Men love such a woman: 12 lessons a happy woman must take

Chapter 2 The secular reality, women are only "vulgar" to look real and cute (1)
There's nothing wrong with being a little "worldly" for a woman who has happiness and joy!Indeed, who can be an innocent girl all her life and not become an ordinary person as she grows old.What about dying in the world?Since this will be the case sooner or later, why not learn the mundane earlier and see the reality clearly?In this way, it may be possible to live gracefully as the years pass by.

Don't let those inappropriate ideas lock up your happiness

Everyone longs for happiness, although happiness is a feeling and an attitude towards life.However, no matter what, we are living in reality, not in illusion.Regrettably, some women who live in reality are bound by some unrealistic requirements and standards.Think that as a woman, you must be gentle and submissive, and even think that when a man asks her to do something, she must "do it unconditionally".They think this way because they firmly believe that only in this way can they become a good woman praised by people and have happiness.

It is a pity that countless facts tell us that this is not the case, and countless literary and artistic works are also conveying such information to us.For example, Qin Xianglian, the heroine in the well-known Peking opera "The Case of Guillotine Beauty", and Jin Yunu in "Jin Yu Nu Beats the Lover" recorded in Feng Menglong and Ling Mengchu's "San Yan Er Pai", which one of them Doesn't meet what people think of as a good woman?And do they really have happiness?
These are the stories in ancient works of art, which seem to be a little far away from the era we live in today, and seem to lack certain convincing power.When we take a closer look around us, we will find that stories like the one above are happening all the time.

Axia is such a good woman praised by others, but also a hard-working woman.About 8 years ago, she met his ex-husband.At that time, her ex-husband was still a skilled worker in a state-owned enterprise, but she was one of the few college students in the company at that time, working as a technician in the best technical department of the company.When they first started dating, many people persuaded Axia, saying that they were not compatible, and they would definitely not be happy in the future.

However, Axia believed in her choice, and still came together with him, and sacrificed everything to support him silently, because she felt that she loved this man deeply, so she should give everything for this man.

He was also very upbeat, and followed Axia to make up for his lack of theoretical knowledge. When he had a certain ability, he discussed with Axia to resign and go out to make a living.Axia agreed.At this time, they already had a child, and the old mother of the ex-husband was getting worse day by day.

From then on, Axia took the responsibility of the whole family on her shoulders and let her beloved man work hard to realize her ideal.The man who left the factory finally made a career and established his own business in a certain city in the south.Axia is happy for her man's achievements and feels that her efforts are worthwhile.But.Unexpectedly, the man proposed a divorce to her.

Axia's heart was crying.She really didn't know what she did wrong.

I'm afraid, no one will say that Axia is not a good woman, but what about her fate?Some people may accuse that man of being too heartless and a bad man.Here, we are not going to comment on that man. If we look at similar things from another angle, we may find that their misery is sometimes caused by themselves, and the root cause lies in those outdated concepts.As a woman, if you want to have the happiness you desire, you must break the outdated concept of "good woman", because those concepts, requirements and standards will make women bury themselves.Let women become the appendages of society and men; it will make women lose their individuality and true thoughts deep in their hearts, so that the happiness that some women hope to have is completely derived from the giving of others, which is a passive state happiness.Think about it, would a woman like this really be happy?

Perhaps, you think that as a woman, you should be like Axia, and women should be docile.You may also think that if you don't do this as a woman, you are not a good woman, maybe a little bit bad.But as a woman, what you need to know is that happiness is not given by others, but you have to find it yourself.In today's society where men and women are equal, women should not be bound by those outdated requirements and standards, but should bravely live out themselves and pursue a happy life according to their own ideas.Because only you know whether you are happy or not; only you know whether you are happy or not, just like the dialogue between Zhuangzi and Shi Hui watching fish on the bridge:

Zhuangzi: Fish are happy in water!

Shi Hui: You are not a fish, how do you know if a fish is happy or not!

Zhuangzi: You are not me, so how do you know that I don't know whether the fish is happy or not?Women who long for happiness and happiness, please remember: you are the master of your happiness and happiness.Strive for the most reasonable treatment and the most suitable position.Moreover, you should not abandon men and love like a workaholic, love rationally, do not rely on love, but fully enjoy the sweetness it brings; do not control emotions, but guide them to a beautiful destination.In this way, men get close to her, but dare not insult her.

You can be virtuous, but never destroy yourself
A female painter once mentioned such a thing in a talk show on CCTV: She had a beautiful and gentle high school classmate who married a small official of the local tax bureau after graduating from high school.Not long ago, when she went home to visit relatives, she happened to meet this classmate. Surprisingly, the beautiful girl who was beautiful and pleasant back then has now become a bloated and vulgar woman.The female painter said that this classmate looked like a "sea-haired creature", and the swelling of her body made her look clumsy and dull, if she hadn't said hello first.I would never recognize her as the school belle of "All the stars hold the moon".Every girl has a romantic and magnificent dream when she is young. She hopes to have a graceful figure and a delicate face like the heroine in Qiong Yao's play, and she can hold her lover's affectionate and masculine neck with her gentle arms, lingering and lingering. love each other forever.How poetic it all is!Women should have continued this dream, but unfortunately many women have abandoned it in their hurried lives.

