I Really Don’t Want To Be A Calamity

lifts the head.

The young man suddenly found that the sky was obscured by a large shadow.

Ah.

That is the majestic pectoralis major.

Wait.

What the hell is the pectoralis major?

The young man shook his whole body, and raised his head in disbelief until his neck was so painful.

A face that can still distinguish the delicate and pretty facial features of a woman is stuck high on the "Iron Pagoda".

"!"

ka ka ka.

That is the sound of a sudden petrification.

……

Su Xiaosu's expression is dumb.

She has seen too many such reactions, too many.

Well, it's so called.

She silently took out the phone and turned to a photo that was clear enough to make her pores identifiable.

The picture shows a chubby face, his eyes are invisible, and the fat on his cheeks squeezes out the arc of happiness.

"Excuse me, have you ever seen this person? It may be a little thinner than in the photo, but the eyes must be right. There is only one slit left."

"Excuse me, have you seen him?"

Su Xiaosu tried his best to use the most gentle and elegant tone.

When going out, you must convince people with reason.

Whether it is physics or reason.

――It's all reason.

Youth shiver coldly.

My legs feel weak.

Su Xiaosu lowered his head, and the shadow coverage area increased a lot.

She repeated the question patiently: "Have you seen this flexible squinting fatty?"

"I,

I, I... "The young man's face was pale.

His lips trembled, but finally reacted.

"Mother! I want to go home--"

Turn around and run.

Su Xiaosu sighed.

Silently extend the hand, lifting up the innocent young man who was just about to turn around and run home.

The kind of two fingers holding the collar lightly.

"Have you ever seen this flexible squinting fatty?"

Su Xiaosu asked with a soft tone and tirelessly.

"I am a reasonable woman, generally speaking, will not use violence, you can rest assured."

……

……

Haiting City.

Pudong District.

Time: 18:30.

The sky is already dusk.

Far away.

There are countless metal wrecks floating on the surface of the sea.

The oil stain is on the distant sea, and the sunlight reflects the seven-color rays of light, like slices of rainbow-like Xia Yi, reflecting each other in the sky.

"Well, the coastal city scenery is really unique."

Yi Lin squinted his eyes and looked into the distance, feeling happy.

Right now.

The death mark on Yi Lin's chest vibrates slightly.

At this time, Li Erpang no longer twitched to send text messages, and directly came to the voice call.

"Can I do it?"

Yi Lin looked at the time, and after thinking for a moment, he said to Li Erpang: "19:00."

"Wait, are you sure it's useful? You won't cheat me again, are you?"

Li Erpang's tone still has several points of uncertainty.

Yi Lin actually wants to talk.

Be confident and remove the question mark.

But Yi Lin thinks carefully, in order to increase the success rate of the plan, he still has to calm Little Fatty's emotions a little bit.

"What age is it now?"

Li Erpang hearing this for a moment: "2121?"

Yi Lin hehe smiled: "Yes, It’s been 2121, are you still worried about the unsuccessful plan? Don’t believe me, take the time to check the Haiting City BBS? I just accidentally found a few interesting posts."

Haiting City BBS?

What do you mean?

What is the plan for the Haiting City BBS?

But out of a little trust in Yi Lin and Li Erpang's own curiosity, he still opened the Haiting City BBS.

It does not matter.

At a glance, Li Erpang suddenly became tight.

……

【Barbie female Vajra was discovered in Zhongzhu District of this city! ]

[Zhongzhu District is shocked to find a real woman. There is a picture and the truth! ]

[Be careful with more pictures! ]

[Women's lady is convinced by reason, looking for a flexible squinted fatty! ]

[front row seeds sell soft drinks, elaborate and flexible squint between fatty and women chiefs have to say little secret! ]

[Women's ladies have a headache on the street and cry, is this... Is it moral decay or humanity distortion? ]

……

Yi Lin calculated the time. It is estimated that classmate Li Erpang who is tightly chrysanthemum can read the post and made a "smile" expression with a smile. past.

"Look, this is the age of advanced technology. Nothing is impossible. Believe in yourself and plan."

"I really trust you!"

Li Erpang squeezed a sad tear from the corner of his eyes, and put away the phone in a complicated mood.

At this time, a song rang around Li Erpang at the same time.

