The Edge of Love and Pain: My Double Husband

Chapter 154 Rarely Confused
I didn't continue to stop him, not because I was interested in this passage, but because I felt that this must be the first time he opened his mouth and tried to tell someone.Not long ago, the doctor also said that he should talk more, and although he talked a lot, he never touched the key points related to himself, so he is actually an introverted person.Refusing to talk about his troubles is also one of the reasons for aggravating his condition.

"She did give birth to a child for me." Before saying this, he was silent for a long time: "But that child has long since died."

I dare not speak for fear of alarming him.

"The reason why I have such a big reaction to Niannian is because...their situation is exactly the same." He said it with great difficulty: "I don't remember what happened at that time and what it was like. Only Amelie told me that I strangled her."

"Did you see the dead body?" This is something that Fan's father has never understood.

"I don't remember, but I think I must have seen it." He said desolately: "During that time, my thinking was always chaotic, and there was always a force disrupting all my perceptions. My thinking often fell into broken chains, Waking up all of a sudden, blacking out all of a sudden, and even being in a total trance for a period of time I don't know how long. I knew I must have done something crazy in that trance, but I didn't know that I What have you done."

His description is very similar to the previous days.

"Later, my condition stabilized for the time being, so I talked about it with Amelie again. I wanted to see the child's body and give her a funeral." Every sentence of his would pause for a long time, and it was obviously extremely difficult to say: "But she told me..."

He fell silent suddenly.

I quickly groped and hugged his waist, because I felt his body was shaking violently.

He didn't continue talking for a long time, so I said: "Don't think about it if you feel uncomfortable, you..."

"Don't talk." He ordered softly, "Let me finish."

I had to be silent with worry.

After a long time, he spoke again: "She said that after I strangled the child to death, I dismembered her. Because it looked terrible, my father burned the body. I want to ask my father, but... I'm afraid What she said was true. For a long time after that, I was struggling with this matter..."

I was shocked.

If it was before I saw that scene with my own eyes, I would have no hesitation in thinking that Amelie was lying.But I actually saw him dismember that body.

"I can hear crying every day, and sometimes I suddenly see her crawling towards me, stitched all over her body, dripping blood from her joints. She also calls me daddy, and when she grins, her jaw will fall off." His voice was soft, and his tone was also unusually trance: "I feel very distressed and scared, I..."

His body began to tremble violently, I hugged him tightly and said, "Don't think about it, Yinyin, really don't..."

"It's not that I want to." His voice also began to tremble: "It's because it started to appear again recently, I had forgotten about it, I..."

"I'm sorry." I really want to know his expression now, but I can't see it, which makes me feel very anxious. I want him to speak out, but I'm afraid that his spirit will be more painful.There was nothing I could do but keep stroking his back, hoping it would make him feel better.

I even wondered, why did we suddenly start talking about this kind of topic?What were we talking about?I was so flustered that my mind was in such a mess that I couldn't think of anything.

He didn't speak for a long time, and I could feel his heart beating in an unusually violent rhythm.He must be very scared. I imagined that scene, and replaced that child with Nian Nian. It must be not only fear, but also remorse, distress, panic...etc.

After a long time like this, his heartbeat finally stabilized slowly, and he didn't say anything, he just pulled my arm away and held my hand, and I heard him light a cigarette again.

I'm going to change a happy topic: "Niannian recently..."

"I know," he said. "Don't go on, I know."

"So don't be afraid, I'm sorry, I lied to you so much before." So the reason why he got so angry was because he was afraid that we would lie to him, that he would kill Nian Nian himself and dismember her?Still afraid that we will lie to him?Sometimes I really don't understand him. Since I'm so afraid, why do I have to know?
"It's okay." He said, "I don't want to blame you for this, but I think that since I want you to help me communicate with him, then I should tell you more. What else do you want to ask?"

"I……"

I have, but I dare not ask.

He was silent for a while, then pulled me to the nearest bench, sat down, and said after a while, "Amelie was also strangled to death by me."

"Is this what you remember?"

"Her father said it." He said: "Her father is a very good person, and he would not give me such a label easily."

"Maybe the second personality did it."

"I don't know, maybe it's me." He whispered: "I also felt in a trance, neither asleep nor awake. When I was fully awake, I found that I had been tied up and she was dead."

