Honkai Impact 3rd, a simulator of lifelong regret!

The accumulation of cold air and the refraction of sunlight—factors that are insignificant to a Herrscher—are enough to make a monster who theoretically doesn't need to sleep at all, but still feels like a human, open his eyes.

In the instant of awakening, in the most confused moment, the dazed look in his dark blue pupils formed a prism-like shape, like a laser beam surrounding a black hole.

Although it only lasted for a second, the illusion completely dissipated, and the light emanating from her eyes and hair, like that of a lanternfish, was once again covered in dust.

The only pity is that when reason returned, the expression that remained was neither joyful nor relaxed.

—It's confusion.

—It's confusion.

……

"what?"

Why did I have another nightmare?

"Hasn't that already satisfied all the regrets?"

"Now I really don't have much of an obsession left. Why did I still see Alicia and Velvi last night? And what I saw was even more outrageous. After they finished fighting, it even seemed like they wanted to come looking for me."

Jiang Cheng tried his best to piece together the fragments of last night's dream, his fingers unconsciously covering his head—there was no pain, but the chaotic thoughts and nonsensical information and images that existed here were more troublesome than pain.

At least the pain can be relieved, just like most of the time, except for some terminal illnesses, psychological problems are often more difficult to deal with than physical problems.

Physiological illnesses can be treated by finding the cause and then performing surgery. At worst, it may require a lot of medication or the surgery may be more difficult.

The psychological aspect stems from the inability to remedy past regrets or unforeseen problems. In such cases, medication merely makes the sick person appear less harmful, or at least more like a normal person, thus reassuring others.

Weight gain, cognitive decline, drowsiness... these are all side effects of those drugs, and long-term use can be more painful than the disease itself.

……

"That simulation lasted for so many years, was it really that important, so important that I would still be thinking about it for more than half a month after it ended?"

I can't understand it, or rather, I'm a little afraid to understand it for the first time.

It wasn't because of conflicts in her feelings for Alicia or Velvi that she was afraid; it was because of her fundamental fear of the side effects of the simulation.

If every simulation produces such a large impact, will a long buffer period be needed after each simulation in the future?

Without a buffer, if one simulates many times in one go, will the excessive amount of information and the superposition of multiple life experiences lead to an inability to correctly understand oneself, or will one fall into a state of self-isolation due to a large number of regrets?

If every simulation is a pre-civilization scenario, then no matter how hard we try, we will never be able to overcome the collapse, and all we will ultimately face is despair.

If someone witnesses too many disasters and personally experiences too many life-and-death separations, whether they will become withdrawn is a question no one can answer.

If one becomes like Velvi, even if one is equally lucky... at least relatively lucky, unlike the original storyline where the spiral had already split itself apart and fallen into a deep sleep, almost like a dead spiral.

If you really encounter another 'self' who can offer salvation and rescue you from a state of self-isolation, can you truly call it healthy if everything in life depends on that one person's state?

Do not……

That would only be a path to self-destruction.

Jiang Cheng shook his head without hesitation. His drooping eyebrows gave the answer in an instant. This was based on his personal experience over several years or even decades, on clear memories, and even on memories that could be stored in his body.

This is not just an isolated case, because even Alicia after her resurrection can be included in this category, as a completely withdrawn fairy who needs to be saved.

In this world, apart from professionals... perhaps most professionals don't know as much about this particular area as I do.

Especially in terms of rescue.

Especially the connection.

Especially the feeling after being captured by that gravity.

The meaning of life, the value of life, and even life itself—everything that transcends life exists solely for the sake of one person.

Even if there were only the slightest possibility of finding another way to solve the problem, being reduced to this state would be the most tragic and humiliating thing imaginable.

Moreover, this is a burden for both parties. If it weren't for the fact that I am also a lazy bum, with almost no ideals, no plans, no obsessions, and no things to accomplish, I would be a good person who just gives up.

Any normal person with their own plans would find it unacceptable to be held back by others, to be trapped by endless gravity, and to live forever.

Because people are unpredictable, and ideals and love are subject to change, who in this world can accept that their life becomes certain in some aspect?

……

"Huh...ha..."

The boy remained silent, making his first attempt to communicate with fragments of his memory, breathing in a way that might have lost its meaning, while his right hand casually tidied his hair, which had been blown too wildly by the wind, back into a mess.

It wasn't just for simulation; it was also for self-preservation.

If we only focus on ourselves with our current power, we could actually survive until the end, and maybe even go to Mars for a second playthrough.

This is also so that when I'm with Raiden Mei, I won't think about anyone else and there's no possibility of hurting her. Furthermore, if I want to protect the people around me, I need to conduct more simulations.

Our current strength is still too weak.

Transforming into a Herrscher is a move that kills a thousand enemies but also inflicts thirty thousand casualties on oneself.

If this move were actually used, then in the end either humanity would perish or he himself would die; it could only be used to deal with Otto by underhanded tactics.

This tactic is not worth using against any enemy in this world. Even Kevin could be persuaded, or at least have a chance to survive. If he surrenders quickly, he can still maintain his position as a leader in the world.

Only Otto, who would try to capture his family and friends, and even threaten innocent residents nearby if he realized the other party was a good person, might force the Herrscher to break down.

The best use of nuclear weapons is as a deterrent, because even those who clamor to use them are actually afraid of the consequences.