In real life, the vast majority of women, especially many women who are obsessed with "dairy, rice, oil and salt" after marriage, I am afraid that few people will think about the huge contrast before and after marriage: Why have I lost the innocence of the past?Why do you no longer have the feelings of admiring the flowers and singing the moon?

Tracing along this line of thought, we have come to the conclusion that most women spend their lives following the traditional thinking line of "male dominates the outside and women dominates the inside" after marriage.Once they get married, they will consciously devote most of their energy to the family, and gradually give up their original dreams and enterprising spirit.Traditional women rely on being "virtuous" to win people's praise, while modern women are keeping the precepts of "virtuous" to bury their splendor.

If it is said that traditional women can maintain a stable and stable home by sticking to the "virtuous", the situation may not be so optimistic if modern women stick to the "virtuous".

If a woman voluntarily gives up the pursuit of career and self-improvement and is satisfied with the life inside and outside the house, if she is willing to be the "great woman" behind the man, one day the wind and dust of the years will overwhelm her former aura and tedious housework. Her nobility will be smoothed out, and her youth will be eclipsed by the day-to-day toil.When the heart and appearance gradually fade away, the man's original love for him may no longer be, how can their lives continue?

There is such a woman, who was a famous beauty in college at that time, with outstanding abilities.Her husband "stalked and stalked", "passed five levels and killed six generals", and finally chased her, and the two have been in pairs ever since.Her boyfriend takes good care of her.The two later got married.After marriage, she took on all the housework in the family and supported her husband's career wholeheartedly.Once she found out she was pregnant unexpectedly.In order not to affect her husband's career, she went to the hospital alone for an abortion.As a result, due to her excessive weakness, she passed out in the corridor of the hospital.

More than ten years have passed, and her husband's career is getting better and better. At the age of 35, he became an executive of a well-known domestic company.She thought it was all right now, her hard work was not in vain, and it was time to spare some time for her hobbies.Just when she was "satisfied", her husband asked for a divorce, saying that he no longer loved her.

She washed her face with tears all day long, and even had the intention of dying.She worked so hard to manage this family never for the beauty of "husband and wife are expensive", she just wanted to let him know how much she loves him, and let him be satisfied because he got this good woman.She was so desperate for him, how could he be so heartless?

This is the portrayal of some women's "blood and tears" in modern society.Looking at the high divorce rate today, many of these women are "good women" who work hard and work hard.In the past years, they not only had to "maintain the internal affairs" but also "participated in the external affairs". They also had to work and take care of the family, and they used all their hard-earned wages to subsidize their families without reservation.They are under double pressure from inside and outside, and they work day after day, but they can't get the man's heartfelt touch. All their sacrifices are purely "natural" in the eyes of men!
After they "abandoned their wives and children", they were still able to argue with peace of mind: "How much do you think you have done, and the things you do every day, I will pay for a babysitter; How much is the washing machine and rice cooker? I spent 1000 yuan to buy a washing machine. It can last me for 10 years!"

This is the positive result of "Xianhui"'s lifelong cultivation!Virtue was once praised as a "virtue", but how many people know how to appreciate this virtue?How many people know how to cherish this virtue?
This is not to say that "virtuous" is not good, but that in this ever-changing and tempting society, women are not as good as "bad", learn to think for themselves, and let go of their hands and feet instead of working hard to get a heartbroken ending Create your own wonderful.In fact, whether it is love or a good woman in marriage, the end is almost always in tears.And it is those bad women who make men love to death, for example, self-willed, selfish... because this is in line with the most primitive characteristics of men-conquer.

Yes, good women usually follow the rules, always put on a dignified, noble and inviolable appearance, just like plain water, men only strongly demand and miss it when they are thirsty.And the villain is like a very seductive cocktail, not only the color is gorgeous, but the entrance is also different.And the latter is especially alluring to men.

"Secularity" is not vulgarity, but the wisdom of life

As mentioned above, happiness and happiness are based on reality, not fantasy.Those women who seem a bit "bad" may be more worldly than those innocent "good" women because they clearly understand this point!
Indeed, if you associate "worldliness" with a certain woman, most people will reflexively think that it is a "bad" woman.Still, there's nothing wrong with being a little "worldly" for a woman who has happiness and joy!Indeed, who can be an innocent girl all her life, and not become an ordinary person as she ages, and die in the world.Since it will be like this sooner or later, why not learn the world and make friends with money earlier?In this way, it may be possible to live gracefully when the years pass by.

Of course, this is not to say that only by becoming secular can we have a good life, but that if we can get rid of the obsession with money and reality, we will not have to live a life of exhaustion for money when we grow old.

