leave this sad place

Chapter 138 Communication

The familiar classroom, the classroom that I have lived in for almost a year.But there is still no feeling of kindness.

A trace of worry arose in Ouyang's heart, and he took another deep breath, trying to control himself, not wanting others to see any strangeness in him.He walked, walking as usual, but the pain became deeper.

He returned to his position silently, like a wanderer in the dark night wandering under the vast moonlight, there was no whining of the wind around, only the silence of the night.He also sat silently in his own seat, the one on the far right of the last row in the classroom.

None of the classmates cast a staring gaze, and he also tried his best to control himself, letting his gaze look at his feet, as if there was something beautiful there.But he knew, he knew very well that there were only marble and patterns on the marble.

The trace of worry in his heart has long since vanished, and what emerges is another kind of melancholy.In this place, up to now, he has only loneliness and loneliness.

"It's because I think too much." He shook his head, his eyes dimmed.It's like dressing up carefully and appearing in front of everyone. I thought it would attract people's attention, but I didn't expect it to be as usual.Such a normal gaze can easily prick a sensitive heart.

A bell rang, and those who wanted to chat were chatting, those who wanted to read were reading, and those who should do their homework were doing their homework.The bustling classroom and the bustling surroundings seemed to suddenly quiet down when Ouyang closed his eyes.Because everything about them, everything about them has nothing to do with Ouyang.

He felt his heart tremble, and even his eyelashes trembled slightly.He opened his eyes and looked around with a complicated expression.Everything around is still not the slightest change, those who should study are learning, those who want to have fun are having fun, clear words, joyful laughter, Yiyi poured into her ears.But Ouyang's heart is lonely, a kind of loneliness that shuttles through the vast crowds and traffic; a kind of loneliness that no one understands him; a kind of loneliness that seems to be that he doesn't belong to this world at all.

He didn't know why he felt such emotion at this time, as if he didn't know why he caught a bad cold when he was about to take the exam.His eyes dimmed even more, too many emotions would make his heart more haggard.

"Don't think about it anymore." He shook his head again, his hoarse and indifferent voice revealed a kind of deep exhaustion.He had already said countless times like this, and he was tired of talking, but he had to continue.Just like that life, as long as you are still alive, no matter how hard or tired you have to go on, without stopping.

As night fell, a large black cloth wrapped the entire world.Is it another form of protection, or another form of murder?

Ouyang stood in front of the window and looked at the starry sky as usual.People in ancient times entrusted love to the moon, but what about him?Even if you are missing, who should you be thinking about?If it is said to be thinking, what kind of problem is it thinking about night and night?

He closed his eyes, trying to hide the tiredness in his eyes, but there was still a breath of tiredness in his heart, which made him look very depressed.

"This day—" he read without saying the second half of the sentence, and he didn't want to say it.On such a day, he almost couldn't bear the turbulent changes in his emotions. It's best not to mention those shocking things.

"But—" He sighed and opened his eyes, but they were all gloomy.His thoughts were a little ups and downs again, like a wave rising up again after a wave has not calmed down.

He looked at the starry sky outside the window again, and subconsciously clenched his fists, as if to give himself courage.

He firmly remembered the decision he made during the day today, some things could no longer be escaped, and some things had already reached the time for them to be resolved.

There was a stabbing pain in his heart, and what was uncovered was not only the dusty memory, but also a scar, the innermost scar engraved in his heart, a scar that would bleed with a slight touch.

He stood silently, speechless for a long time, but his heart was beating against the shore like an angry sea—the barrier of his soul.The pain in his eyes deepened. Although some things have been fully prepared, when it really comes, he will be shocked to find that the preparations he made before are still far from enough.

He calmed down his state of mind, and suppressed the pain again and again, just like gouging out the poisoned rotten meat to prevent the spread of the poison.This requires not only a kind of courage, but also a kind of courage.

The remaining warmth brought by the sun during the day gradually dissipated, and a kind of coldness bred from the darkness gradually diffused.

He knew that it was time for him to carry out his decision, otherwise he would have to wait until tomorrow, and what unexpected things would happen tomorrow was something he couldn't predict, and he couldn't bear it.Because I don't know how many times that fragile heart can withstand blows.

"Du-doo--" He took out his mobile phone and dialed a familiar but unfamiliar number.But suddenly found that this was actually the first time he called his mother.

His expression was a little sad, a little sad.He avoided them, but made the people closest to him worse than strangers.His heart ached a little again, and his eyes were a little confused again.He felt that he was born a mistake, a living mistake, and he had to continue to be wrong!

why?Who really did this?

Why pain?Who is really giving this?
"Beep—beep—" the phone rang unhurriedly, as if an old man had taken everything in this world lightly.He felt a little nervous in his heart, and became a little contradictory.He didn't want to call anymore, he was afraid to talk to her, and it wasn't the time to talk.

But his hands were stiff, holding the phone stiffly, forcing himself to face it stiffly.Some problems really should be solved, and it is really time to face them.But he was used to escaping, used to burying himself in a space where he couldn't see anything like an ostrich, and mistakenly thought that he would no longer feel afraid.

"Hello," her voice came from the phone, and his hands gripped the phone so tightly that his knuckles turned white.But he didn't open his mouth to speak, just like answering her phone when he was a child, he held her tightly like this, neither letting go nor opening his mouth.

"Son, what's the matter with you?" Her words came from his ear, she asked him, but the words he had thought for a long time just disappeared in smoke.His face was as pale as a piece of white paper, and also like the face of a ghost floating in the dark night.He couldn't remember, and he didn't know what to say.A tear trickled down the corner of his eye.

"Hey, son, what's the matter with you?" She asked him, and her voice seemed to have changed, as if with a hint of concern, but it was so far away.

"It's okay." He took a deep breath and tried his best to control his voice so that there was no hint of hoarseness in it, but it became even deeper.He calmed down the turbulent emotions in his heart.

"What's wrong with your voice? Did you catch a cold? Did you go to the hospital? Did you buy any medicine?..." Hearing her concern, such a surge of concern imposed on him by the brain, It made his heart unbearable.Because he is not used to these anymore, a long, long time ago, he has been used to the feeling that no one cares about his heart, and no one comes to comfort his life when he is uncomfortable.

"It's okay, I'm calling—" He forcefully interrupted her rambling, and finally summoned up the courage to speak out what was in his heart.

"Don't be afraid to spend money in the hospital. Not only is it not an option, but it will also affect your studies." She still said with concern.

"I'm calling to talk to you—about me, you, and that person." His voice became even deeper.

And she was silent.

(End of this chapter)