That is an eye drops advertisement combined with classical music -

"Don't ask who I am~"

"Please face me~"

"Look at the tears from the corners of my eyes~"

"I am not different from you~"

"But my heart is easier to break~"

……

"……"

"Also, if you wait for that, she may not be able to recognize you, so calm down."

Li Erpang thought for a while, it seems that he is also, not to mention that his fat level is far inferior to that in Gotham City, even more how...Will it be like that?

Thinking about it this way, Li Erpang silently swallowed back his sad tears, and ignored Su Xiaosu for the time being.

Anyway, Haiting is so big and crowded, it may not be possible to run into it, right?

Li Erpang finally refocused his mind on the next plan.

"Okay, just believe you once, this time you don't cheat me like Gotham?"

Yi Lin seriously corrected: "Gotham city is pitted Your person is Pan Zhengyi."

"Fuck!"

Li Erpang instantly remembered what happened in Gotham City, and wished to give the damn Pan Zhengyi a stick. Knock to death.

Yi Lin looked at the time again.

Wrangling with Er Fat classmates for a while, and wasted more than ten minutes.

He temporarily hung up the call of Li Erpang.

Contact Oral.

"Lele, are you ready to shut down the surveillance system in the city? The surveillance system in Haiting City is relatively high level, you know."

"Don't call me Le Le, my name is Oulele!" Oulele first muttered uncomfortably, and then asked with has several points of anxiously: "Are you sure we can really do this? What if something happens..."

"Don't worry, I will inform Zhao Yulong."

"en? When did it happen?" Oral hearing this, couldn't help but startled.

Why don’t I know about such a big thing?

Yi Lin: "Waiting for the meeting."

Oralle: "???"

……

【 18:55].

Yi Lin silently looked at Zhao Yulong's portrait.

"Forget it, let's report afterwards."

cough cough.

Yi Lin is sitting in the corner.

Overlooking the city.

There is a bucket of popcorn by the feet.

There are also two cups of hand brewed coffee.

For the long night, you have to make some preparations.

This mandatory reality task is now the second day.

If everything goes well, it can be resolved tonight.

If it doesn't go well...not surprising.

Yi Lin looked at the time again.

Yi Lin started remote command.

"Er fat classmates Er fat classmates, please take your place!"

Er fat classmates: "...ka ka ka ka ka ka."

" In place?"

"Fuck! Ready!"

Li Erpang said vaguely, as if nibbling on something.

Yi Lin slowly played a question mark, but he didn't care.

So I didn't ask much.

"Student Oulele, classmate Oulele, please take your place!"

In Oulele’s voice, there seemed to be a repressed joy that could not be concealed: "Oulele is already there. Bit!"

Click.

The minute hand moves.

Yi Lin slightly smiled: "Show Time."

……

……

【19:00】.

Haiting City.

Pudong District.

Night falls.

People come and walk.

Bustling.

For the bustling Haiting City, at this time, the lively nightlife has just begun.

Li Erpang finished a big bag of chicken legs on time.

Although it is a synthetic high-quality protein, compared to the original fried chicken drumsticks in Gotham City, Li Erpang always feels a loss of realm.

"Ah, it really is the original one."

Li Erpang spit out the synthetic chicken bones, throwing away the garbage bag.

Suddenly he realized that this is not Gotham.

You don’t have to brush off the crime value.

So classmate Li Erpang picked up the trash again and threw it into the smart trash can.

The moment when the smart trash can "eats" the garbage, it emits a sweet as sweet as Maria Ozawa's synthetic sound: "Thank you for feeding me! Dear!"

" ......"

Li Erpang decided to ignore this shameful AI voice.

Fuck, who would be happy! ha ha ha!

Tzzzzzzz ――

Suddenly there was a slight current noise from the monitoring device overhead.

To be precise, it should be the monitoring equipment in the whole city, all of which came from different levels of noise at the same time.

――It's abolished.

"OK!"

Li Erpang hid in the alley and slowly took out the pre-prepared props from the storage space.

While having several points of restlessness in my heart, I felt a little crazy pleasure at the same time.

As apostle, he is too peaceful in the real world.

charge charge charge!

Who is afraid of whom!

Who is afraid of Who!

……

……

"Huh? You guys look at it? What is that?"