As a woman, what choice would you make?
Yuqi and Linlin were classmates in college.In Yuqi's eyes, Linlin is simply a hopeless person.She doesn't even know who Nietzsche is, she only knows to read economic news and fashion magazines every day; she never participates in club activities that most college students are passionate about.For Yuqi, who studies hard and actively participates in club activities, Linlin is an extremely philistine woman.

One day, Yuqi finally couldn't help but scold Linlin face to face: "What are you thinking about every day? You only pay attention to the economy and fashion, and if you don't do something useful, your head is like an empty shell."

Facing Yuqi's harsh interrogation, Linlin asked Chi with a puzzled expression: "What's wrong with me? Then what are you thinking? Are your thoughts useful?"

"Although I don't have a particularly great goal, at least I don't have no ideas like you. As a college student, you must have a sense of responsibility to society!"

Linlin left a sentence for the impassioned Yuqi and turned away: "I really don't know what contribution you can make to the society now? How can a person who can't even support himself be responsible for the society? Really!"

Even though Linlin had thousands of words in her heart, enough to refute Linlin's point of view, but facing Linlin's back, she only said one sentence: "Ordinary!"

Ten years later, by chance, Yuqi met Linlin.

After graduation, Yuqi couldn't find a suitable job, so she had to stay at her sister's house.Due to too much pressure in life.Not only did his skin become rough, but his figure also began to gain weight, making him look very down and out.Linlin, who has always paid attention to her own management, has accumulated rich work experience and won the favor of a foreign company.And also married a wealthy engineer, living a very comfortable life.

One day, Yuqi went out to the bakery to buy bread, and happened to meet Linlin. "Oh, what a coincidence! How was life after graduation?"

Yuqi found out.Linlin looked the same as before, or rather, the radiant, happy expression made her look even more beautiful.

"Why do you buy so much bread?" Yuqi asked.

"There is an orphanage nearby. I bought food for those children. There is nothing I can do to help. I just buy some food occasionally to visit them."

Yuqi, who is tired of life now, sees the shadow of herself in college in Linlin.However, after graduating, I have difficulty in getting enough food and clothing. How can I have the ability to fulfill my responsibilities for the society? My ideals and reality are getting farther and farther away.But now Linlin can eat and drink to her heart's content only with the money earned by her husband.Such a big gap.Yuqi was hit hard.

It can be seen that becoming a realistic and secular person does not mean giving up one's dreams and waiting for the pie to fall from the sky; it is not what we call vulgarity, but a kind of wisdom in life.When a woman truly understands the meaning of secularism, then she can better grasp the reality, not only will not worry about the problem of food and clothing, but also live more independent and confident because of a certain economic foundation.

Although secular women value money a bit.It's like a "gold digger", a little bit "bad", but what's wrong with it like this?With a certain economic foundation, isn't it possible to dress yourself up more beautifully?With a certain economic foundation, isn't it a certain degree of independence?

Think about it, which man doesn't like beautiful women; and which man really likes a woman who has no independence and is too dependent?
Women, from today on, be more secular!Secularity is not vulgarity, but a kind of wisdom in life.Although it makes you look a little "bad", but this "bad" will add style to you.

Bad women are endearing.Absolutely a motto for women to keep in mind for life

For a long time, in a society dominated by men, they have given too many demands to women.In many cases, these requirements are set up by men out of self-protection.When women's words and deeds do not conform to their requirements, they are regarded as bad women.

However, here to remind female friends, do not believe these standards and requirements of men.What you need to know is that most of the time men are duplicity.Although they have always asked women to act according to those standards and requirements, deep down, they are very fascinated by women who dare to challenge these requirements and standards.Isn't there such a saying: "Women are not bad and men don't love"?

For a woman, if she wants to have real happiness and joy, and become a woman loved and fascinated by men, she must not be confused by the standards and requirements of men's words, and occasionally challenge the standards and requirements set by men. "It doesn't matter at all.

Those "bad" women in reality have a certain understanding of men's psychology, and are good at grasping men's psychological weaknesses and grasping the degree of communication with men.

A certain office girl, Mayfair, is such a girl who fascinates men.She is dressed in a fashionable and fashionable dress, and she gets along well with both male and female colleagues. All you can see on her face is a bright and charming smile.Coupled with the fact that she is more beautiful, it is inevitable that some male colleagues will be full of fantasies about her, and some men will chase her after her.

The relationship between a man and a woman is the most delicate thing, and it is also the most difficult thing to deal with. If it is not handled properly, it will make each other extremely awkward, and even normal communication will be difficult to continue.However, Mayfair does not have such troubles. This fascinating "bad" girl always eliminates this embarrassment skillfully.

For example, once, a man who had long admired Fei'er asked Fei'er out, intending to express his love to Fei'er.Mayfair really didn't have any feelings for that man. Normally, Mayfair noticed this when she received the man's invitation.I guessed what the man meant.

(End of this chapter)