"Oh." I said, "I have a question, but I'm afraid you'll say I'm naive."

"Go ahead."

"She's gone, you're sad, is it because you love her, or because you feel sorry for her?"

"It's really childish." His voice seemed to be a little more relaxed than before.

"It's fine if you don't want to answer."

"Her family is just ordinary people, and her parents are office workers. Without me, her life would be the same as her parents, very ordinary, married to an ordinary person, but he must be healthy. But she has always been with me, a mentally ill Beside her, she gave birth to a child for me, but instead of marrying her, I killed her child and killed her." He said, "Maybe I don't love her very much, but I think I can't help her."

I admit, compared to those big things, I am most concerned about these childish little things: "If you could turn back time, would you quarrel with your father and marry her?"

"meeting."

"Oh." I was a little disappointed: "Then why didn't you marry her then?"

"Because I didn't know she was going to die."

My disappointment turned to fear.

He asked, "What's wrong?"

"Did you not stop him from marrying me because you knew I was going to die?"

"Didn't I tell you earlier?" His tone was relaxed: "I want to kill you."

"Just to break him down?"

"What else?" He said, "He killed my woman and my child, and I almost collapsed because of it. I think he is younger than me, so he must not be as strong as me, so I also killed him. Wife, killed his child. Even if I didn't make him disappear because of it, I at least took revenge."

"But I'm innocent."

"Who made you lose your mind, don't stay at home obediently, wait for your father to introduce Pu Lan to you, you want to go to this kind of place, and find a stupid idiot who has no skills, no money, and is stupid?" He said disdainfully: "Is marriage a child's play? You didn't even meet his parents before you got married. If my father was like my third uncle, you might be slept by your father-in-law."

"But he was good to me." I said, "It's you who is bad."

He laughed.

"what's wrong?"

"I'm really good to you. How can you be willing to be with you when you know that I won't tolerate you? How can you be willing to put the woman you love the most in such a situation that is doomed to death?" His tone Wei Leng: "Lingling, maybe this kind of words will look disgusting when I say it from my mouth. But the truth is that when you really love someone, you will try to keep her away from risks, keep her safe, and keep her from harm .If it is a risk brought by yourself, then you should let her go in time, and don't force her into your own dangerous life. This is the most basic, and only those who can do these are qualified to pursue more advanced things' Be nice to her'."

I didn't speak.

He too fell silent.

I worked up my courage for a long time before I made up my mind. I held his hand and asked, "Have you thought about keeping me out of danger, keeping me safe and safe from harm?"

He was silent.

"There was once, right?" The time he wanted to commit suicide, he said he left all the money to me.At that time, I didn't think there was anything wrong, but when I heard him say that today, I was suddenly moved by a little disappointment.

"I said it just now," he said. "You didn't listen carefully."

"Speak more carefully."

He took out the hand I was holding, and started to light a cigarette again: "In my heart, a lover and a wife are completely different."

"It's different in everyone's heart."

"The woman I married, whether I love her or not, I have a contract with her. After I have a child, I have responsibilities to her and to the child. It's not like a lover. I only need to be responsible to the child. I have a responsibility, and I don’t need her.” He said: “Because my wife is a member of my family, just like my parents and children, not just for sex and relaxation. I admit that with you, I have many places Not like a husband. But for the identity of a wife, I look at it this way. So, I need my wife to think the same as me. If I die, my parents are old, and the child has not grown up, she will You must be conscious and capable of taking care of the family. Therefore, the division of inheritance is not based on my feelings, but on your identity."

"Then don't you think I don't have that ability?"

"That can't be helped." He said, "It's too late to marry another one."

"Then you should have thought about it in the first place, not allowing him to marry me." I just wanted to expose him.

"At the beginning, I planned to kill when I got tired of playing." He said: "Anyway, there is no suitable marriage partner."

"Then why am I still sitting here?"

"If you have a child, it's better for the child to be with his mother." He responded very naturally.

"I didn't want to have a baby at first, but you didn't allow me to take medicine." I said, "Now it's like an unwanted pregnancy."

He laughed and put his arms around my shoulders: "Little friend, it's not a good habit to ask the bottom line, it's rare to be confused."

(End of this chapter)