120 philosophical essays you must read in your life

Chapter 90

Chapter 5 Section 11 The Way of Friends

[China] Liang Shuming

The degree to which a friend believes is the depth of the relationship.If you don't be friends, it's enough. If you are friends, you have to be responsible for each other.The degree of friendship is the degree of responsibility.It is a great pity that friends do not end; it is the same shortcoming as the bad relationship between father and son, brothers, and husband and wife.When you make friends, you need to understand each other's natures, and do so in a profound and thorough way.If the level of belief is not enough, don't get too close.

The way of friends in China has always been to say "letter" as soon as you hear a friend.But the common so-called faith mostly means "keeping your word", that is, to have credit.It’s not bad to say this, but according to my experience, I think there is another very important point in communicating with friends. This point is also trust, but the way of saying it is different. It does not mean faithfulness, but that friends must be trustworthy. A friend who can trust the so-called confidant is a friend who can trust each other.I understand his character, his wisdom and emotion, his disposition and temper.After knowing this person, I feel confident in my heart that he will be home.Among friends, the most important thing is to know each other; knowing each other means understanding each other.A one-sided relationship is not a friend, it must be a two-sided relationship in order to have a good relationship, because without a good relationship, you cannot know each other.If you have feelings for each other and understand each other, then you are friends.Once a friend is established, no matter how far apart in space or how long in time, I know for sure that he will not deviate from him, and this can be called trust.

【Together with you】

Choosing a career, choosing a spouse, and choosing friends are the three most important things in life. Whoever is not careful will swallow the bitter fruit he has planted.

Friends are always heart-to-heart and sincere.

Friends, always know yourself and others, and treat each other honestly.

Only sincerity can make friends.

Only trust can make the tree of friendship evergreen.Being able to solve problems and solve problems is always precious.

There is an openness that cannot be said to others, and there is a candid communication that talks about everything.

The way to make friends leaves the premise of being open and aboveboard. The closer you are, the more you will deviate from the correct track.

To make friends, you must treat each other with sincerity, and you must be open and aboveboard.

Knowing people and making friends, choosing the good and following them, is the core of making friends.

Talking to you is better than reading ten years of books.

Following a wrong idea can lead to lifelong regret.

Friendship is more important than principle.

A combination without principles will eventually lose sympathy.

Plant a tree of friendship and reap sweetness.

Using friendship as a cover can only cultivate bitter fruit.

If you want to use others, you will be used by others.

If it is used ignorantly, it will be ridiculed by the user.

Know people to choose good.

Only then can you make friends.

Conversation must resort to reasoning in poetry, political discourse, history, and philosophy, for without these no topic of conversation would be suitable for the discourse of rational men.

(End of this chapter)