"Are you making a movie? ? " " no, ah, not around a camera ah? " " you stupid ah, I heard that now in its latest mini-tracking cameras, the purpose is to fully Arouse the emotions of the actors and strive to achieve the most realistic effect..."

"666, real or fake?"

"..."

a Strong posture.

Silently appeared in the crowded Pudong District of Haiting City.

The lower body...it's normal.

On the man’s head, he was wearing a funny bunny headgear with big eyes. Two faint holes were cut out at the position of the two eyes, and the bunny’s two pink ears stood tall. It gives people a cute feeling.

Although this rabbit looks a little fat, but overall, the size is acceptable.

Behind the big-eyed rabbit, there is a dark and narrow box on his back, about one meter long, and I don't know what's inside.

The rabbit strode high, walking on the bustling street.

Instantly attracted the attention of countless people eating melons.

After all, it's not time to show up.

Compared with others, this costume looks very ghostly when walking on the road.

As a result, countless people immediately habitually picked up their mobile phones and snapped photos of the big-eyed rabbit in the bustling street with a crack crack.

What the fuck?

Is this ready for hot search?

Li Erpang originally had some doubts about Yi Lin's "plan".

But when I saw the reaction of the people, I was immediately happy.

This is indeed the era when traffic is king!

As long as you dare to fight, even a dog can be so hot!

I didn't expect Li Erpang also had a day as a star.

fatty very pleased in one's mind thinking about it.

Although he also knows that his outfit looks a little shameful.

But this is not important.

No one can recognize himself even if he covers his face anyway.

I guess it is my old fogey from Golden Fire Eyes. I have to weigh it a few times when I see this headgear.

What a perfect disguise!

It’s perfect!

There is no weak spot.

Li Erpang took various poses to the camera by the way.

Happy mood.

crack crack.

Li Erpang, wearing a "big-eyed rabbit" headgear, is like a bright star in the night of Haiting City at this moment.

Extraordinarily dazzling.

Soon.

Li Erpang’s costume instantly occupied the hot post of Haiting City’s BBS at a terrifying speed.

I instantly liked several other hot posts.

By the way, before Li Erpang appeared, the original hot post was-

[Star Li Changge was jealous of enthusiastic fans and sent a realistic-sized and exploding doll ! ]

[Women's lady is still tirelessly searching for a flexible squinted fatty! Please fatty, come and take away the ladies' boss! ]

[C13 train exploded-beep beep]

The follow-up content has been 404.

Anyway.

As soon as a new hot post appeared, it received hundreds of thousands of views and likes in just a few minutes.

The speed of this fire is terrifying.

Of course, no one knows.

Oral Le is hiding behind the scenes, secretly enjoying herself.

The traffic of other hot posts was unconsciously lowered by him.

This kind of operation is extremely simple for Oralle.

Otherwise, it is just a fatty wearing a headgear. Under normal circumstances, it is difficult to top the hot posts of "women's gangsters".

After all, compared with the hooded bunny, the women's clothing boss is more curious and can satisfy the psychology of the people who eat melons.

……

[Shocked! A "big-eyed fat rabbit" was found on the streets of Pudong District. The poster seriously suspected that he had accidentally entered the street shooting scene! There are pictures and the truth! Be careful with more pictures! ] ...... Post soon fire up.

One hundred thousand.

Two hundred thousand.

In just ten minutes.

With the help of Oulele, Li Erpang's new look became popular on the BBS in Haiting City.

Among them, another reason why this post can become popular in a short period of time is that Erfaan students put up various difficult poses very cooperatively.

[19:30]

Half an hour passed quickly.

At the same time.

Zhongzhu District, Haiting City.

Su Xiaosu is still tirelessly persuading people with reason, constantly wanting to ask about the location of Li Erpang.

Although the process is a bit difficult.

Within fifty meters of her, no one dared to approach her.

After all, Su Xiaosu's body shape, murderous aura is a bit heavy.

But this is not important.

Su Xiaosu believes that as long as the effort is deep, the iron rod will be ground into a needle.

In the vast crowd, as long as you have the destiny, it is not difficult to find Li Erpang.

Su Xiaosu suddenly found out.

The atmosphere of the surrounding people seems a bit wrong.

They all stared at their hands together, whispering about something with weird faces.

I still seem very happy.

Su Xiaosu: "?"

She walked up quietly.

There are a few little girls sitting there.

giggled.

