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Chapter 1113 My soul is rotten

Chapter 1113 My soul is rotten
"I know very well that these are extremely negative emotions, but I can't control myself from having these terrible emotions."

While speaking, Gong Ran frowned slightly, as if he felt another uncontrollable pain in his finger joints.

It would always be like this, when his mood became a little anxious, his knuckles would ache.

That ants-like feeling has haunted him for a long time.

But he has been enduring, facing everyone with a normal attitude.

No one knew that he was already sick.

"These bad emotions will make me have a strong sense of powerlessness. Sometimes I feel that I am very tired to live, and even have thoughts of suicide."

When the members of the Qiao family planned to take revenge before, Gong Ran even thought that it would be good to die like this.

However, he was saved by Cheng Xiu who "accidentally" passed by.

"Can I ask you a question?"

The psychiatrist looked at Gong Ran calmly and asked quietly.

Gong Ran nodded lightly, "Yes, yes."

"Have you ever harmed yourself?" The psychiatrist said concisely.

Gong Ran's eyes drooped slightly, making it hard to see the expression in his eyes.

He was silent, pursed his thin lips lightly, and did not speak.

The atmosphere in the room also became silent.

After an unknown period of silence, he slowly raised his eyes to look at the psychiatrist.

The boy's eyes were still clean and clear, but inside seemed to be covered with a layer of intense sadness.

An oppressive sadness just to look into his eyes.

"I once thought about self-harm, even suicide, and I also picked up a knife and wanted to cut my wrist."

"I still fantasize that if this knife is cut off, all the love and hatred will disappear."

"It may hurt, but it doesn't really hurt. After all, the pressure will be released, and even thinking about the moment when the blood comes out, my mood will become very good."

"Do you think the idea of ​​me is terrible?"

The psychiatrist shook his head.

Gong Ran pursed her lips and smiled slightly, "Thank you, thank you for your kindness, but most people think that my thoughts are terrible and unreasonable."

"So, I struggled for a long time, and I didn't really harm myself, because I still care about other people's eyes and ideas after all."

After all, he is a person living under the sun, even though he feels that more than half of his life has been corroded by darkness.

But he didn't want to worry those around him.

Because of self-mutilation, it is easy to leave marks.

He would rather bear and endure all the pain by himself than want those around him to worry about him.

From the outside, he looks like a normal person.

In addition to becoming quieter and calmer, it seems to be the same Gongran as before.

But in fact, during this period of time, he has been experiencing the pain of being bitten by ants.

Only when I dream back at midnight, I cry alone and vent quietly.

His whole heart is heavy.

In fact, he has always wanted to find someone to confide in, but he is afraid that others will say that he is abnormal, and even think that he is hypocritical and unreasonable.

Therefore, he dared not speak.

Here at the psychiatrist, it was the first time he really opened up his heart.

In fact, Gong Ran's emotions have reached a state of overload, if he doesn't find someone to confide in, he may really collapse.

On this day, he couldn't help talking to the psychiatrist a lot.

For his situation, the psychiatrist also has a certain understanding and mastery.

Finally, Gong Ran said something impressive.

He said: "My soul is rotten now, my mind is turbid, my body has no body temperature, and my whole person is like a living shell."

(End of this chapter)

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