The simulation can't be stopped, so we have to find a way. We need to alleviate any potential psychological factors, at least to avoid becoming like Wilvie, to avoid reaching the level of despair that her former lover experienced.

This is not an exaggeration; it truly means that he can only be with Vilvi, and even the slightest distance from her would cause a tsunami.

You must have an absolute understanding of the other party, know the deeper meaning behind every seemingly strange action, and understand their somewhat eccentric behavior.

Knowing that the other person's avoidance is not because they hate them, but simply because of their inferiority complex, they take the initiative to reach out and offer warmth.

If you notice something is wrong with your emotions, try to resolve it instead of letting them build up. You can't be too lax in your daily life either.

We must not misinterpret the other person's emotions. Any slight mistake or any inappropriate temper could cause a young girl to die suddenly and silently, like a fragile little flower.

With her superhuman talent, Vilvi could live a very good life on her own, and all she would ask for from the outside world is affection and love.

Even if one can bear the weight of love and give their whole heart, they will still be limited by the disparity in their talents, which is almost like the difference between two species. This is enough to awaken dissatisfaction in anyone with even a hint of jealousy, because life is full of Versailles.

Girls often do things they think are easy, and for the complete spiral, they really are easy.

The difficulty for her might simply be raising her right hand, picking up a stone from the ground, or tearing an ordinary A4 sheet of paper in half.

But in the eyes of ordinary people, it is something that they could not achieve even a fraction of with all their might, and that person accomplished it as if they had simply taken a step forward and climbed a small hill, as simple as raising their right leg.

It's impossible to get even a fraction closer, impossible to even glimpse the limits of Vilvi's talent. The immense sense of disparity would likely be enough to cause any person with a modicum of backbone to suffer a mental breakdown.

Anyone with even a little jealousy will feel angry and envious; anyone with even a little backbone will feel the pain of having their bones ripped out.

Being a kept man requires qualifications. At the very least, one must know that they are being kept, be content with it, and not feel ashamed of it.

Only by recognizing oneself, knowing what one is capable of and what one should achieve, can one make mutual sacrifices, exchanging one's love for the girl's love, and exchanging one's inadequacy for the girl's utmost help.

It doesn't matter if my talent is exploited or I'm treated like a plaything, as long as my need for love is met and I can be saved from the darkness.

……

218. It seems like they're even a bit mentally ill.

too frightening.

Too dangerous.

Even if you know the other person is a bad person, even if you know there is a cliff in front of you, you will rush up without hesitation, and you may even feel warmth while falling, because you are doing it to help the person you love.

Even Jiang Cheng himself could only guarantee that he would do his best not to become a trap, and not to accidentally strangle Wilvi one day.

Every word and action is scrutinized, and even the occasional hobbies revealed are studied by the girls, who may even willingly become perverted members of the BDSM community.

Even if she wanted the stars, Vivi would find a way to pluck them down. No matter how inappropriate or unreasonable the request was, it would be unconditionally fulfilled. She would do everything in her power to satisfy her, no matter how much it cost.

This kind of personality... it's fortunate that Wilvi is a top genius, capable of doing most things in the world. Even if she is seriously injured, she can still come up with a medical procedure that is ahead of its time to fully revive herself while continuing to satisfy her perverse hobbies.

—Where did you come from?

The problem is that I just happened to see something, and like most ordinary people, I have a pure body and an abyss-like XP. At most, I'm just a little more knowledgeable. How did I end up being regarded as an enthusiast?

The problem is that I don't want to hurt the people I love, nor do I want to bring those perverse things that I only see to life on my loved ones.

The result was that no matter how she explained, Wilvi would take it as concern for her and treat her as if she were her, so she preferred to suppress her hobbies and interests.

While this was indeed part of the reason, it also made the girl even more determined to fulfill her wish, even advancing medical technology by hundreds of years, saying—no matter what I do, no matter how roughly I torture her body, I can instantly restore it to its original state, so please don't treat her with any gentleness or roughness.

It's true that even organs can be reconstructed. A person who is half-dead or even on the verge of death can be restored to full health in just two or three minutes by lying in it.

Before he could even explain or refuse, the entire ○ master knelt down and presented him with specially made tools for adjusting ○. If he didn't accept, Wilvi would remain in that position indefinitely.

Doesn't this also turn into nudity play?

Even at home, guests may come over.

For example, a very large snake, a snake that is stubborn but soft-hearted, or a snake that is high-attack but low-defense and would be stunned on the spot upon seeing this scene.

In the end, she will inevitably follow the path of pursuing her own interests. From the very beginning, Vilvi had planned everything. And without a doubt, the so-called medical technology was just a way for her to better agree to things, even if it didn't exist, even if it really would cause serious damage.

As long as it's something she considers her hobby, a young girl will not hesitate to risk her life, even if the reason seems ridiculous.

Perhaps for her, nothing is laughable as long as it concerns her; her own will and thoughts are infinitely more important than gods.

……

"I probably... shouldn't... have any chance of collapsing like that, right?"

The boy recalled his continuous hallucinations of Alicia and Velvi, which started to be relatively normal but became increasingly absurd, with images that could appear whether he was walking on the street or sleeping at night.

what……

I'm already a little scared.

If someone becomes truly withdrawn to this extent, then they have no hope of living. Whether it's the period of withdrawal or the period of being rescued, it's the same breakdown, unless there is a complete, normal version of Alicia that is not in any of the states before or after her resurrection that she encountered in the simulation.