"Hehe, hehe, this fat rabbit is so interesting, shouldn't it really be the shooting scene?"

"It's hard to say, maybe it was a short video? Didn't it? 't expect is really hot."

"Yes, unfathomable mystery is hot."

Just when a few little girls were browsing BBS hot posts.

The colorful neon lights above my head were suddenly obscured by a large shadow.

When they realized that it was dark in front of them, they lifted the head subconsciously, all of them turned pale with fright, and they called mother one after another.

Su Xiaosu tried his best to squeeze a kind smile: "What are you looking at? Who is the fat rabbit?"

"Yes, get sick! I don't know how to watch BBS!"

Although several little girls were taken aback by Su Xiaosu, Su Xiaosu’s lethality is undoubtedly weak for women. After they reacted, they did not dare to stay where they were, and left at the fastest speed. Su Xiaosu's side.

Haiting Forum?

Su Xiaosu muttered to himself.

She pinched the phone with two fingers.

Swipe on the screen with difficulty.

――Because the slap is too big.

Finally opened the Haiting City BBS.

A top hot post with a reading volume of up to one million is reflected in Su Xiaosu's eyes.

Suddenly.

Su Xiaosu smiled sweetly.

"Finally...find you."

……

【19:40】

Zhongzhu District.

The Mayor’s Office.

as everyone knows, the mayor of Haiting City has the surname Li.

Almost everyone in Haiting City knows that the mayor of Haiting City is also one of the five giants of the "Z5 Council".

After all, that is a person who often appears in the news.

A gesture of action is enough to cause a major earthquake in the entire Dragon Kingdom.

"Patriarch, it’s not good! I just sent a message from various district police stations. It is said that around 19:00, the city’s surveillance system was paralyzed almost at the same time for some unknown reason. Now The technical team is rushing for repairs."

"Repairing? No need."

A middle-aged man laughed in a simple dress sitting on an office chair, happily swiping his phone. .

The confidant of Li Family, who is rushing in in a fierce wind, is also the mayor's most trusted male secretary. Hearing this immediately looked bewildered.

No, no need?

What do you mean?

"Hehe, leave the monitoring system alone, Xiaode, come and take a look at this."

Although the male secretary has countless question marks in his heart, the mayor has already spoken, male The secretary didn't dare to say anything, and walked in silently, standing by his side respectfully.

I saw the mayor’s mobile phone, and it was a popular post on the BBS of Haiting City.

The male secretary at first hasn't paid much attention yet.

But looking at it, his eyes gradually widened.

"Little De, do you see anything?"

"Uh...patriarch..." The male secretary hesitated: "forgive me to speak bluntly...at a glance, This one wearing a bunny headgear...may be a bit like Er Fat Young Master."

"Be confident and remove the five words'may be a bit like'." The middle age person rubbed his eyebrows, Put down the phone: "It's my stupid son. What is he tossing about?"

"Really Young Master?"

"Forget it, just ignore him, then monitor system, "other people" have taken over, so let the notification go down and there is no need to repair it for the time being."

The eyes of the middle age person are faintly shining: "Also, let the city's ambulances, fire brigades, and rescue teams Stand by at any time, Haiting, in these two days, it may not be calm."

On the mayor’s office computer interface.

A read message has not had time to close.

The signature of the mail is clearly-

"special group", Oralle.

……

……

Time passes.

No matter how happily being a star, there is always time to get bored.

even more how Classmate Li Erpang was already blinded by a large flash of light.

While trying to squeeze the crowd, he moved quickly in Pudong District.

"Hey, are you sure this is true? Fatty, I feel like I have nothing to do with eggs other than being photographed like a monkey?"

"Hehe, no Monkeys are fat rabbits with big eyes."

Yi Lin smiled and corrected, and added: "And, don’t I think you are having fun?"

"Le your sister! Do you see me in your eyes? Are you sure, other people really don't recognize me?"

Li Erpang began to feel a little unconfident again.

"Don't worry, I'm generally speaking, I don't recognize it."

Unless...the kind you are familiar with.

"That's good!" Li Erpang was comforted by Yi Lin again, finally relieved.

Suddenly.

Yi Lin eyes shrank, his voice became serious in an instant.

"fatty, don't look back, behind you, at seven o'clock, about 50 meters, there is a woman with dyed red hair..."

"!"

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