait, wait!" Xiaoyu laughed and ran away, "This sister is too impatient, thinking about that kind of thing before dark! No matter what, let me finish smoking this cigarette! "

He is more dexterous than Guo Jia, he can even jump up the window sill, Guo Jia can only gnash his teeth under the window with his hips on his hips, "If you have the ability, don't come down for the rest of your life!"

"Then I can't bear it!" Xiaoyu tilted his body, let go of his hands, and jumped steadily to Guo Jia. Then he stopped joking with her and hugged her hard, "Are you really angry? Come on, boo one!"

While being eaten by him, Guo Jia said bitterly: "In the next life, I will find someone younger than me, I'm not a fucking human!"

Xiaoyu giggled, "Let's live this life well before we talk about the next life, sister!"

When Guo Jia heard this, he couldn't hold back his anger anymore, and couldn't help laughing out loud.The embarrassment of having to confess to Xiaoying just now was immediately resolved.

Countless blind dates brought her embarrassment and discomfort, but it also made her understand the truth that finding someone to love for the rest of her life is more important than anything else.What's more, although Xiaoyu still didn't enter into the [-]-to-[-] routine like her, he has changed a lot for her-he quit the original chaotic circle, and he can have plenty of time for the people around him.

What Guo Jia saw was not only the changes in his life, but also his sincerity.

Xiaoying followed Fan Zhijun to his office, met many employees along the way, and nodded politely to them all.

After the news of Shen's project bidding was made public by Ke Lan, in this small company, almost everyone's eyes were on Fan Zhijun. However, everyone no longer dares to ignore him like in the past. Maybe one day he will hold a heavy army and regain power. Although no one can say whether this kind of thing will happen, but there is nothing wrong with being cautious. The possibility of this is too great.

After entering the door, Fan Zhijun didn't come with her, he stared at her solemnly and asked, "Is it because you have any worries right now that you want to be transferred?"

(End of this chapter)